Outsider Observations
Chapter 3: Nerd Studies 101
"This really isn't necessary, you know," Spike sighed. "I can't bite you. How many times do I have to say it?"
"Yeah, yeah," Xander replied offhandedly as he wound the strong rope around the vampire. "You're impotent. I remember." The dark haired teen took particular delight in Spike's grimace. He tightened the knot, pulling with all his might. "You've been neutered, just like a family pet." Grinning, Xander turned back the covers of his bed and climbed in.
Spike retorted indignantly. "Hey, it's not like I can't perform sexually, you know. In fact, I can have my pick of women. Unlike you; you're bloody lucky Anya looks at you at all." He twisted in the red lounge chair trying to loosen the knots. "You've got Superman boxers on for pity's sake. Are you eighteen or six?"
"Sure, sure, pick of women; you're a real lady killer. Oh wait, you are, or used to be at least." Xander reached for the lamp and turned the switch. Moonlight fought valiantly to penetrate the grime of the basement windows. He stretched out on his back, hands behind his head and gazed up at the ceiling. "And, I'll have you know, that Superman boxers are perfectly acceptable for men. Why else would they make them in my size?"
"Men," Spike scoffed. He stared at Xander, his enhanced vision giving him a clear view. The boy was asleep within minutes, snoring up a storm. "Oh, that's just great," the vampire groaned. "What the bloody hell did I do to deserve this?" He shrugged. Some folks would say he deserved much, much worse, of course. Most folks would, in fact.
The vampire wriggled again, trying to get comfortable. He should be out prowling the darkened streets of Sunnydale, seeking an unsuspecting victim (usually some idiot wandering about a back alley, taking a shortcut that would cost him his life), drinking hot blood fresh from the vein. There was nothing better really than that first draught of the red stuff; it stained his mouth and swam sweet and warm down his throat, giving him life and vitality and vigor. The craving was intense but so was the pain from the chip in his head, the chip that prevented him from biting.
"Sodding soldiers," he whispered, not wanting to awaken Xander. Much as he enjoyed irritating the boy, Spike had to live with him too. "Messing with my head, making me weak and dependent and…" Anger surged through the demon. "Bloody bastards will pay." He didn't know how or when, but they would. With that somewhat soothing thought, he fell into a fitful sort of slumber.
Xander slammed his hand down on the cheap clock radio, stopping the strident alarm mid beep. He groaned and pulled the covers up over his head. He was not a morning person and had always hated waking up for school. Now it was a third rate job at a fast-food restaurant making breakfast sandwiches for people with good jobs.
"Rise and shine, loser boy," Spike called from his spot on the chair. "Don't want to be late for the office, now do you. Better get that suit and tie on." He chuckled to himself and watched as the young man struggled out of bed and then stumbled toward the bathroom.
"You know," Xander reminded Spike with a smirk. "I don't have to untie you and I don't have to get you any blood. Bet you're hungry now, aren't you?"
"Yeah, yeah, I get the point. Big, tough Xander is in control. That must be a first." Spike rolled his eyes and settled back in the chair to wait. "Go on then; get your bloody shower. Don't let me stop you."
The vampire wriggled his left arm and tried to reach the remote that sat on the table beside him. Some television would help to pass the time at least. That failing, he attempted to shift the chair over a few inches instead. The remote was just out of reach now and Spike groaned in frustration. He had no choice but to wait.
A shout came from upstairs and something crashed to the floor, shattering. There was a shriek then and the sound of the front door slamming shut. Spike shook his head. It wasn't the first time he had borne witness to the misery of Xander's parents. A subdued weeping came next as the boy's mother swept up the mess.
"Miss me?" Xander asked cheekily when he stepped back into the main room. He was in fresh boxers and vigorously towel dried his thick, dark hair. He pointedly ignored the sound of crying. For years now, he had been exposed to the violent cycle of drunkenness and abuse that his parents seemed unable to break free of. He had been the focus of that violence too. And he no longer felt any warmth or compassion for either mother or father. He simply endured.
"I never miss your inane chatter. Would you untie me now?" The vampire viciously jerked his arms upward and the rope bit into his flesh.
Xander grabbed the shirt of his uniform and slipped his arms into the sleeves before slowly freeing Spike. "You can microwave your blood now." He waved his hand toward the old refrigerator. "Just make sure you stay down here while I'm at work." Shiftily, Xander glanced up the wooden steps and let his eyes linger on the firmly shut basement door for a moment. "My mother doesn't do well with surprises."
'Poor sod,' the vampire thought with a flash of empathy. 'If that's the way it was around home all the time, no wonder he's an insecure mess.' He might feel a bit of sympathy but he wasn't about to let Xander in on the secret. "So, how did she react to you?" he quipped. Lithely, with that grace special to vampires, he leapt from the chair and over to the fridge. The animal blood was in a plastic container, shoved to the back where it would least be noticed. He filled his mug, Xander's chipped least favorite, and zapped it warm. Within seconds he had guzzled it down. It did the job. It kept him alive, but nothing could ever replace human blood. That was satisfying.
"Do you even realize that you've eaten?" Xander watched the process with a combination of disgust and wonder.
"Kind of like you with pizza then," Spike retorted quickly. He leaned casually against the fridge and crossed his arms. Well developed muscles bulged in and around his snug fitting black tee shirt. "Speaking of, maybe you could bring one back later. I enjoy a slice now and again."
"Fork over some cash; minimum wage doesn't go far, you know." The young man placed his hand out.
Almost desperately, Spike rooted around in his pockets and came up with a very crumpled looking ten dollar bill. "It's my last."
Xander snatched the money and shoved it into the pocket of his pants, pants that were still folded over the couch. "I'll be sure to treat it with dignity then. I have to go." He pulled his uniform pants on, ran a hand through slightly damp hair and then grabbed his wallet. "Don't do anything stupid. Anya's coming by to check on you later."
"Well that's something to look forward to, isn't it?" Spike leered suggestively and got the expected and desired result.
"If you hurt her," Xander's face was deadly serious, his voice like cold steel, "I'll stake you myself, buddy. Don't you forget that….ever."
The vampire was impressed. If nothing else, Xander was loyal to and protective of the ones that he loved. Underneath the silliness and the seeming uselessness beat a noble sort of heart. Even Spike could appreciate that. But, like the empathy he had felt earlier, Spike had no intention of making Xander aware. Mocking the kid was far too much fun.
"Whatever," Spike finally replied, waving the threat aside. "Off with you now; can't be late or you won't be able to climb that corporate ladder. If you behave really well, they might make you manager of the morning shift." His voice oozed sarcasm and derision.
Xander didn't have time to rise to the bait. He climbed the stairs, giving the vampire one final look. "Don't touch my stuff either. I'll know if you have."
Spike pouted with perfect lips. "What? I can't play with Han Solo? Whatever will I do?"
"Solo is sacred," Xander shot over his shoulder before pushing the door open, stepping into the upstairs kitchen and locking the door behind him.
The basement apartment was suddenly very, very quiet. Spike sighed, picked up the remote and made himself comfortable on the couch. The noise of the television would have to do until Anya showed up. He was getting used to human company. That couldn't be a good thing, could it?