Sooooo, I was dithering around on the GONE RP forum last night and I happened to look at the slash pairings. One in particular caught my eye, and I thought I'd write a oneshot for it. I'm going to try and make you guess who's POV it's from; though I must admit, it's pretty obvious, especially to those who have read the first rp topic...anyway, this is not an official pairing, but I thought it would be interesting to write an insight into what it would be like if it was. This is the first time I've written anything homosexual, so sorry if it's a bit crap!

Review and tell me who you think it is!

xxx

Never Know

I really want to kiss you. But you can never know.

I think I feel in love with you the first time I saw you. You were controlling the elements, shaping the seas and winds to your will. I can remember how your eyes burnt like emerald fire, how your blood red hair whipped around your exhilarated face as you rejoiced in the power. You were so beautiful I could hardly breathe.

We talked to you after, and I can remember how your eyes flickered suspiciously from one face to the next; I could see how they lit up when your gaze met his. I had known you five minutes and I'd already lost you to him. I somehow managed to squash down the resentment in my chest. I was being silly. I liked boys after all. At least, I thought I did.

I could tell that you were talking to him in your mind all that time at the school. You liked him, I could see that, the way your eyes sparkled whenever he was near you, and I could feel jealousy crushing my heart. And then he went missing and you were so desperate to find him, willing to throw yourself into danger for him. I couldn't let you do that, Mia; I couldn't bear you risking yourself for him. So I stopped you, the only way I knew how. And you hated me for it.

We managed to follow you into the woods, even though I was weak. I have to admit that it did hurt me that you'd drained me; it was almost like betrayal. And then, surprise, surprise, we found you with him again. I have never felt such envy in my life; I had to hurt you, wanted to kill you because how dare you love him? I'm so sorry I hurt you darling; I came to my senses at the last moment, jerked my hand away so the bullet only grazed you. But he came along again, with all his self-righteous anger, and carried you away from me.

And that was when I fell.

I told you once, didn't I sweetheart, that Darkness takes away the pain? It took me over. It told me we needed you with us, and I agreed because I did need you, I needed you more than you could ever know. But you have to understand, that after a while, I had to stop thinking like that. I didn't know who I was becoming because I wasn't...the old me wasn't...I just couldn't accept...I'm straight I tell you!

And the fact is, once I'd come to the conclusion that this wasn't natural, wasn't my fault, that you had cast some kind of spell on me, it made me want to kill you more than ever. And the Darkness fuelled that. It was even worse when I saw you with him. Because then I was in denial and fiercely jealous. But there's more of me here than Darkness now. I'm fighting it. For you. And slowly, very slowly, I'm winning. And if I do win, I'll tell you everything, I promise, I have to tell you. It hurts too much not to. But deep inside, I know I can't. You'll reject me and that will hurt even more.

Have you got any idea how I long for you? Sometimes I let myself dream of telling you, and that you'll run to me, that you'll feel the same way. I'll touch your smooth skin; twist my hands in your silky, flaming hair. I imagine your lips and they're so soft, softer than any guys, and I'm kissing you, in my dreams, pulling you so close, and I'll never let you go...but then the dream ends, like it always does, and you are gone, and I'm alone again, once more, with my love, my jealousy, my regret.

You see, darling, I only know two thing's for sure.

I really want to kiss you. But you can never know.

Please review

xxx