Caitlin took a deep breath as she took the doorknob in her hand. She opened the door and wandered in pretending to be reading a document.
"Stop"!
She lifted her head up and looked at Andrew puzzled than at the hostages.
"Oh God, I'm sorry. I didn't know you were in a role-playing exercise. I'm a bit early. Please proceed. I'll wait outside".
The SWAT leader sneered. "What the hell is she doing"?
Alvin turned around and gave him a dirty look. "She's downplaying the seriousness of the situation to make him feel more relaxed and at the same time still feel in control. It's an undercover classic".
"Yeah, whatever".
Alvin stood. "She's one of the best undercover cops you'll find in Chicago, so don't you dare underestimate her". Hank stood and held Alvin back.
"Just let it go Al".
"I'm sorry, I can't let you do that", said Andrew, as he perpetually shifted the gun from her to the group of hostages. "Sit down"!
She cocked her head to the side. "Andrew, what are you doing"?
"You wouldn't understand. I just want them to suffer"!
"Has one of them hurt you in any way"?
"No"!
"Then who hurt you? I mean if you want to make them suffer, it's got to be because someone hurt you".
"You won't understand".
"Well, I'm here. You might as well give it a shot. Try me".
Seeing he wouldn't talk, Caitlin switched plans. "Is it because of Rebecca"?
Hank nodded. "That's it Cat, get him talking".
Andrew looked at Caitlin surprised. "How do you know about Rebecca"?
"What, you think I don't have access or read my recruit's files"?
"You're bluffing", yelled out Andrew.
"Rebecca Stein, 20 years old. Art major at the University of Chicago. Died a year ago, victim of a drive-by shooting near Lincoln Park late one night as she was heading home from class. You were engaged to be married. You had set the date and let me guess, it was supposed to be tomorrow. You still think I'm bluffing"?
Adam looked at Hank and Alvin. "How does she do that"?
Hank looked at him. "It's a Voight thing".
"That doesn't change anything. You still can't understand".
"Understand what? The pain you feel? The anger? That you're entire world has fallen apart? Oh trust me Andrew, I know how that feels".
"Oh yeah"?
"Yeah. I do. You think you're the only one who's lost someone they love to this cruel world we live in"?
"So, who'd you lose Instructor"?
"My husband. He was abducted by a gang. They kept him for months and beat him to death".
Andrew paced the floor. "I don't believe you"!
"Look it up on the net. Instructor Barnes has his mobile phone".
Andrew walked over to Barnes and took his phone.
"Search Detective Antonio Dawson".
Andrew typed in the words in the search engine and very quickly results popped up. He clicked on an article about his death and read it. He also saw a picture of Caitlin and Antonio together on their wedding day.
"It hurts doesn't it? It hurts bad. Like you can't breathe. You feel alone because no one understands how you feel".
He nodded.
"And that's why we want to hurt others, so that others will know what it's like to suffer like we do".
He thrust his gun towards the group of hostage. "I can't be the one to suffer alone anymore".
Caitlin stood and walked slowly over to him. She placed herself between the gun and the hostages.
Alvin stood. What the hell was she doing? "Get her out of there Hank"!
"Wait", said Hank. "Give her a minute".
"She'll be dead in a minute! Get her the fuck out of there"!
"I can't get her out of there and you know it. You're going to have to trust her"!
"Andrew, you don't have to do this. If you do this, you're not any better than those who shot Rebecca".
"I just want it to stop hurting"! he yelled out
"I know, but if you hurt someone today, it won't make the pain go away".
"It's too late. I'm sure that the SWAT is already here".
"It's not too late Andrew. You can still change the way this is going to turn out".
He looked at her. "How was it? For you when you lost him"?
Caitlin closed her eyes for a second. "Terrible. I was angry and sad. I was mad at everyone. I went off the deep end. I left Chicago without telling anyone. I did some really bad things".
"What kind of things"?
She motioned to the group behind her to leave.
Andrew turned his attention to the group that was slowly heading for the door.
"Andrew? Look at me. You don't need them. Just keep your focus on me. I did a lot of stupid things. I drank a lot, tried drugs, slept around with a different guy every chance I had. I even tried to kill myself".
Hank looked at Alvin. Caitlin was so good at her job, it was hard to know what was true and what wasn't.
"I loved him with all my heart. I would have taken his place in a heartbeat. I would have sacrificed my life, if it meant that he would live. I vowed myself never to love anyone again".
"I wish she were still here", said Andrew with tears in his eyes.
"Yeah, I know. Not a day goes by where I didn't wish that I could see him again. I'd give anything for that to happen. But you and I know it's not possible".
The SWAT retrieved the last of the hostages from outside of the classroom. "Hostages are clear", she heard in the earpiece.
She put her hand out to him. "Andrew, give me the gun. Let's walk out of here together and let me help you".
He took a couple steps back and came in view of the window.
"I've got a visual on the suspect", said the SWAT shooter in his microphone.
"Take him down", said the SWAT leader.
Hank jumped in. "The hostages are safe. He is not a threat anymore. Tell your guy to stand down".
Caitlin hear faintly what was going on in the tent through the earpiece. She took a few steps closer to Andrew, putting herself in front of the window as well.
"Caitlin, I don't know what you're doing, but you've got to act fast", said Jay.
Andrew put the gun to his head. "This is the only solution".
"Don't do it Andrew. Rebecca wouldn't want you to end things this way. Why do you think I came back to Chicago? That I became an Instructor at the Academy? Because, it does get better and easier with time. Think of Rebecca. I didn't know her but I know that Antonio would never have wanted me to miss out on life because of what happened to him. I owe him that much than to move on, because I am alive and I know that's what he would want".
"Move on? How am I supposed to move on"?
"A step at a time, a day at a time. I can't tell you how long it will take but you will get there. Things will never be the same, they'll be different and you know what, different is OK, it's good and that's how you'll keep her memory alive, by doing what she will never be able to do".
"Have you moved on"?
Caitlin smiled. "Yes, I have. I've returned to Chicago and to the CPD. I've met an amazing man, who loves me and respects me, who I'm sure that right now is worried sick about me and would take my place in no time, and who I can't imagine spending the rest of my life without".
Hank looked at Alvin and smiled.
"My life is ruined. I'll never be a cop now".
"Don't say that. You've hurt no one. All you need to do is walk out of here with me and get some help. When you're better and you are ready to take those first steps, you'll come back and graduate from the Academy and you'll be able to keep criminals, like those who took Rebecca away from you, off the streets".
"Let's walk out of here together".
She turned around and headed for the door. "Whatever you do, don't shoot"! she whispered firmly in the microphone.
"Suspect is alone, waiting for your order to take him down", said the SWAT shooter. Jay looked at him. "She told you not to shoot"!
"I don't take orders from her"!
"Hold your fire", she said again firmly in the mic.
Hank looked at the SWAT leader. "Tell you're guy to hold fire".
"If he steps away from that window, it's over, we won't have another shot".
"That kid is hanging on to the only bit of hope that my niece is giving him right now. I need you to trust her. She knows what she's doing"!
"Hold fire", said the SWAT leader to his shooter.
She turned and put her hand out. "Just give me the gun and let's walk out of here".
He looked at her pain stricken. "I know it doesn't seem like it now, but I promise you, you will get through this. Just give me the gun".
Andrew slowly moved his armed hand towards hers. Her eyes grew wide as she realized that the safety was off.
"That's it, nice and slow". He placed the gun in her hand and she put the safety lock back on. She put it behind her back inside her jeans. She put her hand on Andrew and walked out of the classroom. The SWAT watched from the hallway as she took him towards the main entrance.
When they reached outside, Hank, Alvin and the rest of the team were waiting for them, along with other cops. Two cops took Andrew and handcuffed him. He looked at her.
"Thank you".
"You take care of yourself", she answered.
They took him away to the first available police car as she joined the team.
"You can be proud of yourself. We get to finish the day with no casualties".
Jay came running up to them.
"Thanks Jay for having my back up there".
"And all of you in here".
Alvin took her into his arms. "Never. Never do that again"!
"Promise". She looked into his eyes.
"What is it"?
"I lied to him. You and I both know he'll never be a cop, not with his history and not with this".
"I know it's hard, but you lied to him for his own good. I'm sure someday, he'll understand and be grateful that you did".
As they put all the stuff away, a man in a suit walked into the tent.
"Where's my son"?!
Hank walked up to him with a stern look on his face. "Senator Cox, I presume".
"Where's my son"?!
"He's over at Med for psychiatric evaluation".
"You have no right! I'll make sure your career is over".
Caitlin jumped in before Hank could say anything.
"And you had no right pulling strings to get your son into the Academy with the psychological and psychiatric issues he was having. You not only put your son at risk, but the entire Academy. I don't know whose ass you kissed to get him in, but I swear to you, that if you even as much try to touch the careers any of us here today, I will make it my only job to find out who it was and ruin your career"!
"And who the hell are you"? he asked.
"Voight. You want me to spell it for you? By the way, just so we're clear. I'm the only reason your son is still alive"!
He looked at her.
"Now do your son a favor and get him the help and attention he needs, instead of threatening us".
Cox said nothing but turned heels and headed out of the tent.
As Alvin and Caitlin laid down in bed, Alvin placed his head over her belly. "Your mom kicked ass today"! He lifted his head and placed his hand on her belly.
Caitlin smiled as she watched him. "Al, of all the things I said in there…"
He cut her off. "Yeah, I know you told me not to believe a single word of it".
"Well, that's the thing. When I said that I had met an amazing man who I couldn't imagine spending the rest of my life without… I was telling the truth"!
He smiled at her. "Are you proposing? Cause if you are it sucks".
"No. I'm not proposing. But I guess what I'm saying is that when you're ready, I'll be ready".