CHAPTER 44

Hush, baby don't cry

Just get through this night

Overcome

Cause all that you are

Is broken inside

But they'll never know

They'll never know

"Arizona?"

Callie stood outside their bathroom waiting patiently for Arizona to respond her soft knockings on the door. The blonde had been in there for what seemed like an eternity. It was Monday morning and both of them were heading to the hospital. Callie was about to get back to work and Arizona was about to meet Chief Webber and some members of the board. Their weekend was officially over. She knew that Arizona was far from being okay but somehow they had been able to not talk about this whole mess with Nathalie Porter over the weekend. In fact they hadn't been talking much at all about anything. Callie had felt that it was the blonde's wish and she had respected that. But now, when reality was back to hit them in their faces again it was inevitable and the brunette knew it. Arizona Robbins was a strong person but this was even out of her league and the brunette was worried about her.

"Baby, are you done?"

Callie tried the doorknob and found that the door was unlocked. Arizona was in the shower or correction, still in the shower. The brunette's heart sank in her chest when she laid eyes on her lover. The blonde didn't even seem to have noticed that Callie had entered the room. The brunette quickly realized that the water running down on Arizona's body wasn't exactly warm. The lack of steam in the room revealed that.

"Hey!"

Arizona blinked one or two times when the doors to the shower glided apart and Callie showed up in front of her.

"Baby, you're freezing! Are you okay?" Callie rambled on with obvious worry in her voice.

The brunette was met by an empty glance from the blonde's baby blue eyes. Instead of saying anything else Callie grabbed a towel and swept it around her girlfriend in an attempt to get Arizona warm. She didn't care the slightest that her clothes became wet when their bodies connected. All she cared about now was to hold Arizona close.

"I-I..-" The blonde's voice broke and soon her tears started running down her face.

In that exact moment Callie felt like her heart was shattered in to a million pieces. Arizona had been crying before but this was extraordinary. And not in a good way. Callie could feel the tears from Arizona soaking her shirt where her girlfriend's face was buried on her left shoulder.

"Shhh" Callie soothed and stroked Arizona's back in a weak attempt to reduce the crying. "It's going to be okay baby. I promise."

"I'm so sorry" the blonde sobbed. "So, so sorry."

Callie stiffened up a bit and leaned back to lock eyes with Arizona. She used both her hands to cup the blonde's tear stricken face. Her fingers tangled slightly in Arizona's wet and cold hair.

"Listen to me", the brunette started in a soft and low voice. "You have nothing to be sorry about. And this is going to be okay."

Arizona's eyes shimmered with tears but the crying had subsided for the moment. The sincerity and love she could hear in Callie's voice made her heart swell in her chest. Everything they had been through these last couple of months had been rough on both of them with the Africa-thing, her coming back from there and their therapy sessions but they had made it. They were back together. And now, when they finally had reached some sort of stabile ground, this Nathalie Porter had come along. Arizona suddenly felt so helpless, so lost in her own life. Like everything was out of her control. She wasn't use to not being the one in control. Now it seemed that someone else was in control. Now someone else was in charge of what was about to happen in her life. The only thing, the only one that kept her going was Callie.

"I'm scared", she confessed while trying to press the sobs away.

"I know you are" Callie said softly. "But you know what? I'm not going anywhere. Can you trust me on this one?"

Arizona's feelings were reeling inside her body. The knowledge that Callie always seemed to know what she meant without her even trying to explain was beyond her. She was scared. Scared that Nathalie Porter was going to get her fired but mostly she was scared that Callie was going to leave her. She didn't know were this insecurity was coming from though. Arizona Robbins had never ever in her whole life been afraid of being alone. Never ever had she been thinking about the fact that she one day would be so vulnerable and so attached to another human being that she was when she were around Calliope Torres. The fear she felt when she thought about the possibility that Callie would leave made it hard to breath.

"I do trust you", she whispered trying to hold her voice steady. "This weekend you have done nothing but to prove it. It's been an amazing weekend. With you."

"I don't think you even know how much I love you" Callie whispered back breathlessly.

Arizona inhaled sharply but didn't have the chance to reply because Callie continued.

"You are the reason that my heart is beating. Feel this."

The brunette took one of Arizona's hands in her own and guided it to let the blonde feel her steady heartbeats.

"Never in my whole life I've felt something so right" Callie continued still holding her gaze steady in to Arizona's eyes. "I know in my heart that this, you and me, are the real deal. We're meant to be. Time can go by and this Nathalie Porter can try to break you, try to break us but we're going to stand still. Together. Because you know what? I'm complete when I'm with you. Before you I'm not even sure there was a me."

"God, baby…" Arizona stuttered. "I-I love you so much. I'm not even sure of what to say…"

"Then don't" the brunette said tenderly and leaned in to place a soft kiss on the blonde's lips. "Don't say anything. Just believe me. Deal?"

"Deal" Arizona murmured and let her self relax completely in Callie's arms and leaned against her girlfriend's shoulder yet again.

Callie kissed the top of the blonde's head.

"Let's just focus on the important things here", she said in a low voice. "And do you know what that is?"

"You and me" the blonde replied.

Callie leaned back to once again meet her lovely girlfriends look.

"And we are Callie and Arizona and we can do anything as long as we're together, right?"

This time Arizona's smile reached her eyes.

"Right" she said. "Cause we are Callie and Arizona."

The blonde couldn't help it but a small giggle escaped her mouth when Callie held up one of her hands to high five her.

"You're crazy" Arizona laughed.

"Hey!" Callie protested. "What did we just agreed on? What are we?"

The blonde's expression changed in to a more serious one. Well, at least she tried to.

"We are Callie and Arizona. And we can do anything."

"Right" the brunette stated. So?"

"Fine" the blonde smiled. "High five!"

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"So, Dr Robbins, how do you reply to this accusation that has been thrown at you?"

Arizona stared bluntly at Mr. Jennings who just had put the question out free for her to answer. They were in Chief Webber's office, just the three of them. She was seated in one of the rooms couches situated in the corner. Before she opened her mouth to answer she got an encouraged look from Chief Webber.

"It's not true" Arizona finally said. "I haven't done anything wrong."

She knew deep in her heart that Mr. Jennings liked her. Ever since that thing with Wallace's parents and the 25 million dollar donation and her Carter Madison grant she was one of Mr. Jennings favorites even if he had a hard time showing it. Still, she also knew that this situation was a tough one, cause it was word against word.

"I had a feeling you were going to say something like that", Mr. Jennings said.

"Had you preferred to hear me say something else?" Arizona questioned.

"No, no. I didn't mean it like that" Seattle Grace Mercy West's president of the board quickly replied. "But you have to understand that this really isn't that easy."

"I know that" Arizona stated. "Trust me. I know that. But this is ridiculos. I've been here for two years, I love my job and I'm involved with someone else and we're about to get married. I just turned the girl down. It's not my fault she got offended or that her ego was bruised. I like my life the way it is and I have no intentions to do anything to destroy that."

"Sounds reasonable" Chief Webber interjected. "But like Mr. Jennings just have explained, this is not an easy thing to solve. Dr Porter sticks with her version. We just talked to her again before you got here. And I'm really, really sorry to say this Dr Robbins…but I think it's for the best if you got yourself a lawyer."

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"There must be something wrong with this girl. Seriously!"

Arizona smiled gratefully at Teddy Altman who sat in front of her in the cafeteria looking really annoyed.

"But Chief Webber is going to let you work through this whole process, right?" Teddy asked.

"Well, that's the problem" Arizona sighed out. "I just called my lawyer. It's going to take him about one or two weeks to get this thing going. Until then, I can't work."

"And when the thing is going then?" Teddy asked again. "Then what?"

"Then I can work as usual" Arizona explained. "When the process has begun I can work again. But Chief Webber and Mr. Jennings don't think it's a good idea for me to be here for the time being. Mostly for my own sake."

"Mostly for your sake?" Teddy frowned. "What about her then? Is she going to work?"

Arizona cleared her throat before she answered.

"Well, yeah…but that's because she is the one who are accusing me. I'm pointed out to be the bad guy here."

Teddy's body language softened and she put her hand over Arizona's.

"I'm really sorry about this. What are you going to do?"

The blonde shrugged her shoulders and sighed once again.

"I don't know. I was thinking about going to see my parents. Just this week."

"And what does Callie have to say about that?" Teddy said cautiously.

"I haven't exactly told her or discussed this with her yet" Arizona said sheepishly. "But she is having a rough week with several complicated surgeries and I just feel like I don't want to be here right now. I need to breathe. And get away from Seattle seems like a good idea…"

"Really?" the cardio surgeon said doubtfully. "Somehow I doubt that Callie's going to see this the way you do."

"Somehow I doubt that too" the blonde responded sounding very despondent.

"Well, good luck with that" Teddy said and quickly rose for her chair when she spotted the orthopedic surgeon across the room.

Arizona turned her head and saw Callie coming towards them.

"Thank you Teddy, I really feel your support on this one" she said and smiled to show her best friend that she was joking. "You sure you not going to stay for this?"

"Ha!" the cardio surgeon exclaimed. "No way, I'm out of here! Talk to you later?"

And with that she left and walked the opposite direction from where Callie came from.

"What was that all about?" Callie asked and raised her eyebrows. "Is she mad at me or something? She left awfully quickly when she saw me coming."

"Well, hello to you to" Arizona joked. "And no, she just had to leave."

"Sorry" Callie smiled and squeezed the blonde's shoulder softly before she plopped her self down in the same chair Teddy just had been sitting on. "Are you okay?"

The brunette looked suspiciously at Arizona before the blonde answered.

"Umm…yeah", Arizona started. "Well, we can discuss what okay means but you know…"

"Spit it out Robbins. I can see that there is something you would like to tell me" Callie said nicely but with a firm voice. "I am not going to like this am I?"

"You know me too well", Arizona protested vaguely. "It's not fair."

"That's just what happens when you're with me" Callie replied softly and leaned in closer to the blonde and reached for one of her hands. "Now tell me what's on your lovely mind. And what did Chief Webber and Mr. Jennings say this morning?"

Arizona let another sigh slip out and she started to play with the brunette's fingers in her hand.

"I've just called my lawyer. Nathalie sticks with her story and since it's me that's being accused I can't work at least until this process is started. It's too much of a risk for me to be here before. And I agree…"

"You agree?" Callie said but sounded very doubtfully.

"I just don't want to make this worse" the blonde tried to explain. "So I was thinking…maybe I shouldn't be here right now. Like I mean…not being here. In Seattle I mean."

Arizona closed her eyes and inhaled sharply before she faced Callie again to see the brunette's reaction.

"Y-you want to leave Seattle?" Callie questioned.

"Just for the week!" Arizona hurried to say. "I was thinking I could go see my parents. I mean, you have surgeries and work to focus on and I…I just need to get away from here. To think and breathe a little."

Callie's mind was working hard. She didn't want Arizona to leave. But she was going to have to see this from the blonde's point of view. And maybe…maybe this was for the best.

"I'm going to miss you", the brunette said in a small voice. "Like really miss you…"

"Y-you're okay with this?" Arizona said sounding very surprised.

"Not okay at all" Callie said softly. "But I love you and I want you to be okay."

Once again Arizona was struck by the fact how much Callie really loved her. Her eyes became wet with tears from the feelings the brunette created in her.

"I love you. Have I told you that lately?" she whispered and leaned in to give Callie a hug.

"Yes you have" the brunette whispered back and stroked Arizona's back. "But you can tell me again. When do you leave?"

Feeling Callie kiss and smell her hair the blonde once again relaxed in her lover's arms.

"I know you're on call until tomorrow…so I was thinking about taking a flight to Washington tonight."

"God I'm going to miss you" Callie sighed out and hugged the blonde harder.

"I'm going to miss you too", the blonde confessed. "More than you could ever know."

They let go of each other and just sat in silence for a couple of seconds to regain control over their feelings.

"Do you realize that this is going to be the first time we're apart since we got back together for real again?" Callie said and tried to smile. "And do you know another thing I was thinking about?"

The blonde shook her head and waited for the brunette to tell her what she meant. Before Callie continued she leaned in close so that her mouth and warm breath was close to Arizona's ear.

"I'm thinking about how wonderful it's going to be when you will get back here. When you're home again. With me. Where you're supposed to be."

The blonde felt her body respond immediately to Callie's words and goose bumps appeared on her arms to the brunette's warm breath on her neck.

"Really?" she said with a great interest. "And when I get back, what exactly are we going to do?"

"That's for me to know" Callie whispered and kissed Arizona just below the ear. "And for you to find out…"