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We are at a tie for who wants Sammy with Balthazar and who wants Sammy with Gabriel. 1:1.

Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.

Castiel and Jimmy had to hand it to Balthazar. The man definitely knew how to pick a scene. There was never a dull moment around the man, Castiel thought dryly as they made their way to the bar. A pretty, young bartender was mixing a drink and she looked up at them with a raised eyebrow.

"Hello, sweetheart. I'll take a ménage times… what's French for twelve?" Balthazar pondered. Jimmy rolled his eyes and took over the ordering.

"He'll take one of whatever he just ordered. I'll have whatever this coupon is for and Cas…" Jimmy turned his eyes to his twin, knowing that Castiel had a higher alcohol tolerance than most people.

"Sex on the beach," Castiel said. Jimmy blushed and sputtered nonsense and Balthazar snorted. The corner of Jo's mouth lifted upwards.

"Aren't you just the type?" she asked with a wink. "Coming right up."

Like Jo had said, the Roadhouse was packed when Dean and Sam finally made their appearance. Dean was betting it had to do with the Purple Nurple coupons- which he had at least ten of. Sam had rolled his eyes and told him he was going to die of liver failure when he saw what Dean had done. Dean had promptly replied, "Bitch," to which Sam had responded, "Jerk," and they were on their way. Sam had taken away at least half of Dean's coupons, if not more.

Dean made his way to the bar and Jo caught sight of him, giving him a smile as she expertly slid a drink down the bar and to its owner.

"Hey," Dean said, giving her a customary kiss on the cheek and Sam did the same. "Where's Ellen?"

"Cracking out more whiskey," Jo shrugged.

"So, anything hot?" Dean smirked, leaning on the counter, giving her a coupon for a Purple Nurple, ordering something girly for Sam, which earned him a glare and Sam asking for a beer.

"You mean besides me?" Jo smirked, batting her eyes flirtatiously as she mixed his drink. "Seen a few come in. I'm sure you'll find them yourself if you want some." Dean didn't bother to hide a smirk as he took his drink from her.

"Damn, woman. You know how to make a Purple Nurple," Dean grinned appreciatively at her. Jo rolled her eyes.

"I'd better. I've made at least fifty of those," she grumbled, passing Sam his beer. Dean took another drink before someone caught his eye.

"No way," Dean whispered.

"You say something?" Sam asked.

"Gotta use the head," Dean said, putting his drink down and walking off in the bathroom. When he reached the bathroom, a man passed him and he did a double take, thinking it was Cas. The nickname slipped out from his lips but the man didn't turn around, leading Dean to thinking he either didn't want to see Dean or didn't hear Dean. Either way, Dean was content to let him walk away. He went into the bathroom for the sake of appearances and then froze when he saw Castiel washing his hands.

Castiel reached for a paper towel and then he finally saw Dean and froze.

"Where's your brother?" Balthazar asked, nursing his drink.

"Still in the bathroom, I guess," Jimmy shrugged.

"You know, Jimmy, if I weren't totally wrapped around your little girl's pinky, I'd have fucked you into next March," Balthazar said. Jimmy rolled his eyes.

"I'm married," Jimmy said pointedly.

"Since when have I cared?" Balthazar asked. Jimmy sighed and decided not to point out the obvious about him not being gay.

"Balthazar, I'm not Cas," he said. Balthazar's expression wavered for a moment.

"I know that. Me and Cas? That's just silly. Isn't that Gabriel's lawyer, talking to the bartender?" Balthazar frowned, craning his head to get a better look.

"Sam?" Jimmy asked, turning around to check. "Yeah, that's him. How do you know him?"

"Well, you see, Jimmy boy, I met him in a dream. He was screaming my name," Balthazar smirked, making his way over to the bar after downing his glass in one go, reminding Jimmy of how Balthazar and Castiel had met- their drinking abilities. Jimmy sighed and resisted the urge to bang his forehead against the table. He just had to have asked, didn't he?

"I'm married," he smiled apologetically at the woman approaching him who instantly backed off. With a sigh, he took another drink of his Purple Nurple and immediately made a face.

Why had he agreed to come with them?

"Why don't you come with us, Jimbo?" Balthazar had suggested after Castiel had accepted his invitation to join him at the bar. "We could make this a party, turn it into a threesome. The French have only beautiful-"

"He's not going to shut up until you agree to come," Castiel said in his bored monotone, and even though Castiel had spoken, Balthazar kept on talking as if Castiel hadn't uttered a word.

"Do you know what French for twelve is? I've been trying to figure that out. And I'm sure Amelia won't mind you grabbing a drink with us. If not, I'll call her. She can't resist me asking, but don't blame her, no woman or man really can resist me-"

"If the paranormal exist and you're all so sure they do, go find a damn robot head or alien or whatever Cas keeps talking about yourself," Gabriel continued on with his show. "How hard can it be? Put liquor out for the fairies. Why would you put sugar out for them? It just attracts ants and if it hasn't worked by now, it won't work later so give them something they'll actually like-"

"And I'm sure you can get someone else to watch Claire if Amelia wants the night to herself. She can even come with us if she's willing to watch us – well, me, leave with a one night stand-"

"Shut up and I'll go,"

Oh, right.

Gabriel's and Balthazar's monologues separately were one thing, but together…

Jimmy took a long drink of his Purple Nurple and prayed the two would never realize what hell they could elicit consciously.

It would be Hell on Earth.

"Um…" Castiel said.

"I'm not stalking you, I swear," Dean said, feeling stupid as soon as the words left his mouth. A normal person probably would have attempted a smile or a chuckle but Castiel just stood looking like a deer caught in the headlights. He swallowed.

"My brother says I'm awkward in social situations. My whole family says that. My best friend says that," Castiel mumbled under his breath but it was loud enough for Dean to hear. "Want to make good on what I promised you?" The question was a horrible, desperate attempt to get rid of the awkwardness- it even came out awkward and unconfident- and it left Dean stumped for a minute but when it registered, something feral went off in Dean.

"Hell yes," he growled, closing the distance between him and Castiel and slamming him against the wall, kissing him desperately in a kiss that was all tongue and teeth.