Letters To My Ex-Jerk
Chapter 23- Welcome Back
"Where the heck is Damon?" Stefan demanded, as we were picking up our luggage in New York. We'd seen him leaving the plane ahead of us and then he'd disappeared into thin air.
"I don't know, Stefan." I replied, as I dragged my bag along and walked alongside Stefan to the Arrivals section. I searched through the crowd for a raven haired blue eyed boy but I couldn't see him anywhere.
The flight had been spent by Stefan and I playing card games like 'Go Fish' and 'Crazy 8' and when we'd asked Damon if he'd wanted to join in, but he just ignored us as if we weren't talking, and then went back to speaking with the blonde. Then when we'd been listening to music, Damon's eyes would stray to us every so often then flash back to his window. I didn't know what was going on. I didn't understand why he was so insulted and mad at me, but I knew it had a whole lot to do with the kiss and the fact that I'd rejected him.
"He's been acting really crazy. He must be really upset about your fight, whatever it was about," Stefan murmured.
"Maybe," I said, not wanting to talk about it anymore or go into any details about it. What Stefan didn't know, wouldn't hurt him.
We approached the Arrivals sections where a crowd had gathered to welcome their loved ones. I saw a girl with long blonde hair and when she came running towards me, her arms wide, I knew it had to be Caroline. I hugged her back, smiling happily that I was back. I'd really missed her.
"BON! I missed you like hell, dude!" She exclaimed, snatching my bag and then giving Stefan a welcome hug too. "You too, Stef," She added.
"We missed you, Caroline," Stefan said, smiling at her nicely.
Caroline grinned. "Of course you did," She replied, as she began to steer us towards the doors of the airport. I can't believe she'd come to pick us up on her own. It just truly proved how good a friend she was. "Wait a second, you had the devil with you. Where is he?" Her eyes narrowed and Stefan and I shared a knowing look.
"He just disappeared," Stefan explained. "He and Bonnie had a fight and he's really upset,"
"Sounds like Damon. He can hold a grudge for like… ever," Caroline explained, sounding bored already about the topic. "Well, he'll find his way home. I made a little get together to welcome you guys back, back at our apartment Bonnie,"
"I think I'd better get home to see what the heck is wrong with Damon. I'm toast anyway," Stefan apologized, "I don't think I can handle a bunch of crazy girls now,"
"Hey!" Caroline smacked his arm with her free hand as we exited the airport. "That's insulting, Matt will be there too. Don't be boring, Stefan," She pouted.
"I'm boring. You can call me Mr. Freaking Tiresome," He replied, causing me and Caroline to giggle a little as we started towards Matt's car which was waiting outside a few parking spaces away.
"Okay Mr. Freaking Tiresome," I responded, teasingly. Caroline opened the trunk of the car and dumped my suitcase inside then Stefan placed his own inside.
Stefan scowled at me mockingly but then he smirked. "I do need a ride home though," He said, fluttering his eyelashes pathetically at Caroline in a way that made me burst out laughing.
Caroline tried to maintain a staid composure for a few seconds but then she was laughing too. "No, we're going to leave you here at the airport for eternity, Stef," She joked, pushing a blonde strand of hair out of her eyes and smirking a very Damon like smile. That reminded me. I needed to talk to her about Damon when we were done with her little 'party'.
"I could just take a taxi," Stefan replied.
"Hmm, good idea," Caroline replied, as she got into the driver's seat. I slipped into the passenger seat, amused at their little banter. It was cute in all different levels. Stefan got into the back and we started out of the airport. I couldn't wait to be back in New York, the concrete jungle where dreams are made as the song ' Empire State of Mind ' quoted.
"So how was California, byotches?" Caroline joked, as she made a U-turn with the car.
"It was good. I got see my childhood friend that Stefan has a thing for now," I smirked back at Stefan whose cheeks got considerably pinker.
Caroline laughed, looking in the rearview mirror at him with a teasing look. "What's her name, Ste- I mean, Romeo?" She asked, raising her blonde eyebrows.
Stefan simpered in the backseat and I felt a little sorry for putting him in the spotlight. "Sarah," He replied, in a sort of happy voice. He seemed to remember something, so he pulled out his cell phone and started to text, probably texting Sarah or something or maybe he just wanted to get the attention off of him.
"Hmm, interesting. WAIT A SECOND, weren't you guys together?" Caroline demanded, swerving to avoid a parked car then starting into the street that had Stefan and Damon's apartment in. It was in one of the quieter New York suburbs, unlike the busy area where Caroline and I lived.
I blushed and Stefan shook his head. We were both silent and Caroline bit her lip. "Awkward. I'm sorry for bringing it up!" She exclaimed, sounding a little bashful but then it was gone in a second when she parked the car, "Okay, it's your stop Romeo," She called, in a fake British accent.
"Why are you talking like that?" Stefan asked, in an annoyed voice.
Caroline turned the force of her bubbly blue eyes on him and he just smirked at her and got out of the car. "Bye Girlies," He said, once he'd yanked his suitcase out of the car, and closed the boot. He waved at us, smiling a little before he started up the steps to the apartment.
"Bye, Mr. Freaking Tiresome!" Caroline and I called at the same time, though Caroline's voice was a little more cheerful than mine was.
"So why did you guys call it quits?" She asked, as she started the car out of Stefan's road and onto a line of traffic. She huffed and rested her head on the driving wheel for a second.
"It got really complicated and besides, Caroline I know you dated Damon and so did I. He was the one who broke my heart, the jerk," I explained, and Caroline's mouth formed an 'o' shape.
"No effing way!" She exclaimed, pushing the car forward slightly so we moved down the line of traffic. Cars honked everywhere and I knew I was back in New York.
"Yes, it's true. Anyway, Stefan and I broke up because… I think I still have feelings for Damon, feelings that will be there forever. Damon and I fought because he kissed me and I pushed him off," I explained, feeling slightly shy that I was exposing my whole soul to someone but it was Caroline and I trusted her and I knew she'd keep my secret. I needed to get it off my chest to someone too.
"Are you stupid? If you like him, why did you do that?" She sounded confused as we pulled into another road, near to our apartment building.
"I don't know. I was confused. But I've decided I'm going to tell him today. I'm going to give him the letters at least. I promised Sarah and myself and I don't break my promises," I felt a flutter of butterflies in my stomach as I thought of the fact that by this time tomorrow, Damon would know how I felt about him. But I couldn't put it off any longer. I needed to tell him the truth or I'd chicken out.
"Good for you," Caroline's smile was encouraging. "I think you should come clean,"
"I will," I gulped as the car stopped and I knew we were home. "Who's at this party anyway?" I asked.
Caroline's eyes twinkled as she got out of the car and slammed the door behind her. "You'll see," She smiled, and then we started upstairs, carrying my luggage.
"WELCOME BACK BONNIE!" The party goers screamed as Caroline and I entered the living room. Party decorations were everywhere and a giant banner than said 'Welcome Home, Bon Bon' was hung on the wall. I felt tears of joy come to my eyes as my friends rushed forward to greet me.
Lexie was the first to come, slipping her arms around my waist and swinging me around. "Welcome back, babe. I'm sorry David couldn't make it; he has work," She exclaimed, as she held onto my shoulders and smiled.
I shook my head. "It's okay. Tell him 'Hi' from me," I said, and she smiled at me and nodded.
"I will, but he said he'll try to stop by later," She explained.
Matt came forward and kissed me on the cheek. "Welcome back home," He replied, and Caroline beamed at us both, slipping her arms around her boyfriend.
"Thanks, I appreciate that," I responded, happy that everyone was being so nice.
Elena and a guy with blonde hair and blue eyes were the last to come forward. Elena flung her arms around my shoulder and I could see she was crying. "I missed you," She explained, dabbing her eyes.
"Drama queen," Caroline scoffed, but Elena just shot her a teasing look, throwing her tissue at her and causing her to squeal. I laughed and so did Matt and Lexie at Caroline's behavior.
"Shut up, Blondie," Elena responded, as she pulled out of my hug. She gestured to the guy beside her. "This is my new boyfriend, Klaus Smith," She explained.
I smiled at him, noticing how breathtakingly gorgeous he was. Of course Elena would have found the hottest guy second to Damon on the universe to date. I reached out my hand to shake it and he bent down and kissed it, "It's a pleasure to meet you, Ms. Bonnie," He responded, in a British accent.
"The pleasure's mine, Mr. Klaus," I laughed, and he did too. Elena and the rest of them joined in and then we were all laughing.
"Okay, let's leave Bonnie to freshen up while I put the finishing touches on lunch," Lexie called and the rest of them nodded and retired to what they were doing before I came. Matt was watching a game on TV, Klaus and Elena were sitting on the loveseat laughing and talking. Caroline sat down next to Matt, placing her head on his shoulder.
I smiled at them before I pulled my suitcase into my room. I sat down on the bed, sighing as I looked around and realized how happy I was to be back. I saw the box with my letters in it peeking out from under the bed and I pushed it under further. I'd deal with them later tonight. I changed into a light green dress that was both comfortable hugged my body in all the right places, making me look innocently curvy and brushed my hair back into a ponytail. I applied light make-up, listening to the chatter from the living room and realizing how lucky I was to have such great friends. This would be perfect if Damon was here. I realized I missed him.
I sat down onto my bed and pulled out the box of letters, finding an empty piece of paper. I got a pen out and started to write my last letter to my ex-jerk, though he had come to be so much more:
Dear My ex-jerk (my dearest Damon),
I know you're mad at me for rejecting you. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I was conflicted inside, confused, and I didn't know what to feel but now I do. I'm in love with you, Damon, and I always will be. What we have is true love, love of the type that doesn't change with time. I know it will always be there. Do you feel the same way about me?
I know I hurt you and that's the last thing I want to do. I'm giving you these letters so you can see the truth of my feelings. So you can understand what I've been feeling all this time, the happy and sad and hateful thoughts I've had about you. I'm bearing my whole soul to you and I am afraid that you do not feel the same way.
At least if you know, I will have tried. I know what we have is special and I never want to loose it. I've lived without you for the past few months and it's been the worst time ever. Whenever I kissed another guy, I imagined it was you. Whenever I danced with another guy, I wished with all my heart for it to be you dancing with me instead.
Read these letters and then tell me what you feel. I love you, Damon.
Sincerely,
Bonnie x
I sighed as I folded the letter neatly. I sealed it with a kiss and placed it in the box with all the other letters, containing my inner thoughts and feelings. But it wouldn't matter anymore. Damon would know the truth, and the truth was, I loved him and I always would.
"Are you okay, Bon?" I whirled to find Elena standing there. I placed a hand on my heart and nodded. I hadn't realized I'd been crying until I wiped my eyes.
"You just shocked me, that's all." I pushed the box of letters under the bed with my leg, but Elena saw it.
"They're to Damon, aren't they? I saw you writing them before and I just know the truth now. Bonnie, you and Damon belong together. You have my blessing to be with him," Elena said.
"I didn't know I needed your blessing," I snapped, causing a hurt look to flash across her face. I touched her arm, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean it.. I'm stressed, tired…" I trailed off.
Elena shook her head. "I deserved it. I've been a total bitch about the whole Damon thing. I'm truly sorry and you deserve every happiness, Bon. Sister's before misters and all that. We should have never let him come between us." She sighed and looked up at me in a way that said 'forgive me?'.
I nodded, "It's okay. And you're right. Our friendship is very important," I murmured, and Elena slipped her arm around my shoulder and started to lead me out of the room.
"Agreed," She whispered, a big smile on her face. "Guys, she's not dead!" She exclaimed and I rolled my eyes.
"Okay, okay… Come to the table, girls. I think Matt and Klaus have finished all the food," Lexie called.
"They're freaking pigs," Caroline stated, a daring look on her face.
Both boys didn't even respond; they just shoveled some more spaghetti bolognaise into their mouths. I laughed as I settled down in a seat beside Caroline and Lexie. Elena took her place beside her boyfriend, patting him on the back. "Don't worry, nobody's going to take it from you," She promised jokily.
Klaus looked up at her with a slight smirk for a second before he continued eating, "Very funny, sweetheart," He responded, when he was done with the mouthful.
Lexie handed me a plate of my own and she smiled. "Tell me what you think about it. It's my own homemade recipe," She explained.
"I'm sure it's amazing, Lexie," I replied, as I picked up my fork and started to eat. And it was. It was a perfect blend of the tomato sauce, pasta and minced meat. It was the best plate of spaghetti I'd ever tasted. I told her that and Caroline grinned from beside me, taking a sip of 7-up.
"Yeah yeah, Lex is a freaking culinary goddess. Just another thing she does better than me," Caroline rolled her eyes. "See what I had to deal with my whole life," She gestured to her sister who mirrored her rolling of the eyes.
I laughed at their similarities as I ate some more food.
"Drinks anyone?" Matt asked, holding up the 7-up bottle in one hand and the Dr. Pepper in another. He served us all drinks and sat back down.
"So when do you guys get back to college?" Lexie asked, once we were all done with our food and were sitting in the living room area.
"In a few days," I replied at the same time as Caroline said "Way too soon,"
"I hear you, sister," Elena joked, as she held her drink up and took a big gulp. I was happy they were getting along.
Lexie rolled her eyes. "I'll have you know I loved college, girls," She explained.
"You loved college girls? Lex, does David know about this?" Caroline teased, causing us all to laugh.
Lexie rolled her eyes again at her sister's antics. "Shut up Caroline. Or do you want me to break out the family photo albums?" She shot her a sickening sweet smile.
"I'd love to see them," I put in and Matt nodded: "Me too,"
"They're back home in Virginia," Caroline replied, before she glared at us both, causing us to chuckle.
"I made copies, little sis, so watch out," Lexie responded, coolly.
"Oooh, Caroline," Elena exclaimed, giggling.
Caroline glared down at the floor, then smirked. "Well, there's some pictures of you too, Lex. Let me warn you guys, she wasn't always such a looker," She teased her sister.
Lexie was about to reply when I held my hands up. "And I declare a truce to the Forbes sister wars," I called out, and Elena nodded.
"I agree," She smiled. "So how about we change the subject? Guys, you know Klaus is transferring to the NYU," An excited look appeared on her face.
"Yes, and he was in England before?" Matt asked, politely. "Have you been to Manchester before?" His love for English soccer took over him.
"Yes, I saw a few football games there. I lived in a little place called Richmond though," Klaus explained, his accent prominent.
"It's a romantic little town," Elena exclaimed, bubbling over. "Klaus promised to take me there once, right, K?"
"Right my darling," He responded, hugging her close to his chest. I was reminded once again of how I needed to go and give the letters to Damon if I ever wanted to find true love.
"Good for you," Caroline put in, smiling at them both.
"Might I ask how you two met?" I asked, curious.
"That's a good question," Lexie put in and Elena blushed.
"Well, it's kind of typical but I was signing up for classes for the next semester and he was there in the office. It was…" She trailed off.
"Love at first sight," Klaus responded, smiling at her warmly.
"Aww," Lexie, Caroline and I responded, causing Elena to blush a warm pink. She seemed to really like him and I was happy about that.
Matt scoffed and Caroline smacked him in the arm. "Matt doesn't have a romantic bone in his body," She explained, but she was only teasing. I knew she loved Matt truly.
"Sounds like somebody I know called David. Tragic, isn't it?" Lexie sniffed but then she laughed.
The doorbell rang and she got up to answer it. She looked through the peephole and laughed again. "Speak of the devil and he shall appear," She muttered, before she opened the door for her boyfriend, jumping into his arms and kissing him on the cheek.
"Hello, love. There's some food on the table. I was just about to go prepare dessert," Lexie exclaimed, and David nodded, coming over to say hi to us all before he sat down at the table to eat. Lexie slipped into the kitchen.
"I feel like we should be making the food, Care, and not your sister. It's our house," I smiled and Caroline just shook her head.
"We'll get food poisoning if Caroline cooks," Matt complained.
Klaus laughed. "I'm sure her cooking isn't that bad," He murmured, snuggling Elena into his side.
Matt nodded. "Believe me, it is. She once made an apple pie, and it tasted of spinach," He explained.
Caroline glared at him, "You will pay for this later," She warned him.
I laughed. "I'd watch out if I were you, Matt," I warned jokily and Matt just rolled his eyes and flicked his eyes back to the TV for a few seconds before smirking.
"Yes, she might unleash the power of blonde on you," Elena joked and Caroline whimpered.
"You guys are so mean to me!" She exclaimed.
"I wasn't being mean. I stood up for you," Klaus said, nobly.
"Thank you, Klaus. You're my only friend then," Caroline alternated glaring at me and Matt making us both laugh.
Lexie came in with a tray of éclairs and a couple of plates. "YUM, Eclairs! I love you, Lex," Caroline explained, her previous comment forgotten.
Lexie looked at her warily. "I love you too," She responded, as she placed the tray on the table and then handed each one of us a plate. David had finished eating by now and retired to the sitting room, taking a seat on an empty armchair. Everyone helped themselves to the éclairs and soon we were chomping happily down on the treats. There was no doubt about it, Lexie was an awesome cook. I remembered her beef casserole that was to die for.
"And I'll love you more when you wash the dishes up. I don't want any more cockroaches crawling into me and David's apartment, Care. Remember last time when you left the fudge truffles out?" Lexie exclaimed, shivering slightly.
"I was drunk and tired. It won't happen again. Besides, it's not my fault they crawled into your bedroom and flew into your bedcovers," Caroline responded, snappily. She folded her arms across her chest before she took a big bite of éclair and sighed at its beautiful taste.
Lexie shivered a few times and David hugged her close to him. "I won't let the cockroaches get you, Lex," He kissed her lightly on the lips and I smiled at their interactions.
I looked at the clock. It was 11:45 PM now so I had to get my butt over to Stefan and Damon's apartment to give Damon the letters and make sure he was still alive. "Elena, could I ask you a favor?" I asked, getting up, and placing my plate on the table.
Elena nodded and flitted to my side in a second. "Sure, what do you need?" I ushered her into my room and closed the door.
"Well, I'm going to give Damon the letters now so I need you to call him and make sure he's in," I pleaded, sounding worried and anxious at the same time. I was sweating a little because I was nervous.
Elena smiled, "You're doing the right thing," She said, as she pulled the cell phone out of her pocket and pressed some buttons. Then she scrolled down and placed it to the side of her head.
She waited, pacing in front of the bed and I sat down, biting my lip.
"Umm.. hello?" She said a few seconds later. "Hey Damon! Welcome back to New York… Good…. Did you have fun?... Hmm… I'm sorry about that… Are you home now?... I was thinking of stopping by" She laughed then," … aha… okay… maybe tomorrow then… okay, Good night… bye,"
I turned to her. "What's the verdict?"
"He's at home but he's tired and is going to bed in a while so he doesn't want me to come over," Elena said, "But I'm sure he won't mind if it's you,"
I nodded, sighing. I picked up the box of letters and slipped them into my bag before I grabbed my phone and switched my slippers for sandals. "Okay, I'm heading out…" I reached in to hug her, and she hugged me back.
"I'm worried, Elena," I whispered as we exited my bedroom and hurried into the living room.
"Everything's going to be perfect, Bon. I can tell," Elena replied, her big brown eyes honest.
I gulped. "I hope so," I whispered again.
"Guys, I'm heading out to do something… I'll be back," I called to all my friends. Caroline rushed out towards me.
"Where're you going?" She wanted to know.
"I'm going to give Damon the letters," I whispered to her, and her eyes widened with excitement.
"Oh! YES!" She exclaimed, causing Matt, Lexie, Klaus and David to stare at her like she was insane. "Bonnie's going to pick up toilet paper," She explained, and they looked even more weirded out and I couldn't blame them.
I laughed, "I'll be right back," I insisted.
"Take David's car," Caroline suggested, and David nodded.
"It wouldn't be safe to take public transportation at this time of night," He said.
"Are you sure?" I asked and he nodded and flipped me the car keys.
I took them thankfully, and started out of the apartment after Elena and Caroline squeezed my shoulders encouragingly. I was glad they'd be there for me to fall back on if the worst happened. I'd never felt more loved.
I felt my phone buzz when I was in the car, starting the engine so I snuck a peek at the small screen. It was a message from Sarah. God, I'd forgotten to call her. And now I didn't have time. I had to get to Damon before he went to sleep or I'd never get the guts to give him the letter. I looked at the message though:
Hey Bon-Bon. I hope you arrived safely. I love you and please give me a call when you can! Sarah xxoxxo
I smiled and quickly typed a reply:
I'm going to give Damon the letters and tell him what I feel. Wish me good luck, Ara. I'll call you ASAP. Mwah! Bonnie x
I sent it, and started driving towards Stefan and Damon's apartment. Traffic sucked so I was there in 15 minutes even though they lived only a few blocks away. I parked the car, and felt a nervous flutter in my stomach. I felt sick to the core but I knew I wouldn't regret was I was about to do.
I pressed the doorbell of their apartment and Stefan came to the door, a small smile on his face. "Hey Bonnie. What's up?" He asked, and I wondered to myself why I hadn't called Stefan to check if Damon was there or not. The idea had slipped my mind completely.
"Everything's great but I'm here to talk to Damon,"
"He headed to bed a while earlier. He's been really cold though since we got back. He took a taxi home," Stefan explained as he let me in, closing the door behind me.
"I'll deal with him. Are you sure he's asleep?" I asked, as Stefan settled down on the couch with some sort of book he was reading.
"Well, maybe he was just trying to get away from my questioning about his weird mood," He explained.
"Hmm, I'll see then," I said, "Which room is it?" I asked, looking around the very classy looking apartment. I'd thought Damon's family didn't have money but I guess they were able to fork out enough to pay for this apartment which was actually very nice though it was small.
"2nd room on the left," Stefan called to me, never removing his eyes from the book.
"Thanks buddy," I replied, and Stefan snorted at the term I'd used.
I grinned too and I stopped in front of the door to Damon's room. I paused, shifting my bag from hand to hand. I felt scared, I realized. I wasn't scared of him though. I was scared of what he could do to me and to my heart. I raised my hand gently, hesitantly, and knocked on the door firmly. I didn't get a reply. I knocked again.
"What do you want, Stefan?" Damon's annoyed voice came from inside.
I took that as a cue to enter. Shielding my eyes in case he was undressed or something, I entered the room. I could feel his eyes boring into me as I stepped into the room.
"Are you proper?" I asked, keeping my eyes closed.
I could hear the smile in Damon's voice. "Depends what you mean by that, but I am dressed if that's the meaning you're going for," He replied, his tone turning cold by the end of the sentence as if he remembered he was supposed to be mad at me or something.
I opened my eyes and looked over to where Damon was seated on the bed, a laptop on his lap. He was dressed in some navy blue pajama pants and he placed the laptop to the side as I stepped forward. "What are you doing here, Bennett?" He asked.
So we're on a last name basis, huh? I thought to myself amusedly. "I'm here to see you and talk to you… and give you something," I pulled the box of letters from inside my bag.
"What is that?" He asked, unable to stop the curiosity from bulging out of his eyes as I offered him the box. It was now or never. I let him take it, hoping I wasn't making the biggest mistake in my life.
"Letters to you. Don't read them until I leave…" I murmured, Damon was silent as he looked at the box. Then he closed the laptop and just stared at me.
"I'm sorry for rejecting you, Damon," I said, then I turned on my heel and started out of the room and away from the most important thing in my life at the moment, I realized.
"I talked to him. He should be okay in a while," I promised Stefan who looked up at me curiously.
"Are you crying, Bonnie?" He asked, and I felt warm tears slip down my cheeks. I wiped them away, not knowing why I was in tears for the second time that day.
"No, Stefan. I'll call you tomorrow," I promised, then I ran out of the room and away from their apartment building not even knowing where I was going. I just felt incredibly dizzy and sick and my thoughts were muddled. I felt the cold wind against my arms but I just kept on going, running. I saw some sort of lights, lights I should have realized were headlights as I stepped forward. But I was too exhausted and confused to think rationally.
I heard the sickening squeal of tires and felt something crash against me with such momentum I was flung backwards. I heard a thud, a crack, and something wet and warm emanated from all the parts of my body I could feel. I heard screaming and cars beeping, but I didn't want to hang onto it; I didn't want to exist in reality. I was too tired to remember anything. I didn't even know where I was. Before I knew it, I was engulfed by the darkness, taking comfort in its dark ways.
A/N: And that's the end of chapter 23… What a warm welcome back to New York hmmm.. This is an awful cliffhanger I know, but I'll try to update soon! xD
Leave me a REVIEW with your opinion! The next chapter will be shocking and fast paced so watch out (:
Thanks for reading… I hope you liked it!
Lily xx
Disclaimer: I. Don't. Own. ..!