I wasn't going to update so soon after the last chapter, and when I did it was going to be much more serious than this. Still, when the idea struck I couldn't stop myself, so here's a silly little bonus chapter before things get really serious. It's short. It's stupid. It was fun. Next chapter I promise I will get back on track. What the heck, enjoy. Or don't.

Rozen Maiden: Märchen

EPISODE TWELVE

Intermission

"Ohhh, c'mon Jun-kun!"

"Forget it Nori!" Jun said, waving his hands to dismiss her suggestion, "Do I have to remind you that mom and dad will be here the day after tomorrow? How the heck do you think they'd react if they saw me like this?" He gestured to draw attention to the fact that he was still physically in his mid twenties, thanks to Shinku tinkering around with his time key several days ago. Nori wilted dejectedly.

"It's just that you look so-" she began. Not wanting to hear his sister gush over how pretty he was again, Jun cut her off.

"And I'll look this way again. Just in ten years time when I get there the normal way. For now though I'd quite like to go back to the way I was." He turned to Shinku and crossed his arms. "Shinku?"

"As you wish, Jun. Prepare yourself; this will require a great deal of your energy."

She raised her hand and called forth her magic once more, filling the living room with a radiant crimson glow cast by her rose ring. Almost immediately Jun's ring flared brightly in response, and he clutched at his hand as it burned him. His face contorted with pain, teeth clenched together as he struggled to keep from crying out. Nori's hand shot to her mouth and she gasped at the sight. She knew exactly how it felt, having endured the sensation of Kirakishou sucking the energy from her during her brief spell as the seventh doll's Medium.

Jun shrank. There was no other way to describe it. Within seconds he became shorter and smaller, as if someone had recorded a time-lapse video of him growing up and then played it back in reverse from end to beginning. In ten seconds he de-aged ten years.

More or less.

"There, that should suffice," said Shinku primly as she lowered her hand. Nori blinked and peered down at Jun, her hand still clutched to her mouth. Her expression had changed however from one of sympathy to confusion.

"Err, Shinku?" she said tentatively.

Shinku stared at Jun as he whined plaintively about how much that had hurt. He hadn't yet realised the problem, but he would any second now. Nori and Shinku though could see immediately what had gone wrong.

"Oh dear ..." said Shinku.

"Wait a second, what's up with my voice?" Jun asked as he finally became aware that something was not quite right. He glanced down at himself and then looked from one hand to the other. Or at least tried to. He couldn't see his hands, owing to the sleeves of his shirt and suit covering them completely. This might be because the suit had been tailored for a twenty five year old Jun, whilst the Jun currently wearing it was only seven.

He was supposed to be fourteen. Shinku had overshot and wound his age back to half what it was meant to be.

"Aaaahhhh!" Jun yelped as he realised this, his voice quite a bit higher than normal. His adult-sized glasses slipped off his face and fell to the floor, right next to his trousers. Thankfully the shirt and suit jacket were so long on him now that they made up for the lack of said trousers. He did look ridiculous though, it had to be said. Like a little boy that had tried to dress up in his father's business suit. Eyes wide with alarm, he gaped at Shinku, horrified.

"SHINKU! What the hell did you do to me?"

Jun was now much closer to Shinku's height than he'd ever been before, and the Rozen doll barely had to look up at him at all to meet his panicky gaze. She reached up and adjusted her bonnet, somewhat at a loss to explain the miscalculation. Before she could think up words of apology or assurance, Nori beamed with delight at the sight of him and clasped her hands together, her eyes very nearly sparkling with joy.

"Soooooo cuuuuuuute!" she squealed. Jun turned his attention from Shinku to Nori.

"Uh-oh."

What followed could only be described as a glomp. It was far too enthusiastic to be likened to a mere hug or embrace. Jun struggled to fight his sister off as she clung tightly to him, yelling obscenities one would not expect to hear from an actual seven year old, or at least not from a properly raised one. Nori utterly ignored his protests and treated him as if he were an adorable and fluffy plushie, much to his dismay.

"I - swear! Honestly, people complain that I am the loud one around here, but I am so not causing this racket!" Suiseiseki strutted into the living room to investigate the source of the noise, stopping next to Shinku. "Have you finished turning the puny runt back into his normal puny geeky gawky self yet?" she asked. When Shinku did not answer, Suiseiseki turned to regard Nori and Jun, her mismatching eyes growing wide at the ridiculous spectacle of them both.

"Nori! Get the hell off me!"

"Juuun-kuuuun!"

"How many times have I told you, I am not a freaking teddy bear! Let go! ARGH! Dammit Nori, get yourself a boyfriend already, you're freaking me out!"

Jun's admonishments might have carried more weight were they not delivered by a squeaky seven year old voice that merely added to his cuteness in Nori's eyes. Shinku sighed and glanced at her pocket watch. Somehow she didn't think Jun would be agreeable to making her tea anytime soon. How annoying. Suiseiseki continued to stare for several seconds longer before she fell over laughing.

In the end Shinku had to slap Nori with her hair to get the girl to stop squeezing Jun, and even then Nori kept giving him the kind of look that would probably get her locked up were their respective genders reversed. When it came to cute little things, Nori had about as much willpower as Micchan. Less when it came to her brother, and seeing Jun physically reverted to the way he was when he was seven pretty much reduced her to a gibbering wreck.

The bad news was that Shinku couldn't correct her little mistake until at least a day had gone by, otherwise it could kill Jun. As Mediums went, it was a miracle he'd been able to take the kind of energy drain required to pull off such a time reversal in the first place. Shinku didn't dare risk using any more of his power, and she was the only doll besides Kirakishou capable of such time manipulation.

So he was stuck that way for the day. There was still the question of what he was going to wear. He couldn't spend the day in a suit fitted for an adult, but none of his own clothes would fit him either. Finally Suiseiseki announced that she had a solution, and dragged Jun into the storeroom containing the mirror. A brief trip to the N-Field later, Suiseiseki returned and declared the problem solved.

"Where's Jun?" Souseiseki asked her twin. Suiseiseki glanced around. The door to the storeroom behind her was now shut. She frowned up at it.

"Jun?" she called out.

"Go away!" came his muffled reply. Suiseiseki banged on the door.

"Open up, you! Don't you want to show everyone how nice you look?"

"No! I'm not coming out!"

Shinku and Souseiseki exchanged wary looks at this. "Suiseiseki," Shinku said carefully, "What precisely was your solution if I may ask?"

The Gardener doll shrugged as if it were simplicity itself. "Remember when puny Ichigo dragged that Tomoe girl into her N-Field to play with her? She used her powers to dress the girl up and make her look just like her puny self. I did the same kind of thing to Jun."

"You didn't," Souseiseki said, burying her face in her hand. Her twin nodded enthusiastically.

"I so did. I swear Souseiseki, I should have done this a long time ago. The puny human looks so much better this way, honestly!"

"You put Jun in a dress?"

"What?" Suiseiseki seemed puzzled by her twin's tone, and shrugged again, "It's not like it's the first time for him. Didn't you see the pictures that crazy Micchan lady took of him during that photo shoot? I'm sure I showed them to you Souseiseki."

Shinku hammered on the door with her cane and demanded that Jun come out at once. He stubbornly refused, and had either locked the door or was holding it shut, as her own attempts to open it got nowhere.

"Jun! You are my servant," Shinku scolded, hammering on the door again with her cane, "I command you to open this door immediately!"

"Like hell! I've had enough of you guys screwing around with me! I'm on strike!"

"Can't say I blame him," Souseiseki muttered darkly, knowing only too well how it felt to be forced into a dress against one's will. Shinku however had had enough, and wanted her tea already. Thinking the matter over for a second, a particularly devious possibility occurred to her. It was quite evil actually, and normally she wouldn't sink so low, but under the circumstances ...

"Jun, if you do not open this door at once then I shall have no choice but to fetch Nori and inform her of your predicament."

Silence. The twins stared at Shinku in shock, astonished that she would use such a diabolical threat. It was bad enough that Jun was stuck being seven years old again, but if Nori learned he was in a dress as well ... it didn't bear thinking about. She probably would do something that'd get her locked up. As ultimatums went, it was borderline blackmail. Jun would probably be better off calling Suigintou a worthless piece of junk to her face. At least then the resultant scars would be physical rather than the deep psychological wounds Nori would inflict upon him.

The door opened.

"Oh my," said Shinku.

An intensely embarrassed Jun Sakurada emerged wearing a sailor fuku uniform, his short thick hair tied in pigtails with ribbons and his face wearing the most miserable expression imaginable. Suiseiseki giggled, despite being the one responsible for dressing him thusly.

"Shut up," said Jun.

"I never said anything," Suiseiseki protested innocently. Jun glared at her. If the power of the Force actually existed he'd happily go to the Dark Side just to choke her with it.

"I'm pre-empting you. And for the record I hate you guys. I can't imagine what I ever did to deserve this."

Shinku finally regained her senses and cleared her throat lightly. "I fail to see why you are making such a fuss, Jun; it was my understanding that you enjoy dressing in female attire. Why else would Suiseiseki adorn you in such garments?"

Jun glowered at the doll in question, his tiny hands clenched tight at his sides. "I can think of a few reasons ..."

Suiseiseki closed her eyes and extended her hands dismissively. "Quit your whining, you. I so did you a favour, the very least you could do is thank me for helping out."

Jun couldn't take it anymore. He pressed the palms of his hands against his eyes and whimpered. "First you guys turn me into an adult. Then you turn me into a kid. And now you've dressed me up as a schoolgirl. Do me a favour will you?"

"What?"

"STOP HELPING ME!"