NON REVERSABLE EFFECTS

EPILOGUE

Slowly but surely I was getting used to the biggest change that I was sure had ever happened—or was going to happen in my life. In those forty-eight hours that me and SG-1 had been held captive on that Planet, had changed me and my life. I know that it sounded stupid, there had been a whole shit load that had changed the instant I had joined the SCG. Changing into a tiger, almost mauling a friend, my "vision" of being captured and raped by Joshua, and killing people unwillingly—and on top of that part, getting stuck in between my Transformation.

All of it was hard, but the being stuck in between part and killing that man and girl, seemed to top everything. I'm mean, when I had killed Joshua, I had actually felt relief that he would be able to come after me or hurt me anymore. But when I killed that Quatonian and that girl, I had a different feeling. I hadn't wanted to kill them, I had had no issue with them, and I was instead forced against my will to fight the. And even though every time I thought about it, I also felt relief that I was still alive. Because if I was dead, than I wouldn't have what I have right now, at this very moment. I wouldn't have my home—which was the SGC—and I wouldn't have a makeshift family—Jack, Daniel, Teal'c, Carter and now, as it turned out, Mitchell. I might not have seemed like much, but for me it was allot and it was all I had.

After what Daniel had said to me in his office, I slowly started to come out of the shell that had entrapped me after the mid-Transformation. What he had said was true: who gave a shit that the other SGC personnel were uncomfortable around me, that was their problem, not mine. What Colonel Mitchell had said too—when we were in my quarters and I was high—had helped too. So my ears were out, as well as my tail, because I was not going to ashamed of whom I was.

And as I walked down the halls of the SGC in a quick, barely controlled pace, I realized that now I was not a Quatonian and could no longer be compared to them. It felt as if a weight that I hadn't realized was on my shoulders was lifted. I felt lighter, and in that new light my pace had picked up. I needed to find Daniel, I needed to show him something that and it needed to be seen now.

I found Daniel office and charged inside, apparently going unnoticed by Daniel who was trying to find a book from one of his many shelves. A goofy grin was plastered on my face as I came up behind him, and spun him around.

*"Nick!" he gasped out in surprise, stumbling a little before he righted himself.

Before he could say another word, I yanked my tee up and over my head. Daniel looked at me like I was crazy, but it didn't matter as I turned my back to him.

"Ready?" I asked him, my voice hyper and my body vibrated with it.

"Sure. . .?" he said, confused out of his mind.

"Watch," I looked at him over my shoulder, my brow furrowing in concentration. My tail was still, until it suddenly twitched and flickered, it vibrated for a second before it lifted up and started to move leisurely from side to side.

Daniel looked down at it with wide eyes, before he looked back up at me; kinda speechless with a smile on his lips.

"Right?" I said. "I've been working on it for awhile now, and I finally got it."

My grin was so huge that I was sure that it was going to split my face, and though it seemed small, it felt like I just turned over a big obstacle. To say the least, I was very pleased with myself and Daniel seemed to be too.

Nickolas P. Summers.

C#- 00357-9648-0901

RANK- Lieutenant