Chapter Two: Quit Playing Games

He didn't want to talk about it, didn't even want anyone to bring it up in conversation or hear it while passing by an open door. This was his first day back on the job and he'd panicked. No doubt somewhere in the lab someone was talking about him, making him look bad and having a laugh at his expense. He closed his eyes, leaning against his locker. The metal felt cool against his forehead but with his eyes closed he could feel nothing beyond the slight pain in his hands. Alexx had been too kind to treat them and wrap them in bandages. She kept her mouth shut about what happened, talking to him instead about the victims. After that he'd headed over to the locker room to grab a few things before heading out. He was done for the night. Technically they all were; the state had become pretty picky about overtime and even though the case involved friends of the mayor there was nothing they could do until the morning. An all points bulletin had been placed on the still missing father. Speed figured that none of the blood at the crime scene would match the MIA dad. He was beginning to think that maybe the father had something to do with it…

A minute later he sat on wooden bench running between the rows of lockers, a hand on his chest. The phantom pain had returned. It had been with him since leaving the crime scene behind for safer territory within the confines of the lab. And as he thought about the pain in his chest he pictured himself back in that living room with the glass exploding around him, the panic making his heart race. None of his friends had been aware that he was suffering from the occasional anxiety attack. They sure knew it now. But they still didn't know about his night terrors and he planned to keep them a secret as long as possible. He'd shown enough weakness for one day. From where he sat he reached out and popped open his locker. He pulled out his coat and checked the pockets but did not find what he was looking for. Standing, he ran a hand along the top shelf, again failing to find what it was that he sought. Frustrated he slammed the locker door shut and sat heavily on the bench.

"Looking for these?" someone asked, holding an orange plastic prescription bottle out to him.

He looked up and into the blue eyes of his boss. "Yeah…where did you get them?" he asked, taking the bottle of pain medication.

"Found them on the floor amongst the glass," Horatio said as he sat beside Speed. "I thought that maybe you would need them." A moment of silence passed between them. "I didn't know you were on medication."

"Just pain pills," Speed was quick to say.

Worry clouded Horatio's eyes. "You're in pain?"

"Every now and then," he said, looking away. He was unable to look at his boss, his mind going back to the crime scene. It had only been the two of them when he got shot months ago and Horatio had been the one to comfort him, the one that kept him hanging on until help arrived. Today they both got a scare, reliving that day all over again. Of course the two of them would panic, it was only natural. But the last thing Speed expected was to find himself wrapped in his boss's embrace. He and Horatio were close, had been friends and colleagues for years now, but they'd never been in such a…he closed his eyes. "Some days, the pain is so bad that I don't want to get out of bed. The doctor gave me medication to help but it doesn't always work. My psychologist seems to believe it's a phantom pain; that my body keeps reliving that day."

"Speed…"

He smiled. "Don't worry. I can do my job, H. I'm fit as a fiddle and healthy, just ask my doctor."

Now it was Horatio that smiled, though somewhat sadly. "I wouldn't doubt it in a million years but…you froze. I can let it slide this one time. If it happens again I'll have to report it officially and they put you through tests to make sure you can still do your job."

"You're not going to say anything?" Speed was surprised.

"Nope," Horatio said as he stood. "The body isn't the only thing that needs time to heal, Tim."

Having parted ways with Horatio he found himself walking down the nearly empty halls toward the elevator that would take him to the ground floor. He just wanted to hop on his motorcycle and leave the lab behind. Tomorrow would be a better day, or so he kept telling himself. He made a pit stop at the break room to grab a bottle of water out of the fridge. Back in the hall he popped the cap off the bottle of medication and dumped out a pill. The little white object helped to take away the pain that he wasn't sure was really there at all. Popping the pill in his mouth he chased it down with a swig of refreshing water. He was about to put the bottle of medication back in his pocket when he ran into someone wearing a white lab coat. The bottle fell from his grasp, slipping free of his hold and landing on the floor. Before he could bend over to pick it up the lab tech did, clearly reading the lab.

Speed looked at the guy and realized that he didn't know him. "Sorry," he muttered in apology. "Can I have those back?" He indicated the bottle.

The lab tech raised his eyebrows. "Timothy Speedle…hey, you're the guy that freaked out at the crime scene when some dude opened fire. I hear you screamed like a little girl."

"Can I have my property back?" Speed asked, ignoring the barbs of the tech.

"I could," the guy said, tossing the bottle back and forth, from one hand to the other. "Where would the fun be in that, though? Why don't you tell me all about the little incident at the crime scene, maybe it would make you feel better?" The guy's voice took on a whiny tone like he was talking to a child. "Rumor has it that you ended up in the arms of a man. Is little Speedle-wheedle—"

The guy never got a chance to finish his sentence. Delko had been coming down the hallway when he noticed that one of the techs was taunting someone. He had a fairly good idea who was the joke of the conversation and it made his blood boil. He never cared for the tech standing in front of him. Something about the guy didn't sit right with him and it probably had to do with the way he treated people. Being a good scientist couldn't make up for a lack of manners or respect. As he drew closer he heard more and more of the conversation. It angered him. So when he was within distance he gave the guy a good shove to the side. The tech nearly lost his balance but managed to stay on his feet. Try as he might he couldn't keep a firm hold on the object in his hand. Before he could retrieve it Delko grabbed what he now saw was a prescription bottle. He glared at the lab tech.

"Get lost or Horatio's going to find out about this and you'll be out of a job."

The guy made an obscene gesture before walking away. Speed shook his head. "How does someone like that get a job here and keep it?"

Delko smiled. "Worry not; I have it on good authority that he'll be gone by the end of the week. I think just about everybody has put in a complaint about him. He shouldn't be a problem anymore." He handed the bottle back to Speed without even looking at it. Whatever medication Speed was taking for whatever problem was none of his business. If it was important he knew that Speed would tell him in due time. "How about we got out and get something to drink before heading home?"

"I can't have alcohol," Speed said, putting the bottle in his pocket.

"I was talking about sodas anyway," Delko said. He put his arm around Speed's shoulder and they continued walked toward the elevator. "With such a high profile case I don't plan to touch an ounce of alcohol until it's over. I mean, come on, the family was on good terms with the mayor. Now that's a man you don't risk pissing off."

"If it's only soda, okay," Speed accepted the invitation. But in the back of his mind he wondered if it was the right thing to do.