AN: Thank-you thank-you thank-you. I am blown away with the support for my little story, highly appreciate EVERY SINGLE review, favourite, follows and the PMs.

This is the final chapter to this story. Maybe next year I will write a second installment but for now it is complete. For readers/followers of my other story Misplaced & Found, I will start to re-upload the edited re-worked story in the new year. Thanks again.

Now I wish you all a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

BETA: Halo140 and pusher Stargazer93

CHAPTER NINE

STARING, MY PALMS SHOOK as I studied, the three major lines of head, heart, and life were a cross-haired mess. Yeah, reality bared in my hands, that's for sure. Turning them over my nails flicker in the small slither of daylight. At the time of my nail appointment, the snowflakes design seemed fitting.

I'm not so sure now.

Seattle was its usual self as I reflected the cold miserable weather rugged up in sweats and Uggs. With my hands tight on the leather steering wheel, pressed the gas, turning into the street and off I drove.

Montesano will either be a revelation or the death of me. This trip is pinnacle due to the number of knee-jerk moves I've made during December in this monumental game of chess. As soon as my fingers are off the playing piece, dark or light, mistakes are instantly recognized. Pandemonium is all that remains. My chest thumps in panic and fear of the unknown, leaving myself wide open for the opponent's move.

It doesn't help my opponent, well… partner is mute in communicating, and it's utterly crucial I have a conversation with him.

Christmas Eve is supposed to be beautiful, but I'm only full of trepidation. I've lacked sleep for the better half of a week, unable to keep down my good to stress foods and I'm beyond worried about Christian.

Why hasn't he called?

I've officially stepped away from Seattle Daily, as everything is finalized. As of the 1st of January, I'll be a free woman to write when, where and what she pleases. Montesano seems the best option away from the city boiling pot, so I can get things straightened. There are huge changes on the way, but the question is how am I going to tell my loved ones.

Since first light, I tossed my quilt to the floor. I was bone tired spending all hours waiting by my cell urging it to ring, but I needed to move if I planned to be in Montesano by nightfall. Staring at my reflection, I wondered if I'm making the best choices and I knew mirrors only show what we look like. And I looked like shit, this reflection was not who I am. But who was I? Currently an unemployed confused woman. My attempt to find the old Ana by slapping on layers of concealer, trying to disguise the dark circles, she barely appeared. There were no best work attire and four inches heels, instead, I was dressed in sweats, Uggs, and a messy bun.

Even though it's a three hour trip to my parent's place, each mile on the road was a struggle. My mind wondered, over thinking every scenario between Christian and I. Did I say something for him to become so silent? The fear was setting in. Was I pushing too much? And that single word was threatening to overwhelm me, but I couldn't. I needed to drive, so blinking back the tears were my only option.

Christian had been reticent for the past few days, other than a single message informing me he was back. I appreciated the kind gesture, but it felt he had taken a step back from whatever we were doing. Luke doesn't believe it one second that he doesn't like… love me.

"Ana he's nuts about you," Luke pointed to Christian's manuscript on my desk, still unread. "The phone calls, messages… and flowers. He makes the average man look bad, and he doesn't even live on the same continent." Luke said.

He was correct, I had been spoilt, but that doesn't mean he's into me, maybe he's being… pleasant about the situation.

"I'd like to believe you, but Christian's gone… it's mute." I slumped into my chair, spinning it back and forth not wanting to make eye contact.

"Ana he was facing some horrific shit. Anyone with two working brain cells could identify that in his novels, but he chose only one person to share everything with. Fuck he gave you the ok for the interview and you turned it down!" All the spinning in my chair was making me nauseous, and I needed to stop.

Holding my hand over my mouth, I relaxed, "I thought…" I didn't want to believe the obvious, but I guess Luke will lay it down for me.

"You thought many things… too many in fact and over evaluated. Maybe write the piece as a freelancer, it would do wonders for your career." Luke said.

I couldn't break his privacy. It wasn't my story to share, and being too involved I didn't want to become the next person to break his trust.

"No." I firmly stated to Luke, shaking my head.

"Woah… are you off your fucking rocker?" Luke walked to me, leaving his chair behind, "Someone call 911 stat; Ana is losing her shit ladies and gentlemen." he pointed to me, ensuring the whole office was listening.

Trying my best to hush his words, my hand covered his mouth to stop this nonsense. But no matter how hard I tried he continued to mumble through my fingers.

"Shut it… I fucking can't." I hissed through gritted teeth.

The mumbling stopped and I slowly released my hand as he nodded to remain calm.

"Then give him what he wants." Luke suggests, "Don't be an idiot Ana."

The words tumbled out of my mouth, "He loves me."

It was the only scenario that made sense to the whole situation. He had never said those exact words, but I refuse to believe he doesn't. This mute behavior is destroying my heart and my mind is quickly following.

"So where is he now?" Luke asked raising a brow.

I shrugged, "I'm guessing back on his remote property in the outback."

"Fucking Australia?" He squawked, "But I thought he would have…"

I didn't know for sure, but I had confidence no matter where he was, the outback, Katherine or Darwin, I hope he was as miserable as I was.

A shrug seemed fitting, as I stared at Christian's manuscript and then back a Luke. Life was moving on, and I didn't want to fall behind.

"I'm sure he'll come around." he rubbed my shoulder, and the comfort was relieving but it was far from the void of Christian.

"No," I held his hand to stop, "Luke I don't think that's true or he would be here already, or I would be in Australia."

"Oh come here Ana, I'm going to miss you," and it was a hug I needed.

"I'm going to miss you too, you big lump." I snuggled into his chest.

Everything, in turn is a gamble, naturally, I wasn't a good player no matter the odds, or a game of cards or chess, I was out on a limb waiting for the branch to snap. I had my doubts between Christian and I. Chance played its part, but sometimes the slightest things change and a random moment links. Fate. This is how we connected but was fate pushing us apart too? It niggles in my mind that maybe we weren't meant to be.

It's the waiting which hurts the most. I could not help but stare at my cell, resting on the console, insisting on my opponent's next move.

…..

THE POSITIVES OF WINTER, are warmly spiced tea blends, carols, and the holiday season. The negatives are cold, numbed hands, miserable weather and slick icy roads.

My drive was tagged by a lingering grey cloud from Seattle. There was only 35 miles to go. It seemed like the longest stretch home to Montesano. The twitch of my fingers, tapping, stroking the wheel and gear shift, my stare pinged from road to cell. No matter how many times I stared it remained quiet.

"Ring… please call me!" I muttered to myself.

I tried singing to ease my anxiety, or thinking of new year resolutions I'll never keep. My prayers were answered as my cell began to vibrate something chronic. Quickly pulling over, not risking an accident, I gasped identifying the Australian code 61+.

Doom and foreboding gloom wanted to escape in an onslaught of screams. The fear that I have no control over what was going to be said, my heart racing, thumping at a worrying rate. Through all the commotion I almost dropped my cell and pressed receive call.

"Hello?" my voice was barely audible as it croaked into the cell.

Please be Christian, please be Christian.

"Merica Girl, it's-" the Australian twang wobbled, as he continued to strain his final words, "Mr Jason Taylor."

"Tales?"

The shock was an understatement, I couldn't imagine why he would be calling. Images flashed before my eyes of Christian injured or dead. Gripping the cell tight, my right manicure was being munched by my teeth, chipping at the nail-polish and glitter.

"Oh God," I gasped, "Tell me Tales, is he hurt? Did something happen... please tell me." I begged, tears threatening to fall as my chest ached deliberating over the horrible scenarios. "Oh God, Tales," I wailed into the speaker, unsure what to think.

"Merica Girl… Ana… hey, he's not injured or in the hospital. But I know there must be something wrong." I swallowed, slightly relieved but unsure what Tales was trying to tell me. "Tell me what happened between the two of you?"

I tried my best to catch my breath. I needed to relax, but I was anxious to share personal information, even if Tales was Christian's good friend.

"Ask him." the words blurted out, being friends they must have discussed it. Why was he relying on my answer?

"Don't give me the run around Merica Girl, I haven't heard from him in days. I'm worried shitless," You're not the only one Tales, "He wasn't himself before he nicked off. In the few years I've known him, I've never seen him like this… ya know?" Tales said.

Exhaling my held breath, I whispered into the cell, "Yeah… What? hang on what do you mean?"

"I thought you two lovebirds only had a falling out or something?"

"Honestly Tales, I'm not even sure." I beat my skull on the headrest.

The line went silent for a moment, "I'm confused. I thought things were going well, he couldn't shut up about you, blabbing about everything. All. The. Time. What I do know is the fella loves ya… alcohol works wonders on a quiet man. He confessed his heart, and a few days later he packed up and was gone."

Maybe something had happened. Questions flew in my mind, did he reveal everything to his friend? Our relationship? His past relationships? The struggles with his mother? Oh God, his childhood abuse? Most worrying is he was still missing.

"Listen, Tales, his mother is visiting tomorrow I can try talking with her, there is a possibility she's heard something."

Really Ana? They haven't spoken in years, this is a dead end.

I need to be positive, it's Christmas and I'm owed a fucking miracle with how the state of my life is progressing.

"If I hear from him, I'll let you know." I firmly stated.

"But, you love him right?" I tried my best to blink back the tears hearing that word, he still hasn't said to me.

"Yes... of course, I do."

There was no denying it. It's obvious that very first night we were drawn together. His words, his passion, and those endless stars and snowflakes.

"Well thank fuck for that," he chuckled into the speaker.

"If I hear anything I'll let you know, I need to get going and I appreciate your call."

Click.

I disconnected the call.

I was in limbo, he loved me and he wasn't only missing from my life but others as well. Instantly my stomach roiled, this is all too much for me to handle, Christmas wasn't supposed to be filled with unnecessary stress.

Lunging to the door handle, trying my best to open it, but my seat-belt was holding me back. It tugged hard over my chest, winding me. My fingers fumbled with the latch as the door swung open. I sprinted onto all fours hurling everything my body had to give. Which wasn't much.

The cool air took my breath away, as the combined stench of vomit and pine filled my nose.

Dear life when I said it couldn't get any worse, it wasn't a challenge.

…..

I WEPT FOR HOURS, unsure how to press on. As the cloudy day turned into the dark of night, I was late and my mother would be calling. Obviously, I didn't need the unnecessary distraction while on the road.

The drive was dark and my head was foggy. I wasn't sure if it was due to what was weighing in my belly or the overall lack of sleep. The stars began popping out one by one and suddenly the first snowflake fell on my windshield. Christian. It's Christian I think of every time.

Small rainbows flared on the road through the windscreen, as headlights whooshed past me. In the distance, the stars were becoming brighter and brighter. My eyes left the road for a split second as the familiar chirp sounded on my cell. Snatching the phone, the name "Christian Grey" lit up the screen. It was a message. As I tried to read it, the stars were shimmering too bright, and I swerved unable to see where I should be driving.

Everything slowed down, to a snail pace as I floated like a snowflake landing abruptly until the black sky took hold. Darkness, silent, sleep.

…..

"HEY LITTLE LADY," A voice said.

A warm hand held tight, squeezing my own in regular pulses. It was when they stroked my forehead everything began to hurt. I let out a yelp, deep from the back of my throat expressing my pain.

"Oh, this is wonderful news…Carol, she's awake tell the emergency operator." the voice called out to another.

"Oh, Nicholas I'm already on to it... Yes, I'm still here. The young woman is awake, the only injury we can see is a small gash on her forehead, but we're unsure how long she's been out in the snow…" her voice began to fade as if she were walking away from me.

My eyes blurred as flickering lights strobbed around me. In the distance, the sirens blared and the rainbow of colors changed to hues of blues and reds.

"Wh-wh-what's going on?" My teeth chattered as the cold sunk into my bones, "Wh-wh-where am I?" I continued to shake.

"The EMTs are here to help you, little lady," the deep voice notified me. "It was only by chance we saw you. Your vehicle rolled down the embankment. Praise the Lord your headlights remained on, as that's what caught my attention. You surely gave me and my wife a scare." he said.

Trying to focus on the man's features, something dripped down my face. It was an involuntary response as my hand tried to wipe the moisture away when I saw the red on my hand, instantly my heart began to race.

"Oh my God, it's bl-bl-ood."

"Sweetheart, you were in an accident," I could hear grinding and hammer sounds, "They are just breaking you free now. You are a Christmas miracle."

"Th-th-thank you" was all I could manage.

"What is your name dear?" He asked, never letting my hand go.

"Ana… Anastasia…" I hoped he would give me his name.

"Nicholas." he laughed a jolly chuckle.

Everything moved quickly, as the jaws of life cut me free, from my destroyed car. My ears were ringing as the sirens merged into a loud roar.

"Head laceration, rib bruising, was found unconscious…" a firm voice stated, but I couldn't focus on the fuzzy figures surrounding me.

I felt as if I were being pulled limb by limb. The pain was unbearable, it hurt. My head, my chest and a dull pain around my waist. Voices I didn't recognize were mumbling over and over, but all I knew I was cold as my muscles tightened and teeth began to chatter.

Lying back horizontal, the sky above twinkled. The stars were beautiful as images of my sparkly shoes, the cosmos that night in Australia and Christian burst through my mind.

"No further visible injuries. Ma'am, ma'am stay with me, now where does it hurt?" touching my head, it pounded and I remembered the blood. Why was I incredibly sleepy?

"Here," I indicated to my forehead as my hand shook, "my chest, and," I whimpered, "around my waist… I'm so cold… and feel… tir-ed." my speech slowed, as my eyes grew heavy.

"Are you allergic to any medications, diabetic, asthmatic?" the voice was coming in and out.

Admitting made it real, "I-I-I'm pregnant… the baby needs to be o-o-kay." I bellowed out, my tears were dripping down my face, pooling in my ears. Why hadn't I thought of it sooner, my baby.

Words, shouted left and right. I couldn't focus who was speaking, as it was causing my head to spin.

"Woman in late 20s."

"Head lacerations."

"Bruising to torso and stomach."

"Confirmed early pregnancy."

"Direct to Summit Pacific Medical."

Blinking back my tears, I whispered as my throat was hoarse and dry, "I-i-i-s everything going to be ok… is the baby—" I sucked in my lip, I couldn't say it.

I realized it was another gamble I had taken, a move which flashed before my very eyes, but this little flash meant everything.

"Ma'am I need you to relax, please remain on the gurney…"

I was panicking and couldn't breath as everything began to look like small snowflakes dotting my eyes. As they closed, the full spectrum of colors, my very rainbow of light flamed my vision until it all grew black.

…..

WHAT A FUCKING NIGHT! The devil has danced in my skull as a dull ache lingered in my head. Maybe an AA-Bomb would do the trick. Getting up seemed problematic as something was ahold of my hand. Flinching back my hand, something bit my hand as it stung. Fucking ouch. Opening my eyes there was only white and an extreme bright light. Shutting them instantly I enjoyed the darkness again.

This wasn't right, nothing was familiar, only foreign. A regular beep bounced around, and the disinfectant pine odor engulfed my senses, making my insides roil. Protection was my first thought as I tried to wrap my hands around my belly but was stopped. Trying for a second time fluttering my lids, the anxiety was boiling over, making me feel sick to my stomach.

"Oh sweetie, I'm so glad you're okay." my mother held my hand tight, and I noticed her other hand was holding a bundle of tissues. "Relax baby girl, don't pull on the wires and IV."

"Momma?" I opened my eyes wide, trying to see straight, "Where, what… what's going on?"

Staring at my hands shaking at the unknown, there was medical equipment around me. A drip, heart monitor attached to my chest, and a clip on my index finger.

"Annie you were in an accident outside McCleary."

I rubbed my aching head, to feel a soft bandage over a small section on my forehead. The thought of blood tried my memory.

"I watched the nurse stitch you up, all twelve in fact, you were out cold, but I'm so glad you're awake now." my mother stated.

The light blaring through the blinds on the window made me think I had been sleeping for a while, "What time is it?"

"It's morning… early."

"Well Merry Christmas, this is just the icing on the cake," I huffed to myself. A wave of warmth pushed from my stomach to my throat, and I knew at any moment I was going to be sick. "Mom… I'm going to be—"

I cupped my mouth but my fingers were going to hold back the force of vomit. It was already too late the moment I felt it coming. I tried to get up, but my body faltered and through sheer instinct I hurled my insides over the edge of the bed.

"Oh Annie," was all I heard my mother say, as my ears clouded over and eyes blurred.

I felt like shit. Everything tasted like shit. I hate this.

"Well it's good to see you're awake, and I'll get something for the nausea." I looked to see a large nurse checking my file and IV. Using the back of my hand I wiped away the remnants of my vomit. Embarrassed by the whole ordeal, I knew soon I would need to tell my parents about my pregnancy with the author who was currently MIA.

"Is this nausea due to the head injury?" my mother questioned the nurse.

"Umm," the nurse, looked at me and I closed my eyes, feeling everything drain from my face, "Oh the saline can upset some people's stomachs after a head injury. Now Ana are you in any pain?" crisis averted.

I nodding "yes my pride," I grimaced.

"Oh Ana, don't worry about a thing, you were in a terrible accident and we need to get you all mended. Now shortly the doctor will be seeing you."

Within minutes my room was cleaned, and smelling of that God awful pine disinfectant which didn't help my stomach one bit.

Trying to play back the accident, no matter how hard I tried it remained a hazy mess.

"Momma."

"Yes sweetie." she answered.

"I need to let Grace know that Christmas lunch is off. Can you pass me my cell." Right before my eyes, I could see Christian's name flashing before me. He messaged me, I was trying to read it… and the accident. " Mom can you please give it to me… now." but she only shook her head.

"Why are you shaking your head, I need my cell… this is urgent. Really important Mom." I felt the tears welling in my eyes.

"Sweetie, it's probably in the wreckage, your car is being towed later today."

"No, no no," my throat closed as I looked up at the ceiling, trying my best to blink away the tears, but there was no stopping them… they fell.

"Annie it's ok, it's just a cell, I'm sure we can find Grace's number. Remember sweetie these things can be replaced, you on the other hand can not."

…..

CHRISTIAN

IF YOU HAD ASKED me a month ago if I would be on a whirlwind trip across the globe, there wouldn't have been an answer, only silence. But this woman, oh God this woman, she infuriates me but makes me feel whole. With the short time we spent together she stripped me back bare, to a single bright light. Now I'm opened to seeing the full spectrum not only white and the shades of greys to black which I had been clouded by for years. This trip is for the better, clearing my past, amending broken trust and building a strong relationship all for the better.

After confessing, spilling every detail of my life to my best friend Tales, hiding from the truth was no longer an option.

"I love Anastasia Steele, and she makes me a better person." I yelled out to the vast landscape, as my words echoed into the distance. Not regretting my words, I still needed the courage for what I wanted to do next and drew back a large gulp of XXXX.

"A better drunk I say," Tales laughed clinking our bottles together. He slapped my back almost winding me, but I laughed and enjoyed sharing my secret.

The following morning hungover and regretting nothing, I made my way to Darwin catching the first available flight home. I didn't know what welcoming party I would receive but that didn't matter. I was amending my trust, building up our relationship.

Since arriving back on home soil, my mother and I have spent the last few days getting to know each other again. Expressing our pain, troubled past and the steps to overcome these issues. We needed to build a future as Mother and son again.

Only a few days ago I suggested my mother to contact Ana. My girl didn't know the wiser, I was staying in Bellevue, only fifteen minutes from her own apartment. It was like GT knew who my mother was talking to, as the old girl flapped her tail back and forth. When Ana gave my mother an invitation for Christmas lunch, we both took it as an open invitation.

Now only a block from her childhood home, I felt as though I was a child again. Excited about Christmas morning, waiting to see my present, Anastasia Steele. The thought of her name, made my heart beat out of my chest. I looked down at my gift, a precious bag filled with every kind of snowflake I could find but it's the small box I'm dying to hand her. GT barked on the back seat as she could sense we weren't far away, wagging her tail excitedly to see her girl too.

"We're here." my mother sang, even though it's early days we are both making an effort.

"Thanks Mom, I truly appreciate it." I rested my hand over hers.

The Steele's residence was a beautiful family home, with immaculate gardens, a white picket fence, and shutters over the front windows. It's obvious where Ana gets her love of the holiday spirit as the whole front yard was covered in Christmas cheer.

"I love you with all my heart, but you could have at least shaved." my mother said.

I rubbed my face, enjoying the length of my beard. It had been many years since I've experienced weather anything remotely this cold, let alone the threat of snow. This was for protection and adaption to the weather.

"What would Ana think," she shook her head, "that you're some outback caveman." But of course a small smile formed on her face.

"I doubt she will even worry about my facial hair Mom." and I smiled with her.

We walked up the stone path to the front door. My hand rested behind my mother's back and ensured GT was on a leash. Pressing the front door bell we all waited.

Nothing.

Our only answer was a gust of cold air through the porch. Looking through the front windows I couldn't see a soul within the house.

"Call her." Mom suggested.

Only, I was surprised to hear her voice message, "Ana Steele, leave your name and number and I'll get right back to you."

Turning to my Mom her face mirrored my own, confusion.

"Maybe they attend morning mass for Christmas, we are a few hours early darling." Mom said, but something wasn't adding up and GT had the same suspicions.

"Stay by the car, I'll ask a neighbor," I started to walk, "to see which church, I'll be back in a jiffy." I called out to her, almost next door.

As soon as I was out of sight of my mother, GT and I ran to the neighbour's door and knocked hoping they would be cooperative.

Keys jingled, and the door creaked open, "Good morning, Merry Christmas Sir," and then a small woman with white hair, popped out her head, "and Ma'am." Even GT barked to say hello.

"What can we do for you son?" the man asked.

"I'm wondering about the Steeles next door," I pointed to the house, behind the bushes, "they aren't home, you wouldn't happen to know when they would be back?" I had my fingers crossed that they were only at church.

The woman gasped, and looked at her husband, "Oh haven't you heard, their daughter was in a nasty accident last night down near McCleary." the older man said.

"Oh Carla was telling me the state of her vehicle was terrible, and being Christmas, it's so unfortunate…"

The woman continued to list through details of the accident, but everything seemed to buzz in my ears. I didn't know how to breathe, think…

"Are you alright son?" a large hand gripped my shoulder, "you're looking a little pale, and easy there woofie." GT's barking brought me back to reality. The reality Ana maybe gone.

"GT heel," and she stopped. "I'm sorry about this… is Ana ok?"

"I don't know," the couple looked at one another, but I could read their faces, it was bad. Maybe I was too late. "Carla and Ray were heading back to the hospital early this morning…"

"Which hospital?"

In unison the husband and wife said, Summit Pacific Medical. In a half ass effort, I wished them a Merry Christmas and thanks. Running back to the car, I punched the hospital into Google trying to find an address.

"Mom, car now." I hissed.

"Christian, what's wrong?" she sat in the driver's seat, waiting for an explanation.

"No mom, we need to go…" feeling my world crashing, I pushed my phone into her face, not caring how I was behaving, "Here, right now." I panted.

"What's wrong, what's happening… why are we going to a hospital 20 minutes away?" Mom said, panicking unsure what was happening.

"It's Ana, and you better make it ten."

…..

ANASTASIA

"YOU NEED TO TRY and eat something," I shook my head like a toddler, I knew my stomach wouldn't hold it in, so there was no point. "Well at least drink, you need to drink more fluid for your tests."

It had been a few hours and I still didn't have the heart to tell her, my abdominal ultrasound is for my pregnancy.

Reaching over to Momma I gave her hand a gentle squeeze. I wanted everything to be back to normal, but it seemed hopeless since it all started because I craved a more, a meaningful career.

"Did you hear from that author again?" Mom asked.

I lied as my head shook feeling guilty by my omission.

I had, but my cell was somewhere in the wreckage. For all I knew his message was to tell me goodbye, or that he was traveling to another country to get away from me. There was no doubt, Christian Grey owned my heart, and that he will be forever a part of me, as my hands cupped my stomach.

"Well honey, I'm glad you are still with us, and especially home for the holidays." she rubbed my arm, trying to smile, and keeping it together for the both of us.

I wanted my father here with me too, but the non talker in the family always wears his heart on his sleeves. He was devastated seeing me unconscious last night. So his support has been from the waiting room, and he will wait until I'm one hundred percent.

"Me too Momma." I whispered.

Life was changing and I didn't know how to tell her what was happening. My lease is ending, no job and I might be returning to Montesano on a more permanent basis.

The highlight of my life, living with my parents at almost 30.

"Please don't get upset with me, but I need to get your father home, keep him occupied in his workshop, he's a mess dear. I better make a start on the food too, the morning is almost over. Will you be ok here for a few hours?"

An elderly doctor entered the room, "Well if everything looks good on the scan, you will be good to go later tonight, just in time for Christmas supper." he rubbed his swollen belly.

"Thank you doctor," Mom rubbed her hand over my cheek, pinching it like I was five again, "I'll be back in a few hours, love you sweet heart."

"Love you too Momma."

As she left the room, I flicked my head back waiting for the onslaught of questions. Instead, I only received a technician with a large ultrasound machine and a rather intimidating wand.

"Now Ana, it's good to hear you're better after that commotion last night. I'm doctor Nowell, I work within the Obstetrics department."

"You're a baby doctor," I gulped and wondered what was the fate of my baby.

"Now I've heard you have a little one on the way." he said.

I gave him all the details I knew, since I hadn't seen my OB in Seattle since everything had happened at a lightning pace. He assumed I was no more than six weeks along and needed a transvaginal scan.

My eyes didn't leave the wand, since it was two times the size of BOB located in my top dresser drawer.

"Don't stress, I only need to insert an inch, two at most, depending on the position of your uterus." I nodded, hoping it was the truth. "So no bleeding or cramping since the accident?" I shook my head.

"I had a little pain, but I think it was my seat belt bruising. I was nauseous and threw up once." I said.

"These are all great signs." he checked off within my file.

As Doctor Nowell was about to push the wand inside, there was a commotion outside my room.

"I'm sorry Sir, but you can not enter the patient's room, if you're not family." A voice called out.

"But that's my girlfriend in there," a deep voice bellowed.

"Christian?" My face wrinkled and I lowered my legs, pulling the sheet up tight around my chest.

"Ana?" Christian yelled.

"Christian can you settle down, you are disturbing the whole hospital."

"Grace?" I swear I heard her.

"Do you want to let the poor soul in, or do you want him to bellow down the corridors longer?" Doctor Nowell asked.

I nodded, realizing this was it. This was real and Christian was real.

"Sir, sir, sir, you can not bring a dog in here." a nurse called from my door.

"I don't—" Christian hissed at the poor woman. "Ana, oh fuck… I didn't know if you… I —" I held out my arms, he dropped a bag to the floor and engulfed my sore body. "Ana" he mumbled into my chest, and I couldn't help but breathe in his scent. "GT, go to Grace," he instructed. She barked, waiting for my reply.

"I'm fine girl." smiling at the beautiful dog, shooeing her on, "Hang on, Grace?" I asked Christian. I did hear that name correctly?

He nodded, and cupped my face. We stared into each others' eyes, and I was happy to see those stormy greys again. My lips parted and we kissed. Pulling back to catch our breath our foreheads touching.

"I've missed you," I whispered.

"I thought I lost you forever." He pushed his lips to mine again.

"Me too." I whispered back on his lips.

"Hmm, now since you're both reacquainted, it's imperative I complete this scan." Doctor Nowell announced.

"Scan?" Christian said.

"Yeah please don't panic. I had some bruising on my ribs and stomach, they are checking to see if there is no internal damage." I nodded to the doctor.

"Ok, back in position Ana, and I need you to relax."

"Woaaah! Hold it right there, you are not going to defile my girl with that!" he pointed to the wand.

"It's for a transvaginal scan, we can check that everything is in working order, her kidneys, bladder, and uterus."

"There's something wrong with your uterus?"

"Possibly." the doctor gave a vague answer.

"Oh Ana," he rubbed my cheeks and I craved his touch.

I winced as he inserted the wand. After a moment the pain eased and he began his measurements of my kidneys and bladder.

Seeing this man, with his arms wrapped around me, was the best Christmas present anyone could ask for.

"Christian,"

"Mmmm" he sounds as his eyes are studying the small screen.

"Do you ever want kids?" I bit the inside of cheek hoping he says the right answer.

"Of course, and only with you." he turned to kiss my lips.

"Well that's a good thing you love birds," the doctor said, "because see that right there," the doctor pointed to the blip on the screen. "That's your little bundle of light right there… by the looks of it 5 weeks and 4 days."

"We're having a baby…" Christian said.

I couldn't say a word and only cry tears of joy.

"Ok I'll leave you too for a moment, as I print a few images." Doctor Nowell informed us.

I let out a breath of relief and his hands went straight to my belly. Christians lips claimed my own. Hot, hard and slow, everything I've missed. Not his beard of course, but we can discuss the finer details later. His kiss enters the light of my soul as the beeps of my monitors drift away and only the sound of our hearts are heard.

I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be. Right here with him. Nothing matters except for that, because deep down we are both on a journey and this is just the beginning.

"I have a gift for you," He pulled back, furrowing through the Holiday themed bag.

In opening a small box he placed something in his hand. My hands shook not knowing what to think, he slowly opened my palm, tracing the lines, putting a cold object in my hand and carefully closed it shut.

"Here you are, my snowflake. You are the essence of my light. Merry Christmas."

I opened my palm to see, a diamond snowflake pendant.

-THE END-