"I can do Hawaii too," Deeks said quickly, getting in a nano-second before Callen. "In a wetsuit. And on a surfboard."

"Show-off." Callen had once appeared in a wetsuit, but that seemed to have passed the fans by. Mainly because he'd looked a good deal like a seal in it. Not a Navy SEAL, just a seal. Or maybe it was a sealion?

"You get all the flashy cars. Why shouldn't I get Hawaii? Look how long it took for me to get the cool black, extra-large watch." That had really rankled with Deeks, even if they did look something you'd give to a first grader.

"You're not an agent," Sam reminded him. "Remember?"

"I never get to go abroad," Deeks said disconsolately. This was a major new development for NCIS: Los Angeles, and a rather risky move. So far they'd concentrated on being brave and resourceful, with only occasional forays into wistfulness and brief interludes of minor angst, but Shane had gone out on a limb and decreed that disconsolate was the way to go. Along with explosions, of course. That went without saying. "You and Callen get to go abroad all the time." He was pushing disconsolate for all it was worth.

Sam gave him a pitying look. It was not dissimilar to the one Mr T used just before he uttered the immortal phrase 'fool', only without with the jewellery or the Mohawk. If Deeks could do disconsolate, then he could do the A-Team. "It's not really abroad, Deeks. It's just pretend-abroad. We never actually leave California."

"Hawaii's not abroad either. And I still want to go there."

"So do I." Kensi eyeballed him. That was infinitely preferable to her other method of disarming men, which was to crash her knee in their balls, so Deeks counted himself lucky. Mind you, he knew that Kensi wanted him in full working order for later on. "And Shane asked me first."

"Maybe Shane changed his mind?"

"Maybe you should all remember you're about to go to Prague? And you might not all come back?" Shane longed for the good old days, when gods had gaily flung thunderbolts all around the place. They must have made a really satisfyingly loud bang when they landed, he thought.

"How about the plane blows up on the way back from Hawaii?" Callen thought this was a masterstroke – Shane would get his cross-over episode and a really huge explosion into the bargain.

"How about you shut up?" Kensi flexed her knee in a menacing fashion.

"Do any of you remember the read-through we had for this episode?" Shane asked. "The one with the script? Well, how about sticking to it, alright?" He'd paid good money for that script.

"Improvisation can be good."

"It can be. But this isn't. So get back to work and stick to the lines."

Deeks held out his hand. "Can I have my list back, please?"

"In a minute." Shane studied it carefully. "Okay, I'll do you a deal. First one to spot the glaring omission gets to go to Hawaii."

In an instant they were all peering at the screen.

"How about Kensi's wonderful smile?" she suggested modestly.

"It's crooked," Sam reminded her. "How about my chicken-pox scar, next to my nose?"

Shane favoured him with a smile. "Close, but that's not going to put a shrimp on the barbie."

"It has to be the leading man's effortless charm and the fact he should be with Kensi?" Callen looked at them. "Come on, you know there are stories about that. Don't deny it."

"That's called wishful thinking, remember? And don't forget there's also stories about you and me getting it on, G. And we really don't want to go there, do we?" Sam felt ever so slightly sick at the very prospect. If he was going to have man-love with anyone, Deeks was so much more his type.

Deeks grinned at him. "I don't know. All those times Callen's checked you out at the urinals have to count for something, don't they?" He concentrated on the list. "It's either Hetty's ubiquitous pants suits or my sex appeal."

"You're all useless. Not even close. Call yourself agents?" It wasn't too late to do some wholescale recasting, was it?

"Technically, I'm not an agent. Not yet."

"Technically, we're fictional characters, Deeks. Or should I say 'Eric Christian'? And exactly why do you have two names, by the way?"

"One name wasn't enough. I'm so good they named me twice."

Shane glared at Callen. "You might be fictional, mate, but I'm bloody real. And I'm the boss around here." There was no arguing with that. Not if you fancied keeping your kneecaps where they belonged. "Okay – you all give up, do you? You lot have the observational skills of a dingo on crack."

Anyone want to hazard a guess about what's missing?