Hi again! don't you think I'm rather quick lately? Don't expect it to always be like this, though. I'm a horrible procrastinator! :(

Just a little WARNING before you dive into this chapter: IT'S GONNA BE FLUFFY! God, I'm such a girl! But I do love this chapter and I hope you'll share my opinion. Enjoy!

chapter 12 - Don't Let Me Go

.o.O.O.o.

On Monday came the first rain of the season. The sky and sun hid behind heavy grey clouds and people rushed about in the streets, hidden underneath their umbrellas. The rain was not that heavy, though, and you could find some people with no umbrellas to protect them, letting themselves be soaked by the rain.

Sasuke was one of those people. He loved rainy days. They always made him feel axcited and refreshed for some reason. It was a good feeling, because feeling refreshed was always nice. Walking in the rain was one of his favorite activities during the rainy season. It was not much of an activity, really, more of a pastime thing. It sounded pitiful, he knew, but it really wasn't, and he truthfully enjoyed it. The feel of raindrops against his skin, that feeling of utter freedom it brought. There was nothing quite like it. There was just something about walking in the rain that made him feel so free and at ease. Everyone was trying to hide from the rain but Sasuke loved it. Of course, he didn't do this all the time because then all his clothes would be ruined, but whenever he had some free time and was feeling like it, he would go on a walk in the rain.

The first day of rain was always more enjoyable than the rest. It was like the first time of doing something very significant, and no matter how many first days of rain have passed, to Sasuke they always felt the same.

Today was another first day of rain and Sasuke was out in the streets right after arriving home from school. He didn't even bother to put his bag in his room, just threw it carelessly on the couch, and he ignored Itachi when his brother asked what he would like to have for lunch. Sasuke didn't care what was for lunch, he just wanted to be in the rain.

For the past few days, his thoughts were in a jumble. A big messy jumble. It had all started the day Neji phoned him and informed him of Naruto's upcoming birthday. Apparently he wasn't invited,Sasuke suspected that it was by the order of Her Highness Tsunade-sama, Naruto's mother, but Sasuke hadn't thought otherwise. She probably hated him for causing her son so much grief. Well, tough.
However, Neji, whom Sasuke knew harbored a deep crush (that was bordering on obsession) for Gaara, did something Sasuke hadn't expected him to do. He had informed Sasuke about the birthday party, and offered to deliver his gift to Naruto. Now, it wasn't that Sasuke was an ungrateful person, he just didn't think about saying thank you. He hadn't deemed it necessary to be thankful when he didn't ask for the help.

He knew what Neji had in mind, though.
Neji was sure Sasuke had feelings for Naruto and although Sasuke wanted badly to deny it, he couldn't. So when Neji said: "but I can give Naruto your present", Sasuke could only laugh. It wasn't funny, and his laugh was humorless, but it was a laugh nontheless. Neji had probably wondered what was wrong with him. But still, Sasuke felt something in him and it was what made him say: "I'll see what I can do."

Sasuke had a hard time picking up a good gift for Naruto. The thing is, he wasn't usually the one picking up gifts for his friends. Itachi did it for him, it was simply too troublesome, but the fact that he had gone and actually tried to think of a gift for Naruto was saying something about the way he felt. Yes, Sasuke was a cold bastard but Naruto was like sunshine. Of course Sasuke himself didn't even dare to think that thought, it was too unnerving.
So, right after he hung up, he sat down to think of a gift for Naruto. It had proved harder than he thought, since he didn't really know the guy. And it was funny how he actually wanted so much to know him more. Pathetic was his thought, really. He had thought about asking for Itachi's help, but then decided against it. He couldn't name it, but something stopped him from asking his brother for help. It was a gift for Naruto, and Sasuke felt like it should be private. Was he finally cracking up? It was very possible, considering all the other little things that has accumulated during the past days. And he wasn't thinking about those silly 'I-accidentally-put-my-cellphone-in-the-fridge' things. He was thinking about not being able to think of anything else but Naruto, or having dreams about him, or wondering if Naruto would be impressed when (Sasuke was a cocky bastard, justifiably) he would beat the crap out of Haki's Kendo team. He never felt this way before and what Sasuke didn't know, he didn't like. It was a defence mechanism of sorts, to make sure that he didn't get hurt. Annoying but, well, you had to survive somehow.

Sasuke first thought of buying Naruto clothes but then it seemed too simple and mundane to him. He wanted to make sure it was a gift Naruto would cherish. Sasuke's sadistic side wanted to make sure it would be something that would torment the guy a bit, if possible. What could possibly be the perfect gift? When he had thought about it some more, he remembered that day at the mall and so he came to the conclusion that he himself had made Naruto cry! But so what? He stared up at the ceiling, thinking hard. It would have to be something that will remind Naruto of Sasuke, of their past and of his love for him. Sasuke smirked in satisfaction. He wasn't really a sadist, but sometimes he did enjoy watching people suffer a bit. And recently he had found out that he preffered it if it was Uzumaki Naruto. But then he remembered how distraught he himself felt when he had watched Naruto's tears nearly fall on that day, and he scowled. God, he was a mess.

He deicded to let go of the problem for a while. Maybe, if he waited a day or two, the answer will come to him.
And, indeed, it came.

Saturday night, alone in his room. Sasuke was staring at his wall when suddenly a patch of gold had caught his eye. In an instant he was out of his bed, making his way to the wall. He didn't even notice he was holding his breath untill he finally let it out when his eyes found what they were looking for.

A photograph.

At that moment, Sasuke knew it would be the perfect gift. It would remind Naruto of him, fill him with questions and consequently-the need to have the answers. And it would torment him a little bit. Sasuke smirked. But as he slid the photograph into a simple brown envelope, he tried to ignore that little voice in the back of his mind that kept telling him that he was also hoping it would make Naruto come to visit him.

Now he was in the rain, savoring the feeling of freedom.

Naruto hadn't contacted him like Sasuke had hoped. Maybe he was wrong? Maybe he should've given him a different present? Anyhow, he couldn't doubt his choice now because there was nothing he could do about it anyway.

A woman rushed past him, only to spare him an incredulous look. Let her stare, he didn't give a damn. A city bus drove by, straight through a huge puddle on the road but, luckily, Sasuke only got his shoes wet. It didn't matter anyway, he was soaked already.
Then, suddenly, Sasuke noticed the rain stopped. He looked up and was greeted by warm blue eyes that belonged to a certain dobe who was holding a large blue umbrella over Sasuke's head.

"Hi Sasuke," those soft-looking lips said but Sasuke was too shocked to say anything. "Why didn't you take an umbrella with you?" Naruto asked with concern, his eyebrows suddenly furrowed.

"I was counting on you to bring it for me," Sasuke regained his composure and was smirking at Naruto. Naruto said nothing.

Sasuke's mind was like a storm of thoughts and questions. Naruto looked really good in those jeans and boots, why was Naruto wearing an orange shirt underneath his jacket? Why is he here? That dark cashmere scarf seemed to be really warm, Naruto looked really good.

"Thank you," once again Naruto's soft voice dragged him back to reality and Sasuke felt stupid for a moment there. Why did Naruto have such an effect on him? "For the photograph." Naruto looked away. He was blushing. Thank you for believing me, his eyes said.

Sasuke said nothing, letting the awkward silence linger for a little longer. He didn't know why he liked tormenting Naruto so much, all he could say was that there was an annoying feeling in his stomach whenever Naruto was around, or whenever he thought of him. He hated that feeling, so maybe he just wanted to hurt whatever-whoever-made him feel that way.

But more than that feeling, Sasuke hated Naruto's look after he'd been hurt by Sasuke.

That's why, not thinking at all, Sasuke grabbed Naruto's hand that wasn't holding the umbrella and pulled him down to sit on a nearby bench.

"Wha-?" Naruto began but Sasuke's hand on his cheek made him forget whatever it was he wanted to ask. He couldn't move, couldn't breathe, as Sasuke's fingers traced those whisker-like marks on his cheek ever so softly. Sasuke's face was serious and thoughtful, his eyes darker than usual and his pale lips slightly parted. Naruto knew his own face was flushed red.

"You're going to run away?" Sasuke whispered softly, leaning closer. Naruto swallowed. He did want to run away but at the same time he didn't. His breaths came out in pants, and he felt so hot in his warm clothes. He gave no answer.

"Then I'm going to kiss you." Naruto barely had time to register those words before soft pale lips descended upon his and he was soon on fire. Every molecule in his body burned and he felt so, so hot in his jacket and boots and thick socks! Sasuke's hands held his face firmly but gently and Naruto melted into his touch. Sasuke's tongue took the liberty of exploring his mouth and Naruto let him, unable to resist Sasuke at all. He'd never been able to resist Sasuke.

The umbrella lay forgotten on the ground, the two boys never noticing the rain that was gone, or the warm rays of the sun as it peeked from behind the clouds.

The need for air finally broke them apart. Naruto stared at Sasuke, too dazed for words, and Sasuke could barely restrain himself from doing other things to Naruto, who looked so edible with that look on his face.

"Umm..." Naruto tried to find words, but his mind failed him yet again. Fortunately Sasuke spoke right then. "Did you like my gift?" he asked slyly and the smirk on his lips made Naruto wonder which one of them he was referring to. His blush deepened and he managed a small "yes". He liked them both, he thought, still blushing.

"Good."

Sasuke stood up and picked up Naruto's umbrella off of the ground. Naruto stood up too, not daring to look at Sasuke. What now?

Sasuke was cursing himself by then. What the hell was he thinking? What? Kissing Naruto was not on his to-do list for the day. In fact, it was not on any list at all. But he just couldn't stop himself! He had been thinking of Naruto, imagining his face, and suddenly said boy was there, holding an umbrella and smiling softly at him. Sasuke wanted to do something, maybe scream, but then Naruto said: "maybe I should go..." and began to move away and every part of Sasuke was going into panic, protesting against Naruto's departure.

"Wait," he said before he could stop himself, and reached out to grab Naruto's arm. Naruto spun around, Sasuke saw surprise in his eyes and something else... was it hope? "You're soaked, dobe," he said, masking his own feelings with indifference. He thought Naruto would blow him off, tell him it's ok and leave, but he didn't. Naruto's face suddenly lit up and he smiled at Sasuke, making the latter catch his breath at the sight. God, I'm so pathetic, Sasuke thought. "I'll give you something to change into," he told Naruto. His house was not far away, anyway. Also, he couldn't deny that big part of him that wanted to stay with Naruto for as long as possible.

~O~O~O~O~

Gaara was irritated. Very irritated. What the hell was Hyuuga doing in his house? He glared menacingly at the other boy but it seemed to not affect him at all. Which angered Gaara even more, of course. That Hyuuga was getting on his nerves already.

"Gaara, be nice!" Temari ordered but shook her head when her words seemed to fall on deaf ears. Gaara was still glaring and Neji was giving him a very serious look. Gaara wanted to give him a good punch, one that would break his perfect nose, and he felt so frustrated that he couldn't! It was just one tiny punch! No, he couldn't.

The truth was, Gaara was wary of Neji, to the point of being scared of him. And it was not like Neji was very intimidating, well not to other people, but he seemed to have succesfully scared Gaara. Which was quite the accomplishment, really. Gaara was not intimidated by anything and he didn't give a damn about the whole world and its sister. But Neji, poor him, had managed to frighten him. And all because he said some words which Gaara never wanted to hear again. It was times like these that he wished to be back at Wave, far away from this damned city and its inhabitants. Impossible, but hey, one can always wish! (1)

Neji wasn't doing anything anyway, he was just sitting there, looking slightly nervous and very serious about it. The only thing he said since coming in was 'good afternoon ma'am' to Shizune and 'hello Gaara-kun' when Gaara came to see who it was. Ever since then Neji sat on the couch, only saying 'thank you' to Temari when she served them tea.

"Why are you here?" Gaara demanded. At that moment he was the epitome of danger, a man not to mess with, but as usual, Neji was didn't seem impressed.

"I've missed your presence," was the answer. It sounded honest but Gaara didn't trust a word.
"And I haven't so go back home," he replied coldly.
"Why?"
"'Cause I don't want you here."
"No, why haven't you missed me?"

Silence.

"Why the fuck would I miss you?" from somewhere in the house came Temari's voice: "Gaara! Language!" They both ignored her and Neji asked, rather hurt, "don't you like me at all?" The answer was a cold and to-the-point "no."

"Do you hate me, then?" the answer, surprisingly, was also no but it was such a reluctant no, Neji nearly felt sorry for Gaara. "Then why don't you..." he struggled to find the right words, "why can't you like me?"

"Your questions are always ridiculous," said Gaara and looked away. He hated it, that feeling of anxiety, of wariness, he felt whenever he was around the Hyuuga. His world was being shaken and it was Neji's fault. But more irritating was his own inability to answer the other boy's questions. It wasn't that he didn't know the answers, because Gaara knew them all too well, he just couldn't bring himself to say the words. So many walls have been built around his heart and mind, so many defences were put up in order to protect them! He couldn't just surrender now. It wasn't worth it, nothing was.

"You keep saying that. And yet," Neji narrowed his eyes at him, "I know you don't mean it at all." Gaara snorted. "You don't know anything." Neji shrugged and replied, "you're just a coward."
The punch that hit his jaw was hard enough to bruise him, but Neji couldn't even think about that because, suddenly, Gaara's face was only a few centimeters away from his, and Neji could feel Gaara's hot breath on his face. He tried hard not to blush, but as he felt his cheeks warming up, he knew he failed miserably. Gaara saw nothing of that, though. His eyes were two green flames of rage and he was holding Neji by the collar of his shirt, his knuckles white.

"You little bag of shit," he hissed, his voice dangerously low. "You don't know what you're talking about. You little snotty, rich bastard, you've never been hurt before. You've lived your whole life inside your perfect little bubble and you know nothing about love or hate, or pain! Who are you to judge me? Who are you to march right in and claim you love me? I will not lower myself to such ridiculous emotions and I will not let you ruin all that I've been working for all this time!"

Now, Neji was afraid. Gaara was furious, seriously pissed like hell. He hadn't intended on provoking the guy, honestly, and he wasn't expecting that. Was this how other people usually felt around Gaara? This great fear that he could hurt them, and the knowledge that he had no qualms about doing so? But if he did have no qualms about hurting people, why didn't he just beat the crap out of Neji? Something, a peculiar thought, made itself known in the back of Neji's mind.

"I'll never hurt you, Gaara-kun." And just like that, Gaara backed off and was back on the opposite couch. His expression was unreadable, as if that outburst was something he hadn't been able to control and was now trying to prevent another one.

Gaara was shocked, to say the least. It was almost like Neji was able to read his thoughts! His earlier outburst was not something he wanted to repeat. How could he let his control slip away like that? It was frustrating.

"I'll never hurt you, Gaara-kun," Neji repeated, almost begging. "Please, give me a chance."

~O~O~O~O~

"Good afternoon, Uchiha-san."
"Please call me Itachi, Naruto-kun."

Naruto felt bad for dripping all over the floor and he had apologized to Itachi. Itachi smiled and assured him it was no problem at all. And indeed, a maid soon came rushing with a mop to wipe the wet floor. "Are you going to stay for dinner?" Itachi asked, still smiling amicably. "Umm, no, I don't think so. My mom would be mad if I don't come back," Naruto answered sheepishly. Of course, it wasn't really the truth. If he told her he was at a friend's she wouldn't mind. But if he told her he was at Sasuke's she'd be furious. And he wasn't going to lie to her.

"Don't be shy, Naruto-kun," Itachi insisted. "Besides, we're having Sasuke's favorite. You might like it too."

Sasuke's favorite. He wondered what that could be. He didn't like sweets, that Naruto knew, maybe something spicy? "Dobe, you're staying," Sasuke decided for him. "It will probably rain again later, so stay and Itachi will give you a ride home." It was obvious no one has ever argued with Sasuke before, what with the authority in his voice and the look he gave Naruto which dared him to protest. Naruto protested. "Bastard, you can't just decide for people!" he scowled. But he couldn't deny the fact that there was sense in sasuke's words. "Is that a yes?" Itachi asked, clearly amused. Naruto pouted and Sasuke sent his brother a glare before dragging Naruto away.

In Sasuke's room, the awkward silence resumed. Sasuke covered his nervousness by doing things. He picked up clothes for Naruto to change into, and after giving him a nice large towel he showed Naruto the bathroom. Then, while Naruto was in the shower, he lay down on his bed and heaved a deep sigh. What the hell was he doing? Not for the first time this day, he was wondering if he was finally going bonkers. Clearly, and Sasuke had a hard time admitting this to himself, he was attracted to Naruto. But frankly, who wouldn't? Naruto was gorgeous and there was no denying it. His goledn hair and bright cerulean eyes made him impossible to ignore. But then again, when he thought about it, Naruto's brother, Gaara, was also very good looking and so was Neji but Sasuke didn't feel attracted to them. Neji was an idiot and Gaara was just too creepy. What was it about Naruto that made him stand out? Why was he different? Was it the Kyuubi? No, Sasuke didn't think so. The Kyuubi was not an up-side of the whole situation, definitely not. So what was it? It sure wasn't just about the looks anymore, but then, what was it about?

Ok. He liked Naruto. Ok, Ok, he more than a little liked him. There, he admitted it. Happy now? But what was it about Naruto which made sasuke like him? His looks was a plus, but it was not the main reason, as he just figured out. So what was it? His head felt like it was going into supernova. Painful.

"Umm, where should I hang this?" he almost fell off his bed. Almost. He looked up, ready to give the blonde a good glare, when his mouth suddenly dried up and his eyes widened. Naruto was wearing one of Sasuke's faded jeans and a dark blue long-sleeved cashmere shirt. His hair was tousled more than usual and his cheeks were flushed from the heat of the shower. Sasuke nearly forgot to answer. When he did remember that he was supposed to say something, he schooled his features and got up to take the wet towel from Naruto.

"Thank you for letting me shower," Naruto said and Sasuke's reply was a simple 'hn'.

They still weren't talking when they went downstairs for dinner. As Sasuke had predicted, it did start to rain again, so Naruto decided it wouldn't hurt to stay (and find out what Sasuke's favorite food was). Itachi was overjoyed, and he made a big deal of fussing(2) around Naruto, making sure he was comfortable enough.

"You brother feels like a mother hen," Naruto whispered to Sasuke.
"It's just the tip of it," Sasuke promised with irritation. "Wait 'till you meet his boyfriend. He's a monster." To that, Naruto looked up at him in surprise. "Am I going to meet him?" he asked softly. Whoops, Sasuke mentally kicked himself for the slip-up. His answer, therefore, was the safe and familiar 'hn'.

"You don't have to do this, you know," Naruto told him after a moment.
"Do what?" he wanted to know. Naruto looked around. "This. Everything. Being nice to me." Sasuke was too stunned to reply and Naruto went on. "You're not normally nice to me." They didn't notice that Itachi was gone from the room and was secretly listening from behind the door (he'd kill anyone who says it was eavesdropping).

"Don't feel special, dobe," Sasuke said coldly. Didn't he normally enjoy hurting people? Then why the hell did it feel so horrible inside now?
"I don't," Naruto replied. "I feel stupid." Why hadn't he listened to his instincts? Why hadn't he listened to his mind when it told him Uchiha Sasuke was no good for him? He felt so pathetic and idiotic for hoping, forever hoping. "I shouldn't have come," he concluded. Sasuke sneered. "Are you going to leave, then?" He didn't know why he was panicking, but he was. Don't leave, he wanted to say, but his mouth wouldn't obey. Naruto sighed. "Yes," he said, "I am." He stood up then and walked to the door. "Thank you for your hospitality, Itachi-san," he smiled at the older Uchiha. Itachi feigned surprise. "What? Are you leaving? But dinner hasn't started yet!" he said, eyebrows raised. "No, it's ok. I really should go," Naruto assured him. "Then let me give you a ride home!" To that Naruto seemed to panic. "No, no!" he protested. "It's ok! I have an umbrella. I don't want to trouble you!" And with that, he said goodbye and was gone.

Don't let me go...

~O~O~O~O~

"Foolish little brother."

Sasuke was still sitting at the table when Itachi came into the room. He ignored his brother and stared at his plate. It wasn't even a glare anymore, just a stare with no passion in it. Just like that, he felt like all his energy was sucked out of him.

A foolish little brother was what he felt like. Come back!, his mind screamed at someone who was no longer there.

"Sasuke." He hadn't felt the gentle hand that was on his shoulder, or his brother's familiar presence. Surprised, Sasuke looked up. Itachi looked down at him fondly. His little brother was all grown up now, but still so young! Itachi remembered how hard it was being a teenager, and also, how happy he had felt during those years. "Sasuke, don't be afraid," he whispered softly to his little brother. Sasuke's eyes widened but he made no other movement. "Don't let him go."

~O~O~O~O~

"Please, give me a chance."

Gaara wanted to run away and never look back. He was so tired of it all! If only he could fall asleep and wake up when all was over. But he wouldn't run away, not after the idiot called him a coward. Gaara was no coward at all.

His heart was beating frantically against his ribcage, as if demanding to be set free. His head was pounding painfully and he was suddenly so exhausted. Neji was giving him a concerned look, but Gaara couldn't look at him.

And what if he let Neji in? What if Neji's words were truthful? What if he truly meant them? Would it be just like he feared it might be? Didn't Gaara deserve to be loved as well? He wasn't different than any other human in the world, why was he destined to be alone?

Was love really worth the risk?

"If I tried," he began slowly, making Neji's eyes shine with hope. "Will you leave me be?"

"What?" Neji cried. "Like hell I will. I'll never leave you be."

Gaara didn't say anything for a long moment. Then a little smile began to form on his lips.

"Then, I'll try."

~O~O~O~O~

Naruto wasn't walking anymore. The rain was now a downpour but he hardly noticed it. He stood there, in the middle of the road, not moving. His heart felt so heavy in his chest. His lower lip was stinging, the result of biting it hard in an attempt to not cry. His limbs felt like they were magnetized to the ground, trying to drag him down with them.

Gaara would deifinitely call him stupid and Tsuande would be furious. But he was feeling horrible already, so it won't be that bad, right?

Naruto could feel the demon in him beginning to stir. Oh no, no, no. He can't let him out again! Not ever again! In his panic, he didn't notice the presence behind him. Kyuubi, however, did and it made the demon growl inside.

A hand reached out and grabbed Naruto's own. "Don't go," a voice whispered into his ear and Naruto finally let go of his bottom lip and let the tears fall down. A soft thumb was instantly on his face, gently wiping them away.

"I'm sorry," Sasuke said softly. Naruto turned to face him.
"I wanted you to not let me go."
"I didn't want to let you go."

The rain didn't matter any longer. Neither was the fear.

Sasuke's lips met Naruto's and he knew that this was it. Naruto. Everything else wasn't important now. He felt like he was dying, but if dying always felt this full of life, then he'd gladly die a thousand deaths.

Their tongues collided and battled for dominance. Naruto's whole body was burning again, electrified. His arms clung to Sasuke's neck and his hands dove into that beautiful dark hair. His heart was overwhelmed by emotions he couldn't describe. Sasuke's hands dug into Naruto's soft locks and his chest was pinned close to Naruto's, their hearts beating ecstatically against each other.

Tears mingled with rain, and pain mixed with healing joy.

This is it, Sasuke's mind supplied to him. He finally felt complete.

And this time, he would make it right. This time, he'll believe.

"I'm not letting you go again." The words were only a whisper, and neither of them knew who was the one who actually spoke them, but it didn't matter anyway. Those words applied to both of them.

.o.O.O.o.

A/N: Hi! I realize this looks like the end, but it's NOT. We all know, love is not easy and life is complicated. So, yeah, our lover boys still have some hardships to overcome. Thank you for reading! Reviwes are always appreciated! :)

(1) - I accidentally typed 'f' instead of 'w' and didn't notice untill I read the whole paragraph. And when I saw it, I laughed. 'cause it turned out to be: "Impossible, but hey, one can always Fish." LOL

(2) - Fussing. Yeah, I tried to remember the word really hard, but my mind protested because I over worked it. So, I decided to go to sleep and hoped that the next day will bring back my memory. It did! Just as I opened the file I was like, 'OMG, to FUSS!' :) so, I guess it a good thing to not push yourself too much and be patient.

-HairoM

edited:

I know some of you may have been notified twice about this chapter already, and I'm really sorry about it! I don't have a beta, and usually I don't go over the chapters 'cause i'm that lazy. This time I felt like it, though. And I'm truly for it all!