Dear Readers,

I apologize in advance. This is not a chapter to the story for which you have asked Fanfiction to alert you about. This is a special introduction to my first novel, Counting Stars, which will be on sale June 1, 2011 on . You will find the web links up on my fanfiction profile by that day. For all of you who have been reading my work, this is a thank you—the summary of the book, plus the first chapter. I hope you enjoy it! You will have the choice of buying either the paperback, hardcover, or Ebook version.

Sincerely,

Rose

"In the end, it's all the same, just like the stars in the sky."

Annabel Hartman holds horrible secrets in her heart; she is the sole caretaker of her brother Ryan, her mother's killer is still haunting her, and she has a predetermined destiny she can't escape.

Annabel believes she is meant to be alone.

However, after moving to a new town, she becomes friends with the Alderics, four brothers with a curse as terrible as her own.

They reveal to her that each of them have the power of an element; earth, water, fire, and wind.

Annabel is instantly welcomed into their world and she begins to let them into hers. But as she gets closer to the Alderics, she begins to believe that meeting them was a part of the destiny she never wanted.

Chapter 1

"If you aren't strong, you'll die."

I am cursed…

…I am destined to be alone.

What else could explain the life I have been given?

I am a monster after all; I don't deserve anything more than what I have.

Before me was the familiar, red punching bag; I took a deep breath and shut my eyes. I focused on every muscle in my body. I began to slowly flex each one from my arms to my ankles. I let my thoughts dull down to a soft murmur as I focused only on this one hit that I was going to make. I inhaled when…

"Annabel! We're going to be late!" With a frustrated grunt, I went in for one solid kick to the bag. My leg connected with a loud smack into the center of the sack. I heard the black, plastic bottom scrap across the floor and, soon afterward, the usual thud as it smacked against the wall. My fists tightened as I stared at the inanimate enemy.

"I don't want to be here," I told no one but myself. With a soft shrug and a quick shake of my head to get my bangs out of my eyes, I turned around and placed my black converse sneakers on. As I tied my shoes, my thoughts turned back on into a constant roar like they had been ever since we moved here, into this dumb, awful house.

Just two weeks ago, my brother and I had moved here to some small suburban town that people never heard about. The day my mother told me we were moving was on my sixteenth birthday two and a half months ago. Not long after that, my mother died, and my father became an alcoholic. My brother and I still moved here to this house, but we were pretty much orphans as Dad entered rehab to deal with the drinking, and mom was buried in the cemetery back home. At the moment, we were living off the checks our father sent us and someday soon, the money I would earn through my job at a local restaurant in town. Right now though, being here in a new world was not exciting, especially considering the circumstances that my brother and I were forced into. The only choice I had now was to make sure I could protect him, and make everything better for him. I wasn't too concerned with myself.

"Annabel!" I heard again. I snapped back into reality.

"I'm coming," I called back, a bit of anger in my tone, which I instantly regretted. I grabbed my backpack, an army green messenger bag, and ran up the stairs with an easy sprint. My bag hit against my leg the entire way up as my hand reached for the doorknob. When I opened the door to the main floor, I saw my younger brother standing there, looking right at me impatiently.

"Pop's will be mad if you put another dent in the wall." Ryan said with a grin that was only a mere lift at the corner of his lips. He fiddled with his black framed glasses. "And he did say we weren't supposed to be late for school on our first day." I sighed and ran a hand through my brown hair. Yeah, he said that before everything happened…I wondered what he would say now…

"I know," I huffed. Why did Ryan seem more responsible than me? "Let's go, we do have to walk after all." I placed an arm around my brother's shoulders. He was only a few inches shorter than me, and in time, I would assume he would outgrow me. With that sad thought, I led us out the door, shut it behind us, and headed down the steps.

Here, where we lived now, was nowhere near home. Home was better than this ever could be. The green grass, the white-picket fences, the clean sidewalks, and small trees weren't as free, open, or loving as the ones back where we used to be, my family and I. Here it was copies of the same house all lined up, paved roads instead of dirt, and prep schools that made us wear uniforms. "Annabel," my brother was only eleven years old and still, he was more of an adult than I was. "Everything will be okay. Mom would've liked it here, so why can't you like it too?"

I cringed at the acknowledgment. "I can't…because," my eyes drifted down to our feet taking each step slowly, one at a time, "Because, mom would've made this place okay. She's not here to do that." At least if she was still here, I could still have her, even if she didn't love me…At least, I'd feel like I had a purpose… I shook off my thoughts, knowing that it didn't matter if whether or not mom was here. I would still have my purpose.

"She did it for us, though," Ryan continued, "She did it because—," I clamped my hand over his mouth. We stopped walking as I kneeled down in front of him. I glared at him, with a cold stare that I wish I didn't have to use on him. My hand still pressed firmly against his lips.

"We never speak of it," I whispered harshly. "Never, do you understand me?" Ryan nodded his head. His brown eyes were filling up with tears already. I dropped my hand from his mouth, which was trembling now. A gust of wind brushed his brown hair in front of his eyes as I looked away from him and at the bottom of a white fence mixing in with the green grass, "I'm sorry. But you ought to know better." My secret is a secret for a reason.

"I know, but," Ryan was hesitant, careful, "We never talk of it, even when we should." I patted his shoulder, in a way, telling him that we would discuss it some other time in private. His shoulders sagged, and his eyes went down to the sidewalk to watch our moving feet. I lifted my eyes up to the perfect blue sky with the clouds lazily rolling along. I felt like I had entered a nightmare, and I was the monster in the center spotlight.

"Let's just," I sighed and once again ran my hand through my long waves of hair. "Let's just get through today, okay? And tell you what, I'll show you some new fighting moves for you to work on." A smile, a small one at that, appeared on my brother's face as he fixed his glasses.,"Now come on," I said, once again placing a protective arm over my brother's shoulders, "As your sister, I have to make sure you make it to your middle school orientation."

As it was, we were just walking on the way to Hawthorne, a private school not far from home, when we ran into them.

"You've got some nerve, you know that!" Both Ryan and I lifted our heads towards the sound. At the corner of the sidewalk where we would have to cross, a group of teens suddenly appeared. The one in the front looked a bit annoyed with his hands shoved in his pockets, and his eyes clamped shut. He was biting his bottom lip while mumbling to himself. He was dressed in the Hawthorne uniform like Ryan.

Just behind him, the other three walked, and by the looks of it, they were all related. They had the same chins, noses, and even black feathery hair. The tallest of them had his hand on the shoulder of the smallest. Assuming he was the oldest, I quickly noted his dark green shirt with a brown tie and tan dress pants with brown leather shoes. His hair went down to the small of his back and was flowing about in the wind. He was slightly glaring at the one in the front, but not in a mean way, just a frustrated way as if he was used to dealing with this.

"Honestly, you need to relax. I hate you too, but it's not like we need everyone to know," the voice was cold and smooth. It came from the second tallest boy, who was wearing the usual boy's uniform for Hawthorne too; a black vest with the crest, a white shirt and black tie, and black pants with black leather shoes. The youngest whose eyes were casted down on the ground also had the same clothing as his two brothers.

"Well!" The boy who was in front turned around to face them. His eyes were open now, and I was suddenly taken aback. Unlike the other three, whose eyes were all a deep forest green, his were a piercing blue that seemed too scary to be real. "I could care less. And what are you staring at?" Suddenly, his eyes were on my brother and me. Instinctively, I pushed Ryan behind me while I glared at him.

"Nothing special," I retorted with a snide. I felt myself glare again as the three other boys snickered at my response. The one who had yelled at me stood up straighter and turned to face me with a shocked expression on his face. "Let's go Ryan, I have to take you to orientation." I softly grabbed my brother's wrist and quickly moved past the boys. I was in no mood for social interactions with anyone.

As we crossed the street towards the tall, looming building of Hawthorne Prep, I heard the group of boys talking. Apparently, they were incapable of whispering.

"Aiden, that girl totally embarassed you!"

"SHUT UP!"

"That was interesting."

"I SAID, 'SHUT UP!'"

I shook my head and kept moving until we were out of earshot. "You weren't very nice." Shocked, I looked down at Ryan who was staring forward. "You could've been nicer. You don't always have to let your anger get the best of you." But my anger is all I have…

I huffed, "Well, it's hard, all right? Besides, it's not like it matters. In this school, I'll probably never see any of them again." We pushed through crowds of people as I followed the signs that pointed towards the auditorium. I felt myself get agitated as I held tight onto Ryan's wrist so as not to lose him.

Ryan sighed, "You'll never learn will you Annabel?" His eyes casted down to the ground, and his shoulders sagged. I could tell how disappointed he was in me. Then, he muttered again to me as he stood at my side, "You'll never learn what it means to have a friend, will you?"

Nope.

By then, I found the auditorium where all the seventh graders had to go for orientation with a legal guardian. Since my father was not available, the dean approved for me to take Ryan instead. Hawthorne Prep was two parts, a middle school and a high school, which meant Ryan and I had classes in the same building. "We're sitting back here." I led Ryan to the farthest corner of the auditorium, and we sat down. I placed my feet on the seat in front of me and crossed my arms. "I already hate it here."

Ryan sighed, "So easy to hate. So hard to love." Mom used to say the same exact thing when Ryan and I were younger.

I chose to ignore his statement and observed the room. There were two exits behind us on either side of the wide room. The seats were centered, and there were about twenty rows total. There was a stage set up, with a podium and microphone, and near it was a line of seats filled up with teachers. I shut my eyes and rested my head back, too frustrated to want to deal with any of this.

"Hello there," I jumped and lifted my head to see two of the boys that we had run into before. Up close now, I realized that the tall one had to be in his late-twenties or even early-thirties. He had a wide grin on his face as he pushed his long hair off his shoulder. "I'd thought this area would be empty. I'm not a fan of crowds, and I plan on sleeping. I've been to these already with my other brothers so…it gets quite repetitive by the second time." The smallest boy sat down next to Ryan and from behind the layers of long black hair, stared curiously.

"Who are you?" I demanded seeing as how, right now, these strangers were sitting next to my brother. My blood was boiling as I wondered how I could protect him in case of an attack. The older of the two smirked at me as if we were long lost friends and he was the only one who remembered.

"Annabel," Ryan whispered calmly, "You don't have to be so paranoid." He patted my hand with his own, just like mom used to do whenever I got angry in public. I hated that he was acting more like a parent now, instead of me, seeing as how I was the one in charge of taking care of him. "Really, you don't need to panic over everything," Ryan added.

Oh, but I do. I really do.

"Annabel? What a lovely name," the oldest said. I frowned and glared at him. "My name is Demetrius Alderic." He held out a hand, but I refused to shake it. He pulled his hand back and stared at me, "You're a very interesting person aren't you," he inquired.

"I'm still too young for you," I retorted. Demetrius laughed and rested his hand on his chin. He kept watching me. "I'm not interested," I replied, turning my head away from them.

"I never meant anything like that," Demetrius defended. I still kept my eyes on the stage in front of me though. "This is my youngest brother, Kari. The other two you saw with me, well the one who didn't yell at you was Namir, and the one who did was Aiden. They're both juniors. Namir's eighteen, and Aiden's seventeen. What about you, Annabel?" I felt my fists tighten when he said my name so lightly…so casually.

"Annabel's a junior too! She turned sixteen last June." Ryan said excitedly. I turned my head to stare at my brother. I was about to tell him to stop talking, but I couldn't. He sounded happy, and I'd never stop that. "I'm only a seventh grader, and I'm still eleven. My name's Ryan Hartman. It's nice to meet you." He gave a genuine smile and my heart broke, because he never smiled that way anymore. At least, he never smiled like that since mom died. He gave the kind where his lips pulled back to show his white teeth, and his eyes squinted. I missed seeing that smile.

"I'm eleven too. Are you new to the school?" For the first time, I heard the youngest, Kari, whisper. His voice was so light that I had to strain to hear it. He lifted his eyes to the both of us. He was fiddling with his small hands, and for being a seventh grader in high school, he seemed much younger.

"Yeah, we just moved two weeks ago." Ryan answered. Suddenly the two younger boys broke into a conversation, and I leaned back in my chair to ignore them. I felt myself drifting into a depressing sleep, but I made sure to remain alert enough to break for the exit if it was required…

… "Your mother died, and it's all your fault. You know why she died. You know why…" Opening my eyes I stared into darkness. The voice was still echoing in my sleep. I shivered at the familiar sound. "Her blood is on your hands."

"I never asked her to do it," I whispered. I was scared and weak, two things that I was never allowed to feel growing up. But with this voice, the second I heard it, I broke the tough charade I put on for everyone else.

"Oh, but she had to."It hissed. I looked around for the enemy that never let me be. For two months, in my dreams, I could never escape. I waited to see it, but everything was so dark that I couldn't even see my own hands.

"No," I shook my head. The darkness was closing in, as impossible as that sounded. I felt like I couldn't breathe, but I felt the need to try and explain myself. "She had a choice…she made the wrong choice. I never wanted that for her." Tears were falling down my eyes lightly as I collapsed onto the ground. I kneeled down. I wished to hide my face, I was so ashamed of my tears, but the air was too heavy. I couldn't lift my arms up in order to cover my weakness. "She made the wrong choice."

"You should've known better…"

"I didn't know! How was I supposed to know? I was born this way."

"You killed her," the voice hissed.

"No, I didn't," I whispered. "She just made the wrong choice. SHE DID IT TO HERSELF!" I sobbed uncontrollably. I wouldn't willingly cry like this. I had always been able to hold it back except in my sleep.

"No, it was you. Admit it." I shook my head as the voice grew louder. "Come on Annabel, you know better. She was a good mother, wasn't she?" I didn't respond. "Why is she dead? She had no curse on her like you. She's dead because she sacrificed her life for you, so why won't you admit it."

"She made the wrong choice," I insisted between short breathes of air. The world fell back away from me, as the darkness formed into a shape. There stood the shadow that forever haunted me since the day my mother was killed. I felt my entire body go rigid. "She made the wrong choice," I muttered. When I finished my sentence, the shadow started towards me slowly. I kept repeating those words, hoping the shadow would believe me, but it didn't work. Just as its hand wrapped around my neck, I could only manage one more word. "No!"I flung myself forward and opened my eyes…