Our Hell Broke Loose !

Read teh crack. READ EETTTT !

Don't own FMA. If I did, Envy would be dressed in a pudding costume.

"C-COLONEL!"

Roy jumped up from his paperwork, clutching his trusty marshmellow gun close. This was the first time Edward had called him by his title...something was up. Very up. Up like the sky, even.

Fuery popped out from under the desk with a radio, earning himself a marshmellow to the ear.

"OH NO! HE GOT ME! TELL-TELL MY MOM I LOVE HER AND-AND TELL MR. FLUFFLES IM SORRY!"

"Fuery."

"TAKE MERCY ON ME, I'M SORRY MR. MUSTANG!"

"Fuery."

"I'LL PUT ON A MINISKIRT IF IT PLEASES YOU!"

Roy stopped at that one. Hmm...miniskirts..

Suddenly Fuery pressed a button and the lights dimmed, causing the Jaws theme to come from some carefully located speakers that Roy congratulated himself on installing, even though he didn't know what a speaker was..

Fuery sidled up to the Colonel, blushing furiously. (1) "Look down!" he hissed.

Roy looked down.

FUERY WAS IN A MINISKIRT! "Not bad.." Roy mumbled, checking Fuery's womanly legs out. Much nicer than that big yellow guy he slept with.

"Oh my Gate."

"Sir?"

"I SLEPT WITH FARKING ARMSTRONG!"

While Roy fell into the floor, anguished and crying about jellyfish, Edward burst into the room looking equally terrified.

"MUSTANG! OUR HELL BROKE LOOSE!"

Roy jumped up, grabbed a tutu, did a ballerina twirl, and then became shocked.

"WHAT HAPPENED? DETAILS FULLMETAL I WANT DETAILS!" Roy slammed his sparkly hand down on the desk intending to sound manly and bastardly but really he sounded like a ballerina.

Oh, yeah..

Edward stopped hopping like a bunny for a minute and appraised Roy. "Colonel, did you give Armstrong a handjob?"

"What! FULLMETAL, WASN'T HELL BREAKING LOOSE?" Roy screamed, turning a funny color of tomato and changing the subject, like a boss.

"No! OUR HELL BROKE LOOSE."

"Fullmetal. Its 'all', not 'our.'"

"No, Roy, LOOK!" Edward fished around in his pocket and whipped out a chain and collar, engraved with the word "Hell."

"Aww shit..."

"Told ya our Hell broke loose."

Fuery looked outside the window in time to see a dog with red gleaming eyes eating the Fuhrer's nose.

"I think we learned a valueable lesson today." A mysterious voice said, falling from the light to land beside a still-sparkly Roy.

"Black Hayate! YOU TALK?"

"Nope. But anyway, I came to tell you something. When hell breaks loose...SPARKLE!"

The three humans went off to get hugs from none other than Alex Louis Armstrong.

Haha. I've always wondered about naming my dog hell..

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(1)- Fuery blushed furiously. Get it? Lol. I make da funnay.

Till next time !

~FullMetalCrayon~