Chapter 8: The Hogwarts High Inquisitor Part 1

I am so sorry this took so long, but I had to restart it several times and once my computer suddenly crashed and I lost all of my data. Not to mention my epilepsy. Anyway...

It was early Monday morning. A week had past since term began. Filch's office was empty except for Mrs Norris who was sitting on his desk. She was reading some of the reports on Filch's desk. No, looking at the reports; cats couldn't read... could they?

Mrs Norris's eyes were scanning across the words on the parchment. She purred. It almost sounded like she was saying "Hmm."

The door opened and Mrs Norris looked up. Filch entered holding a large fish. 'Morning, my sweet,' he said, smiling at his cat. 'I've gots a lovely fresh salmon for you.' He put it in her food dish beside a saucer of milk. 'There you are,' Filch continued, 'A lovely fresh bit o' milk. You like your milk don't you.'

Filch looked up at his cat. His smile faded slightly. Mrs Norris hadn't moved; she was just staring at her master. 'Are you alright my sweet?' he asked her. Mrs Norris just stared at him. After a moment she jumped of the desk and walked over to her food dish. Filch relaxed.

Mrs Norris took a nibble out of the fish. She frowned. "Is this really the best Filch can do?" someone thought... and it wasn't Mrs Norris who was thinking it.

Hermione gasped and flattened out the newspaper revealing a large photograph of Dolores Umbridge, smiling widely and blinking slowly at them from beneath the headline:

MINISTRY SEEKS EDUCATIONAL REFORM

DOLORES UMBRIDGE APPOINTED FIRST EVER HIGH INQUISITOR

'Umbridge - "High Inquisitor"?' said Harry darkly, his half-eaten piece of toast slipping from his fingers. 'What does that mean?' Hermione read the article out-loud. When she had finished there was a stunned silence. 'So now we know how we ended up with Umbridge! Fudge passed this "Educational Decree" and forced her on us! And now he's given her the power to inspect the other teachers!' Hermione was breathing fast and her eyes were very bright. 'I can't believe this. It's outrageous!'

'I know it is,' Harry said. He looked down at his right hand, clenched on on the table-top, and saw the faint white outline of the words Umbridge had forced him to cut into his skin. But a grin was unfurling on Ron's face.

'What?' said Harry and Hermione together, staring at him. 'I can't wait to see McGonnagle inspected. Umbridge won't know what hit her.'

Defence Against the Dark Arts was pretty much a repeat of the previous Monday; another week's worth of detentions for Harry.

Wonder and Hope however were just as interesting and fun as the previous week. In Wonder, Harry had managed to carve the main body of a snitch and the wings separately and he was just about to join them together when the bell rang. North had also asked them all to write a Christmas list and send it to him.

Hope was an easy lesson. In spite of the fact that the weather was overcast, the quarry felt as warm as if the sun was shining bright and warm on them. In fact, this week, Bunny was making small chocolate eggs with strange fillings like caramel made from the milk of an "intergalactic bovine creature that occasionally jumps over the moon".

Memory class was next. Harry, Ron and Hermione ascended the stairs to the ornate, golden door. The entire class (minus the Slytherins to general delight) were waiting for the doors to open. They didn't have to wait long. After half a minute, the doors creaked open. The mini-fairies flew around them, peering in at their teeth presumably to cheek they had been brushing correctly.

They then bowed and gestured into the class. This time, Tooth was waiting for them instead of still giving orders. 'Hello everyone,' Tooth said happily, bobbing up and down in the air. 'I've got the scrolls ready for you all. We've got a lot of teeth out today.' She looked positively delighted about it.

'I'm going to divide you all into groups, arranged by-' 'Ahem,' said a soft, girly voice. Harry felt a rising sense of absolute dread. His stomach shrank and wobbled. Very slowly, he turned 180 degrees to face the door. The short and stout figure of Dolores Umbridge was standing there, smiling widely and holding a clipboard.

Harry turned back to face Toothiana. She was looking around, slightly worriedly, at some of her mini-fairies, apparently under the impression that one of them had made the noise. She scratched her head in confusion. 'Ahem!' 'Oh, hello there,' Tooth said smiling and not at all flustered that she had just mistaken Umbridge for one of her fairies. 'Aren't you Dolores?' 'Dolores Jane Umbridge, yes,' Umbridge said smiling sweetly. 'You received my note telling you of the time and date of my inspection.

'Umm,' Tooth said, running her hands over herself like someone checking their coat pockets. She looked up, flew into the ceiling, tugged on something and flew back down holding a slightly torn piece of parchment. 'Well, I received your note, but I found your handwriting too loopy to read. Sorry.' Umbridge's eye twitched. 'No matter,' she said, 'Please continue teaching as normal. I am going to walk among the students and ask them questions.' The questions were simple; "What do you think of the classes?" "What do you think of Professor Tooth?" "Would you say these lessons are interesting?" and similar questions.

While Umbridge was asking questions, Tooth was searching the shelves. She was a little unsure about Umbridge so she was looking for her baby teeth. After twenty minutes, she managed to find a small box labeled "Dolores Umbridge." She lifted it up and opened it. She had never been so horrified; the teeth that had once been contained in the box had rotted into small piles of greyish-black dust. This meant that there was not so much as an ounce of her childhood memories left in her.

Tooth dropped the box as the bell rang. The dust blew out of the box and dissipated on the air. This didn't make any difference to Umbridge though as she had already lost her childhood memories. Tooth returned back to the class to wave them off. Umbridge however stepped forward.

'Before I go Professor might I just ask you,' Umbridge said, 'How old are you and how long have you been teaching here?' Tooth thought for a moment. 'Umm, I've been teaching here just over a week...' 'Ah yes, of course, you're new here,' Umbridge said, making a note on her clipboard. 'And I don't know my actual age, but I know that I'm older than the mountains, but younger than the wind.' Umbridge stopped and looked up. Harry who had just been about to leave, stopped in his tracks to listen too.

'I beg your pardon?' Umbridge said politely, smiling quite disbelieving. 'Umm,' Tooth counted on her fingers. 'Yeah, older than the mountains and younger than the wind... give or take a month or two.'

"Mrs Norris" sat outside the class, watching as Umbridge left the classroom. She smiled.