DA:O and all characters belong to Bioware. Plz review and tell me how horrible this is plz *heart*
"What?"
The guard standing in front of the Gate grunted, turning his attention towards the meagerly dressed red-haired elf that had spoken. He sneered at her, making his distaste for her known. "You heard me, knife-ear. The rest of your worthless kin revolted. They say one of the blighters killed the old Arl's son. The New Arl has closed the district until order can be restored."
"Revolted?" "Revolted?" "Oh maker, it's all my fault!" "The.. Ban's son?" The elf's voice was but a squeak. "It's all my fault its all my fault..Shianni, Soris, father, Valendrian.." "Maker..."
Dimly she was aware of Alistair clearing his throat, "Come now, Tatiana, if the guard says the Alienage is closed, then you will just have to pick up your things another time." He turned to the guard and muttered out one side of his mouth, "Good help is so hard to find these days."
The guard chuckled and nodded his head, "Sometimes its a real shame we ain't allowed to just kill'm and be done with it."
Every hair on her body not tied back in a leather strip was standing on end, and her vision went red. Before she could open her mouth to tell the dirty, stupid shem off, she felt herself being led away.
"Come now, Tatiana, I need to get settled in at the inn before I simply drop dead of exhaustion! Johan, please take my things to the Gnawed Noble!" The smooth voice of the Orleasian bard picked up right where it should have, and Asyla felt a pat on her hand as the taller woman lead her towards the tavern.
Asyla did her very best to breath. Breath and try not to be overwhelmed with guilt. She wasn't doing a very good job of it. Her mind kept running, even though her body was on auto pilot. Tears swam in her eyes, the color red blurring the edges of her vision.
"It's all my fault. If I hadn't killed Vaughan... maybe I should have taken the money he offered? No, because then he would have hurt Shianni more... but, maybe she's dead and.."
"Maker..." she breathed, the words sticking to her throat as the hot tears spilled over and onto her cheeks.
Alistair was giving the inn keeper... something, she couldn't see what. She didn't really care either. Over and over her mind she replayed the images of her family and friends. Had what she done really doomed them? What was going on behind the gate? Could she find a way to sneak in and find out? Would it do them any good if she was waiting her time here instead of saving Thedas from the blight?
Someone was leading her toward a chair. She was sitting, and she could hear a door close. A pair of soft lips were brushing against her forehead. Zevran, his sent invading her mind momentarily before returning to its utter state of guilt. Tears fell more freely, and she trembled against the back of the chair she was now sitting in. Her hands were in her lap, balled up into petite fists.
"La-la, what's going on. Talk to us." Alistair's voice seemed far away, and exhausted. He really should be resting, she thought absently, mid impossible to fully take breath. Why was it so hard to breath, anyway? Her chest felt tight, and her breath was coming in small puffs. Each one was more difficult, and the room around her was starting to spin.
"Easy, easy my dear. Come, tuck your head between your knees and take slow, even breaths. There we go.. that's It. Good girl." Zevran purred, a hand rubbing at the back of her neck as he spoke. It must have been his hand, because Alistair was pacing in front of her. She did as he advised, taking slow, deep breaths. Anything to calm the rage and desperation trying to crush her heart.
"Alistair, why don't you go out and ask for some wine. I think we may need it before this evening is over." Leliana's thickly accented voice floated over Asyla's ears. With a sigh, and the shift of plate armor, Alistair slid out of the room.
She concentrated on breathing for a little while. In through the nose, out through the mouth. The tension in her neck was sliding away with each moment that Zevran's deft hands were there. Leliana was humming, the soothing tone of her voice helping to calm the panic attack before it could fully manifest itself inside her.
What good friends I have.
The click of the door closing gave Alistair's return away. He knelt in front of her, giving her his very best "Ali-clown" smile. "Here La-la, drink this. It will help."
She took the cup, drinking the heady, sweet wine slowly. When she came up from the cup for air, the three of them were just standing there, watching her. A shiver crept down her spine. She did her best to smile back, knowing what a horrid mess she must look.
"I.. I'm sorry Ali, I should have warned you.. "
"Warned me of what, La-la? That humans are almost worse the darkspawn sometimes? I already knew that. Raised by the chantry, remember?" he chuckled, his smile lighting up his whole face. It also lightened the weight of the situation trying to cave her chest in.
"That I'm the one who killed Bann Urial's son."
"Well.. he probably had it coming, if he was anything like that guard out there." He continued, lightheartedly.
She could kiss him, right then, "He did. He raped my cousin, among other more or less equally horrible things."
"Maker.. well then he definitely deserved it." He grinned lopsidedly at her as he spoke. His hands were suspiciously metal-free, and they were resting on her knees.
"Alistair, my good man. Why don't we let these fine ladies rest, and we go in search of this Genitalia fellow about the dead-woman dust everyone believes will cure your Arl Eamon." Zevran drawled thickly in the ex-Templar's direction. His hands never moved from her shoulders and neck.
"Hmm, seems like a good idea. Leli can handle what ever might happen here while La gets a bit of rest. Once we have some information, we'll come back and make a devious and dastardly plan to break into the Alienage." Alistair was eyebrow waggling at her, and it made her chuckle lightly.
"Promise?" She muttered halfheartedly. There was no way they were going to get in there before the guard opened the gates. Asyla knew the layout of Denerim better then any of the rest of their group. The only way in or out of the Alienage was by bridge or by boat. They had neither, and they had a blight to contend with. No, what ever had happened to her home would have to wait. Even if it was her fault.
"Cross my heart."
Zevran grimaced as they exited the tavern, the brightness of the day causing him to squint. He heard Alistair take a deep breath beside him. "Best bet is to head over to the chantry and ask the sisters where Brother Genitive's house is. If anyone would know, they would."
"Hmm, lead on then, my good man," Zevran chuckled. He was still wearing the squire's clothing, but his daggers were now safely tucked away into hidden pockets for easy accessibility. Better to have them and irritate the guards, then to be attacked and find himself with out them.
The two walked along quietly, Zevran mulling over the reaction Asyla had when she found out that Arl Howe had purged her home. He didn't blame her, had it been his family he might have just reacted in that same manner. Alas, his upbringing was as different from hers as even Alistair's. He understood very much what it had been like for her, being an elf. That didn't mean he understood what it felt like to have family you cared for.
Alistair's voice pulled him from his thoughts,"So let me ask you something. What are your intentions with her?" The question seemed out of the blue, but he suspected that the boy had been mulling over it for some time.
"Her? You speak of her as if she is not a person. She will be most displeased to discover this, you know... "
Alistair sighed heavily. He stopped moving, turning his attention fully on Zevran. "Don't dodge the question. I'm serious."
Zevran curled his lips into a mischievous smile. He could hear the jealousy behind the words of the taller, younger man. "How adorable," he thought to himself. Out loud, he replied, "Is this brotherly concern I detect? Or something else? Perhaps you are concerned for me, yes?", and the growing smirk only grew wider with his next words, "Or perhaps you are.. jealous?"
Alistair's cheeks went red, which only amused Zevran that much more. "I.. I am just asking what your intentions are. You did try to kill us all, remember?"
He continued to look up at the taller man, musing at the impressive cover. Oh, he was determinately jealous. It only made this whole thing that much more fun. "And now I owe her a blood debt, as she has spared my life. It has brought us... closer together."
Alistair's face paled for a moment, but seemed to recover quickly enough. His next words caused a laugh to escape Zevran's curled mouth. "Is that a smirk? Are you smirking at me?"
Alistair was staring incredulously at him. It made the laughter bubble up again. The poor lad. "I assure you, ser, that I am not smirking. No smirking here, no."
Alistair sighed, glaring daggers at him. The taller man would be imposing, if Zevran were the type to be scared by big and bulky. Alas, he was not. Instead he continued to grin at the blond ex-Templar as if he were the cat and the current "object" of their conversation was the crème.
The two of them stared daggers-and-smirks at each other for a moment or two more, but Alistair gave in first. The taller man sighed, continuing towards the chantry. "Well, just... watch yourself, then. I'll be keeping an eye on you."
Alistair walked with Zevran towards the chantry, his mind raging over the conversation between them. The smaller man had not backed down, much to his irritation. The whole situation was driving him insane. Why would a woman as smart and beautiful as Asyla want anything to do with the obnoxious assassin? Void, the only reason she'd even let him live was because Leliana had insisted!
He clenched his jaw, grinding his teeth against each other. He was an idiot. He should have made his feelings known to her before then. He should have just told her. Maybe he still should. What would it hurt, except maybe his pride? He'd thought there had been a bond between them. Sure she hadn't been very warm to him at first, but she'd eventually came around to his charms.
Or so he thought. After Zevran had joined them, he'd noticed a distinct drawing away from the woman. She'd been opening up, relaxing around him, even smiling. He'd been daring, silly, even flirty with her, and she'd flirted right back. Every time she smiled, his heart felt as if it were going to break open his chest and run away.
Once Zevran came, the warm smiles and lighthearted flirting had stopped. At first she hadn't given them to the painted elf, either. It was as if having another elf at camp was nothing but a stark reminder of just how very different she was in comparison to the rest. This bothered Alistair. Didn't she know that the shape of your ears had nothing to do with the person you were inside?
They'd finally reached the chantry, and being that he wasn't the one dressed like a servant, it was made perfectly evident that he'd have to do the talking. He pushed his thoughts to the side for a moment and put on his best Alistair smile.
"Excuse me, sister. I apologize for interrupting your... interesting take on the Chant of light." He mused, having just witnessed the older of the two women making a comment about, "The peas of Andraste." The younger of the two women sighed heavily, and looked as if she would like nothing else then to throttle the older one.
"Greetings, Ser. Please don't apologize. We were just about to go to lunch, I believe" the older woman replied, her smugness a stark reminder of why exactly he was so utterly grateful to Duncan for getting him out of the Chantry's grasp.
"Yes well. I am looking for a bit of information. Could either of you kind sisters tell me where Brother Genitive's home might be? I've an urgent message from Redcliff that must be delivered. My information tells me only that it is somewhere within the market district."
"Ah, yes. I had heard that the Arl of Redcliff had our dear brother working on something magnificent. He lives just across the way from the Gnawed Noble Tavern, if I remember correctly. The brother does enjoy his spirits now and again." This garnered a groan from the younger of the two women, but the older just smiled, apparently oblivious to the faux pas.
"Thank you very much. Sister, Sister." He smiled his best dazzling handsome young man smile, and bowed to each lady as if they were the queen themselves. The elder woman giggled, which caused the younger to sigh dramatically.
The pair turned and headed back towards the tavern. "Well, that was a waste of energy, truly. We could have done better if we'd just knocked on doors near the tavern for all that effort." Zevran was smirking again, and Alistair did his very best not to turn around and hit him. One more time, he found himself wondering what, exactly it was that his La-la saw in the Antivan elf.
"Did you really murder the man?" Leliana peered curiously out at her from behind the sheer curtain of red hair spilling over her face as she buckled the last of her leathers into place.
Asyla sighed, pulling her own shoulder-length strawberry hair into it's comfortable pony tail. She always kept it up while fighting, but had opted to wear it down when playing the roll of handmaiden. "Easier to hide your face behind so no one recognized you" her mind mused.
"Yes. He deserved it. He was the literal meaning of the word Shem. My cousin Shianni is 16, almost 17 now. Soris and I did our maker damned best to keep her away from some of the harder bits of life here, and that no good dirty no good.."
"Hmm, sounds as if you cannot think of a swear bad enough." Leliana snickered, helping the smaller woman clasp some of the harder to reach clasps.
"Exactly. Zev told me once, that some people just need assassinating. It's not wrong. Some people don't deserve to have the gift of life. Especially not people like Vaughan. What he did to Shianni.." Asyla intentionally left out the bit about Nelaros and being almost married. She trusted the bard, but it was almost a more personal failure then allowing her baby cousin to be raped. She wasn't ready to share that with anyone, other then Zevran. Nelaros had been a good man. She could tell that, even now. A good man with no more ambition then to be married and have a family, to carry on the traditions asked of all of them. That she'd let him die when she could have, should have, saved his life..
Leliana's voice brought her back to the real world, and she abandoned her previous thoughts as quickly as they'd been invoked. It wasn't something she had time to dwell on. It seemed that Leliana wanted to change the subject, as well. "So.. you and Zevran.."
She felt a blush creep up on her, and she did her very best to fend it off. "What about Zevran and I?"
"Well, I mean.. you two are pretty loud you know. I think Alistair was trying to eat his own ears last night. You might want to tone it down a little bit. I think he might have a crush on you.. "
"...what."
Leliana laughed. A full, real laugh that caused the woman to flop onto the decorative couch and hold her sides. "Oh La-la you are just to adorable. I could just wrap you up in a box and keep you forever."
Asyla's mind was, well, blank. She just couldn't wrap her mind around the idea of Alistair having a crush on her. It wasn't something she'd bothered to consider. Why would he have a crush on her? That didn't make any sense. She was an elf, and he was a bastard-prince!
"D... doya.. do'ya really think he does?"
"La-la! I am ashamed! Such scandalous thoughts!" Leliana laughed, winking at the smaller girl.
"What! I .. I just didn't think he would like some one like me. You definitely seem more his speed, Leli. All chantry.. and.. legs.." She looked down at Leliana's long, slender legs.
"Asyla Tabris, you are quite beautiful in your own right, you know! Just because your legs aren't quite as long as mine means very little! You are.. petite!"
"..Petite? Thanks, Leli. Why don't you just call me a piece of wood and wound my pride farther."
"Oh La-la. You're NOT a plank of wood. If anything, your stature is endearing. You've plenty of curve in that tight little body of yours, dear. You're an elf. You can hardly expect to be built like a human. That doesn't mean you're not attractive.." and Asyla could suddenly swear that Leliana was blushing, now.
She felt a new blush creep over her, and she bit her tongue before she did something horrible like insulting her friend. Not that the very idea wasn't intriguingly scary in its own right, but other women just wasn't her favorite choice for sheet romps. Plus, shem... not that Leli was a shem... "Andraste's great flaming knickers.." she muttered to herself, putting a embroidered pillow over her face.
That prompted another laugh from Leliana. Were all of her companions going to be hitting on her at some point? "Great, do I suddenly have to worry that Wynne's motherly advice is just a way to get me naked?" she muttered into the pillow, and then swore at herself for saying that out loud. What one void of a day it was turning out to be.
She pulled the pillow away from her face, and sighed. "Alright, so.. Alistair has a crush on me.. and I'm sleeping with Zevran, who I have no idea if he actually likes me at all other then for amazing, and oh maker it really is, sex."
"This is what I've observed, yes." Leli twinkled at her, and that look on top of the whole situation being lain at her feet made her laugh.
"I wonder what Alistair'd be like.. maker, have you SEEN him with out his armor on? All muscles and.. ."
"Mmh, he is quite attractive. Sometimes I wonder if he'd kill me I asked him if I could "Kitty paw" his abs. Maker.." Leliana was blushing again, fanning herself with a single hand as only a dramatic Orleasian could. Asyla had to agree. The idea of straddling Alistair's chiseled hips and kneading her palms and fingertips into those abs...
"Not to say that Zevran isn't well built himself. He's more.. lithe though. Not all sinew and bulk like Alistair. Lanky, even, yes?"
"Maker, you've no idea. You can barrow him any time you'd like Leli. Seriously. The man is so...agile." It was about the best word she could find to describe Zevran.
"Hmm, I think this calls for a bet."
"A bet?" Asyla rose a single eyebrow at the taller woman, her grin wide with mischief. "What kind of bet?"
"Well... you're already sleeping with Zevran. But.. why not see if you can get Alistair to sleep with you as well. Then, you can tell me all about it so that I can live vicariously through you." Leliana was grinning deviously.
"but.. why not just go after him yourself, Leli? I mean I'm sure you could talk anyone you wanted into bed. Besides, I'm not even sure I could. Zevran was easy because he was trying to get me into the tent with him from the moment you insisted we spare his life. But.. "
"but what?"
"Well, I'm not exactly good at this stuff you know. I wasn't a virgin or anything, but I've never.. seduced anyone before, you know?"
Leliana laughed, her arms going around her sides with the force of it. "Oh La-la. You are better at it then you've given yourself credit for. You have both of those men scrambling for your attention. Even Sten likes you, although I do not believe its in the same way. Maker I hope not, with what I overheard when Morrigan propositioned him."
"What." Asyla blinked a few times, both her eyebrows trying to disappear in her hairline.
"You heard me! She walked up, well sauntered since that seems to be the only way she knows how to walk. Like some grand seductress. And she asked him to bed her. He just laughed and told her that should he do that, she'd need to wear Alistair's armor. The rest, well.. lets just say that Morrigan was put in her place for the first time in her life. It was amusing to witness, if I do say so myself." Leliana mused, grinning from ear to ear.
"About time. I totally get that she's into power and everything, but a little bit of humbling will go really far in curbing the sour attitude. None of us had super stellar childhoods or anything. It's not as if growing up free to roam the wilds and use her magic freely is a utterly horrible way of living. Better then scrubbing chamber pots when you were 8 so your family could eat, or being some spoiled noble girl's personal dress up doll." She made the most sour face at that particularly fun memory.
"So, would you like to hear my terms?" Leliana was trying to bring the conversation back around to her bet. Asyla had hoped the bard had forgotten, but apparently this particular conversation wasn't one that Leli was willing to let go.
She groaned, pulling the pillow over her face again, "Alright, what are your terms."
Leliana grinned like a cat before it pounced on its catch, "You have until we get to Orzammar to get Alistair to sleep with you. If you do, If you fail then I .. will walk around Denerim stark naked the next time we're here."
"And If I do?"
"Well then you win, right? Because you'll have both of those men frothing at the mouth for you." she winked at her, and Asyla thought she was going to throw up or die, yes. Maybe die. Dieing sounded good.
You know what? Fuckit, why not. "You know what? Fuckit, why not. Alistair's not a bad guy, and he is cute, and those abs... what I wouldn't do to get my hands on those..."
Alistair was frozen, his hand positioned just above the door for a knock. He hadn't wanted to walk in on the ladies if they were dressing. Zevran had gone to speak with the inn keeper to secure the semi-permanent room for when they would return. It didn't matter, because he'd heard the words that wafted through the door, albeit muffled.
"..Alistair's not a bad guy, and he is cute. Plus, those abs.. what I wouldn't do to get my hands on those..."
Had he heard right? Asyla wanted to touch his abs? She thought he was cute? Why was the hallway spinning that way? He swallowed hard, trying to fight off the amazingly uncomfortable tightness in his armor that was threatening to show him all kinds of tasty images of Asyla running her bare hands, bare flesh, over his abs.
He struggled with his mind and his hormones for a few moments, trying desperately to push those delectable images out of his mind. Images if her writhing beneath him, whispering his name in her breathy devil-may-care voice. Images of her lithe, petite figure sitting atop his hips... They had a mission, and he needed to get the ladies moving.
He took a few more deep breaths, and shook his head. Once they moved out of the city and back to camp, he might just let himself entertain such thoughts. Such naughty, mouth wateringly wonderful thoughts..
"Are you just going to stand there all day, my good man, or are you going to let these women know that we are ready to leave?" Zevran's thick accent assaulted his ears, and he jumped, not expecting the roguish elf to knees up on him while his mind ran wild with images of the sexy elf on the other side of the door.
"I.. Uh.. yes."
Zevran raised a single tawny eyebrow at the taller man. "Yes? Are you feeling well, Alistair? Perhaps it is you who should be resting."
"I.. n-no I'm good. I just... You know what? Never mind, let's just get the girls and go." Alistair stumbled, knowing that even if Asyla had, licked the elf's lamp-post, as it were, that she'd been talking about him to Leliana, and not the elf. It gave him a sense of self-satisfaction to think that the assassin wasn't quite as good as he believed.