Just because I've gotten a lot of private messages asking if I'm okay and stuff, I'll tell you. I was driving at night and this semi thought he could beat me across the intersection, so he pulled out in front of me. I couldn't stop and there was nowhere to go, so we collided. I had a severe consussion, a broken wrist, and internal bleeding. But I'll be okay; I promise. I get a brand new car and everything. On with the story!

18.

*Katelyn*

The flight home was just a big pain. It was a private flight and I didn't have to deal with any screaming babies or business men talking on the phone, but it was still a pain. It was still loud at takeoff, which only increased my headache. And plus, I had to fill out the report to send back with the plane to the CIA director. Reports are always bad for headaches. Several times I had considered doing a study about it. There would definitely be something there to prove.

Finally done with the report, I set it off to the side and leaned back in my seat, staring out the window at the clouds. I thought about Joe, then, and about everything that I had learned. I then decided that there was no point in avoiding it, so I thought about my feelings towards him.

There was something there; there would be no point trying to deny it. There were definitely feelings there that had been developed in a time that I hadn't remembered until recently. Love. That's the only word that I had for it. I wanted him. I wanted him beside me every second. I wanted him to hold me and whisper things to me. I didn't even care what he whispered – it could be a sweet nothing or it could be some random fact like the thing he had told me about Heinz. I just wanted… him. I wanted us. I wanted to be together. I wanted to be wearing his ring, not Rider's. I wanted a life with him.

I shook my head violently to clear away the thoughts. I couldn't want a life with him. Besides, I had no idea if he still felt the same way about me that he had before. And I was engaged to Rider…

I looked down at the three stone ring for conformation. I thought about the way that he had proposed… so unromantically, but he had proposed all the same. That had to count for something, right?

And then, the plane dropped for the landing and I clutched my seat, letting the thoughts wash away from me. The landing didn't take long, and then I was gathering my bags and stepping off of the plane. Rider was waiting for me, standing off to the side, wearing jeans and a long sleeved Hollister shirt. His curly blond hair was as neatly trimmed as ever and his smile was the same. "Hey," he said, rushing forward to take one of my bags. "Did everything go okay?"

"Everything was fine," I said with a forced smile. "Everything went great."

He leaned forward to kiss me and I noticed how strange his lips felt on mine. Like they just didn't belong there. Like they had never and would never belong there. He pulled away and I managed to keep the smile on my face.

"Welcome back," he said. And then he dramatically lowered his voice. "But beware; your mom wants wedding decision."

Wedding.

Luckily, just then, my mother and father came forward to hug me, asking me questions, which I answered politely. I noticed that everyone was smiling and that everyone seemed happy. But then I wondered: If I told my parents that I wanted to marry someone else – Joe – would they still be happy? Were they supportive of me or the me that they wanted me to be?

A few days after I got home, I sat on the couch with Rider, flipping through a magazine at my mother's request to pick out things that I would want for the house I would have with Rider.

With Rider.

It all just seemed so surreal. I felt like I was being suffocated sometimes. Most of the time. Like now, when Rider had his arms around me and I was pressed to his side. We didn't fit like Joe and I had. Joe and I had fit naturally, our bodies knowing how to meld together.

"I like that," Rider said of the table that was currently taking up the page. "Not too big, not too small."

"Yeah, it's nice," I said.

"Should I write it down?"

"Sure."

He reached for the pen and paper and I turned another page, bored already. I hated all of this wedding stuff. I had begged my mom to just let Rider and I elope, but she had freaked out when she'd heard. She wanted me to have a wedding, so I was going to have a wedding. Fantastic. Shouldn't my marriage be about what I want? Which wasn't Rider…

My father came into the room then, wearing a suit. "Hey, kids; how's it going?"

"We're not kids," I said as a reflex. "I'm eighteen, Dad."

"Still my kid," he commented, dropping into the seat across form the couch that Rider and I were occupying.

"Sure, Dad. Sure."

"Oh, yeah," he said, holding up the folder he'd been carrying. "I guess you did such a great job that the CIA wants you for another assassination in Italy. I only looked at the cover sheet, but it looks pretty interesting."

I took the file, feeling a little annoyed. But, at least another job would give me an excuse to get away from Rider. And my overbearing parents. And everything that I didn't want to have to think about. Like the wedding that I didn't even want to happen.

Rider looked over the cover page and agreed that it looked very interesting and I would have my work cut out for me. Then, he and my dad began talking about wedding stuff and I looked at the file just so that I wouldn't have to think about it.

The cover sheet did look interesting. So, I flipped through the pages. I got all the way to the fifth page. And that's when I saw it.

The king of hearts is the only king without a mustache.

Now what would that be doing in a CIA file? I bit back a smile. Looks like Joe wanted me back in Italy.