CHAPTER 16

Another lonesome night. The air was chilly, and it was quite windy. I sat, tortured by my mother's face, in the Joker's car. We never went back afterwards. He kicked his henchmen out and we drove away. Out of town and to another somewhat deserted area on the outskirts of Gotham. I've been sitting here in this seat for hours. Literally. The Joker roamed the outside of the car. Pacing back and forth. Why should this incident even be a big deal to him? It should be a big deal to me! I'm the daughter, he's the psychopathic serial killer. And finally he just sat on the top of his van.

Weird I know. That's what he was though. Very strange.

I heard him climbing and the whole van shook. And now its just been very quiet. A ringing in my ear was driving me nuts. I wasn't sure how long he intended to keep us here. Along a deserted road next to an open field on one side and miles of trees on the other. But I had no chance of surviving this horrid boredom. And so I opened the car door, quietly, and climbed out. It felt great to stretch. My legs practically numb from sitting there for what seemed like forever. The sound of the wind and birds in the trees was oddly loud. A huge transfer from my completely silent spot in the Joker's van. I didn't bother to shut the door. It just hung open.

First I looked up at the stars. It was amazing how many there were visible tonight. Usually back at home or at 'his' place, the stars were there, but the city sort of blocked them. But this was… Wow. Beautiful. Mind-boggling. That sort of thing. And then I walked to the back of the van. Where a small metal ladder led to the top of his van. I sighed. I hate being alone. Even if it means I have to sit next to a very strange clown. Who's own perdition involves a knife and a smile. I climbed quietly, but the metal bars were wet with dew. And I almost slipped twice. Finally though, I was aggravated at my clumsiness and just lunged myself to the top. Where I pulled my self up, a sharp end of the ladder snatching and ripping the bottom of my purple sweat pants. Ugh.

So there I was. Hands and knees on the top of his van and he sat, scrunched up. His back to me. I sighed again. And turned my back on him. Sitting the same way, my knees tucked under my chin. And at first it was quiet. Which had gotten very annoying to begin with. Which was the whole reason I came out here in the bone chilling air in the first place. And I looked at the stars again. The top of his van was slightly wet as well, but I didn't really care. I laid back. Finally on my back, to look at the full view of the stars. And that's when the Joker finally turned around.

"And they call me strange," he commented. Joining me and laying next to me. Being this close, like this, at this time was a little dizzy-making. And suddenly the cold air felt good against my hot face. And then I could feel the Joker staring at me. I turned my head in his direction as well, and stared back at him. And you think the dark would make him look less human. Which was actually the opposite. Well for me at least. His usually coal black eyes glittered with flecks of brown in the dim light. And for some reason, the scars just showed more. I hate awkward silences. And before I could, the Joker sat up straight. And before I knew it, had disappeared off the side of the van. Which was also very strange. But then I heard the van's engine start up and I began to panic. Hurrying over to the ladder as fast and as careful as I could. Until I heard music which made me wince. A high-pitched woman's voice filled the air among solemn playing music. Violins, piano, and bells could be heard. Ugh. And then I heard the Joker laughing.

And before I was even half way down, I felt two hands on my hips, tugging me backwards and planting me on the ground. He spun me around, grabbing both my wrists, and pulled me into. "Tell me love, have you ever danced with the devil in pale moonlight?" the Joker asked. He released one of my wrists, and his hand slid around to the small of my back. While his other hand, his left hand, held my right hand. He towered over me. Which made me realize that he must be at least 4 or 5 inches taller than me. I stared straight at his green waist coat. Actually nervous to look in his eyes. We sort of danced there, only my dancing skills are very poor and I mostly just stood there.

"Tell me doll face. What's your favorite color?" he asked. And the randomness of this brought me back some. "What?" I said, looking up to him now, finally meeting eye to eye. A smile spread across his face. "What's your favorite color?" I stared at him for a moment. "Blue," I said. He closed his eyes, as if thinking. And then I felt pressure on the small of my back. And I was pushed into him even more. "So, Emma," he began, breaking our moment's silence, "Do you think I'm a monster?" His eyes finally flickered open again to meet mine. And I remained quiet. How should I answer this question. Really? He was a monster. He killed with no regret. With no remorse. He hurt me. A lot. Even if it was awhile ago. But then again, he never really was a monster to me. Actually these past few weeks….weren't that bad.

"You were to me," I said coldly. And the Joker smiled at me. "I was?" he questioned. "I…" I tried to speak but I couldn't. I didn't no what to say as the Joker was too exotic. I sighed. "I'm getting tired," I said, releasing my hand from his and pulling away from him. "No, Emma. Not this time," he said, pulling me back. "No, this time you have to say it." I paused and immediately knew what he wanted. I shook my head. And he looked at me, now frowning. I narrowed my eyes. His false face won't fool me tonight. I will not say it. "Why so serious?" I asked him. A smile pulling at my own lips as I realized I used his own line against him. But his face was dead. And slowly my smile began to fade. His hand grabbed my chin.

"You are truly beautiful when you smile," he said, pulling my face loser to his and placing his lips against my forehead. I just stood there, with his chin resting on the top of my head. Then in a fast movement, my legs were off the ground. I gasped out, startled. He was holding me. "Shall we go home, sweetheart? So that this moment never has to end?" He asked without really asking. Carrying me back into my seat, all the while I was blushing like a school girl.

I stretched, cold and stiff, in my room, or so you could call it that. White everything. Except the red roses and the bright blue jewelry box with no contents. I bought that. Just to add some color to this room. Crap. I was decorating? I suddenly shook. It was quite cold in here. I rubbed my arms. I wasn't quite tired. And knew it would be hours before I actually fell asleep. It was too cold outside. Besides, I wasn't sure I wanted to be out there alone, in the dark. All though I'm not sure I could run into anything worse than what I'm in now. Too many things happened and I can't believe in the same day. It's been a long day. My mom was here. In Gotham. I have no idea why she is here, but she is. Maybe to look for me? Maybe because she's gone insane? I'm not positive. But she's here, in this town.

And then there was Toby. Who I am now certain knows my real name. And how? I'm not sure either. I hate these questions. Where the answers aren't even close to me. I sat down, frustrated. My bed was nice and soft. Clean, too. I shut my eyes. Maybe I could fall asleep.

Creeaaak. Of course here, that would be impossible. My eyes shot opened and stared at the white ceiling. Which was awfully bright and my eyes watered. I licked my chapped lips. Damn autumn wind. Damn white ceiling. Damn it all! Everything is just so confusing. I yawned. A good one at that. Which felt relieving. And now time to face him. I sat up on my elbows. "Ahh, my sleeping beauty awakens," mocked the Joker, "And without true love's kiss?" I scrunched my face, "I never was the fairy-tale type." The Joker laughed, "I couldn't imagine." Ugh. He was in my room, leaning against the door. Like always. Coming in to 'chat,' like he does. I sighed. "I'm really tired." And I wasn't, but I was really tired of his manipulative bull crap. So I was hoping he got the double meaning.

"Long day?" he asked, smiling. Thoughts of my mother's horrified face came to me. I turned my face away from his. "Oh don't pout doll face, it's really not your best angle." I shot him a dirty look and he laughed. "There's the fire in those eyes I was looking for," he said in such a voice I knew I should be afraid, but I couldn't manage to feel that way. He stood, his red lips smiling back at me. Dark, dark, dark, brown eyes boring into my own. That devilish look about his posture. And all I could do was smile back. "I'm Emma," I said. And the Joker's face turned confused. He was about to say something, but I beat him there, "What's your name?" I asked. His smile returned, "Jack Napier."

I narrowed my eyes at him. Was he telling the truth? No, no, he couldn't be. I laid back down on my back. "I hate liars," I said. "As do I," said the Joker in a sharp tone. I sighed. He lies about everything. That is that. "Emma," he said. And it was the only way my name sounded right. Coming from his voice, in that tone. When anyone else said… Emma….. It sounded so awkward. I could almost see his patience burning low. "What," I said sharply. "Listen to me carefully." And the tone of his voice made me think it was something important. "I," he said, stalling.

"I love you, Emma," he said, and the hint of humor in his voice was obvious. I shot straight up. "SHUT UP!" I screamed. I hated when those words were used falsely. Those words are not meant to come from his mouth. Although the room did get quiet. "At least, now I do," he said, a little more serious. I stared coldly back at him but he wouldn't stare at me. "You know Emma, when I found out you were coming here… I wanted to kill you." Ooohh what a surprise. I bet he still does. "I wanted to see you struggle, and suffer in my hands for leaving me." He stopped for a moment. "As if I ever meant to leave you as a child! I did have two parents who weren't fond of psycho children!" I replied.

The Joker laughed and then began pacing the room. "I didn't care then Emma. I wanted you dead. But every time I got the chance…" He kept pacing. Don't tell me now is when he loses his train of thought. "What," I said. "I don't know myself, Emma. I just couldn't. And now. I love you!" He said it like it was obvious. Which it wasn't. Then he stopped pacing and walked over to me. "I hated you Emma," he began, looking me straight in the eye, "More than you ever hated me-" I was about to speak but his finger went to his lips, "Don't interrupt. I hated you more than you ever hated me, and now I absolutely adore you. Your hair." And he picked up a strand of my hair, rubbing it between his two, gloved fingers. He looked at his hands, and slowly pulled his gloves off. I noticed his hand placed on my bed, between my legs, and how much he has leaned in to me, forcing me back onto my elbows.

"Your eyes," he said, looking at me. "Your lips" His eyes glanced at my lips and then shut. "Your beautiful smile." He opened his eyes again. "Your voice. Your laugh. Your skin." He placed his warm hand against my neck. "See, Emma. I'm madly in love," he said. And although I was tired of all the lies and the games, I couldn't help but think, maybe this time, he was telling the truth. My hand reached out and grabbed his shoulder, pushing him away some so I could sit up more. I hadn't noticed the tears in my eyes, which I regretted, until I saw the Joker looking at them. The Joker smiled, "Tears of joy, my love?" He asked. I smiled, letting out a small laugh. Then I shook my head, "No, no, no. No this can't be happening. This is another one of your games. And I don't want to be apart of it!"

The Joker shook his head, "No Emma, I'm done playing games with you. It's just shoving away what's real. You're not my toy anymore. Your beautiful and you're mine." I looked away from his eyes. "If you loved me so much you would've let me stay home." I didn't want to look at his expression. It could be the end of me.
"Would you have stayed Emma? Or would you have come back?" I now met his eyes. They were trying to pry the truth from me. I shook my head. "Why would you ask that?" "Because Emma. I know you love me. I know you do. Which is why I'm that much crazier for you," and with that he laughed to himself, "Tell me truthfully, would you have stayed Emma? Or would you have come back to me?" I paused. There was no easy way out of this. I open my mouth, I had to say something. But…. Defeat. I shut my mouth and stared away from him. "Exactly," he said.

"I didn't say anything!" I shouted back. My eyes were pouring with tears. By now the Joker was standing and pacing my room again. "You didn't have to," he said. "My life would be so much better without you! That's the truth. I'm sure if I went home and knew I could honestly live a life without you, I would. A happy, and fulfilled life at that. I don't need you Joker. All I need is my own life back again. Without you."

I startled myself with how much I said. How much I just lied about. If I went home, I would come back. I am madly in love with the Joker, even if it defies all of humanity, I am. And now I was expecting something. To be shouted at. Hit, cut. Something. But no, not this. No. The Joker paced to the other end of the room. He opened a white drawer at his white desk and pulled out something metallic. Then he marched back to me, dropping the item in front of me. "Go home then, Emma."

I was startled to say the least. I looked up at the Joker's crazy eyes, confused. "I'm tired of you Emma. It was inevitable. One day you were going to bore me to death so just leave. And take what's her face with you!" He brushed his jacket sleeves up his arms and then turned away from me, stomping out the door way and slamming the door shut. He couldn't be serious. I looked at the keys sitting in front of me. Leave? Just like that? Was he serious! Did I bore him? Was he really, truly finished with me? I bit my lip, feeling the wave of emotions flowing through me. Fine. I can call his bluff.

I pounced off the bed. Tired and hungry, but everything went away. I hurriedly grabbed a black jacket from inside the giant white dresser. And then snatched the keys and left the room. I ran down the stairs. Until I reached the second floor and I hurriedly jogged down to Charity's room. Any minute now the Joker will be right there. To snatch the keys back and laugh in my face. He couldn't have said everything with such a straight face and not have meant it. Of course, the Joker is a compulsive liar. Just like me. I stood in front of Charity's door. With out knocking, I swung it open. Charity eyed me, startled at first and then relieved. Little Mikey laid his head in her lap, sleeping.

"What's-" she began, but I didn't let her finish. "We're leaving here!" I said. She looked at me. "What?" Her tone was slightly annoyed. "Leaving. Here. Now." I said, quickly. Pacing through her room to grab her things, like her clothes and Mikey's toys. "Are you serious?" she asked, gently moving Mikey so she could stand. "Serious," I repeated. Then she joined my frantic rush and began packing her things. "Is he going to kill us?" she asked. Her voice sounded really shaky. I stopped, and stood up, looking at her. She was rushing to throw her and Mikey's things inside a black garbage bag. "No, he told me to leave, for us to leave, " I said. And she stopped too, giving me a weird look. "To leave? Just like that?" she asked. I nodded my head. "What's the catch?" I looked over at her doorway. The other side of the hallway revealed a door I recognize as the "planning room." Where their get-togethers would be. And I couldn't help but hear shouting, although faint, and what sounded like things breaking.

"Well?" asked Charity. I flinched, "No catch, just leave," I said quietly. She shook her head but continued to pack.

And then we were outside. In front of Charity's little white car. She threw the bags in the trunk and then took Mikey's sleeping form from me. She went in the back seat and sat with Mikey, who barely flickered an eye open at all the commotion. And then I jumped in the driver's seat.

I thought about finding my mom, but I have no idea where to start. And as soon as the car started, I saw the there was hardly any movement in the gas gage. It just barely sat there above E. I sighed. "Sorry," said Charity, her voice shivering from the cold as she slipped her sweater off, draping it over Mikey's shivering body. "Well at least we can get away from here," I said. Which is what we did. No sooner did I put the car in drive though, did the 'low fuel,' light spring on.

"So where are we going?" she asked. "No where special," I said, not caring if this confused her or not. But I knew where I was going. Or at least for now. To Bella's. Although I had no money, they at least had a small parking lot, where we could easily hide out for now and sleep until morning. And by the time I had pulled into Bella's lot, Charity was already half asleep. "Where…" Was all she managed. And then I turned the car off. That was a good question to ask…. Where?