CHAPTER 6
I tried to numb every part of my body as I hit the cement, rolling against the ground and coming to a stop. Of course this did nothing. And I felt every ounce of pain. Major road rash. I could feel blood leaking from me. It was warm and somehow, its feeling gave me a sense of false hope. False hope. I was sure I'd never really escape from the Joker. But I liked the way it felt anyways. I thought that, in only seconds, he'd stop the van, put it in reverse, and come back for me. But he did nothing. He slowed some what, but he continued to drive. Which was odd. I started running. Away from the van of course, because now I do think I heard the van screech to a stop. I wasn't sure, but I wasn't going to check either. I ran screaming my lungs out. I could hear thunder crackling over head, so I had assumed the city was pretty much dead. And I assumed right. It was like one of those terrible nightmares. Where you're running your fastest, but it doesn't seem to be enough. And you're screaming your loudest and no one hears you. Which was why I began to slow down a little. Then a lot. And soon I found myself wondering through this dead city. Had no one really heard me? Or was the Joker too intimidating that no one had the guts to come out. I knew if I switched places with these people, comfy in their own houses' warmth, and I heard screaming, I wouldn't need to think twice about helping someone else. Was this city too snobby to attend to my needs? Or was this city to frightened? Everyone was too afraid. Everyone. It seem unlikely that either of these options were possible for… everyone. There were heroes…right?
With my hope being false hope, I had only one other option. I don't know why I didn't call the police. Or why I didn't bang on someone's front door, begging for their help. Or why I didn't get a taxi, and ride far out of this city. Or why I didn't just keep running. But those options hadn't occurred to me right then. I thought, 'Well, this is it.' And instead of continuing, I sat down on the curb, and let the rain fall. Literally. It was sprinkling. I had no where to go. I couldn't go to college again. I'd never be able to have another room mate. I couldn't live by myself. I wouldn't have any where to go. I couldn't return home. Everyone would look at me like I was a freak. Everything has changed now. And I , for once, can't do a damn thing about it. I just sat there. On the curb. Listening to the sounds of this dead city. I could hear maybe a car miles away, speeding down some freeway. A slight moment of thunder every now and then. I could here crickets. And the rain drizzle down on the cement. I heard the wind whistling amongst the unlit windows of this forbidden street. Or so it seemed. No one was outside. It was so frightening. And then I did hear someone. Footsteps. They seemed real enough for me. But I didn't have to take a second look to know whose they belonged to. Because seconds after, I was flung from my little curb, my safe place, and thrown into the air. An iron grip wrapped around my arm. Why didn't I just keep running? Because I had no where to go. I don't think I've ever felt so alone before.
"That was a cute little stunt you pulled back there!" the Joker whispered in my ear. "But now my makeup's running!" He laughed and oddly enough I couldn't help but laugh too. I knew I shouldn't, but I did. And then there was silence. I looked up at the Joker, his black eyes staring down at me, like he was trying to burn a hole through me. Then I noticed all the other sounds. Like how the rain wasn't just a drizzle, but was throwing down buckets of water. The thunder was so fierce, I had heard nothing like it before. And I actually did hear people. People who were now screaming. I looked to my right to see a restaurant. A fancy one at that. Filled with dozens of people, and right there at the front table, was a phone. I burst into a fit of hysterical laughter. Which seemed to surprise the Joker. I was clenching my stomach, I was laughing so hard. All along help was right behind me, and I didn't even notice. How could I not have heard the people in there. Although they were frightened now, seeing us two through the glass, how could I not have heard that annoying clanking noise of dishes be passed. And the music! Instrumental and loud. I only laughed harder, as the Joker pulled me down the street.
"What's so funny!" The Joker screamed as we headed back to his van. He had a tight grip on my arm, but I didn't feel the pain. I didn't feel the blood flowing from my road rash either. I didn't feel a thing. Which made me craze with laughter. I was so utterly broken. "Did you…. see…. all those people!" I said between laughs. I heard him grunt and then we turned right. I had no idea where we were headed, and then I seen his van, parked in the middle of the road. "They just watched me…watched me run away… with you!" I was going crazy, maybe a little fresh air wasn't what I needed. The Joker dragged me to the van, and effortlessly through me into the passenger seat, slamming the door behind him. And then seconds later he was behind the wheel. Revving up the van's old engine. But before he put the car in drive he turned to look at me. His gaze more evil than ever. "Do something like this again, and we'll have to give old Ally a call." And just like that, it was over. This hysterical buzz was killed. By one little sentence. Ally's name was mentioned. My best friend's name. Ever since college though, we drifted apart. She was a housewife now. A stay-at-home mom. And was married to Gregory and had two daughters, Lindsey and Miranda. Five and seven. She had so much. So many people that needed her. Greg, Lindsey, Miranda. And not to mention the two cats, Smokey and Mittens. If she were gone, too many people would be hurt. Just like with Amanda and Sean. I knew from Amanda Sean was an only child, but it made it that much worst for his parents to know their only child is dead. Because of me. And Amanda was opposite. I think she had five brothers, a sister. Two step sisters. And one half-sister. All of them loved her with all their hearts. She was missed by some many people. So many hearts were broken. Because of me. If I were gone, I'm sure it would hurt my family too. But then no on else would get hurt.
He had me so brainwashed. Like all of this was actually 100 percent my fault. He was wrong, it was 50, 50.
"Leave Ally out of this," I begged for it more than I said it. And the Joker smiled; he was pleased. He put the van in drive and took off. I heard him lock the doors too. I had completely forgotten why we were driving into town in the first pace. Actually I'm not sure if he had told me. But now I knew where we were going. Back to his dull apartment. I guess he didn't trust me. The Joker actually believed I would pull another dumb stunt and put my sister's life in danger. But we were headed back anyways. How long were we gone? Was it possible the clock read 7:54, when we left here around 4:30? It felt like we were gone for minutes. Into town, I jumped for an escape, sat at a curb, and he took me. And then like I hit a brick wall, memories flooded back. And I hated, HATED, to remember them.
I was screaming. I was sitting at the curb, but I wasn't alone. I remember now the dozens of people who came up to me. Asking if I was okay and if I needed help. Hands grabbing my shoulders to see if I was still here. Which to them I probably wasn't. And then someone had their cell phone out, they were dialing some number. And I….
I didn't want to remember this part at all.
I snatched the phone from them and instead of calling the police, I actually chucked it across the road. All the while I heard distinct laughter in my head. I was going insane. I couldn't believe it. These people wanted to help me, and I denied them. Did I even scream after all. Or what? And then the worst memory of them came up. I knew it was the Joker walking toward me. I knew it. And yet, he was the only one I seemed to actually notice. This was entirely scary. Too much for me to comprehend. Why in the world was the Joker, the only person I happened to notice. Of all the good people trying to help me. Why was it Him who I noticed, who I felt touch me.
I could've puked. Actually I would've if it weren't for the fact that I knew I had to keep everything in my stomach to live. Hunger was one feeling I never felt while I was here. So I wasn't sure if I needed to eat. Actually, now I wasn't sure of anything. I wasn't sure where I was at first either. Until I heard the too familiar noise of the garage door opening. And I knew too well where I was. I was being dragged, well led, through the garage and of course to the same metallic doors the always led to someone's death. Except today, I was going back through them. And then I was so sure I would be half-dragged half-carried up the stairs. Except neither happened. I was just walking, slower than usual, up the three stories. All the while holding the Joker's hand. Which was something I wasn't too pleased about. I mean, I hated this guy and yet, I needed him just to make it up stairs. I was pathetic. He wasn't laughing for once, when I stumbled up a step, nearly landing on my face. Actually the odd part was, he actually stopped until I got back onto my feet. I didn't like the complete silence. It seemed more frightening then his hysteric laugh. The hall way was empty and dark. I would've never have guessed which door to go through. But we went into a room. Much different than the one
was use to. It wasn't an ugly dark black and grey. No, this room was white. Everything was white. A white bed with white pillows. And clear table with a white lamp next to the bed. A white dresser. White carpet. A white door leading to the bathroom, maybe. White curtains. It was almost blinding.
I didn't know what to expect, or what to do. Except something on another table, on the other side of the bed, caught my eye. It was another clear, floral vase filled with water. And in it was a red rose. It was surprising that it wasn't white. It was truly the only thing that made this room look semi-beautiful. If it wasn't for the fact that I knew this place belonged to the Joker. Which made me realize once again how oddly silent it was. I noticed the Joker hunched over a white desk, in the corner of the room. I heard slight murmurs from him as it seemed he was looking for something. I still had no idea of what I should do. I knew trying to run away was definitely out of the question. So I kind of sat down against the wall. Trying to make myself believe things would get better. I was fiddling with my clothes. Still the same ugly black hoodie and sweats. Which disgusted me more than anything. I felt so gross. And then the Joker stood up straight. I still heard talking. And no one but me was around. He turned around and eyed my on the floor. A smile growing from his lips. I hated that look. "You're staying here tonight!" He said. But without screaming it and without laughing. Then he abruptly left the room and shut the door behind him.
For once I was alone. Completely alone without another soul in the room. This is what I wanted and yet, I felt utterly strange inside. I didn't like this.
No one told me what to do. So I did it myself. I walked around the room, observing things. Like the dresser which was filled of lady's clothes. It was obvious this wasn't the Joker's room. But I never noticed a woman who live here. Or maybe I did. I just didn't remember. And because I felt nothing, I stole some clothes. Everything seemed a little too small so I ended up taking a pair of white jeans, which I knew were going to be very snug, and a white hoodie. Needless to say, everything was white. And I did end up finding some under clothes. I was determined to shower. No matter how bad things were, a shower always seemed to set my mind straight. And, because I wanted no interruptions, I took this chance to check outside my room. To make sure no one was coming. And no one was at all in the hall way. I heard no voices. Nothing. Silence. Which I started to enjoy. And then headed to the shower.
The shower was very pleasing at first. I felt clean and much better than before. It just worried me to see all the bruises hidden under my clothes. The ones against my ribs and thighs. The cuts down my arms, which I didn't remember getting. And the road rash burned. It was all along my forearms and my right shoulder. It had stopped bleeding, but the warmth of the water felt like I was torching my skin. And my face stung from the soap too. My face was so tender. I hated how weak I felt. I got out of the shower as soon as possible. Which was weird. I expected to feel better. But noticing all my cuts and bruises, and the scars-to-be, made me feel worse. And I dressed quickly. Feeling pain with every brush of fabric to skin contact. The mirror made me worse. My eyes were completely lifeless. And I was still bruised, although not as swollen. The 'Emma' was just about gone, although traces of the 'E' were still visible. The room was steamy and so I hurried out into the white room. I know I had just slept for so long, but another nap seemed great. Except to my surprise I wasn't alone. No. The Joker sat upon the huge white bed. I noticed he wasn't wearing his jacket. Just his purple snake skin sweater and his green waist coat. I tried not to make a sound. Like maybe being quiet would turn me invisible. But it hadn't.
"And so she awakens." he said, in a dark voice. I wasn't sure who he was referring to. I kept quiet. And then he turned to face me. It took me by surprise to see a lot of his make up missing. It was streaked, and I knew then he had been in the rain. "Care to sleep Emma? I could do for a nap myself." He laughed at my horrified expression. I didn't move, didn't speak. I just shook my head slowly. "Aw come one, I don't bite hard!" Now his voice was raised and his smile grew. "You know you want to!" And he was laughing. I turned away. I didn't want to face him. To see him. But I heard him get up. And walk over to me. His arms wrapped tightly around me and he whispered," You and I could be really fun." I cried, noticing the knife in his hands. Noticing the way he held me. I hated every bit of it. But I didn't fight him off either. I just stood there. Because I thought if I didn't move, I just might go invisible.