Long lost & gone
Chapter 12
"Come on Elena, it's time to get up." Caroline was pulling on the sheets, doing her best not to use too much of her vampire strength but Elena held onto them stubbornly.
With a sigh she gave up and placed herself on the edge of the bed next to her friend "Lena, this has to stop, it's been over a year, he's gone, they're both gone."
"I want them back." her face came out from under the covers and Caroline saw the dark circles under her red eyes, her face pale and skinnier than ever, she was killing herself.
The vampire lifted the covers up so she could sneak under them, she spooned her friend from behind and held her gently, afraid she might break if her grip was to tight "I know you want them back but it can't go on like this, you've been in bed for a year, you have to get out. This isn't fair to Jenna, she wants to see you. She hasn't seen you in months." Jenna had been on bed rest for four months but a week ago her niece was finally born. Elena had refused to visit her, she had refused to leave her bed. She only got out when she had a meeting with her Therapist, Stefan had forced her into grief counseling after Jeremy's death, pushing her because he couldn't stand it anymore, he couldn't stand seeing her crawl in a corner to cry, he couldn't watch her fall apart in front of him anymore, it hurted him to see her collaps to the floor where she would curl up and hug herself till the pain went away but it never went away, it only faded for a moment before it would lit back up again, the moments it faded she would run to get into their bedroom and lock herself up for the rest of the day. After a while she didn't see the point of coming out of the bed anymore, she knew after a few minutes she would end up back in it anyway.
"I know it's not fair but it hurts so much, it won't stop, it won't go away." Caroline could hear the tears in her voice.
"I know sweetie but you have to be strong, just start with today. Jenna wants you at the party, I'll be there for you, I'll be next to you the entire time." she rubbed her friends arm and felt her shiver in her embrace, she didn't liked to be touched.
"I want to be there but I can't, It won't go away, I can't make it stop."the trembling was getting worse and Caroline pulled the covers over her shoulder, knowing it wouldn't work but she had to do something, anything, anything to make her friend feel better. "I can make it go away." she whispered, not believing she just said that, but she would do it if it made her friend feel better, she would do anything to get her out of this bed and see her smile again. Elena turned around in the vampire's embrace, facing her "What do you mean?" she was whispering too.
"I mean, I can make you forget, I can make you forget he ever excisted, that you ever met him. I can take away the pain Elena. We all know this isn't about Jeremy, maybe at first but you've mourned your brother. It's him you will never stop mourning."
"But my memories keep me going, without them I won't be alive anymore." she shook her head, letting Caroline know this wasn't an option.
"But if you don't have those anymore the pain will be gone too, I can compel you to thinking that you once met Stefan's brother, he was a jerk, you didn't like him, when he left you were happy about it." Caroline knew that Elena wasn't going to accept this but she had to try, she wanted her friend back.
"I don't want to think about him that way, I love him, I love him more than anything. You can't take him away from me Caroline, don't take him away from me." she was having a panick attack, she was having them a lot lately, her whole body felt uneasy with Damon gone even more than the first time he left, because it knew he was still out there, he was still there to comfort her and to hold her, to make the trembling stop, to make the pain stop, to make a half, whole again.
"Shh... Elena." Caroline rubbed her arm under the covers, trying to soothe her.
"You can't take him from me, I promised I would find him."her breathing was getting heavy and uneven, there was a river of tears flowing out of her eyes.
"Shh...Sweetie, Nobody is going to take him from you." Caroline pulled her friend closer, taking the risk breaking her.
Elena snuggled deeper into her curls, hiding her face in them, her body started to relax against Caroline's and her voice became soft, exhausted "I promised."
"Maybe you should look for him, you can't go on like this, it I'll kill you." she pulled her head back so the face of her friend wasn't covered with her curls anymore.
Elena started to shake her head fiercely " No.. I can't, Bonnie is still looking. If I vanish she will look for me, you know how she reacted when I couldn't describe the vampire that killed Jeremy, she suspected something, she suspects me, I don't care about that but if she finds me, she will find Damon too." she could tell Caroline this, she was the only one that knew the truth about Jeremy's death, she had told her a long time ago because she needed someone to talk to, someone she could trust with it, someone that wouldn't judge her, judge him, judge them.
"I know, it's just that the postcards are coming more frequently, he misses you Elena, he's waiting for you." The postcards started showing up a week after Jeremy's funeral, they were send to Caroline's house with Elena's name on them, they didn't say anything they only had a photograph with a location on them, New York, Los Angeles, Madrid, Rome, Berlin, Paris, Georgia... After the first one it had taken a month before the second one arrived, the third one came three weeks later and the ones that followed usually sooner. Caroline would tell her about them but never gave them to her, she saved them in a box at her house so they wouldn't be discovered by Stefan or worse... Bonnie.
"What did it say?" she didn't like knowing where he was because every time Caroline told her a location she would take her laptop from the bedside table and start looking for every possible way to get to him, she would check flights, bus rides, car routes, bike rides. She would even consider walking five thousand miles if it would get her to him but she knew she had to stay here, she knew that neither of them were an option, she only asked because she had noticed a pattern in them lately.
"Vancouver."
She nodded her head, understanding that it fit in the pattern she had noticed"He's coming closer to home."
"You're afraid he's going to invade the wedding?" Stefan had cancelled the wedding, knowing they couldn't marry when her brother had died so he had moved it a year forwards, giving her more time to curse herself.
"I wouldn't mind that but it would get him killed."her voice sounded more steady now and her breating had become easier.
"Elena, if you don't want to marry Stefan we can find a way out, we can come up with something, it wouldn't be easy but there are other ways to protect him." Caroline's gaze was locked with hers and she was staring right into her core.
"No, I'll do this. I'll be Ms. Stefan Salvatore, he'll turn me and when Bonnie finally stops looking I'll find Damon, I'll have an eternity to look for him, to be with him." a small smile crept across her lips, liking the last part of her sentence.
"You don't have to turn, that aren't the right reasons to turn. Stefan assumes you'll be with him forever, that you want his blood flowing through you veins for eternity." Caroline didn't look away from her, she was reading her face, reading her whole body.
But she looked away from Caroline "You know I'm jealous of you because of that?"her voice was a whisper and she was afraid to look up again.
"Of what?" her voice sounded confused.
"His blood it's running through your veins, it turned you into a vampire, you'll have a piece of him forever. When Stefan turns me it won't mean anything to me." she held her gaze away from Caroline, ashamed of what she'd just confessed.
Caroline was quiet for a moment, thinking about what she was going to propose "If you want me to, I'll turn you after the wedding, his blood is in mine, it won't be much but I can make his blood flow into you too."
She finally looked up, seeing the sincere expression on her friends face "You would do that?"
Caroline nodded "Yes I would, I will. But this whole depression thing has to stop, you're going to get up, take a shower, dress and you're going to pay a visit to your new niece and aunt and you're going to stop whining about your miserable life and do something about it."
And with those words, with that promise, she got up and ran into the bathroom.
She had her fist in the air prepared to knock the door but before she had the chance to, the door was pulled open, it reminded her of the times Damon did that.
"Elena, you're here, I'm so glad you came !" she could see her aunt through the door, walking her way with her arms wide open, she cast a glance at the man that had pulled the door open, she didn't know him but the look on his face seemed familiar.
Jenna reached her and gave her a hug that had her gasping for air "Jenna, if you want me to stay, you better not kill me." she gave her aunt a smile when she pulled back.
Caroline was standing next to her and received the same welcome, she was a vampire so she didn't need air, Jenna could have a go with her.
She stared at the man at the door, he reminded her of someone "Oh, this is Cooper. Alaric's cousin, he's the bad boy." Jenna smiled at him and took their hands to pull them into the house.
"Every family should have a bad boy, just like every family has a geek, you married ours." his smile was bright and his brown eyes lit up, closing the door behind them.
"Well, this is my niece Elena and her friend Caroline, stay away from them." Caroline chuckled at Jenna's attempt to sound convincing and Elena managed to get a small smile on her face.
"So where is my niece ?" Elena was curious about the new Saltzman, she already knew that Jenna would ask her to babysit a lot, Jenna was still a partygirl and she dragged Ric with her every chance she got.
Jenna smiled at her, pleased "She's upstair asleep but you can go see her, she has Ric genes, not even a bomb besides her bed could wake her up."
"You go, I'll stay here, call me if you need me." Caroline squeezed her arm, reassuring her and walked towards Tyler.
"You're so beautiful." she was stroking the babies cheek, wishing she could hold her but not wanting to take the risk of waking her up.
Miranda Elena Saltzman was a beauty, Jenna had asked her before she was put on bed rest if it was okay to name the baby after her mother. She had assured her that it was fine, that she was honord, that her mother would be. She didn't tell her that she wouldn't use the name herself because she wouldn't ever have children.
The baby grabbed her finger in her tiny wrist, holding it "I wish I could give you a niece or nephew to play with. You would like that, wouldn't you?" she stroked Miranda's cheek with her other hand and stared at the tiny fist that was holding her finger "I mean, if they would take after their daddy, they would be rough around the edges, probably a bit mean too." she pictured her children in her head, blue eyes, black raven hair, smiles to die for. "But they would make the best friends you ever had. You should know your uncle, I wish you could meet him, I think he would like you. I know he likes your daddy, they were drinking buddies, it took them a long time to get there but they found their common intrest in scotch and bourbon." she chuckled at the thought of the vampire and the vampire slayer being friends, she had always found it weird.
The baby started stirring and released Elena's finger from her grip. Not wanting to wake her up completely she left her old room that was now transformed in a pink baby room with white furniture.
Crossing the corridor she saw the door to her brothers room, it was on a crack and she couldn't resist herself from taking a peek inside. She opened the door further and was met with a pair of chocolate brown eyes, red from crying and wiping.
"Hi Bonnie." she kept her voice firm.
"Hi, I just... I wanted to see his room, I have so many memories in here." she looked around and smiled.
"It's okay, I was doing the same." she managed to get a tiny smile on her face.
The brown eyes were filled with tears again "Does it ever get easier? It's been a year and I still feel like it was yesterday."
She knew what she was talking about, the pain, the hole in your chest, the inability to feel happy, to love someone else again "Everyone says it gets easier but I don't believe them, I still feel all of it." she shook her head, laughing inside at the people that had told her that, it only got worse.
"I can't imagine how it must be to go through that two times, first your parents then Jeremy but I know how it feels now, the pain that comes with losing your family" Bonnie wiped her nose and hold on to her chest.
She lifted her head up and spoke in a steady voice "No, it's the pain that comes with losing the one you love the most in the whole universe, the pain that comes with losing your future." she shrugged "By the way it's three times."
Bonnie looked up at her "How do you mean? It wasn't the same for you with John and Lucy, you didn't care that much about them."
"No but I cared about Damon." she locked her eyes with Bonnie's so she could see the fury in them.
Bonnie looked away from her face to let her eyes rest in her lap "That doesn't count, he isn't death."
She felt the fire in her burn "No you just told me he was." she spit it at her, still angry for making that choice, still angry for taking that choice away from her.
Bonnie got up and turned on her defensive mode, she could see it in her body language "You really think he cared for you? That he loved you? He just wanted Katherine back that's why he let you stay with Stefan so you acted just like her."
"He didn't want Katherine back !" she was shouting and she hoped the music downstairs was loud enough to keep this conversation private.
"How can you be so sure about that?" Bonnie pulled her eyebrow up, doubting her certainty.
"Because I know."
"I'm sorry you had to see that." his back was turned towards her, looking into the closet in front of him.
"What? You and your boyfriend making out on the couch?" he shrugged "It's nothing I haven't seen before."
"It's just that things have changed between us, I don't want you to think the wrong things." she kept her place against the doorframe, leaning against it.
"And what would those things be?" he didn't turn around, he kept inspecting his closet, grabbing a few of his t-shirts and sweaters.
"Just... " she sighed defeated "I don't know."
He took a pair of jeans from the hanger and threw them on the bed "Well maybe you should find out."
She saw him pulling out a travelbag from underneath the bed, finally realising what he was doing "You're leaving?" her voice pitched.
"Yeah, don't worry it's just for a few days. I'll be back soon enough to interrupt your make out sessions with loverboy." he put the clothes in the bag and made his way to the bathroom.
She became frustrated, frustrated with his behaviour, frustrated because he was leaving, frustrated because she would have to miss him "What do you want from me?" she was yelling, she knew it, she didn't care.
She was pinned against the wall in less than a second, staring into wide blue eyes, feeling his chest pressed against her breast, her hips between his, his hands pressed against the wall next to her head, his warm breath on her face and her arms already holding onto his back.
Her breathing was heavy and she felt him shift slightly so there was more space between their bodies but she could still feel him everywhere "I know one thing, I don't want a second Katherine. I've been there, done that, didn't like it very much." his eyes were boring into hers and she stared right back, not afraid, not afraid to speak her mind.
"I am not Katherine." she bit her teeth together and pushed her nails in his back, angry at him for saying that.
"Well you're sure acting like her." his jaw tensed and his hips pressed himself harder into hers, she knew he was trying to push her buttons, he was daring her, daring her to play this game with him.
"Ah." she put her finger to her chin, pretending to think "That's why you like me so much!"
His eyes became even wider, she knew he hated it when she said that he only wanted her because of her resemblance to Katherine, she also knew it wasn't true.
He pushed himself off the wall with a growl, zipping his bag up and throwing it over his shoulder while she stood frozen against the wall taking heavy breaths and missing his body against hers.
He passed her on his way to the door, before he could reach it she grabbed his arm "Don't leave." her voice was a whisper and she could see his eyes soften.
"It's council business, it's only for four days. I'll be back before you know it." he came closer and placed a kiss on her forehead.
She shook her head, four days were too long, even four second were too long but she didn't want to sound desperate so she made her voice sound teasing "What am I going to do without you for four days?" she held onto his jacket, not wanting to let him go.
He put his bag down and his face was serious, he lifted his hand to stroke her cheek and locked his eyes with her "There's something you need to do for me."
She felt a lump in her throat, having a bad feeling about this but she nodded her head, preparing herself.
"I need you to choose." she could see that he was serious, that he had enough of not being sure if she wanted him, if she needed him as much as she claimed.
She shook her head " It's not that simple."
He nodded "I know, I just want you to choose, I give you four days, we'll figure it out when I get back."
She just nodded and he pulled his hand away from her cheek, reaching for his bag on the floor.
He tried to step through the door but was pulled back, she was still holding his jacket. He looked at her and gave her a smile, a smile she returned before releasing him, him and his jacket. He grabbed the back of her neck with his free hand and pressed his lips against hers before leaving her alone with her thoughts.
"You just don't get it. He didn't love you, he didn't even care for you. He used you to get back at Stefan and you let him." Bonnie was pointing her finger at her, treating her like a criminal.
"And even if that's true you still didn't have the right to take him from me." she was screaming, they both were, that music downstairs wouldn't cover it anymore.
"It was my job to protect you, I did my job, you were my best friend, you still are." she crossed her arms, probably because she knew if she pointed that finger one more time in Elena's direction she would lose it.
"You weren't my friend, my friend wouldn't have made me feel like this, my friend would have talked to me, my friend would have let me make my own decision. You are not my friend Bonnie." she bored her eyes into the chocolat brow ones, considering her next words very carefully "You are my worst enemy." letting them slide over her tongue, very slowly so they wouldn't miss their purpose.
And they didn't, she could see Bonnie's eyes soften, she started tearing up again "Why are you still here if you want to be with him so badly?"
She couldn't tell her why but she could make her feel even worse, she knew that this wasn't her, that she didn't hurt people but the witch had hurted her so much, so much without even realising it, she was the one still hurting her because even without realising it she was the reason that she had to stay here, to keep the witch here "Because my so called best friend doesn't want to track him with her special skills." she shrugged and turned around to leave.
"I'm sorry." the voice was a whisper but she still heard it.
She turned around in the doorway "But you're not going to do anything about it, are you?" she crossed her arms, still not wanting to forgive her, still not wanting to be the nice girl.
"No, I'm sorry I won't track him." she looked up with her judgy little eyes, letting her know that she wouldn't change her mind.
"I hope witches go to hell."
She pulled her jacket on, shielding herself against the cool air.
"Look who couldn't stay away." the voice came from the swing on the porch.
She recognised the man but couldn't remember his name "Hi, I'm sorry I just wanted some fresh air."
"It's okay, there's enough room on this swing for both of us." he patted the seat next to him and she sat down.
"So if you're Alaric's cousin than why didn't I see you at the wedding?" she looked at him and saw something shift in his eyes.
"Well, I could avoid this anwser but I'm really not in the mood.." he lifted his shoulders and took a deep breath, composing himself "my wife died the day before the wedding, Alaric and I, we've always been close but I just couldn't ruin his wedding with me moping around." he tried to smile but failed.
Elena touched his arm and did her best not to cry "I'm so sorry for asking."
He patted her hand "It's okay, you didn't know."
She wanted to make him feel better but didn't know how to so she decided to stay with fact "You don't look sad, You look..."
"Dashing, gorgeous, irresistible?" he smirked at her and lifted his eyebrows suggestively
And there it was, the person he reminded her of, the person she had seen in him when she walked in, the expression she recognised because she had seen someone wearing it before.
Damon.
She laughed, not able to hold it back and for once she didn't feel the pain that came with thinking of him. She felt the joy from thinking of him.
He laughed with her "What's so funny?" he looked at her with that expression that made her think of a moment in Georgia, the moment where she was doing shots and daring him to order more of them.
She took a deep breath, trying to stop herself from laughing "Now I know why you and Alaric are so close." she couldn't stop laughing, she didn't know why, it wasn't that funny, but it felt so good.
He was still laughing with her, laughing because her giggles were like those of a twelve year old "Oh yeah? Why is that ?"
She sat up and leaned against the back of the swing "It's just, this friend of mine, you remind me so much of him, he used to spend a lot of time with Alaric too."
He sat up to "So if he's Alaric's friend than why isn't he here?" he was still laughing.
She stopped laughing, feeling the ache in her chest again "Because he died, a few years back." Alaric still thought he was death so she should probably tell his cousin the same.
He touched her arm like she had done before, she noticed she didn't flinch for the first time in months, she didn't mind him touching her, maybe because he resembled Damon so much. But at the same time he wasn't Damon, his eyes were brown not blue, his hair was also brown not the black raven hair she was used to, his face was soft and his mouth was thin, he looked in his early thirties not in his late twenties.
"I'm sorry." she patted his hand.
"It's okay, you didn't know." she used the same words as him on purpose, not wanting to give away to much of herself but she could feel her heart squeezing together again.
He looked at her and saw something in her eyes "He broke your heart." it wasn't a question, it was a statement.
Confusion started taking over her and she pulled her hand back"What?"
"I saw it when you walked in the door, I see it now in your eyes when you talk about him. He's the one that broke your heart." he sounded sure of himself and ofcourse he was right but how did he know?
"I'm sorry C..." she couldn't remember his name.
He seemed to notice "Cooper, just call me Coop."
"Well Coop, I will tell you something, I'm engaged to a wonderful man and I'm going to be married in a month, there is no other man for me than him, my heart is perfectly intact." she sounded very convincing even if she didn't believe a word she said herself.
He placed his hand on her arm again, locking their eyes "Yes you're engaged and maybe you even love him but I can see in your eyes you would do anything to get the other one back, the one I remind you of."
She was in defensive mode now, trying to be as cruel as he was "Wouldn't you? To get your wife back?"
She saw him flinch "I deserved that one."
She crossed her arms, pulling away from his touch again and nodded "Yes you did, what makes you think that you can just tell me stuff like that?"
He looked up at her again "Because I had an affair once, I know the signs."
She nodded, moving her arm, gesturing for him to go on.
"I felt so guilty, I told my wife."
She wanted to know more "What did she say?"
His gaze locked on hers once again "She told me to choose."
She nodded her head, understanding him "Someone told me to choose once."
He nodded, knowing he had been right from the start but not calling her out on her bluff, he looked sincere "Who did you choose?"
She was standing in front of a door, soaking wet, her hair was dripping on her back and she felt like there was a whole ocean of water in her shoes but she just kept knocking on the door, waiting for it to open.
"I choose you."
As soon as he opened the door the words came out of her mouth.
He stood there staring at her, his mouth open but nothing came out, maybe he hadn't heard her "I choose you." she would keep repeating it till he said something.
"Elena, it's storming." he shook his head in disbelieve, she didn't care, she needed to tell him this.
"Yes I've noticed." she gestured her hands up and down over her body.
He smiled at her and it made her heart skip a beat, it was now that she noticed his appearance, his hair was wet and he only wore a towel around his waist, he shook his head at her"Why are you here?"
She stepped forwards so her body was pressed against his and cupped his face in her hands "Because I don't need four days to realise that I want you."
They were staring at each other before he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her closer "Than what took you so long?" his eyebrow frowned, teasing her.
She sighed and her face became irritated "Caroline couldn't find the address her mom left, it took her two hours to realise that she had written it down in her notebook."she waved her hands in the air.
He chuckled and pulled her head against his bare chest to kiss her crown"Next time, I'll leave you the address so you don't have to threaten the sherrif's daughter."
Pulling back and fixing her gaze with his again, she pointed her finger at him and pushed it repeatedly against his chest "No mister, next time you take me with you." she didn't gave him the time to argue and pushed herself up to press her lips against his.
He kissed her back, bruising her mouth, he pushed the door shut with his feet and they stumbled to the bed, him removing her wet clothes from her body and she placing kissed on every inch of his body.
"Tell me your mine." he stopped kissing her neck to look at her.
Looking into the ocean blue eyes she knew that this was what she wanted, that this was her choice, that this was the choice she would spend the rest of her life with, this was the choice she would never regret, this was the choice she had made before he had even asked her to make it a few hours ago.
She pulled her head back and locked her gaze with his, nodding "I am."
He shook his head, not pleased"Say it."his eyes boring into hers, trying to see that she was his, that he could put his claim on her.
Grabbing his hair and pulling his lips to hers, she placed a soft kiss on them before whispering against them.
"You own me."
"I chose you." she smiled at him, knowing he would understand.
He laughed "I am the better choice you know."
She nodded her head "I know."
They were interrupted by the front door, revealing Stefan, he looked like he was looking for something, his eyes stopped looking when he saw her "Here you are, I've been looking everywhere."
She gestured to Cooper "Stefan I want you to meet Alaric's cousin Cooper, he's quiet the charmer." she couldn't help herself from smiling.
Stefan looked at her face and smiled too before turning his gaze to Cooper "Hi, I'm Stefan. Elena's fiance." Cooper shook his hand.
"I've heard great things about you." Stefan just looked confused at him before turning his attention back to Elena.
"It's getting late." she could see a smile on his face that she hadn't seen in a long time.
She nodded her head again "Yes, we should go. I'm just going to say goodbye to everyone." she turned back "It was nice meeting you, Cooper."
He grabbed her hand and placed a kiss on the back "It was nice meeting you, Elena."
Her mind was already registering the moment for the second time, first with Damon after the first time she met him, now with Cooper..after the first time she met him.
In the house she told everyone goodbye, saving Caroline for last.
The vampire hugged her and put her mouth to her hear "Are you okay, I heard the fight with Bonnie upstairs."
"Yes I'm fine, I actually feel better about it." she looked at the floor ashamed.
Caroline tapped her shoulder "You look better too, I'm proud of you, she deserved it." Elena smiled a little, knowing she wasn't the only one thinking that.
"Can you do something for me?" she whispered in the vampire's ear.
"Sure, what can I do?" she pushed her ear against Elena's mouth.
"Just make sure Cooper gets my number, don't ask any question. Just make sure he gets it." she pulled her head away from Caroline and saw her nod, pressing her lips together.
"Thank you." she sighed and hugged her tightly before turning around and making her way toward Stefan.
She snuggled under the covers in her silk pj's, feeling at ease for the first time in the last year.
"You seem happy." she turned her head around to see Stefan next to her in the bed, his eyes fixed on her.
"I'm fine." she turned her head around again, facing the wall.
Soft kisses were being placed on her bare shoulder and she felt an arm wrap around her.
"Forget it, Stefan." she grabbed the arm and threw it off her body.
He growled "Elena, it's been a year since I last touched you. A year to a vampire may seem nothing but I'm human too, I have needs."
She sat up in the bed and looked at him "Well that's what your left hand is for Stefan."
She grabbed her pillow and got up earning a strange look from him "Where are you going?"
Waving at him while leaving the room she shouted over her shoulder "Damon's room."
Snuggling under the covers again she was embraced by his scent, it was strange how is presence was still notable while he hadn't been here anymore in more than a year, even with all his clothes gone and the comforters he had slept on, his smell was still here.
She had missed this room, missed this smell, missed this feeling. She couldn't help herself when she looked at the pillow next to her, patting the empty space, it was this feeling inside of her that everything was going to be okay. That maybe soon, but still not soon enough, that place would be filled, black raven hair would be pressed in the pillow, a face more beautiful than any human could ever wish for would rest on it. Maybe soon, she would wake up to the ocean blue eyes staring at her, maybe soon she would finally feel like herself again.