Chapter 18

Before anyone really knew it, Friday Morning was upon us, Mr Schue had made a list with who was singing in the morning and in the afternoon. Rachel was very happy when she found out we were going to be one of the last to perform. Quinn and Santana however was in the group going first, which didn't seem to faze her. I had been getting constant updates on Alison but so far nothing had really been declared.

Everything that was going on with Alison made it hard to focus on tasks at hand, like singing how Rachel wanted and doing school work but I was getting there. Word about the Finn and Rachel breakup had spread fast, no one knew why the broke up and this made excellent debating conversation; according to Maya anyway. Walking into the auditrom with Quinn on my arm, Santana, Brittany and Maya were trailing behind us. Quinn was whispering different little things into my ear, some making me laugh/smile and others making me look at her like she had two heads.

"Fields!" I heard being shouted from the staged and I looked up to see Rachel waving me over to her. However, Rachel's appearance was throwing me off, her hair was no longer brown and it was now bright red. Rachel was also wearing a baggy white shirt with a flannel on top of it, blue jeans and black sneakers finished her look off.

"That's new," Maya states.

I smile and say, "I can't believe she actually did it."

"Was that was your idea?" Quinn asked confused.

I replied with "Sort of, it was a stupid bet. I wasn't actually going to hold her to it, I never do." I shake my head and make my way up stage to where Rachel was standing.

"I can't believe you actually went through with it," I say once closer.

Rachel replied with "I wasn't, I know you'd never hold me to it. But I just needed a change; you know a new look with this new me. Does it really look good?"

"Heck yes, I welcome you to the stereotype," I smile making Rachel tip her head back with laughter.

Mr Schue then walked out onto the stage saying "Alright, everyone. Thank-you for being on time, can you please take a seat." Everyone moves to take a seat, I go to sit next to Quinn who instantly wraps an arm around my shoulder and I am more than happy to rest my head upon her shoulder.

"Please welcome our judges," we clap our hands when Coach Beastie and Ms Pillsbury walked out on stage. The pair took a seat in the front room, designated for them.

Mr Schue explained "Both judge will rate each performance out of ten; they will keep it to themselves. At the end of everyone performance scores will be revealed, if there is a tied score then the pair will battle it out with a new song; right on the spot." The rules seemed fair; there was a plan in case a tie was to happen.

Mr Schue spoke "Finn and I are going first," I nod my head already knowing that. Mr Schue probably wanted to see us all perform without having to focus on his own performance, so it did make sense. The pair grabbed a stool and once they were ready with microphones in hands, they signal the band and music began playing.

Finn: "I won't lie to you; I know she's just not right for you. And you can tell me if I'm off, but I see it on your face when you say that she's the one that you want." I wasn't surprised that Finn had chosen this song, or that he would start the song. By the look upon Mr Schue face he had no idea Finn was going to change the lyrics from he too she.

Mr Schue: "And you're spending all your time, in this wrong situation and anytime you want it to stop," while Mr Schue performed he looked a little confused.

Finn and Mr Schue: "I know I can treat you better than she can and any girl like you deserves a gentleman. Tell me why are we wasting time, on all your wasted crying. When you should be with me instead, I know I can treat you better, better than she can." Their voice did blend nicely to each other however Mr Schue appeared to have no idea what he was singing about anymore. Lucky for Finn's sake he was able to mask it and change the lyrics as they sang.

Finn: "I'll stop time for you, the second you say you'd like me to," Finn was really starting to puncture his words at Rachel, he sang directly at Rachel.

Mr Schue: "I just wanna give you the loving you're missing. Baby, just wake up with you."

Finn: "Would be everything I need and this could be so different; tell me what you want to do."

Finn and Mr Schue: "Cause I know I can treat you better than she can and any girl like you deserves a gentleman. Tell me why are we wasting time, on all your wasted crying. When you should be with me instead, I know I can treat you better, better than she can." This time during the chorus, Finn stood up knocking his stool backwards; scaring a few people. As the song, intensive so did Finn and his enthusiasm to the song.

Finn: "Better than she can," he actually point to me and everyone turned to look at me; I did nothing in response for now.

Mr Schue: "Give me a sign, take my hand, we'll be fine."

Finn: "Promise I won't let you down, just know that you don't. Have to do this alone, promise I'll never let you down."

Finn and Mr Schue: "Cause I know I can treat you better than she can and any girl like you deserves a gentleman. Tell me why are we wasting time, on all your wasted crying. When you should be with me instead, I know I can treat you better, better than she can." Finn moved to stand in front of Rachel but still up on the stage, he looked to be pleading her for something. I hadn't been able see Rachel's face throughout this whole performance which was annoying; however, I could feel Quinn tense up at any time when Finn glared up at me.

Finn: "Better than she can, better than she can." As Finn sang the last two lines of the song he punctured it by once again pointing back at me. With the music drifting away some people clapped and others didn't, I was one who didn't clap not liking what Finn had done. Glancing down at Rachel, who happened to look back at me at the right time? I watched as Rachel led her eyes and then faked yawn, making me smile and covering my mouth with my hand to stop any laughter from falling out. When my eyes contacted Finn, I knew then he had saw my interaction with Rachel and wasn't happy about it. However, he wasn't stupid to out Rachel then, even though he kind of did but didn't at the same time.

Mr Schue then said, "Maya and Mercedes you're up," Kurt clapped and screamed making Mercedes blush as she stood up and made her way up stage with Maya. Grabbing my phone out while the two deliberated, I decided to record their performance to send to Paige.

After Maya and Mercedes finished singing their song which was 'Bang, Bang by Jessie J, Ariana Grande and Nicki Minaj,' we clapped for them enjoying the upbeat performance. After them was Tina and Kurt who had decided to sing 'Ugly Hear by G.R. L' stating it wasn't about anyone, they both just really liked the song. Their voice had blended nicely together, which surprised me I didn't expected them to blend like it they had.

"Up next, Santana and Quinn," Mr Schue read out, to which Brittany and I screamed and clapped; making our girlfriends smile as the head up onto stage.

Quinn said with smirk "This one is for our girlfriends Emily and Brittany."

"We love you," Santana said as the soft melody music began to play.

Quinn: "It's amazing how you can speak right to my heart, without saying a word; you can light up the dark," Quinn start off singing and she sang directly towards me, I was completely mesmerised by her.

Santana: "Try as I may, I could never explain, what I head when you don't say a thing." I watched as Santana sang towards Brittany, with complete truth and honesty; it was very vulnerable of her.

Quinn and Santana: "The smile on your face, let's me know that you need me. There's a truth in your eyes, saying you'll never leave me." Never I feel myself mumble making Quinn smile when she sees it. I would never leave Quinn; it'd take an army for me to ever leave Quinn.

Santana: "The touch of your hand says you'll catch me whenever I fall, you says it best when you say nothing at all."

Quinn: "All day long I can hear people talking out loud, but when you hold me near, you drown out the crowd." When Quinn sung, I could see this whole new side to her, it was amazing to see her be this vulnerable not just for me but in front of others.

Santana: "Try as they may, they can never define what's been said between your heart and mine."

Quinn and Santana: "The smile on your face, let's me know that you need me. There's a truth in your eyes, saying you'll never leave me." Looking across at Brittany who glanced at me, we both shared a smile. We knew that this was very hard for our girlfriends but they continued and it felt amazing. We both turned back to looked at our respective girlfriends and continued watching this beautiful performance.

Quinn: "The touch of your hand says you'll catch me whenever I fall, you say it best when you say nothing at all."

Quinn and Santana: "The smile on your face, let's me know that you need me. There's a truth in your eyes, saying you'll never leave me. The touch of your hand says you'll catch me whenever I fall. The touch of your hand says you'll catch me whenever I fall, you say it best when you say nothing at all."

Santana: "You say it best when you say nothing at all; you say it best when you say nothing at all."

Quinn: "That smile on your face, the truth in your eyes, the touch of your hand, let's me know that you need me."

Santana: "You say it best when you say nothing at all; you say it best when you say nothing at all."

Quinn and Santana: "The smile on your face, the look in your eyes, the touch of your hand, let's me know that you need me." As Quinn and Santana proudly finished the song together, Brittany and I were the first ones on your feet and the only ones. After a few moments clapping, we both rush to the stage to give our girlfriends a big hug and kiss.

"I love you Quinn," I whisper into Quinn's ear making her smile and pull me closer to her.

Mr Schue then breaks the moment by saying "That concludes the first part of the competition, please make your way to your classes and we will meet back here during the last lesson of the day.

Quinn then whined "I don't want to go to class."

"Sooner you go to class, the sooner you'll see me again," I reasoned.

"Fine," Quinn said. Quinn gave me a quick peck on the lips and made her way to the exit, I smiled at her dramatics but it warmed me up. I soon found myself alone in the auditrom; I looked out at the crowd and wondered if this was where I was meant to be. Whether singing and dancing was my true dream, or was it still swimming.

"Emily," I heard Rachel say as she walked back into the auditrom.

"What's up?" I asked confused, Rachel never missed a class.

"We have to change our song; I need for Finn to know. I never meant to hurt him and that you and I are just friend; nothing more and nothing less."

"I don't know if I song can say all that Rachel."

"Yes it can, I've thought up a new song. We just need to rehearse it, are you up to missing class?"

"Okay Rachel," I say knowing she was determined to do this no matter what I said.

Walking into the cafeteria at lunch with Rachel, we had spent the whole morning rehearsing the new song which did say everything Rachel wanted to say to Finn. Looking around I found Quinn, Santana, Brittany and Maya all sitting at a table again. When I heard Rachel make a sound I look to where she was looking to see Finn was sitting at the glee club table.

I then suggest "Why don't you come sit with us today?"

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, come on," I say escorting her over to our table.

"Hey beautiful and everyone else," I say pecking the top of Quinn's head and sitting down next to her.

"Hi," Quinn said back.

Santana then asked me "Emily, why is Manhands sitting with us?"

"Santana!" I yelled at her and then proceed to glare at her.

"Alright calm down tiger," Maya said in a joking matter but I wasn't having it any of it, I continued glaring at Santana.

"Fine, I'm sorry. Why is Rachel sitting with us?"

I respond with "It's not me you have to apologise to."

Santana sighed and looked at Rachel before saying "I'm sorry for calling you that Rachel."

"It's fine," Rachel said with a shrug.

Santana looks at me expectant; I say, "Rachel's sitting with us because Finn's at the glee table."

Brittany asked, "What was up with that song he sung and changing the lyrics?" The table all looked at Rachel for answer, who definitely didn't want to explain.

I questioned "Do we all really want to analysis what goes through that boys mind?"

"Good point," Quinn said making the others nod and continue on with a different subject.

"Hey guys," I heard Mercedes ask as she walked over to our table.

"Hi," we all said at different times.

Mercedes continued with "Kurt and I were just discussing about having a glee girls sleepover at my house tonight, we were wondering if any of you would like to come?"

"Can we San, can we?" Brittany asked Santana. I laughed when Brittany brought out her pout knowing Santana didn't stand a chance against Brittany's pout.

Santana said "Shut it Emily, and yeah Britts and I'll be there."

Maya asked "Can I bring my laptop?"

I comment "That's an odd thing to ask."

Maya explained "Paige and I were meant to have a skype date tonight; they can all meet her through my laptop?"

Mercedes said "That'd be nice, to see what she looks and sounds like. We can even connect the laptop up to the flat screen TV."

"Awesome, I'm there. I'll just go ring Paige now to tell her."

"Say hi to McCullers for me," I yell as Maya walks away.

Mercedes asked, "What about you three?" she gestured to Quinn, Rachel and I.

I asked "Do you want to go?"

"Yeah, it sounds like fun but we don't have to go."

"We will be there Mercedes."

"Cool, what about you Rachel?" Turning to Rachel, I could see she was analysing it in her mind and trying to work out what to say.

Leaning across I whisper into her ear "If they try to ask you question that make you uncomfortable, I'll get them to stop. If you don't want them to know yet, they won't."

Rachel whispered into my ear "I don't care if they know; I just wanted Quinn to be the next one to know. After all it affects her a lot more than the others."

"She'll be there Mercedes," I say answering for Rachel.

"Awesome, I'll text you all the details," Mercedes said with a smile before leaving.

"Emily, why did you do that?" Rachel asked slapping my shoulder and I could see she was freaking out.

Standing up, I say "Quinn and Rachel, please follow me," Quinn looks at me weirdly and so does Rachel.

"I said please," I add on. The two then stand up and I lead them out of the cafeteria and out to Quinn's car.

Quinn asked, "Why are we out here?"

I explained "Rachel has something to tell you and I figured it was better out here, where no one can hear her." I watch as Quinn turns to look at Rachel, who looks scared.

"Emily, I don't think I can say it out loud," Rachel said looking at me.

I replied with "I know it's hard, believe me I do. Just take a deep breath and say it, Quinn isn't going to judge you."

Looking at Quinn, who take the hint and said, "Emily's right, I'm not going to judge you." Rachel glanced up at us to see the truth written upon our faces.

Rachel took a deep breath before saying "The, the reason why Finn and I broke up was because I was sick of lying to him and to myself. I didn't want to continue living a lie, so I was honest. I broke up with Finn because he isn't who I want to be with, he isn't my type. He isn't my type because I don't like boys, I never have. I'm gay," there they were those two big words. I was extremely proud of Rachel for saying those words out loud. Rachel then looked at me, she asked me a question through her eyes and that was for me to tell Quinn the rest.

"Finn thinks Rachel is only saying she's gay because I told her to, he doesn't think Rachel is actually gay. Finn thinks Rachel is in love with me and that I feel the same; however, he keeps forgetting that I'm in love with you. Rachel is in love with someone, he just doesn't realise that it's you Quinn."

Quinn then questioned "You mean to tell me, the girl I've liked since pre-school is gay and is in love with me."

Rachel asked "You like me? I thought you hated me."

"I've never hated you Rachel, I did all that to hide my feelings for you. Crap, Emily I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that."

Looking at Rachel, I asked "Are your Dads out of town again this weekend?"

"Yeah they are but why does that matter?"

I replied with "Because the three of us have a lot to discuss and it's going to be easier without other people around, so I'm going to go tell Mercedes that something has come up for the three of us."

"Wait, I don't understand."

"It's okay Quinn, you'll understand tonight," I say pecking her lips before leaving to go find Mercedes.

Walking back into the auditrom again but this time I wasn't with Quinn and I didn't sit next to her either, I sat on the wing, away from everyone. I needed to process everything in my head, make sure it made sense before I tried explaining it to Quinn and Rachel. I had told Mercedes that Quinn and I were going on a special date tonight, which I was trying to make a surprise and that Rachel's Dads needed her home tonight. Mercedes understood and said we'd have to have another sleepover when the three of us can come, I agreed completely.

Mr Schue spoke "Okay, thank-you for coming back. Up first we have Blaine and Brittany," we clapped as the two took to the stage. I don't really know what Blaine and Brittany, or Puck, Artie, Sam and Mike had sung, I was too busy in my head thinking about what was going to happen tonight.

Mr Schue said, "That just leaves Rachel and Emily," I look up when my name is called and realise it's my turn. Taking a deep breath, I stand up and make my way up to the stage. I sit down on a stool next to Rachel and get ready to start singing.

Emily: "I drew a broken heart, right on your window pane. Waited for your reply, here in the pouring rain. Just breathe against the glass, leave me some kind of sign. I know the hurt won't pass, yeah. Just tell me it's not the end of the line, just tell me it's not the end of the line." looking out at everyone I can see their shocked by the choice of song and wondering what we are going to do. After I finish singing I pick up my stool and move it to the wing; where I stand during Rachel's part.

Rachel: "I never meant to break your heart, now I won't let this plane go down. I never meant to make you cry, I'll do what it takes to make this fly, oh. You gotta hold on," from the wing I watch Rachel. I can see she's sings the first part of her solo to Finn but her focus is soon on Quinn. Once Rachel finishes singing like I she picks up her stool and walks to the opposite wing. Suddenly the music changes from it fast tempo to a very slow and very different beat.

I then walk out onto stage singing; Emily: "Heart beats fast, colours and promises. How to be brave? How can I love when I'm afraid to fall but watching you stand alone, all of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow." While singing I walked across the whole length of stage to reach Rachel and I finished with my hand out stretch to her.

Rachel bravely reaches out and takes my hand; Rachel: One step closer," we walk to the middle of the stage. I stand behind Rachel and we face the audience, I can see confusion which is good and bad.
Rachel: "I have died every day waiting for you," we sway at the same time and I can tell Rachel's eyes are trained on Quinn.

Emily: "Darling, don't be afraid," I sing this line to encourage Rachel.

Rachel: "I have loved you for a thousand years; I'll love you for a thousand more." Taking each of Rachel's hand in mine, we begin our little dance. Rachel takes a step to her left and I go right, letting go of her eft hand; we spread as far as we can without letting go.

The tempo picks up once again and we sing together; Rachel and Emily: "Hold on to what you're feeling, that feeling is the best thing. The best thing, alright," at this point we drop our hands at the same point and begin walking back up the stage; still facing the audience.

Emily: "I'm gonna place my beat on us, I know this love is heading in the same direction; that up," I wink out at Quinn when I sing. Even though we were about to go through this thing, we were going to face it together no matter what. Rachel went to sing when suddenly the music stopped, I looked at the band to see Finn had removed the cord from the amps and taken the drummers drumsticks.

"What's going on?" I asked confused.

Finn yells "This is a one song competition not do a mash-up."

I replied with "Then wait to the end of the performance to tell us."

Mr Schue walks up onto stage and said "Finn is right, it was only meant to be one song; it unfair to use two songs."

Rachel asked "So what we can't perform at all?"

Mr Schue explained "Either pick one of the two songs to sing, chose another song or don't sing at all." Taking Rachel's hand, I lead her off the stage and to the end, so we can talk privately without Finn intervening.

I asked "What do you want to do?"

"I don't know, I want to sing but I don't want to pick between those two songs."

"Okay, so we pick a new song?"

Rachel nods saying "I guess that's our only option but what song do we sing?"

"I can't think of a song that we could do which would be better than what we had planned."

"So we forfeit?"

"I don't want to but I think anything we do is just going to be a joke compared to what we had planned."

"Your right, this sucks."

"I'm with you. Hey what time should Quinn and I come over tonight?" I whisper the last part not wanting anyone to hear.

"Five-thirty, did you know she liked me before you know about me?"

"Yeah she kind of told me before we even started dating."

"So what is the deal with tonight?"

"The three of us just need to talk."

"Okay, we better get back out there."

"Yeah," I sigh and Rachel nods her head feeling the same way. Walking back out onto stage, we see Finn and Mr Schue still on the stage and everyone's just talking.

Finn asked "What's your decision?"

"If we can't do what we had planned then we aren't going to perform at all, which is your lose because it was amazing," I say knowing Rachel hate to admit defeat.

"Yeah right," I heard Finn mumble under his breath and if it wasn't for my phone ringing I would've ripped his head out.

"What?" I ask/yell as I answer my phone.

I then hear Spencer's voice say, "Wow calm down it's only me."

"Oh my god, Spence I am so sorry," at the mention of her name I see Quinn, Rachel, Santana, Brittany and Maya are now looking at me concerned.

"It's okay, Hanna said you've been trying to ring me. My phones been off."

"That's understandable; I just wanted to know how you are."

"I feel dead inside."

"Yeah, I feel the same."

"They said this isn't her first attempt, you've been here before with her, right?"

"Umm…yeah, this is her third attempt. It's not anything we do, it's what they do, her parents."

"I get that, it just."

"Hurts," I finish for Spencer. When I feel a hand on my shoulder I look up to see Quinn is now standing next to me, Brittany, Santana, Maya and Rachel are all surrounding me.

"Yeah, how'd you do it?"

"I kept telling myself that she was just sick that this wasn't her and one day she was going to beat this, I wanted to be there for that day."

Spencer then said "I wondered why you and Wren always had a good friendship, it confused me until now."

"Yep, I was the one who found her the first time. I drove her to the hospital, he was the first person I saw and I didn't want anyone else but him helping her. Then, the next time I called him and he helped me."

"And now he is doing it again."

"Yeah," I say letting out a sigh.

Mr Schue then interrupted our circle by saying "Sorry ladies, now isn't the time for this. We have other things to get to."

I heard Spencer whispered, "Dude about to get hurt."

Looking at Mr Schue I say "Well I'm sorry that one of my best friend's third suicide attempt is getting in the way of your busy schedule. Did she not plan it to your liking, when would you like her to do it again? When does it suit you?"

I then hear another voice which breaks the tears that had been threatening to fall "Spence, why can I hear Emily shouting?"

"Ali?" I question still in shock at hearing her voice.

"Em?" I hear a little ruffing telling me she's taken the phone from Spencer.

"You're okay, you can't keep doing this Ali because one day. One day you won't come back to us," I say sitting down unable to stand up anymore.

"I'm sorry Spencer, I'm sorry Emily," I can hear Ali beginning to cry and I cry with her.

"I love you Ali, I want you to get better, I need for you to get better."

"I'm going to try Em, I really am and I love you to."

"That's all I need to hear, now repeat that to your beautiful and scared girlfriend. I'll speak to you again soon," I say hanging up the phone.

Looking at the people circled around me, I say "She's okay, she's got a long way to recover but she'll do it."

"That's amazing Emily," Quinn said around a sob, I can now see the pain in Quinn's eyes. The others to actually, my friends had really become a part of their lives.

Pushing myself to my meet, I say "Okay, moving on from that. Mr Schue stage is all yours," I move off the stage and take my sit up the back again. Anything and everything Mr Schue said is just a blur because I was silently crying up the back, when Quinn stood up and sat down next to me I was surprised. When Quinn pulled me into her arms, I was shocked and just let the silent tears turn into loud tears.

"What now?" Quinn asked once it was just the two of us in the auditrom. Santana and Quinn had been announced as the winners, which was awesome but we didn't feel like celebrating but the other did.

"I think I need to run, I just need to get this out before Rachel's."

"I completely understand, so I'll meet you at Rachel's then?"

"Yeah that's probably for the best."

"Don't sweat it, I want you to be fully focused Emily."

"Okay, I'll see you later," I say leaning forward to peck Quinn's lips.

"Yeah," Quinn said with a smile. After giving her a quick smile back, I leave the auditrom and begin a slow jog to my house to change before going jogging around town.

A/N: Hey! So, the reason this is being posted on a Friday instead of Saturday is because I am busy all day and don't want to leave you wanting for another chapter. I hope you enjoyed said chapter and the story I am telling.

Song Reference List:

Treat You Better by Shawn Mendes

Bang, Bang by Jessie J, Ariana Grande and Nikki Manaj

Ugly Heart by G.R.L

When You Say Nothing At All by Ronan Keating

Up by Olly Murs

A Thousand Years by Christina Perri

See you guys next week! KJ99 :)