Disclaimer: The characters of Gintama belong to Sorachi Hideaki. :)

Authors Note: Hey! So busy! DAMN! I'm not even that old! Enjoy chapter 24!

Chap. 24 Never Fight With Strange Men. They Might Kill You, You Dumbass

"Um, I don't know about this, Gintoki." The Shogun says warily.

"Oh c'mon, what's it going to hurt?"

"No, I'm pretty sure it's going to hurt a lot."

"You're from a line of warriors; of course you can do this."

"Gintoki, I know for sure it's going to hurt, it'll probably burn when it goes in, I mean I probably won't be able to shit for a week."

"No, this will help your bowels. It will make the shit flow more freely."

"No, I can't!" The Shogun screams, throwing the sake cup, filled with strawberry milk.

"AH! You don't just go throwing strawberry milk!" Gintoki screams. "What happened with you being all cool last time?! "'Ready to have that glass of strawberry milk'"? Ready my ass!"

"Are you guys' idiots?" Kagura cuts in. "Why are you two getting so worked up for? It's just strawberry milk." Kagura stands up off the Yoshiwara bench, a piece of sunboku in her mouth.

"Just strawberry milk? Strawberry milk is a way of life! It's just like Golem and his ring! It's my PRECIOUS thing!" Gintoki screams passionately.

"I thought every guys' precious thing was their joysticks." Kagura says in confusion.

"No, we protect our joysticks like a middle school boy protects the secret of his virginity from everyone." Gintoki says with a confident nod.

"Gin- san…" Shinpachi scolds. "You shouldn't say those things to a little girl. Besides, aren't you a virgin also?" Shinpachi falls back suddenly as a sake cup hits him between the eyes.

"Ah!" Kagura exclaims. "Shinpachi's bleeding!"

"Would you keep it down?!" Tsukuyo screams, walking into the room. "You're bothering the customers!"

"What are we bothering? Their **** time?" Gintoki retorts.

Before Tskuyo can say anything a gentle voice interrupts her.

"Gin- san, please keep it down." Hinowa orders gently.

Gintoki sighs. "Yeah…"

Tsukuyo glares at him. "You listen to her and not to me?!"

Gintoki raises an eyebrow. "You're a gorilla, not a woman."

"What?!" Tsukuyo exclaims.

"Tsukuyo, please calm down." Hinowa says quietly. She smiles at Gintoki. "Gin- san, if you don't quit it, I'll beat you to within an inch of your life."

"I take it back, she's a gorilla…" Gintoki mumbles.

"By the way, Gin- san." Shinpachi starts, sitting up. "Are you okay?"

"Fine…" Gintoki says with a sigh. He raises an eyebrow at Shinpachi's glasses. "I just noticed you're a full Shinpachi now."

"My glasses are not me!" Shinpachi screams.

"Yeah, yeah…" Gintoki says rubbing the back of his neck. He yawns, standing up. "I'm going back home… I'm really tired." He turns smiling at Shogun. "Maybe next time you can actually try strawberry milk."

Shogun laughs. "Maybe…"

Gintoki nods, walking out of the small shop.

Tskuyo turns to Hinowa. "You can never tell what he's thinking."

Hinowa smiles. "I think it's better that way… Makes him more heroic, don't you think Tsukuyo?"

Tsukuyo's eyes widen her face a bright red. "N-No!"

Shinpachi and Kagura smile at each other knowingly. "He's just a lazy ass." They say together.

"Elizabeth… I told you… I NEED SHAMPOO!" Katsura screams. "This is conditioner!"

There's a swish as Elizabeth raises the sign. "They were out of the shampoo you wanted."

"Then you should have got a different one!" Katsura exclaims.

Elizabeth's body twitches, grabbing a sign he throws it at Katsura, smacking him in the face.

Katsura rubs his face in pain. "Elizabeth!" He yells, glaring at him.

Elizabeth now emanating a dark aura points at the sign.

Katsura looks down at the sign that read. "Get it yourself then, you deadbeat!"

Katsura sighs. "Why do you have signs for everything?" Katsura raises an eyebrow as Elizabeth suddenly points at something behind him. "What are you pointing at?" Katsura's eyes widen as he sees the figure walking towards them. He had a long cloak, the hood obscuring his features.

Katsura blinks slowly. That person… He walked as if he could control the world. Arrogant. You could feel the power emanating from him. Katsura's breathing stops as the person passes, time seeming to slow. Katsura's eyes widen even more as the hood is lifted slightly, a smirk on the man's face. A smirk that could kill.

As the person walks away Katsura lets out a choking noise as oxygen rushes back into his lungs.

"E-Elizabeth…" Katsura didn't know if it was a question or just so he could feel that someone was with him right now. It felt like he was the only one on the street with that man. The rest of the world was gone.

Elizabeth quickly holds up a sign. "That man… he's scary Katsura- san."

Katsura nods slowly. "Yeah… he is…"

Gintoki shakes his head slowly. All of them. They're all dead. Blood. It was everywhere. His friends. That's all he could see, all of them dead. Bloodied corpses.

Gintoki takes a step forward only to fall to his knees. "How…" He whispers. "You guys… Don't leave me…" Gintoki mumbles. He sways slightly as if in a daze. "I just saw you guys… You can't be dead already."

"Aw, c'mon Gin- chan, you knew it would happen…" A familiar voice says cheerfully.

"Kagura!" Gintoki exclaims, looking around. He looks forward again, but only to fall back in surprise at the figure in front of him. He quickly smiles at the familiar black flats. "Kagura!" His eyes widen as the thing in front of him… was not Kagura. Where her always bright cheerful blue eyes were supposed to be were empty black sockets. "You're eyes…" Gintoki says quietly.

Kagura giggles. "What eyes Gin- chan?" She grins, trickles of blood starting to trail out of the empty sockets. Kagura giggles again. "Gin- chan, you're acting so weird. This was meant to happen. I mean, everyone that's with you dies."

Gintoki lets out a shuddering breath. This thing… It wasn't Kagura. This isn't real! No one's dead! Gintoki shakes his head his eyes dark. "Go away." He says evenly. "Get the hell away from me."

"That's just like you Gin- chan." Kagura says. "Always pushing people away so you can save the day. Well, don't you know that's the way we died?" She smiles. "He got us when you were trying to find him."

"Who…?" Gintoki asks carefully.

"Shiroyasha…" A voice whispers. "Shiroyasha, Shiroyasha, Shiroyasha, Shiroyasha." A chorus begins. Gintoki covers his ears.

"Shut up!" He screams.

"Shiroyasha."

Gintoki jumps as he feels this one next to him, like it was in his mind.

"Gintoki…" A ghostly voice whispers. The voice didn't seem like it was coming from a person. It was in the air, everywhere. "Why'd you leave us Gintoki? You left us for dead. You were supposed to protect us right?"

Gintoki starts to shake as he turns slowly, his breathing coming to a stop. His eyes widen, there all lined up in a row, were his friends. Friends from the war. "You're not real!" Gintoki screams.

"We'll always be real Gintoki." They say together. "Real to you. None of your friends know that your pain was great. And… they'll never get to know."

Gintoki looks forward to find that Kagura's not there. He shakes his head. "I need to wake up…"

"How can you wake up?" A voice says.

Gintoki's eyes widen as the cloaked figure walks towards him. The figure smiles, showing his sharp canines. "How can you wake up Gintoki? This isn't a dream." He grins, his blood filled eyes bright. "This is your future."

Gintoki lets out a scream, jumping off his futon. He backs up quickly, hitting the wall. He coughs, trying to catch his breath.

Gintoki shakes his head, sighing. "That was… weird." He whispers.

"Shinpachi, do you really think Gin- chan is okay?" Kagura asks.

Shinpachi sighs. "I don't know… He usually goes off on his own after fights, but this one seems different."

Kagura nods. "Yeah, it feels like I left the rice cooker on."

"What the hell are you talking about?!" Shinpachi screams. He sighs in apprehension. "Stop saying useless things."

"Everything we say is useless." Kagura mutters.

"That's true, but… Ah!" Shinpachi exclaims as he hits something hard. "I'm sorry." Shinpachi says, looking up.

"S-Shinpachi…" Kagura whispers.

Shinpachi and Kagura eyes widen as the figure smiles. His sharp canines exposed.

"Captain!" Abuto screams.

"What?!" Kamui yells.

"Stop eating so much!"

"I'm starving you dumbass!" Kamui screams.

"This is a public diner! Shut up!" The cook behind the counter screams.

Kamui sighs, setting the chopsticks on the table filled with empty rice bowls, leaning back in the booth. "I hate earth diners. Anywhere else in the universe, screaming in a diner is required."

Abuto smirks. "Yeah, but all you cared about were the fights there."

Kamui chuckles. "Those were boring… They were all so weak. There needs to be a real fight soon."

"We just had a real fight!" Abuto exclaims.

"Ha! That was nothing!" Kamui scoffs.

"Like hell that was nothing! I almost died! I would've if Ryouta didn't help me!"

"That just means you're getting soft." Kamui retorts.

"Yeah…" Abuto mutters sarcastically.

Kamui smiles. "Yep!" Kamui looks back over at the counter. "More rice!" He demands.

"You've had enough!" Abuto screams.

"S-Shinpachi…" Kagura whispers.

"I-I'm sorry…" Shinpachi says again, unable to look away from the man.

Kagura's eyes narrow. She grabs Shinpachi's arm, pulling him a few steps back. The man's smile widens, showing that his canines weren't the only ones sharp.

"Who are you…?" Kagura asks quietly.

The man pulls back his arm, bending his fingers.

"Shinpachi!" Kagura screams, throwing him to the ground.

The man jumps forward, grabbing Kagura by the throat, swinging her around. Kagura gasps, as her oxygen is cut off. The man chuckles, adding pressure ever so slowly. Kagura tries to scratch at the man's arms to no avail.

"Kagura!" Shinpachi screams, running to jump on the man's back, but he kicks back, hitting Shinpachi square in the chest, sending him into a shop with a loud crash.

Kagura rolls her head back as spots spread across her eyes. The man smiles, squeezing harder. Suddenly the man's body jolts. He drops Kagura, her body hitting the ground in a coughing mess.

Ryouta jumps in the air, his fist raised. "You son of a bitch!" He screams. He lands, swinging his fist, the man dodging. "What are you doing here?! What do you want with these two?!"

The man stands straighter, looking into Ryouta's eyes. He shakes his head.

Ryouta raises an eyebrow. "You're not here for them? Then what are you here for?!"

The man grins, his teeth that of a shark's. He runs forward in a blink of an eye. Ryouta having no time to react is punched in the face. He skids back, but only to fall back in a heap.

Kagura opens one dazed eye, breathing hard. "N-No way…" She whispers. Kagura gasps as the man looks back down at her. The man, still grinning, reaches down to grab her throat again.

Kagura squeezes her eyes shut. "Gin- chan…" She whispers.

The man stops, standing straight again. He looks over his shoulder, turning completely around.

Gintoki stands there, his wooden sword against his shoulder. He stares at the man with a bloodthirsty glare. "What the hell are you doing?" He asks menacingly, walking forward. The man smiles, tilting his head. Gintoki grits his teeth in anger, sprinting forward. "I asked you something asshole!" He screams. He swings his sword forcefully. His eyes widen as the sword doesn't hit its supposed target.

The man smirks as Gintoki tries to pull the sword out of the man's grasp to no avail.

"What the hell…" Gintoki mutters, gritting his teeth as he tugs harder.

"Gintoki…" The man whispers. Gintoki's eyes widen as the man's voice was… riveting. It's as if everything was just in his voice. His pain… and his happiness. "Sakata Gintoki… Do you know what's so similar about a sword and a soul?" The elder tilts his head slowly. "They break so easily…" He whispers.

Before Gintoki can react the man uses his other hand, smashing the sword with his hand. He grips the piece he was holding, swinging it forward, digging it into Gintoki's chest. Releasing his grip on the sword piece the man smiles at the bright crimson in his hands in fascination.

Gintoki blinks, looking down slowly as if in a daze. The man smirks, grabbing the piece, ripping it out of Gintoki's chest. All Gintoki can do is stare as the blood erupts out of his chest. He coughs, bringing up his hand to cover his mouth. Bringing his hand back, he stares at the blood covering it.

"Huh…?"

Authors Note: Hola! Buenos Noches! Haha, well I'll start off with a sorry. Sorry if the dream scene was a little… graphic… Well actually I'm not sorry I think Gintama needs a little… scary. Well, Gintoki in rage mode is scary enough. But… I think I needed to add a dream scene sometime into this story. Oh yeah, the scene with Katsura and Elizabeth happened in the beginning of an episode. (Not the same though of course, but similar.) It was the same with him wanting Elizabeth to get him shampoo, but Elizabeth gets him conditioner. SO YEAH, see you guys next time. Which hopefully will be sooner(;