Leah paused outside the dungeons, she knew she needed to do this right. If she said one word or suggested something Loki didn't like, it could be a disaster. Either he would refuse to speak to her ever again which wouldn't be too bad but would definitely limit the amount of information she could get from him. Or he would turn on her, his hatred and anger aimed at her and with his projections she didn't fancy that at all.
Taking a deep breath in she calmed her nerves knowing she needed to be strong and ready for anything Loki threw her way. She headed down to the dungeon going straight to one of the prison guards on duty, not even bothering to look into the cell. Part of her was terrified to see if Loki was looking at her, as she knew that this was a risky move on her part. She just hoped it shocked him enough to take her seriously.
"I want to talk to the prisoner." Leah told the guard who nodded and lowered whatever force field was used to keep Loki and all the other prisoners within there cells.
Leah slowly turn to see that Loki was sitting on the floor staring at her. His green eyes watching her as she entered the cell. She just walked, she heard the crackle of the force field raising behind her. Her eyes connected with Loki's green ones as she looked down at him, she slowly sat herself down on the bench provided. She just stared at him for a couple of minutes neither of them breaking the silence. Leah knew she needed to make the first move.
"Not so talkative now?" She smirked looking down for a moment before looking straight back at him. "I thought I would repay the favour after you seem to visit me so often."
"Have you come to torture me then Leah?" Loki asked sounding a little quieter than his projection. He seemed a little rougher around the edges compared to the usual smart self in his apparition. She could see the defeated look in his eyes here, it never showed before but now it was plain to see.
"I thought I would start with some questions first, which you will answer." Leah told him using a very authoritative voice. "There are things my boss wants to know. Did you have any help orchestrating the attack on earth? I mean to get an entire fully capable army. Must have cost something to some one with a lot of power?"
"There are many worlds out there Leah, more than even you could possible think. You think yourselves as a developed race but you are feeble. There are worlds out there which are more powerful than your own. Who would see a race like yours destroyed or enslaved." He replied slowly standing up making her feel slightly nervous. "It is just too easy to take control of something so weak, if you have the power to do so."
"Why." Leah just stared at him her mouth opened leaning forward on her seat frowning at him trying to understand every word he said.
"Because you're an inferior race, you hold such little power which others could easily defeat. It would not take much for another world to try what I did all because of the way you act now. Your world fights against its own about such petty matters while they do not see the real threat that could come. It is pathetic." Loki started to pace the cell as he spoke.
"Yes but its more complicated than you make out." Leah began getting defensive about what he was saying regarding her home. Though part of her could see the truth in his words.
"No it isn't really." Loki interrupted by raising his finger. "Is it not just about power and control?"
Leah sat back for a moment thinking what he had said, it did make perfect sense. They weren't ready for another attack like the one in new york, they barely got through that. Even then there was a lot lost. It didn't change much though, there were still wars going on between countries that didn't even seem to matter post the attack. Leah finally looked back at Loki who was leaning against the wall opposite, staring down at her.
They remained in silence for a while, she wasn't really sure what to say. She slowly looked around the bleak cell, she then realized how incredibly lonely it must be being stuck within the same four walls day in day out. She kind of understood why he seemed come and speak to her, she was an escape for him. If he went to his mother he risked being found out by his brother or father which could make the punishment worse. Loki coming to her however seemed so unlikely, it was only her not going to Thor to tell him the truth which stood between them.
"Why did you come to me?" Leah muttered still thinking not looking at him. "How did you know that I wouldn't run to Thor immediately."
"I didn't." Loki shrugged looking at the force field and the guard outside it.
"Its one hell of a risk." Leah commented.
He didn't reply or look at her, she knew then that this was not a subject he wished to speak about. This baffled Leah, she really didn't understand why he was doing this at all. She could feel a slight fear and worry run through her knowing that Loki must have something planned or was thinking something that she had yet to find out.
"Tell me about how you tried to prove yourself to your father?" She sighed knowing that perhaps this question would give her more to work with.
Loki looked back at her, his green eyes showed the shocked for a moment. She knew it was a very personal question but after what his mother said about proving himself and Loki's unwillingness to talk about it last time. It was a good place to start. He just looked at her his green eyes large and wide before he looked away.
"I only tried to prove I was a just as worthy of being king as Thor was." Loki began sounding a little bitter and uneasy. She could see that lost look appear on his face like it did when he came to her room after his mother had visited. "The All father was in" He paused looking at her while thinking "after a illness of such had started, Thor was banished which left me the only known heir."
"Okay." Leah nodded absorbing the information Loki was giving her.
"My mother tried, she tried to explain why he had done what he had done with me. She handed the burden of being King to me, telling me to make my so called father proud." Loki told her, obviously trying to think about the best way to explain what happened. He slowly slid down the wall and sat on the floor. "I realized then never actually wanted to be," He stopped she could hear the distress in his voice.
"You didn't want to be king?" Leah interrupted him but trying to be gentle and assuring knowing that this was not a happy topic for Loki.
"Before then no, but at that moment of time I was upset and angry that I had been lied too." Loki glanced at her, she could see the distraught look upon his face. "That my whole life had been a farce. I envied Thor, always the favoured son, always the best. Then I knew what I had to do. I had to get rid of my opposition to give me time to show the All father that I was a worthy son."
"You were loved though." Leah muttered pity pouring through her voice, she stared at him leaning forward, knowing exactly what he said was the truth. "Your mother still loved you then and loves you now."
"Its not the same though." Loki shook his head looking and sounding a little frustrated. "Its like when people look at you as the Archers little sister, does that not annoy you."
"Yes but that's different." Leah drawled
"Is it?" Loki raised an eyebrow questioningly at her. "It is similar, I just wanted to prove to him. Except I failed and only succeeded to push myself out."
"What did you actually do Loki?" Leah mumbled not quiet understanding what had happened.
He just sat there not looking at her but back at the floor. She waited a few minutes before realizing that he was not going to say any more now. She knew how hard it must be for him to have to explain himself. Leah stood up and just let out a sigh of pity before leaving saying.
"Thank you for telling me the truth Loki."
She headed straight back to her room before getting into a large t-shirt and shorts. Her mind was racing after what Loki had told her, for the first time she felt sorry for him. He actually seemed to process real emotions, she saw a side of him which she never thought she would witness. She was just writing her first report since arriving going through what Loki said about the other worlds. She paused she didn't feel right writing what Loki said about his family and personal feelings. It felt like he had confided in her and it was wrong to tell any one else.
She was sitting on the bed chewing on the end of the pen reading what she had written with one leg tucked under her, while the other was stretched out in front of her. She didn't hear anything but she felt her hair prickled up on the back of her neck, she knew that feeling as she slowly raised her eyes from the paper on her bed.
Loki stood in the corner of her room watching her silently, he was dressed more modestly, not in his full armour and looking a lot less threatening. She just looked back at him for a moment before putting her report to one side, knowing he had come to talk to her. She moved over before pulling both legs up against her chest continuing to stare at him. She was for once not really sure what to say to him.
"Sorry I was rude earlier not answering your question." He began looking down breaking eye contact with her. "It is not easy to talk about, in fact it is very painful."
"You don't have to talk about it now, not if you don't want too." Leah began trying to sound sympathetic. She just wrapped her arms around her legs and stared at him as he moved forward before perching on the side of her bed. For the first time Leah was not worried about his proximately, she didn't even bother to move away.
"It was my anger over all which did the damage." He began trying to explain. "I…I just wanted to show everyone I was as good as Thor."
"You just went the wrong way about it." Leah muttered shrugging trying to let him know she understood what he was trying to tell her. "What happened them?"
"I fell." Loki said quietly, his mind sounded else where now. His voice almost distant. "I fell for what seemed an eternity. Then I had to find my way alone."
"You had no one." Leah rested her head on her knees staring at him, he just shook his head. "It must have been lonely."
"I was just full of rage, hate and pain." Loki continued his voice beginning to sound like his old self.
"So what then?" Leah tried to nudge the conversation on.
"I met the commander of chitauri after a while. He introduced me to." Loki paused she could see his eyes looked watery and suddenly full of worry ."It doesn't matter, I got handed the staff and power from it. None of it really matters now."
"Does it still matter to you though, proving yourself?" Leah sighed trying to make sense of what he was trying but failing to really tell her.
Loki turned for the first time looking at her, she could now see the tears that ran down his pale cheeks. She went to touch his hand which was on the bed but remember that he was not really there with her. Her hand just hovered for a moment over the top of it, both of them looking at it for a moment before he finally replied.
"Yes." He then vanished from in front of her.
