Thanks to my amazing beta.
It was early morning in New York, the sun just beginning to rise over the city. Beckett was asleep, her face buried in the pillows. She was alone, Castle on a short book tour in LA. Her eyes opened and a smile spread on her face when she heard her son babbling over the baby monitor. Her feet hit the cool, wood floor in a hurry to see him. She slid open the study door to greet Hudson who was grabbing for the Winnie the Pooh mobile until he saw his momma's face. He smiled and giggled at her happily.
"Hey there." She smiled as she picked him up, his little feet kicking in the air. He rested his head on her shoulder. Heading Into the lounge, she walked over to the bouncer in the middle of the room. She placed the baby in the seat carefully, "Hey buddy, let's have a little play in here while momma gets some coffee, alright? She sat at the table, drinking coffee and reading the newspaper. Hudson was playing in his bouncer, babbling from across the room. "You getting tired of playing by yourself, bubba?" Hudson answered her by babbling and letting out a squeal. "Alright, here I come." Beckett picked him up from the bouncer and laid him down on the play mat.
She lifted up his arms, "You ready, yeah?" She took a big breath and blew a raspberry on his belly. He laughed in delight. When she made eye contact with him, he reached out for her face. Kate gave him little kisses over and over, making him laugh.
She only wished that Rick could be here to share moments like these; just the little things like quiet moments in the morning, and playing with their son. But he would be home soon, and he could catch up with them.
She heard the phone ring from across the loft. She placed her son back in the bouncer and raced to the phone. She hoped it was him, telling her he was coming home. All she wanted was to kiss him. "Hello?" She caught it on the second ring, eager to hear Castle's voice.
"Hey babe." His husky voice spoke through to Kate's phone. "Hey, look, I have to stay a few extra days, Gina is making me." He sounded nervous.
Kate took a step and crossed her arms, "Oh."
"What?"
"It's just, it's been almost two weeks. I miss you, and Hudson misses you." She could feel herself getting emotional.
"I know, I'm sorry. I want to be home with you and Hudson more than anything. I miss you two so much it hurts."
"I have to go." She was about to hang up when Castle responded.
"Kate, don't go. Talk to me, please." He was pleading with her, knowing how she was when it came to difficult situations.
"You've already been gone for two weeks, and you're missing so much of our son's life.
"I'm sorry, sweetie. I really am." Castle didn't know what else to say; he was stuck between a rock and a hard place. He wanted to see his family, but this was his job and if Gina was mad, he was in trouble.
"No you're not. You were upset when Meredith did this to you; always leaving and never being in your child's life."
"Don't bring her into this! That is completely different!" He was getting irritated, not knowing why Kate was acting this way.
"How is it different?" She was pacing back and forth in the loft, trying to keep her voice down so not to scare Hudson.
"Meredith was cheating on me. It hurt, so stop acting like I'm doing the same, because I would never do that to you."
"You know what hurts? Knowing you would rather sign women's chests all day than be at home with your family." She could feel tears in her eyes as she continued pacing.
"Now you're just being irrational. I've changed and you know that."
"I have to go. Bye." She chewed on her bottom lip and ran a hand through her hair.
"I love you." He tried one last time to get her to listen
Kate hung up the phone, too mad to answer him. She knew she was being irrational, but she couldn't help it. The sensitivity and emotions that followed giving birth were too much for her to handle. It was like she was a completely different person than she had grown into. All she wanted was for her husband to be here with her to watch Hudson grow and smile and be ridiculously cute.
She let unrealistic fears creep into her brain. What if he wants to be gone? What if he's not happy being here? Her mind and heart did a dance, weighing the questions that sat at the back of her mind.
Hudson started to cry,it's like he knew,she walked over to the bouncer and put him over her shoulder,"I'm sorry,I'm so sorry".