"Because I know, Merlin. I know who and what you are."
Merlin jerked back away from Arthur, shock gripping his system. Holding the prince at arms length, the warlock's mind goes into overdrive.
Arthur couldn't know - he must be referring to something other than Merlin's magic. Yes. Yes, that was it, Arthur must mean he knows about Merlin's habit of not washing between his toes, or that he sometimes hides food under his neckerchief during long council meetings, or something else embarassing like that. There was no way the prince could know his manservant was a warlock.
It was impossible! No guards were being called, Arthur wasn't looking at him in disgust or anger, and the arms still held around him were definitely there to hold him together, not to keep him prisoner.
Arthur had just mentioned how he wasn't going to let anyone hurt Merlin.
This was too much. Merlin wasn't going to get his hopes up for nothing. His panicked eyes reach Arthur's, searching, and suddenly he understands - those patient, reassuring blue eyes were never going to hurt him. Arthur knew, knew about Merlin's magic, and he honestly didn't want him dead.
This was more than he ever could have dreamed for.
"You.. you know?" Merlin's voice is barely above a whisper, hoarse with remaining fear. Frowning at Meriln's skittishness, Arthur rubs his hands up and down Merln's arms comfortingly in an effort to calm him down. When he's seen that Merlin isn't going to have a nervous breakdown, he allows himself a small smile.
"I know. Of course I know. I'll admit, I'm a little disappointed you didn't tell me yourself. But I couldn't take it any longer, not with the plans we need to make now -"
"What plans? Wait, Arthur, how can you know? When did you know, for how long? Why -"
"Shh..." Arthur resumes rubbing Merlin's arms, bringing him back to his chest in another embrace. "With you saving my life every other day, how could I not notice?" he murmurs, his voice low. "As for why I didn't mention it earlier, I was rather hoping you would. You know you can trust me with anything, don't you?"
Speechless, Merlin only nods into the other man's chest.
A feeling of gratefulness, warmth and sheer happiness spreads through his veins and chases out the fear. The warlock grins and turns his head up so he can see Arthur's face. Leaning forward, he rushes to bring their lips together. Caught a little off guard, the prince is still quick to react, responding enthusiastically and tightening his arms around the other man.
All too quickly Merlin pulls away, but keeps close so their forheads are touching. He keeps grinning as he whispers,
"You brilliant, beautiful, wonderfully stupid prat. Of course you know."
Pulling his arms in tighter, the sudden relief of the whole situation hits him - Merlin's knees give out and suddenly the arms around him are the only thing keeping him upright.
The prince stumbles back towards the table and sits Merlin down, the warlock smiling weakly up at him.
"Sorry," he mutters, "It's a lot to take in..."
Arthur nods in understanding, giving the man a moment to relax before bringing up what questions had been bothering him since he had found out. He takes his own calming breath before beginning.
"When did you start studying sorcery?"
The warlock glances up, calmed down enough to answer, and does so quite plainly -
"I didn't."
Clearly not the answer he was expecting, Arthur raises his eyebrow in confusion, encouraging Merlin to continue. He smiles slightly, hopefully, in return.
"I'm not a sorcerer, I'm a warlock - there's a difference."
"The difference being...?"
"Sorcerers take years of study and training, not to mention the talent you need to accomplish anything other than the most basic of spells.
Warlocks, like me, are born with magic - it's as natural a part of them as breathing. Mind you, most aren't quite the same as me - I'm supposed to be a bit more powerful than any others, something to do with druid legends and destiny and stuff, but I won't go too far into that right now..."
It's Arthur's turn to be properly stunned. He'd never had any doubt that Merlin meant no harm towards him or Camelot, but to find out that his manservant was more powerful than any others - it filled him with guilt and regret. Before he knew the secret, before they had become friends, Arthur had treated Merlin like a useless tool, a bumbling servant, and Merlin had taken it all - played his part perfectly.
How lonely it must have been, to be so powerful and never receive any credit or thanks; to be so kind, loyal, and have to pretend to be a fool. It had never even been Merlin's choice to have magic in the first place, Arthur had never thought to imagine that that was possible -
"Oh, God."
Merlin sits up in a hurry, Arthur's sudden change in attitude alarming. "Arthur? Arthur, what's wrong?"
The blank face of the prince meets the warlock's worry, the blue eyes slowing growing more panicked every second. Arthur speaks slowly, deliberately, as though still trying to understand what he was saying,
"All the people I've brought to their deaths - the children - some of them never did anything, they were just born that way?"
Relief swept through the warlock - for an instant, he had been worried he'd said the wrong thing, something to shake Arthur from his resolve, something that would result in his death - before overwhelming guilt took it's place. Arthur was clearly in pain, that needed to be his priority right now, not his own relief. That could be saved for later.
"Arthur, it's not your fault, there's nothing you could have done. Your father wouldn't have listened, it's not your fault," Merlin whispers soothingly, grabbing the prince's steady shoulders and bringing his face close. He takes Arthur's hand and brings it to his own face, holding it there. "But you can change it soon. You can fix this, Arthur, I know you can. Be the king Camelot needs. That I need."
The prince nods absently, still overcome with the weight of what he and his father's rule have done. Merlin smiles, trying to bring Arthur out of this grief.
"But everything is perfect now, right? No more secrets."
Arthur's eyes meet his, still filled with saddness, but with a small spark.
"No more secrets. At least, not between us. I don't think it's a good idea for anyone else to find out about your magic quite yet - "
The prince gets cut off abruptly as a sharp clang echoes from outside the bedroom's door. Both men break apart and Merlin rushes forward to see whats happened.
Suddenly, Gwen is there, out of breath and panicked, looking at each of her friends in turn. Her eyes stop on Merlin, begging him to forgive her -
"I heard everything. I don't care about any of it, Merlin, I really don't - I think it's great in fact. Absolutely! And it's really not a surprise, not when you think about it-"
"Guenivere!" Arthur barks, cutting in sharply. Gwen goes silent, her eyes darting between them. "What is the matter, we heard a loud noise..?"
The coffee-skinned girl's eyes return to lock with those of the warlock, the fear in them evident. But not for herself.
"I wasn't the only one who heard. I was surprised as you by the sound - there was a maid listening behind me. She dropped the tray when she ran - I fear she's gone to tell Uther everything! Merlin, you need to get out, run, now!"
Merlin felt his stomach drop and his blood turn cold - his worst fears were happening. He stood, frozen, two pairs of eyes locked on him. He sensed the sudden flurry of movement around him, but nothing registered. He's too busy coming to terms with the idea of abandoning everything - Camelot, his home, his friends, Gaius, Arthur -
The sharp intake of breath pierces Merlin like a knife.
He has to say goodbye to Arthur.
Things could be worse, the warlock reasons, I could never have known Arthur as I do. He could have found out so much earlier and everything would be different - I wouldn't get to say goodbye at all. I wouldn't have wanted to.
Time slows as strong hands grab his own and a low, hurried voice speaks to him quickly, "Merlin, we need to go. Now. Gwen can lead them off, but it won't take the guards long to find us." He huffs once at the lack of response. "I can't exactly carry you, can I, so let's get going." Merlin's head snaps to meet the blonde's gaze.
"We?"
The warlock's mind is still moving slowly as the prince grabs his hand begins pulling him out the door and down the hallway, a quickly packed bag in his other hand. The information clicks just as they're nearing the back dungeon exit.
"Arthur, you can't come with me - you're the crown prince! Your life is worth a thousand of mine, if they even knew you were helping me escape, your father would -"
Desparate lips are pressed against his, silencing whatever argument Merlin would have made. The kiss is brief, but passionate. There's no doubt Arthur will not be swayed.
"I'm not leaving you." He growls, pulling away so they can keep moving. Merlin pulls back, jerking them to a stop.
Arthur turns back again, clearly about to give Merlin a piece of his mind. But the warlock speaks first, his voice barely audible over the faint echoes of the warning bells in the distance.
Just a question.
"Are you sure?"
In answer, the prince rushes back and pulls the servant into his arms for a deeper, longer kiss. In that moment, there is nothing but them. Just Arthur and Merlin, together. They stay that way until the footsteps of approaching guards can no longer be ignored, at which point they clasp hands and run.
At the last moment, as the pair have just reached the outer town's edge, does Merlin stop them once more. He pauses, then bends down and takes a small amount of soil, depositing it into his mother's locket which he always wore, day and night. He returns the locket around his neck and tucks it under his neckerchief, where it rests just beside his heart.
It was the only reminder of home he allowed himself. Then, the two rejoined hands and ran.
They didn't look back.
Looking at it now, this seems a perfectly logical place to end it..
but that's not what I had planned. And I'm one of those kind of people who likes plans. Soo, this'll probably go on quite a while longer.
Again, sorry if it's jumping around too much or anything! Still getting used to this! :)
and I still own nothing. Unfortunately. Merlin is all BBC.