Ah donut own dis here awesome-tastic movie/book series.
"'ello mate," A rich deep voice said from the shadows. Surprised, Jokul twirled around, but scoffed quietly when he saw the Easter Bunny, "been a long time; the blizzard o' '68 oi believe," Creeping forward, he dramatically leaped backwards as Bunny came out, "Easter Sunday, wasn' it?"
"Aw Bunny, you're not still mad about that. Are ya?" Jokul asked, laughing quietly.
"Yes, but this is about somethin' else." Bunny started, looking down at his boomerang. "Fellas."
"Wha-?" Jokul started, before noticing furry forms appearing and shoving him in a sack -"Hey! Put me down!" -then through a portal.
Slightly discombobulated, he wriggled his way out of the sack to find the Moon's chosen 'favorites' standing before him. "Heyyyy, there he is! Jack Frost!" North said, spreading his arms wide.
"Wow... You gotta be kidding me." Jokul muttered to himself, before being lifted into the air by the same creatures that stuffed him into the sack. "H-ey-ey, put me down!"
"I hope the yetis treated you well." North said- not really sounding like he cared.
"Oh yeah~, I love being shoved in a sack and tossed through a magic portal," he snarled out, sarcastically.
"Oh good, that was my idea!" North smiled even more broadly than before. Jokul could not believe this guy, like seriously. Did he not understand basic language? North was already turning elsewhere, however, so Jokul had no time to correct the large man. "You know Bunny, obviously."
"Obviously." Jokul agreed.
"And then there's Tooth."
Jokul barely had time to look the other way before the fairy was upon him, wings all a-flutter and jaw going faster than before-mentioned wings; if that was possible. "Hello Jack, I've heard a lot about you, and your teeth!"
"…my what?"
"Open up!" She reached forward and pulled his mouth open. "Are they really as white as they say? Aww, they really do sparkle like freshly-fallen snow~!" A few of the weird hummingbird things gasped and ah-ed, causing -Tooth? - to berate them. "Now girls, let's not disgrace the uniform."
"-and Sandman... Sandy, Sandy. Wake up!" North continued as if nothing had happened.
Jokul ignored them, "So... anyone wanna tell me why I'm here?" Sandy waved a hand in the air before at random- or so it seemed- causing pictures to appear above his head. "Uh... it-it, that's not really helping... But- but thanks little man."
Turning away he froze a random elf. "Now what have I done that would cause all of you to be here together..." Turning around he glanced at North again, "Am I on the Naughty list?"
"Ahaha, on Naughty List? You hold record." The man laughed in response. "But! No matter, we overlook, now we are wiping slate clean."
This caused Jokul to become more curious by the second. "How come?" He asked, ignoring an 'Aha, good question.' from the rabbit.
"How come? I tell you how come!" North began. Finally they were getting somewhere, "because now, you are Guardian!" The man said, throwing his hands in the air as music began.
Jokul found himself backing away from Tooth's helpers, just following that North cried: "Is the best part!" Stomping his feet to the drumbeats. There were elves all around his feet, and yetis juggling flaming sticks. One elf pointed sternly at his bare feet, then at a pair of... -Death forbid, were those…? -shoes held by two more smiling elves. A yeti brought a huge book over to North who began to open it.
Enough was enough- the swooning bird-thingies, Sandman raising a glass in "cheers", even Bunny's glaring eyes- Jokul raised his stick high and slammed it into the ground. Frost coated everything outward. After silence was all there was, Jokul broke it. "What makes you think I want to be a Guardian?"
Silence for a moment, then North started laughing like that was the funniest thing he'd ever heard. The following four words had Jokul so infuriated he felt like killing someone. "Of course you do. Music!"
Before anymore... whatever could start up again, Jokul called out: "No music!" A nearby elf threw it's trumpet to the floor before walking away. Jokul wished he could do the same. "This is all very flattering but, you don't want me. You're all 'hard work' and 'deadlines' while I'm snowballs and fun times. I'm not a Guardian."
An irritating, very unappreciated Bunny agreed. "Ha, yeah, that's exactly wot I said!"
Tooth glared at him before fluttering over to Jokul, "Jack, I don't think you completely understand what it is we do. Each of those lights, is a child." She gestured at the globe behind her.
"A child who believes;" North added, walking over as well, "and good, or bad. Naughty, or nice. We protect them." The cheesy moment was ruined by the tooth fairy shoving her fingers in his mouth. "Okay, no more wishy-washy. Pitch is up to doing who knows what!"
Jokul Frosti could not believe his ears. Pitch Black? He couldn't be back, could he...? "Pitch? You mean the boogieman?"
"Yes! When Pitch threatens us, he threatens them!" North gestured to the globe once more. But honestly, Jokul couldn't find it in himself to care. Pitch Black was back...
"All the more reason to find someone more qualified." Jokul couldn't believe what he was saying. He was being given a chance to destroy Pitch... but then again, he'd be considered a hypocrite if he fought with them.
"You think we pick? No! You were chosen, like we all were chosen!" Jokul did not like where this was going. "...by Man in Moon!"
"What?" Jokul asked, not believing- for the second time that day- his ears.
"Last night Jack, he chose you."
"Maybe." The sour rabbit added.
"Man in the Moon... He talks to you?" He asked, even though he already knew it. North said something unintelligible, "Wh-why, why wouldn't he tell me that himself?" Manny was just so twisted. "Whaough... After 3-" he caught himself from saying 'million', "-hundred years, this is his answer? To spend eternity like you guys-" He couldn't believe this, "cooped up in some- some hideout thinking of-of new ways to bribe kids?" He ended his mini rant with his voice two notes higher than when he began.
"No no." He turned and stared straight at the moon, "That's not for me!" As if just realizing he had an audience, he glanced at the others, "No offense."
"H-h-how, how is that not offensive?" Bunny asked, staring at the other in incredulity. "You know- you know what oi think. Oi think we just dodged a bullet, oi mean what does this clown know about bringing joy to children, anyway?"
Jokul knew bait when he saw it, but he couldn't resist, anything to lift the heavy mood. "Ah, ever heard of a snow day? I know it's no hard-boiled egg, but kids like what I do."
"But none of them believe in you." Bunny rose to his feet once more, "do they? Y'see, you're invisible mate, it's like you don't even exist."
"Bunny! Stop..."
"No. No, the kangaroo's right."
"What? What did you call me? I'm not a kangaroo."
"Oh, and all this time I thought you were. If you're not a kangaroo, what are you?"
"I'm a bunny, the Easter Bunny. People believe in me."
Tense silence echoed around the room. Bunny and Jokul were nose-to-nose. But before anyone could say anything, Jokul pulled back, a twisted, false grin on his face.
"Wow. Cause ya know, first impressions are everything, and I gotta admit. This," He gestured to the lot of them, "was a great first impression. So great that I know how much I don't want to be included in your little group." He turned his back on them again.
Lazily walking away, he continued on. "I mean, Pitch Black has done quite a few pretty bad things in his life, I've been witness to... most of them- but that doesn't mean that joining you is on my agenda of 'Everything I wanna do before I die'; or get consumed, either one.
"And then, there's you." He tossed a glance over one of his shoulders. "You guys are the 'Oh yeah, we're the most amazing spirits you'll ever run in to. Cause ya know, we're Manny's favorites.' I really do despise you and you're attitudes, so that's a big reason.
"Annnnd... hum. That's about it, for now. So good~bye." Leaping through a window he had slowly meandered over to, Jokul disappeared from their sight.
"Well... that could have gone better." Tooth slowly said, glancing at Bunny inconspicuously-or so she thought.
It's an annoyed rabbit, oh fun.