Written by .Leopard about her character Zeb xxxx

Zeb

Light Enough to See

I used to be alright.
I used to be a decent guy; I guess. Yeah, that all changed one day. I don't know why it changed, I don't know how. There was a big gap. One day I was a guy, a mummy's boy, dedicated to helping his mother, and just spent his time hanging round with his friends. I had my freaky gift of mind reading, but apart from that I was an average, good looking guy. The next day, I was a murderer. And I liked it.

I don't understand any of it. It happened so fast. My memories for that day, the 21st of July, her birthday in fact, are blurred. As if they've been messed with. I just remember walking down the stairs, down to the cellar. I think I might of heard something. And then my thoughts change, as if a light switch was turned off, and everything went dark.
My thoughts turned evil. I remember every single one of her screams, all of her cries, all her pleas. I then remember my brother, finding me, shocked, his own blue eyes that matched mine and my mother's so well begging me, even with a sheen of tears. I killed him too. My second murder. And wow, it felt like I'd discovered what I was meant for in this world!

And then everything shifted, it all changed. My powers grew. My mother and brother were dead. And I became closer to my father.
My ruthless, mean father, who had been abusing my mother for years had been so close to leaving my mother and taking my brother with him. Yet, after I killed the two, he became proud of me. He taught me everything he knew. And soon, I didn't even recognize my reflection. Torture had become my fuel. Hearing others' screams made me laugh. The highlight of my week was when father gave me permission to torture a poor soul that had been bad to his business. I became excellent with using many weapons, all that my father left in the shed. Guns, knives, swords... so many weapons. Amazing weapons. I loved those weapons. I still do, it somehow calms me to have a pistol strapped in my belt. To know that it's there if I need it.

I sunk further into my own twisted mind.

And then one day, I heard the little girl. She didn't have any impression on me at first; I'd heard she was a freak around the neighbourhood. I wasn't bothered with her. I knew she would be easy to get to. I was sure, she'd be easy prey. I could maybe kill her, would anyone care if the girl went missing?
But I read her mind, I mean, really read it.

Hearing the secrets in there, I bolted. Yeah, a tough guy like me ran away from trouble, from danger.

And I left her alone.

Life went on. I ignored the truths I had learnt from the little girl, and continued to feed on others pain. I built up a shield though, so that I could no longer hear their minds though. The voices, constant babble and talk were driving me further into insanity.

I mucked up even more at school, without anyone else's inward voices helping me through the questions. I mucked up my friends; I killed a few that stood in my way. The girls that used to seem to follow me in swarms began to grow afraid of my rough behaviour and the rumours of what I'd done.

I began to be ignored.

One day, my curiosity pierced me. I went to the well. I didn't know why the well was important, it just was. There was something down there, and I needed to see it. Somehow, the thing down the well seemed like my fate. It was my destiny.

I didn't go down. Something held me back from unlocking more secrets; I turned around and walked off.

And then it happened. I wasn't surprised when one second kids were in panic. I wasn't surprised when the adults vanished. I was never surprised. Maybe it was impossible to surprise me by then, or maybe I already knew...

So I watched Aurora Spark. She seemed to interest me. She reminded me of my sister I guess. She began to take the town over, not in a possessive way, it was if she cared. I watched her in interest, she seemed good, but something else was interested in her, something evil. Something told me it wouldn't end well for the short, bubbly blonde girl. And in the future I was proven correct.

It wasn't long after the first town meeting that I met Melinda.

Melinda... was a mistake. She also felt like destiny. And I suppose, I'm a guy, it was likely that I'd fall for her. I stayed with her. She would be the Queen of the FAYZ, she'd overthrow Aurora, I knew that much. And I'd be the King if I stayed with her.

I first met her with the little girl. The things I'd seen flashed back to me, but I simply ignored them. I helped her. Went against the goody-goodies. Tortured the girl, Andi, who seemed to protect the little girl.

Melinda and I seemed as if we'd stay together throughout the FAYZ. We were two of the most powerful, two of the most determined, two of the strongest. We would have ruled. Everything could have bent to our will. It would have all been reachable.

Then I met her.

Why was she so special? I had no answers. I treated her like the others. But all along, I knew Melinda and I couldn't be together as long as she existed.

And that was when it revealed itself. Darkness. Darkness called to me so much, Darkness wanted me, but not as much as it needed her. But it couldn't have her. She was mine. I resisted Darkness, and my stupid cousin, who tried to kill me in the well. I spit up with Melinda, I left her with her evil, cruel plans and dreams.

I ignored everyone's thoughts. Stayed as far as possible from the little girl. And I fell in love.

If someone asked me, how a guy like me, a sick, horrible, evil guy like me, ever possibly fell in love with Mia O'Sullivan, I wouldn't be able to answer.

And if someone asked me how Mia O'Sullivan fell in love with me, I would never be able to answer either.

But I need her now. I gave up everything, just to be with her. All my plots, plans, ideas. I gave away the chance to be King. I gave away the chance to be one of the most powerful in the FAYZ. I gave up all the chances to kill. To hear those screams that were my air, that gave me something to live for.

I regret a lot of things. Maybe I regret killing my mother, maybe I regret giving into insanity, maybe I regret ever making rash promises to Melinda I knew I'd never keep, maybe I regret letting myself fall into the depths of insanity. Maybe I regret it all.

But one thing I'll never regret, is falling in love with Mia. Because now she's my oxygen. I don't need to be crazy anymore, I don't need to torture, I don't need to kill; I never did. I just need Mia.

One day, I switched the light off and let everything go dark. But Mia's my torch; she keeps it light enough for me to see.