Hey everyone. I truly apologize for not updating. I feel like a poopbag for not pleasing you. I also realized that this fanfic has become popular recently. Which I don't know why because its not normal ill tell you that! But I will try not to abandon it, do you guys actually like it? Let me know. I will try hard to update more and the time span between updates be shorter. Anyway, here we go.
The host club doors are bust open as a loud Tamaki bursts into the room to confront me. "What is the meaning of this Maka-kun, why am I blocked on your Facebook profile?!"
"Because you blow up my notifications." Im not even kidding. He Likes everything I do. And you wanna know what else? He tried to troll the twins into thinking he was far more Facebook famous than them when he showed that he had 1,987 notifications. A large sum is because he has everyone as a close friend on Facebook. Creep.
"I sent you a relationship request as your father two years ago! It's still pending!"
"You're a freak."
Kyoya set a folder down in front of everyone. "Alright. Everyone please look over the files and make sure to chunk the information and right margin notes."
"WTF, DON'T DO DIS KYOYA." I bang my head on the table. Why do I have to deal with school even with Kyoya.
"Wait, this is the host club information for the month. Why are Chou and Maka-kun included?"Haruhi asked after 30 minutes and I didn't read shit.
"Because Chou and Maka from now on will be included as hosts from here on out."
"WHAT?! WHEN THE CRAP DID I SELL MYSELF TO YOU GUYS?!"I should, after reading atleast one sentence that said with smart words that I was practically their property.
"You guys have been the talk of our patrons, and have actually requested to meet with you. The technique you guys will use will be similar to Hikaru and Kaoru, but since you two are both women, Maka-kun will be cosplaying."
"Don't tell me.."
"You are going to be dressed as a popular anime character."
"HOLD IT! What do you think I am, a porn star? There's no way in hell Im going through with this!" I grab Chou and head for the door.
"Maka-kun have you forgotten our little chat?"
DEAR GOD.
"Are you saying that Chou will be scrapped like she's crap?
"No doubt. If she does not perform her duties, the Company will mark her as a failed project and get rid of her."
The hell? It's bad enough that she's a sex doll, but she is not a failed project. She tries so hard to perform her 'duties' but because of me, she hasn't done crap.
"Listen, I do not advise that you have sex with her. But what I can do is send weekly information to the Creators of her performance."
"But what performance? You know damn well I cant have sex with her!"
Kyoya stands up. "I'll be willing to develop an imitation software that performs the exact same programmimg that her main system sends information with. I could alter the information of her performing something else and translate it to the exact results that the Creators want."
"And what is that?"
Kyoya smirks.
"You depraved son of a-"
"Now now Maka-kun. Isnt this far more easier than the task you were assigned before. This way you don't have to do those things with Otomina."
"Damn you."
I turn around and face the rest of the group. "Y'all listen to me now cause I will only say this once. I will gladly join your depraved group of testosterone infested freaks! But I wont promise you Ill show up on time and don't be surprised if someone managed to eat all your food. "
The twins smirked and patted my back. "Welcome to the club."
FML.
"So is this the club you mentioned? The host club?"
"Yes my lady. This is where they are keeping 01."
"Heh."
A women with long white hair walks away. "It wont be difficult for 01 to complete her duties with that sum of men. Come along. We have more work to do, before we release the greatest plan in the history of Tanimoto electronics."
"The hell?" I read off the package that Kyoya sent me. "These are the costume for this week. Dry clean it."
"Ah, "Haruhi looks at it. "This is Rin Okumura cosplay, you know, from Blue Exorcist."
"You watch anime?"
"My dad does."
I sigh. "I don't know why girls are so obsessed with anime guys, they're the most irrelevant creatures this planet has to offer."
"I don't know what good this will do. Cant I just wear a hat?"
"Because Blue Exorcist is trending right now."
"Fuck the mainstream."
Chou jumps on me." Yay, Maka-kun will be cosplaying. Can I cosplay too? I'll be a sexy nurse.~"
"Do it and I'll connect you to the toaster."
"You can do that?" Haruhi asked.
"Yeah, last night we didn't have a second controller and she connected some wire she took out of her chest."
"That's odd."
"She cheated too. There's no way in hell you can open Lee Rock's special move on Hinata. Wtf is that alien crap."
Haruhi laughs and pulls out her cellphone. "I gotta call my dad. I need to tell him I'm sleeping over."
"Does he really leave you alone during the night?"
"It's alright. After all, his work is his work, it can't be helped. He puts a roof over us."
The wind blows.
"What the crap. The window is shut." I go to check.
"Somebody is watching." Chou says.
"How do you know?"Haruhi asks.
Chou starts taking off her clothes and slides into bed. "Somebody watches every night. They watch me when I make out with Maka-kun in her sleep."
I gag. "Wtf really?!" That's practically rape!
"What if it's the Creators? They want to know if she's doing her duties right?"
Chou hugs her pillows. "Commence system sleep mode. Approximately seven minutes before dream state."
"That's kind of creepy. I don't want someone watching me at night. I have Chou for that."
Haruhi shuts the curtain. "You should set up more security."
"Pfft. That crap don't keep anything secure. Those damn hosts get past my man eating dogs all the time."
Chou giggles. "Mmmm.. Oh Maka-kun, please suck on me there."
My face crinkles. "I don't wanna know what the crap she's dreaming about."
Thanks for reading! c:
DISCLAIMER: As realistic as I am trying to make this I donot own the trademarks that are you usually the punchline to Maka-kun's sarcastic jokes.