Author's Note: Do I really have to say it? Don't own the show or anything. Dedicated to the fans out there, the creator, and show!

I know my chapter are getting shorter but I'll see if I can make them more longer.

"This means talking'

~ This means thinking ~

Chapter 4: Slowly Losing Control

It was about 5:00 in the morning, when Gohan woke up. His mother was still not up yet and he just really couldn't go to sleep, not after what he dreamed.

"You won't be able to stop me this time. And you won't be able to save them." It's what his duplicate had told him. But he wondered if it was merely a dream or a warning of some sort.

Seeing as he couldn't sleep, Gohan got up and dressed himself in that purple gi he had worn when he fought against Cell.

He opened his window and got out quietly not wanting to wake his mom.

Out in the fresh air, Gohan shot up into the air and went to the place where his father used to take him all the time.

For him, it was still painful knowing his father would never come back. He had the chance and blew it. And now because of it, everything's changed.

Arriving at the place Gohan landed and laid down thinking about all the great time he had had with his father.

Riding on the nimbus cloud with him laughing and flying with the seagulls as flying fishes jumped right over them. Enjoying his first four years of life with his father before the arrival of the saiyans. Being able to be with him those three peaceful years before the androids showed up. And even though they were training in the Hyperbolic Time Chamber they still managed to have a lot of laughs.

He remembered this specific moment.

(Flash Back)

Gohan himself had been training in SSJ level when Goku called his name.

"Lunch is ready! Come and get it!" Yelled Goku.

"Kay."

Gohan came running to his father, who had been holding a piece of meat.

"It's time to load up son. And remember a true super saiyan eats everything on his plate. Got it."

"Right."

"Oh and could you grill this for me?" Said Goku throwing the piece of meat into the air.

Gohan threw a small energy wave at it and in a split second it was cooked.

Goku caught it as it came down. "Ah yeah."

The meat started to smoke and all of a sudden it went up into flames and disintegrated. Goku's face was a bit dirty from the flames but his hair had caught on fire, just a little though.

"Dad your hair."

"Now Gohan, what did I tell you about controlling your power?" Asked Goku. And as he spoke the fire started to spread a little.

"I know, but dad, your hair's on" - Gohan was cut off. "Don't change the subject Gohan. You've got to learn – Aaahhhhhhh! Put it out! Put it out!" Goku started to yell as he finally realized his hair was on fire.

"I told you dad! Hold still!"

(End of flashback)

Gohan couldn't help but laugh a little at the memory.

He also remembered when his friends and him also celebrated his birthday. Hanging out with Krillin, fishing with his dad, and how when he tried to blow his candles out the whole thing got destroyed with the air.

"I sure do miss you dad. I still just can't understand why you decided to stay in other world when you had the chance to come back." Said Gohan, recalling what Goku said.

"Gohan's so strong now I've got nothing left to teach him."

"But that doesn't mean I don't need you." Said Gohan.

"You all better take notes of everything that happens in your life cause when there through I'll want to hear all about them. Until then goodbye."

And that was it. Just like that Goku decided to remain dead.

"He said that it was because of all the enemies that were after him. But not every single one of them is out for revenge on him. The saiyans technically came for the dragon balls, frieza did come after him, but when Garlic Jr. came he was after me not father. The androids came after him but even so not every single villain is just here for revenge. Like Dr. Wheelo, Turles, or Lord Slug, they wanted the planet."

"I'd give anything just to be able to take it all back and destroy Cell when dad told me too. It's too late now though. Speaking of late I should be getting back before mom realizes I sneaked out."

All of a sudden a dark shadow fell over him. Noticing this, Gohan quickly turned around but there was no one in site for miles.

"That's strange. I could have sworn someone was behind me."

Gohan quickly scanned the area for any ki signals but he picked up nothing at all.

"Huh. I guess I must have imagined it or something."

With that Gohan powered up and headed back home.

After Gohan left the creature that had been behind him emerged from it's hiding place. A big smile spread over it's face.

(Hours later)

Gohan was sitting on the couch in the living room watching TV. He couldn't help but narrow his eyes when he saw the buffoon of Hercule Satan, the man who stole his credit for defeating Cell. Of course Gohan and his friends could care less about that but, it always got on his nerves that he would insult him,his friends, and especially his father.

It was a wonder how people could actually believe that he defeated Cell.

"Gohan." Said a voice that broke him out of his thoughts.

"Yes mother."

"Are you alright Gohan? Ever since the Cell Games you don't seem yourself. Your always such a hyper happy kid. Your still not upset over your father are you? Because if you want you know we can talk about it."

The truth was that he still was. He blamed himself for Goku's death. And not being able to be with him was painful. His friends keep telling him that it's not his fault. But when he hears that all he hears is lies. How can they not blame him? It was after all his responsibility to finish Cell.

"No of course not. I'm fine. Don't worry."

Chichi walked away, not pleased with the answer. She knew he was lying to her. That much was pretty obvious. Gohan always wore a smile on his face even when he did things that he didn't like.

Knocking her out of her thoughts was the sound of the phone ringing.

"Hello?"

"Hi chichi. It's me Bulma."

"Oh hi Bulma. What is it that you called for?" Asked Chichi.

"I called to ask if you and Gohan wanted to come to a party we're throwing at the Lookout. Trunks came back and told us that he beat the androids in the future so everyone is going to be there."

~ This party could be good for Gohan. ~ Thought Chichi as she looked back at her son.

~ Maybe seeing all his friends again is just what he needs to cheer him up. ~

"So are you guys coming?" Asked Bulma.

"Yes. We'd be glad to come over."

"Great. The party will be at 5:00. See you then. Bye. "

"Bye."

Chichi hanged up and walked back to the living room.

"Gohan get up and get dressed were going to the Lookout to go to a party that Bulma is throwing."

"Do I have to go? I don't feel like celebrating anything."

Chichi put her hands on her hips. "Yes you have to go. Bulma said that Trunks is back and since he defeated the androids in his time line were going to celebrate."

Gohan was glad that Trunks was back and all but he just couldn't shake the feeling of sadness.

"Really? That's great." Said Gohan trying to smile. "I guess I'll go then."

(About an hour later)

Gohan and Chichi both got on the nimbus cloud and left for the lookout.

They were one of the first ones to arrive. Bulma was already there and so was Krillin. Of course Piccolo, Dende, and Mr. Popo were already there since they lived on the lookout.

"Hey guys!" Said Gohan, a bit cheerful for seeing his friends but still hurting inside, of course he hid it well.

"Hey Gohan. Hey Chichi" Responded everybody else.

"So how have you guys been since...you know?" Asked Krillin.

Gohan cringed at the question. He answered trying to sound alright. "Me and mom have been a little sad about it but of course who wouldn't be? But were doing pretty well."

"Yeah. It is sad but life goes on and it's not like we'll never see him again."

Gohan wasn't really listening he was to preoccupied with his own thoughts.

~ If only they knew how I truly feel. But they couldn't possibly understand. I'm more angry at myself for being so stupid. ~

Soon after all of the other z fighters arrived. Even Vegeta was their, although he didn't have much choice since Bulma made him go.

After talking a bit about how Trunks beat the Androids the others started the party. Vegeta, Tien, Chiatzu, and Piccolo were by themselves watching the others. Bulma was feeding baby Trunks at the table. Krillin and Chichi were dancing on the dance floor.

Gohan on the other hand was isolated, by himself trying to sort out his feelings. He was mad, sad, felt guilty and was depressed all at once. It was overwhelming for him. Being like that was giving him a serious headache, that he clutched his head.

He could feel it. He was trying to break free. He didn't know if he could stop him.

The figure that had been hiding in the shadows was watching Gohan smirking.

~ Hehehe. It's not long now. He's about to snap. ~

Well, that was chapter 4. Hope it was interesting! Remember to review!