Loki's boots hit the pavement.
The sunbeams engulfed him immediately and he had to blink to let his eyes adjust. Being finally back in his usual clothes it was just nearly warm, and the light wind had found a way to somehow fill him.
Loki wondered what was the matter with him, to be so engrossed in thoughts about the weather. Perhaps it had to do with the fact that he'd felt nothing but barely present air conditioning for the past week.
The two agents at his sides lead him forward, into his new probation home, where he would remain under house arrest until further notice. So, possibly forever. His hands were still bound together in large, heavy metal cuffs (as if they would ever stop him from turning on his captors if he so desired), but he was still able to look up and briefly examine the tower.
It was obnoxiously prominent.
"This is a terrible idea," said Tony, for approximately the hundredth time.
"Relax," said Steve, who was standing with his arms crossed just a few feet away from him in the otherwise empty lounge. "I don't like this either, but there's no point complaining now. The decision was already made."
"It's my tower," grumbled Tony irritably. "I should get the final say in who actually gets to live in it." He paused. "Wait, I do get the final say. How the hell was this arranged without my consent? Who gave the approval?"
"I did." Pepper walked into the room with a tired expression and a manila folder tucked under one arm. "Seeing as it is actually our tower. I have at least 12% of the decision, remember?"
Tony stared at her. "Well, why would you make it without me?"
"Would you have ever agreed to let Loki in here?"
"No, I would tell you that letting Loki anywhere outside of SHIELD's darkest, deepest holding cells is completely crazy. You all remember New York getting blown to bits, right? And that he kidnapped Jess? And now you've all suddenly changed your minds because of one eavesdropped conversation?"
"If you were there, Tony, you'd have changed your mind, too," said Steve reasonably. "Jess was right about him, he is changing. You should have seen it. She was practically handing herself over as a loyal subject and he begged her to let him rot. At the very least he cares about what happens to Jess more than he cares about his freedom, and that's saying something. And it's not like we're just letting him go, we're trying to rehabilitate him. Under the right guidance and supervision he can safely do that."
"Cap," said Tony slowly, "he's the God of Lies. How do we know it's not all a master plan to get us to trust him? That him turning Jess away wasn't just him trying to get us to do exactly what we're doing right now? What if he's playing a long game and we're falling straight into it?"
"We don't know," said Steve. "That's why he's here and not anywhere else; this way if he turns on us the six most able people in the world to take him down plus a pissed off teenage mutant are literally just in the other room."
"He's right," said Pepper. "We're the good guys, Tony, and that means we're gonna have to make decisions that make us uncomfortable."
"Sir," said JARVIS's voice, interrupting their conversation. "Loki is here. Two agents are waiting with him downstairs."
Pepper bit her lip. Steve tensed visibly. The air stood still.
Tony turned to Pepper. "Maybe it's making us uncomfortable because it's the wrong fucking decision," he snapped. "Now let's go, Jess is probably already on her way down and I'll be damned if I let him anywhere near her when she's alone."
Jess's feet tread down the stairs, swiftly, nearly stumbling as she skipped the ones that seemed unnecessary. Knowing Tony, the elevator in the Avengers Tower was probably as technologically advanced and speedy as they came but it still felt too slow at the moment. By the time she got down her heart was beating wildly in her chest, a combination of the physical exercise (she should really get down to the gym more often) and the anxious excitement bubbling through her.
She pushed open the heavy door and tumbled into the lobby, uncomfortably loud, turning heads. The two large-bodied, unfamiliar agents and Loki turned to look at her all in the same time and she froze in her tracks just looking at him.
Even seeing him here, so easily, it was hard to believe such a brilliantly ideal scenario has been allowed to play out this far.
The rest of the team already stood in the room, grim-faced and oddly quiet. Bruce was fidgeting visibly in the back. Jess opened her mouth, but before she could utter a single syllable the elevator's doors slid open, and she saw the hint of a smile fade out of Loki's eyes as they met with the painfully unforgiving glare of Tony Stark. At his side, Jess noticed, Steve seemed much more hesitant.
Jess's heart beat hard. Out of all the Avengers, it was Tony who worried her the most in regards of his attitude to the Avengers Tower's newest resident.
"Well," said Loki. "These are certainly unusual circumstances."
Jess wouldn't have thought it possible, but Loki's commentary seemed to make Tony even angrier.
"Right," said Steve carefully, walking out of the elevator and looking at the SHIELD agents. "I suppose you guys can go. We've got him."
As the two agents silently made their way out of the tower, Jess glanced at Loki again. He was wearing his usual Asgardian leather clothes again, and still something about him seemed different. He seemed more docile, somehow. Considering everything, Jess supposed that was probably a good thing.
"Let's just make one thing abundantly clear," said Tony sharply the moment the agents were out the door and out of earshot. "Just because we're letting you in here doesn't mean we're all best buddies now, so don't think we're forgetting anything you've done. Pull any of your psychopathic shit again and you're out of here and back in SHIELD custody before you can say 'mass murder'. Have you got that?"
Loki's lips pulled into a somewhat strained smile. "I wouldn't expect any less," he replied.
"And don't think you can get away with anything. You may have magic but this tower is one of the most technologically advanced architectures in the world. Put so much as a toe out of line and I'll know."
"Well, it's not like he's done anything yet," murmured Jess with a scowl. "I don't know if it counts as rehabilitation if you're just waiting for it to go wrong."
Tony glanced at her, his jaw set and a look in his eyes suggesting he was considering arguing with her. "Can't be too careful," he murmured eventually, but didn't press the point further.
"I can show him to his living quarters," said Thor, eerily somber. "You may all return to your previous occupations."
No one argued. Slowly the teammates trickled out of the room, leaving only Thor, Loki and Jess. Natasha lingered at the door.
"You're staying with them?" she asked Jess, her tone and expression revealing nothing.
Jess nodded.
"All right," said Natasha somewhat wearily, and glanced at Thor levelly before finally leaving the lobby.
And then the room turned unbearably quiet.
"Brother." Loki was avoiding Thor's eyes, but the God of Lightning's hard stare was persistent and Loki eventually gave in. He turned to look at his adoptive brother. "I'm glad you are here," said Thor seriously.
Loki did not reply.
"Did SHIELD treat you okay?" asked Jess. "I know they're not the most forgiving bunch."
Turning to face her now, Loki's eyes softened. "They did," he confirmed. And then, "I must say I did not expect your word to be enough to convince anyone of my possible rehabilitation. I had assumed your heroes would shut your efforts down at first chance."
She shrugged. "I got Steve and Nat aboard after our talk," she explained. "And with Thor and Clint I had four out of six Avengers on your side, so once Pepper signed the papers…"
He frowned. "Pepper?"
"Tony's fiancée."
"Why would she agree to my stay? We have never so much as met."
"She is a kind woman," said Thor. "And you will do well to show her respect."
"Of course," said Loki, flashing a grin. "When was I any less than the perfect gentleman?"
"For instance, when you struck Jess and turned her into a pawn in your twisted game," replied Thor levelly. "Perhaps you remember, it happened a month ago."
Loki fell silent at that. He resisted the urge to glance at Jess.
"Come," said Thor, eyeing the both of them. "I will show you the Tower."
After having been shown to his room, Loki did not step out of it again for the remainder of the day and all through the night. The tension that accompanied his arrival to the Avengers Tower seemed like a decent warning of what would expect him were he to accidentally run into one of the Avengers strolling about the Tower. But it was rather unrealistic to attempt to avoid them forever, and Loki was never really one to cower from confrontation too long anyway. On the morning of his second day in the Avengers Tower, Loki was out of his room.
He was bound to have uncomfortable run-ins with every one of the Tower's residents at least once. He might as well get it out of the way as soon as possible.
The disembodied AI that run the Tower (JARVIS, apparently) has informed him that Jess was currently at school, no doubt catching up on what she'd missed in the past month or so, and Pepper, Tony and Natasha were out for the day. So it was little surprise when he turned a corner and nearly ran head first into Agent Barton.
Barton's reaction was immediate. His jaw clenched and his eyes went hard and cautious. Loki couldn't help the smirk that pulled at the edges of his mouth.
"Agent Barton," he greeted pleasantly. "Lovely morning, isn't it?"
Barton's face was a rock solid mask. "Loki," he said curtly.
Loki's smile widened. "I must say I'm pleased to see you again. It's been a while since we've had the opportunity to speak privately."
"Is that right?" said Barton dryly. "What makes you think I'm interested in a chat?"
"Come now, Barton," scolded Loki playfully. "Jess told me you were one of the first to support the idea of my rehabilitation. Surely you don't intend to send me off now that I'm here?"
"Oh, don't be a prick, I didn't do that for you," snapped Clint. "Believe me, it was solely for Jess."
"So I'd assumed," agreed Loki. "At first. It seems to me, though, that after everything you still are softer than you let on. It's like what I said to you the very first time we met. Do you remember that?" Clint froze and Loki leaned in closer, just the sliver of an inch. "You have heart."
"Piss off," spat Clint and turned away from him, walking in the opposite direction. "You don't know jack about me."
Loki let out a melodramatic sigh. "After everything we've been through," he said wistfully. "I thought you'd remember." When Clint couldn't help but turn back to look at him, Loki was grinning manically. "Oh, but you do, don't you? You remember everything. A good soldier like yourself would never forget the betrayal."
"I'm not a soldier."
"Precisely, Barton, you're an agent. You do more than follow simple orders. And oh, the Tesseract really did make you so much more," he drawled, his grin fading into a lazy half-smile that revealed his pearl white teeth. It looked frightfully similar to a wolf's snarl. "It must be terrifying not being able to forget that I made you better."
"Bullshit."
"Deny it all you want. But there is something very close to perfection in what the Tesseract does. I'm quite sure you know this."
"I guess we have different definitions of 'perfect', then. In my book perfection doesn't involve killing innocent people, going against SHIELD and helping a lunatic try to take over the world."
"This type of thinking is exactly the thing that is holding you back, you know," remarked Loki. "Under the Tesseract's influence you were so focused on the goal."
I need a distraction. And an eyeball.
Loki's lips curved fondly at the memory. "There were no fleeting moralities standing in your way then."
Clint gritted his teeth. "Don't make me regret listening to Jess about you," he warned darkly. "You might think you know me, but if you did you'd know better than to cross me."
"Easy, Agent. You sound as if you don't trust me."
"Well, I don't, not even remotely," replied Clint. He took a few steps closer to Loki. "Let's just make sure we're on the same page here, alright? The person I trust isn't you, Loki. It's Jess. And her vouching for you is the only reason you and I are even talking right now, and she is also why I haven't put an arrow through your throat yet. But let me be clear, and I cannot stress this enough." He looked the demigod dead in the eye, unflinching. "The sole reason you are here is because Jess, for some mysterious damn reason, trusts you. Do one thing, anything, that might imply that you aren't worthy of her faith I promise you I will personally throw you off the roof of this tower and I guarantee you that no one in this world or any other would lift a finger to try and stop me. I suggest that you don't try to test me on this." His body language relaxed a little. "So. Do we understand each other?"
Loki gave him a stony look. "Perfectly," he said harshly, all of his teasing suddenly gone.
"Good," said Clint. "And have a wonderful fucking morning. Jackass."
He decided not to purposefully bump into Loki's shoulder on his way around him. But the urge was all too real.
After the failure of Loki's first interaction with an Avenger, Jess told him to try again.
Which Loki supposed was fair, as he really could not expect to go through the rest of his (possibly indefinite) stay at the Tower without talking to anybody. Plus, he did deliberately push at Barton's buttons. That last part bewildered Jess. No, scratch that, it frustrated her. And he understood that, he really did, specifically after her efforts to get him to the Tower in the first place. Yet he couldn't explain his actions to her. He couldn't even explain them to himself anymore.
"I just don't get why you're trying so hard to be put back in prison," said Jess a few days after his altercation with Barton. They were sitting on opposite couches in the lounge; Jess's homework and pens lay on the coffee table, forgotten. "I mean, you barely talk to anyone but me and JARVIS, and when you do you act like an asshole. I know you aren't used to being nice, but it's really not as difficult as you think."
Loki shook his head. "You don't understand," he muttered through teeth gritted in frustration.
"I know I don't," replied Jess. "And I know I can't tell you how to act." She paused, suddenly hesitant. "I'm just worried that you're not letting them see the real you."
"And what's that exactly?"
"Well, I think it can be whatever you want," she said. "To an extent." She leaned over the coffee table, picked up a pen and focused her eyes on the papers in front of her. "Just please try to be civil. I don't want to lose you." Her eyes flickered to him gently. Loki didn't know how to respond.
Just then Thor entered the room, and Loki glanced up at him; it was still odd seeing him in Midgardian clothes. The dark gray T-shirt and navy blue jeans seemed especially mundane engulfing the god.
"Lady Jess," greeted Thor. He looked over at Loki. "Brother."
Loki wasn't sure why Thor kept calling him that.
Neither did he have a clue why Thor now sat himself down beside him on the couch.
"You were rarely seen around the Tower since you arrived," he commented. "What is it that had you so busy?"
Loki opened his mouth and shut it again. He barely remembered in time to bite down the urge to say something sarcastic. He glanced at Jess in a silent plea for help, but she seemed suddenly (and conveniently) engrossed in her schoolwork.
"I've been reading," he said slowly. He wondered why he felt so utterly prepared to bolt.
"Oh," said Thor, his eyebrows rising in interest. "Was it an enjoyable read?"
Loki glanced at Jess again. She pointedly did not look up from her sheets, even though Loki knew for a fact she would not be able to concentrate on working until Thor's booming voice stopped. He turned to look at Thor again.
"…yes."
Jess really was ought to tell him how awkward having a civil conversation could be. Maybe then he would have reconsidered this whole redemption business.
Thor opened his mouth to say something else, but thankfully his attention shifted when Captain Rogers entered the room.
"Jess, Thor," greeted the Captain casually. Then he glanced at Loki uncomfortably. "Loki," he added, his tone a shade darker despite his attempts to hide his obvious disdain. He looked over to Jess, presumably trying to ignore the tension. "What's that?" he asked her.
"Stuff," replied Jess distractedly. "I gotta hand this assignment in by next week. It's nothing too difficult, though; did you need something?"
"I was gonna ask you about something, actually." The Captain sat himself down next to her. "It's about…" He glanced at Loki again, like he wasn't entirely sure he should be hearing this. "Your powers," he completed.
Loki knew that to everyone but him Jess's expression would register as blank. "Yeah?"
"Have you been practicing more with Natasha?" asked Rogers, his brows furrowed. "I know you said you have it under control, but we did make a public promise to the entire world. We just need to be sure."
"Uh, I haven't really had time the past week, honestly," Jess lied through her teeth. "I know it's important and all, but schoolwork has really been piling up. I did miss like a month of homework." Rogers opened his mouth, but Jess cut him off before he could respond. "I know, I swear I'm gonna get back to it. If Nat's too busy I can start by myself, too –"
"So you have been practicing your powers with Romanoff?" asked Loki, rhetorically. Their heads all turned to look at him.
"Yeah," said Jess, frowning.
"That's hardly effective," he commented.
"Natasha is the most skilled fighter of us all," Rogers started. "Just because she doesn't have powers herself –"
"I'm not questioning your spy's abilities," said Loki with a roll of his eyes. "I've seen firsthand what she can do, as you might recall. But regardless of her skill, it is rather hopeless to expect to learn to control supernatural abilities from someone who has only ever seen them being used by someone else. Despite her undeniable talent, if Jess hopes to learn how to use the full potential of her powers Romanoff will do her no good."
"Well, what do you suggest, then?" asked Rogers, plainly irritated. "In case you haven't noticed, we don't exactly have spare powered people running around the tower."
"I could teach her," said Loki with an indifferent shrug.
Rogers's eyebrows shot up. "You?"
"Why not? You have no hopes of ever finding anyone more adapt in such arts than me. And I am hardly going anywhere." He flashed them a smile.
"We can't just leave you alone with Jess and let you both throw fireballs at each other," argued Rogers. "You may not be in chains, but that doesn't mean you're free to do as you will."
"We won't be alone," said Jess, hints of a smile showing on her face. "We're never alone, not in the tower." She looked up at Rogers. "JARVIS will be watching," she reminded him. "If anything goes south, you know he'll alert just about everyone."
Thor nodded slowly. "I agree," he said seriously. "This could be good for both Jess and Loki."
Loki had to stop himself from rolling his eyes again.
"Alright," said Rogers hesitantly. "I guess that does make sense."
Jess grinned. Loki smirked softly and leaned back into the cushions, satisfied by his small victory.
"So then…" Rogers added cautiously. "How does it work? Your… magic, or whatever it is?"
Loki cocked an eyebrow. "Are you asking on behalf of SHIELD?"
Rogers shook his head. "I'm just curious."
Loki shrugged. "It's somewhat difficult to explain to a Midgardian. I hope you aren't busy."
Although Loki's long and delving explanation was Jess's cue to turn her focus back on her homework, it was all she could do to stifle a small smile growing on her lips. She knew a conversation was only the beginning, and that it was no guarantee that things were going to turn out for the best after all but… well, they say that getting started is the hardest part. Theoretically that meant good news.
Jess snapped in and out of focus for the next hour; it seemed that the room's population just kept growing until eventually it held every single one of the Avengers, minus Tony who was spending the day down in one of his workshops. She wasn't paying much attention to the details of what they were all talking about, but it seemed that despite the amount of people in the room, Loki was actually making conversation. And sure, she may have been far too distracted to notice what they were all actually saying, but, well, nobody was yelling. Or trying to kill anybody else. Which, honestly, Jess could hardly ask for anything more at this point.
It was just when Loki was finishing a sentence that Tony finally did walk into the room like the rest of them had, uncharacteristically quiet; Jess had barely even registered his presence. Apparently somehow the conversation had turned to Asgard and to Thor and Loki's past, and Loki had just said something particularly hilarious about his older brother. Jess did not catch what he said, but she was probably the only one who had managed to keep a straight face, as the other reactions in the room ranged from Natasha's soft smirk to Thor's own rolling laughter.
Well. Everyone's besides Tony's.
"So this looks like a fun little party you're having," he commented calmly over their laughter. "You don't mind if I join in, do you? Steve, you mind? Bruce? Thor? Loki?" Everyone's smiles were long gone and the new tension in the room was rapidly building as Tony gave Loki a hard stare. Jess's homework was long forgotten as she eyes the scene warily. "You don't mind if I join, Loki, right?"
Loki stared back levelly, his stony eyes unwavering, face perfectly expressionless. "Not at all," he replied politely. "It is all the same to me."
"I bet." Tony stepped slowly closer, his stance simultaneously casual and on edge. "Sorry, I just had to ask 'cause, you know, you are the guest." His gaze shifted now to his teammates. "You gotta do what the guest wants, it's rude otherwise. And if the guest does something horrifically evil…" He glared at Loki again. "Well, then you just forget about it. Isn't that right, guys?"
"Stark…" murmured Natasha warningly. "Let it be."
"Yeah, you're probably right," said Tony with a shrug. "I mean, Loki, he wouldn't hurt a fly. He's as harmless as an unarmed toddler. I can't really imagine him doing anything wrong; does anyone remember something like that happening ever?"
"Tony, knock it off," ordered Steve. "You're just being antagonizing now."
Tony raised an eyebrow at him. "Seriously? Okay. Yeah, sure, how about that? Antagonizing the supervillain." He shook his head. "How dreadful of me."
"My brother is not a villain," said Thor harshly. "Not anymore."
"Right. Because he's reformed now. He's changed through the power of friendship and maybe discovered the true meaning of Christmas and everything is just peachy."
"You do not have to believe it," said Loki calmly.
"No, we just have to live together with all my friends and fiancée. But hey, I'm sure there's no reason I shouldn't trust you. I mean, it's not like you're psychotic and evil."
"I give you my word that no harm will come to them from my hands."
"As someone who is worldly famous for being a good liar, do you really think I give a damn about your word?"
"Jesus, Tony, what's your problem?" snapped Clint. "If you have something to say, just say it."
"Fine." Tony crossed his arms in front of his chest. "Loki, you're insane and evil and you're never going to change. You may have fooled everyone else, but I see right through you. I don't know what you're planning, but you can be damn sure I'll figure it out and this time you're not going to get away with it. This time when all your glorious plans fall to shit, I'm going to fucking kill you."
"Tony!" Jess stood up and moved to stand in front of him. "Stop it. I get that you don't trust him, alright? I get it. But I do, and believe me, I don't do it blindly. And maybe you don't trust me, either. I understand. But just try. Please. Just try. Please, Tony, just trust him for me –"
"You think that I'm not doing this for you?" Tony looked at her disbelievingly. "I am fighting on this for you, I am trying to help you, this is all for you because you don't see the truth! I'm trying to protect you!" He swung out his arm, wildly pointing at Loki. "From him!"
Jess stared at him wide-eyed, visibly pale and her breathing somewhat ragged, as though she had to remind herself to keep breathing. She struggled to speak. "He won't hurt me," she said shakily.
"Jess, are you alright?" muttered Bruce, frowning softly.
"I'm fine," she answered impatiently. "Just- Tony, listen –"
"No, I heard enough," he said sternly. "In fact, I heard enough from all of you. I'm going back to work." And he turned around briskly, and paced away from them all.
Jess cursed under her breath. "Tony, wait –" After a moment's hesitation, she made to follow Tony down the hall.
Loki rose to his feet from the couch. "Jess," he said. "Jess, leave it –"
Jess whirled around just for the briefest moment. "Don't tell me what to do," she snarled at him before turning back to pursuing Tony.
With the both of them gone, the room was left rather horrifically silent.
"So," said Clint after a while. "Anyone know any good movies?"
"Tony!"
Jess's voice calling his name followed him repeatedly through the corridor, and she didn't stop until he did as they entered the workshop. With an exasperated sigh he turned to look at her, taking in the irritation in her features and her tense shoulders. Her carelessly braided hair swung behind her skull as she came to a halt in front of him. She raised her eyebrows at him expectantly and crossed her arms. "What the hell was that?" she demanded.
"That was two adults talking, Jess," answered Tony curtly, aimlessly fiddling with the contents of his desk. He had no trouble pretending she had nothing to be cross over.
"Was it?" snapped Jess. "Are you sure? Because I saw several adults in there, and you weren't one of them."
"Well, I'm sorry if I find it difficult to forgive a crazy mass murderer," he snapped back. "Oh, actually, wait a minute, no, I'm not. It's like I'm the last sane person in this goddamn mess."
"Oh, that's nice," said Jess sarcastically. "That's really, really nice. So everyone is crazy, except for you."
"Well, they're sure acting like it!"
"And you're wrong." Hazel fire burned in Jess's eyes. "You're wrong, because you won't listen, because you're stubborn to the point of stupidity." She turned away from him, running a hand over her hair.
"Great," said Tony dryly, nodding. "Awesome, now you're mad at me."
"You're goddamn right I'm mad at you," said Jess angrily. "It's hard not to be when you simply refuse to accept that I might be right, and someone else, someone who just so happens to be my friend, is paying for it."
"Oh, he's your friend now, is he?" said Tony. "The guy who killed hundreds for nothing and kidnapped you, that's your friend?"
"Yes."
"Please," Tony scoffed. Jess glared at him. "Listen to yourself. You're not making any sense. This isn't normal, and you need help."
"Oh, fuck you!" shouted Jess before she could stop herself. Tony stopped in his tracks. "Now you think that I need help? Now you think that I'm messed up? Well, I'm not, and I never was. Don't push your own irrational refusal to see things for what they are down on me. I know you're mad at him, okay? I get it. But that's not on me and you need to let that go."
"Why would I want to do that?"
"Because you are an Avenger," said Jess fiercely. "You are fighting like hell to save people, to make this world worth fighting for. Who decides who it is you're helping, Tony? Who says Loki isn't worth saving? Fucking no one. And I'm telling you he is. If you wanna make me believe this world is worth it, show me forgiveness exists. You already did so much, more than I can ever pay back for, but if you don't do this one more thing then I will know that there is no hope, for anything, ever. So get your giant head out of your ass, and look. Look at him, and see a person instead of just a villain. Look."
Tony was quiet for several long moments. He wasn't looking at Jess, his gaze lowered, blankly staring at a random spot upon the floor.
Then he spoke.
"He kidnapped you," he said.
Jess deflated, her eyes filling with something akin to sadness. "Yeah," she said softly.
"He hurt you."
"I know." Jess nodded. "And he will never dream of doing that again. I know you don't want to believe it, but he has changed. He's nothing like the guy who took me from the streets, he's… he's better. He's a person."
Tony looked at her now, and when he spoke he did so quietly, like he was entranced. His face was perfectly clear of emotion. Somehow it was the most emotional Jess had ever seen him all the same. "We didn't know where you were at first," he said, and as he spoke Jess's heart slowly crumbled. "We didn't know if something had happened to you or if you ran or what. A million places you could be. Then the video, when we found out it was Loki. Knowing that made things worse in a way. We didn't know if you were alive."
Jess sighed. "Tony –"
"Do you hear me?" he snapped, suddenly ferocious. He looked like he was physically restraining himself from hitting something. "We didn't know if you were alive. We didn't know if we were going to walk into that building and find you dead, with him standing over your body looking down at his work and smiling like the smug piece of shit he is. We didn't know if you were alive."
As the final words left him his wild anger faded just as quickly as it came. The room was still and silent. They were both completely out of things to say.
Jess was suddenly acutely aware of her breathing.
Then the silence moved. Jess's small feet took her through a stride to him, and without looking in his eyes her arm went curling over him, pressing herself against him and hugging him tight. Automatically Tony synchronized with her, his neck sinking into the curve between her neck and shoulder, pressing her against him like his body wanted to swallow hers and inhaling her scent like it was a drug. And this simple gesture that was everything but spoke volumes just because, saying everything that Jess could not. Saying, Look at me, I'm here. I'm safe. I'm alive. There is life and fight still left in me and I'm not going anywhere. I'm here. I'm safe. I'm alive.
"I just don't want to ever again have to wonder if you're dead or not," said Tony quietly, still not breaking away from her. "I just want to keep you safe."
"I know," said Jess gently. "But Loki isn't a threat to my safety anymore. It sounds insane, I know, but he's like a brother to me. Please don't worry about me."
"Well, that's the thing," murmured Tony. "I don't think I'm ever going to not worry about you. I'm not sure how that happened, you were just a kid we found on a mission and then suddenly we were all signing adoption papers, and… I guess that I just love you."
"I love you, too," she whispered back. "You're my family. You all are."
They didn't move for some time.
Tony opted out of going to bed that night. There was so much on his mind, and a nagging suspicion told him some of it is bound to find a way to trickle into his dreams. It was far easier to convince himself he had urgent work to do than to actually confront the things keeping him up.
2:12 in the morning found him in dire need of another caffeine boost. With his movements erratic as he made his way out of his chair and onto his feet he nearly stumbled over random junk and crumpled up pieces of paper, all of which he'd disposed of earlier lazily by chucking them back over his shoulder. On his way up the stairs and through the tower's hallways, Tony had to blink rapidly to keep his eyelids from giving up on him. Yep, he really needed a good cup of coffee.
The Avengers Tower ran on 100% green energy, but JARVIS's systems were still automatically set to not leave any unnecessary lights on (and honestly, even if they weren't, Steve would probably walk up and down the tower all day turning them off), so the hallways were damn near completely dark and had Tony with a hand on the wall just to make sure he didn't randomly fall over and break his neck, because, come on, that would be a really disappointing way for Iron Man to go.
The darkness meant that as Tony was crossing one of the (frankly far too many) hallways, the soft light coming out of Jess's bedroom seemed as bright as the fucking sun. Tony nearly ignored it, until he realized a number of things:
A. Seriously, 2 o'clock in the morning, on a school night.
B. Didn't Jess like to sleep with the door closed?
C. Doesn't this light seem kind of green?
Hesitantly, Tony crossed the hall and looked into Jess's room. The moment his brain registered what he was seeing, he was really grateful that he hadn't walked away.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" he blurted out automatically, louder than intended.
Jess seemed sound asleep, but that wasn't what had him so alarmed. Loki was standing over her silently, with gentle green light flowing from his fingertips, surrounding Jess's head like a halo. At Tony's outburst Loki swiftly raised a finger to his lips, his other hand maintaining the flow of magic.
"She was having a nightmare," replied Loki quietly, as if that explained everything.
"So you decided she needs you fucking around in her brain?" hissed Tony.
"I stopped it," said Loki impatiently. "Or do you think it's better if she wakes up screaming over things that aren't there?" He lowered his hand, and the green light faded away. "There," he said. "Now she will sleep peacefully until morning."
"Listen to me," whispered Tony tersely. "I don't know what kind of game you think you're playing but I'm not fooled. Alright? So if I find out that you've done anything to Jess just now to hurt her –"
"You know, Stark, I understand why it seems so unbelievable that I might genuinely be interested in rehabilitation," said Loki calmly, "but I don't see why you find it so difficult to believe that I do, in fact, care about Jess. You've had her for what, a week, before you decided to adopt her? Clearly she has that effect on people."
"Yeah, normal people," retorted Tony. "Who aren't murderous or batshit crazy or both." He glanced at Jess. She hasn't stirred, her chest rising and falling carefully as she breathed. "Jesus, just get out of here. And don't mess with her head ever again, you got it?"
Loki arched an eyebrow delicately. "I was simply trying to help," he said casually, and walked around Tony to exit the room. "But you are in charge. After all, adopted or not she is still technically your daughter."
Once Loki was out of sight, Tony let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. Looking down again at Jess's sleeping form his shoulders deflated, and his head nearly drooped.
Fuck coffee, he thought tiredly. I'm going to sleep.
When Jess's alarm went off that morning, she could not remember even a single dream.
She rubbed her eyes with a groan, hazily pulling herself out of her bed. She was about to make a move for the bathroom before she paused in her tracks.
Jess pulled open a drawer at her desk and pulled out her old notebook and a pen. With practiced hands she flipped open the notebook on the last page.
Somehow I always end up here, she thought as she looked at the Trust Page. It seemed kind of silly now, even if it's only been several months since she'd first created the thing.
Clicking her pen, Jess added a line to the list:
Loki: "I could say the same for you. Jessica Cory, was it?"
As she wrote down Loki's first words to her, Jess thought she could remember a sliver of the night's dreams.
Except all she could remember was a little bit of green.
You guys.
So the past few months were kind of crazy, with school stuff and what not, but I gotta say, I really missed this. Seriously. I just love you all so damn much, and this story is so important to me. I'm so, so glad I'm finally updating. In case you were wondering what gave me the motivation to finally get this chapter done, it's all 100% due to the fact that I have a math final type thing tomorrow. Which, also, holy shit. Wish me luck?
I also wanted to say how much I appreciate your support. It makes me so happy. So if you don't mind, please leave a review! I love hearing from you. I'd be super excited to hear your thoughts on this chapter, the story in general, what you hope to see in future chapters or just how your day's been! I hope you enjoy :D