D/C: copyright Hussie
Be still my beating heart!
Your name is JANE CROCKER and YOU THINK YOUR HEART is going to just JUMP OUT OF YOUR CHEST.
Jake looks absolutely dashing, as always, even in those silly shorts. The way he yields his guns make him look brave, like a hero in one of those movies he likes so much.
His face lights up when he sees you, and oh, god, your heart is going insane.
You want to tell him the truth. Instead you ask him how his thing with Dirk is going. Only a good friend like you would be so thoughtful as to ask!
Are you stupid? (We've already come to that conclusion, though. The answer is yes, yes you are.)
He's laughing, clapping your back in a friendly manner.
Your heart hurts.
He mentions something about Dirk. He can't wait until they can all meet each other, face to face, and there's a blush on his cheeks when mentioning Dirk.
Your heart hurts.
You thought he was merely open to the idea.
Of course he would have been harbouring feelings for your friend.
It's not fair.
Oh, did you say that out loud? The look he's giving you is quizzical. "Whatever are you talking about, old girl?"
"Nothing at all! Everything's just fine, dear friend."
You laugh, and ohgod, it sounds so unnatural, and now he looks uneasy, but he smiles regardless, nervousness behind it.
"If you insist, Jane. You know, you've mentioned our solid friendship so many times in just the past few minutes, I'm starting to think it was poppycock that I ever thought otherwise!"
Your name is Jane Crocker and you wonder if it's possible to be blinded by emotional pain because ouch, you can't seem to see anything right now because it just /hurts/, it hurts so bad, and he doesn't even fucking know, doesn't fucking realize-
You're laughing again, and you are acutely aware of how harsh and false and /wrong/ it sounds. "Yes, Jake! Absolute poppycock! What on Earth were you thinking? That I could possibly...?" You can't finish it, it's too close to a confession that it's far too late for.
He looks rather worried now, but you don't care.
"We should continue, dear friend, or we wont get to meet up with the others!"
{ouchouchouchouchouchouchouch}
That weird pain in your chest is feeling darker and deeper.