Chapter Ten: Fools In April
"Ouch! You stepped on my foot!"
James quickly clamped his hand over Peter's mouth. Sirius slapped the boy on the back of the head, and the four Marauders started forward, again.
It had been over a month since Dumbledore's "betrayal", and James had become increasingly paranoid.
It didn't help that the Marauders had been punished for jinxing Bellatrix, Narcissa, and Lucius. When they weren't in their classes, they were confined to the Gryffindor Common Room. They hadn't been outside in weeks; not even for Herbology. Professor McGonagall had seen to it that special rearrangements were made, to ensure that the Marauders wouldn't leave the castle.
A clock overhead signaled that it was midnight. The four were creeping under James's invisibility cloak, trying to get outside for a breath of fresh air.
In hindsight, it was astounding that they didn't think of this plan, before. James knew that his dad only wanted him to use the cloak in emergencies. Then again, this qualified as an emergency in the Marauders' eyes.
"Nearly there!" Lupin breathed, as they entered the Entrance Hall.
A clanging sound suddenly echoed through the school, as a dozen suits of armor rushed towards them, trapping them.
"Aw, come on!" James cried, angrily, ripping the cloak off.
Professor McGonagall was marching towards them, looking triumphant.
"Going somewhere, boys?"
"Professor, we just want some fresh air," Sirius moaned, "We're on edge!"
"We've been locked up for over a month," Lupin explained, patiently.
"Forget it," James sighed, "She's not going to back down. After all, she's creating the rules of this game."
Professor McGonagall raised her eyebrows, "This is not a game, Mr. Potter."
"No," James agreed, "It's more like dancing, isn't it? Every step you make, we're right there with an equal step. Neither one of us is going to back down."
He stared her in the eye as he said, "The problem is Professor, the Marauders are right good dancers."
"If you pace anymore, you'll scuff up your shoes."
James shot a glare at Lupin.
"I don't care about my bloody shoes," James finally snapped, though he did collapse onto the couch.
James sighed, restless. He yearned to go outside; to splash by the shores of the lake, or perhaps sneak a broom for a ride.
Instead, he was stuck in a room that seemed to get smaller by the second.
He was beginning to wonder what the difference was between school and prison.
After all, both had overseers, convicts, and most of all…rules.
Sirius seemed to be taking the imprisonment just as bad. He was poking the fire in the grate, absentmindedly.
"Watch it," Lupin cried, as the sparks nearly seared him.
Sirius blinked, "Sorry," he mumbled.
"We hardly need the fire, anyway," Peter spoke up, "It's so nice outside."
"Too bad we're stuck in here," Sirius sighed, "Blasted cousins! You try to do something nice and you end up regretting it!"
"The price to pay for being a Marauder," James said, bitterly.
"Cheer up," Lupin advised, "Why don't you start your homework?"
"Yeah, homework always cheers me up," James grunted, opening his book.
"Do you have the date?"
Sirius groaned, "I dunno. The days keep running together."
"The first of April is next week," Peter squeaked, as if that was helpful.
James looked up suddenly, "April Fool's Day is just a week away?"
The book forgotten, James jumped up, his mind buzzing with excitement.
"We need to plan the ultimate prank!" James cried, "Something that will surely make up for having to be imprisoned."
"No," Sirius said, his eyes shining, "We need a prank that will force us to go outdoors!"
"What do you suggest?" Lupin asked, hesitantly.
James didn't answer. He was grinning from ear to ear.
April Fool's Day saw the Marauders up at the crack of dawn. They slipped into their school robes, gleefully.
This day was made for the Marauders. A day where the pranksters turned into full-blown maniacs.
They grabbed the schematics and blueprints that they had worked on for the past week; disregarding all homework, in the process.
They waited until the others were in breakfast, and snuck down to the main loo.
"Ugh, it reeks!" Peter whined.
"Well, what did you expect it to smell like?" James grinned.
"You might want to get used to it, mate," Sirius chortled, heaving a box of Dungbombs onto the sink.
Peter sighed, and managed to pull something out of a stall.
"What the bloody hell is that?" James asked.
"A boat," Peter wheezed, "I nicked it from the Boathouse."
"Why in Merlin's name would you want to nick a boat?" Sirius snorted.
Peter flushed, "Well, I expect that we're going to need some mode of transportation after this is over."
"Brilliant, Peter!" James clapped him on the back, "Thinking ahead, contributing to the plan, and nicking things. You're coming off nicely!"
Peter smiled, proudly.
Lupin rubbed the back of his neck, "Are you sure about this?"
"Absolutely," James beamed, "It'll be brilliant."
"What if we get in trouble?" Peter squeaked.
"That's the risk I'm willing to take," Sirius beamed.
"I dunno mate," Lupin sighed, "Setting off a few Dungbombs in the corridors is one thing. But this…this could get us expelled. Or worse."
"I didn't think anything was worse than expulsion," Sirius teased.
James had a crazed look about him, "I'd welcome a visit to Dumbledore's Office."
Lupin was surveying him, closely, "Ah, I get it. You're mad at Dumbledore, because you think that he betrayed you. So you're willing to explode his school, just to get revenge."
"You're looking too far into it," James said, simply, "I'm just restless and need to pull off a prank."
The four scrambled to put on their hazmat suits, which they had nicked from Filch's office. They had amused themselves for hours, wondering why Filch would need a hazmat suit in the first place.
"Ready?" James asked, his voice muffled.
"Yes!" Sirius pumped his fist.
"No," Lupin and Peter groaned.
"It's unanimous!" James grinned.
James grabbed the box of Dungbombs, and poured them into each of the toilets.
He then performed a quick spell that flushed the toilets, simultaneously.
"They shouldn't explode for another twenty seconds," James muttered, "That should be enough time for them to get down to the main irrigation tank."
The floor rumbled beneath their feet. A large explosion issued somewhere below.
It was better than the four could've imagined. The water gushed out of the toilets, much like a brown fountain.
Judging by the explosions and shrieks that came from around them, it was safe to say that the toilets, in the other loos all over the school, had exploded, as well.
The Marauders scrambled into the boat, and waited.
Within seconds, a stream of dirty water was pouring through every corridor. After only minutes, it was a roaring river of sewage.
The tide was enough to pick up the boat, sending it sailing down the corridor.
The Marauders laughed, as they watched students struggle. People were either falling into the sewage, trying to scramble out of the way, or vomiting at the mess.
James stood at the bow of the boat, proudly. When they finally reached the Grand Staircase, they roared with laughter.
The water was rushing down every staircase, falling off the landings, so that it appeared to be a giant, disgusting, waterfall.
The staff was in complete dismay. They were running around, ushering the students outside.
The Marauders eventually made it to the Entrance Hall, where they were met with a furious Professor McGonagall.
The four grinned from ear-to-ear as they endured their yelling.
The threats of detentions, expulsions, and letters home meant nothing to them.
For one splendid day, they had thwarted the system.
Professor McGonagall finally gave up, hissing, "Well at least we got everyone out in time."
She pulled out a piece of parchment, evidently doing a head count, "Let's see…the Silverson twins…Smelling, Arthur…but where's Snape?"
"Oh no," James whispered, paling.
"Did anybody see him come out?" Lupin asked, nervously.
Professor McGonagall was besides herself, "You…you…"
The water had poured into the Dungeons, where it was now collecting. The entire Dungeons were now flooded.
"Don't worry," James said hastily, before Professor McGonagall could explode.
They rushed over to the doorway, peering into the flood.
James quickly redressed himself in his hazmat suit, but not before taking off his belt. The belt was specially designed to expand into a long rope, which is exactly what James made it do.
He handed it to Sirius.
"What are you doing?" Sirius roared, right before James dove into the water.
He knew that he only had a few precious minutes, before the suit would run out of oxygen. He swam through the muck, searching for any sign of life.
Through the water, he could hear the sounds of muffled screaming.
James was finally able surface in a room with a high-arched ceiling. The water had not yet reached the top.
The first thing he saw was Snape, trying desperately to tread the water.
"Quit your whining and grab on!" James snapped.
Snape glared daggers at him, before taking James's sleeve. James pulled on the rope. Sirius gave it a massive tug, and the two zoomed back through the water and into the Entrance Hall.
"Wicked!" Sirius roared, thumping him on the back.
"Nice save, mate," Lupin admitted, shyly.
Snape sneered, "You did not save me. You saved yourself. You would've gotten expelled if anything had happened to me."
"True," James admitted, lightly, "I did care more about my own skin than yours."
He broke off thoughtfully, "Still, I can't imagine that there's a worse death than drowning in your own crap."
Snape glared at him, before stomping away.
Roaring with laughter, the Marauders went outside, where Professor Dumbledore was making mock-shelters for the students.
As nighttime drew nearer, Dumbledore conjured sleeping bags, for everyone.
Still dripping with sewage, James watched as Sirius ran across the grounds, laughing wildly. Peter was sniffing the flowers, looking euphoric. Lupin was sitting by the lake, soaking his feet in the cool water.
James grinned and laid back, staring at the stars that dotted the inky sky.