AN: I know, I know… long time between updates which makes me sad and feel bad for all of you who read these things. Well, I'm back. I do have a reason for my non-updateingness…. I blame a research paper that the evil AP English teacher has given us to do and finish and whatnot. I also blame the fact that the past few weeks have been kinda rough.

Anyway, I am here with an update and as soon as this accursed research paper is finished I will be updating regularly once more. Do expect at least two or three stories to be updated this weekend because I have plenty of ideas! And I also have most of next week of school so wait for it!

Thank you all for the amazing response this fic is getting. Really, it makes me smile! I love that some of you thanked me for advice and others said they liked the advice Gilbert gives!

Please review and ask Gil stuff! Mattie gives hugs to reviewers! (I can't believe I type that so much!

It's Gilbert and I'm back with more awesome advice for all. I'm glad you guys liked the last bit of advice I gave because it was awesome in every way. I hope you all continue to send me questions that you need help with.

Please, feel free to read this. It takes up the time when Mattie is at work because I have nothing to do now that I'm not a nation. I will be a nation again though… just you wait. The world will be mine!

Gilbert… stop plotting world domination.

Damn it Mattie! No I WILL NOT!

Prussia-

I'm actually kind of relieved that you did this... Advice thingy... Well, cuz... *sigh* I kind of closed off all emotional ties to the rest of the world... So no BFFs and best friends in my world... Aquaintances?

Anyways, I'm kinda... Stressed... I've been solving everyone else's problems for their own good and thus... Making a lot of problems for myself...

There was this guy that my... Friend told me to get close to because she liked him and wanted to see if he liked her... But then everyone found out that she liked him and she then fell out of love, but I... Kinda like that guy now...

But seriously, I don't get him at all... Eventhough I knew him longer than anyone else (since 3rd grade) he would never look me straight in he eye and whenever any of us are playing truth or dare, and they ask about relationship problems, he would start ranting off in Japanese. But there are some times that were very confusing...

... During a game of... Endball... We were on opposite teams and course, being on opposite teams, we were against each other... And I said that I hated him, cuz it was a fuckin game and he was blocking me from the ball... And then he said... " you shouldn't"

And there is his friend... Seriously, that Mexican looks at me... All of the time... And he and the Japanese would be talking in their own little bubble and that Mexican would look at me, and seriously, it scares he crap out of me. I can never look at that direction.

But the problem is, I've been in a relationship before, and I broke up with the guy, so I'm not that sure about having a relationship anymore... I managed to close myself from all attractions... So what should I do?

Awaiting for awesome advice,

Fullmoon230

~Fullmoon230,

Well, the first thing you could do to fix some of that is too start paying attention to your own problems before worrying about the problems of others. I know that awesome people are just compelled to help the less awesome but, sometimes it's better and more awesome if you just help yourself out first. I know that's not the easiest thing to do but, you're too awesome to ignore yourself.

Guys that aren't me kinda suck don't they? Apparently they cause lots of problems for chicks and that sucks. I'm lucky that Mattie isn't like that.

Well, one thing to do would be to tell the Mexican that you really don't want him to look at you and threaten to kick his ass if it continues. Don't have too much fear about going into another relationship. Some work and some don't so you shouldn't close yourself to everything. Tell the guy how you feel and see where that goes.

~Gilbert

Hallo, Prusse~

Well. I'm returning to mein Vaterland of Berlin, Germany to spend sometime with family over the holidays. Unfortunately, I've been studying in the US and haven't been home since last Christmas, only talking with them through the rare email or phone call.

And I've never been much of a people person, let a lone a family person. And my mother can be quite vicious when she wants to. Approach with peace offerings, yes or no?

Später,

Loreli

Loreli,

Easy question. If you do not talk to family members often, you are still awesome. Especially if you are from Germany, that makes you ridiculously awesome to an extent most can't even imagine being. Well, if your mother is vicious then peace offerings are a yes. It will not make you less awesome.

~Gilbert

Well, Gilbert...

I have three questions:

1) You do know that France keeps making advances on Canada right?

2) what's the meaning of life?

3) How can you come across as confident (I have to play a lead role in a play, but I don't act as well in front of a large audience)

Flying Rainbow Penguin

Flying Rainbow Penguin,

1.) No I did not know that and thanks for telling me. That damn Frenchman is going to get his ass kicked after I warn him one damn time then, if it happens again, I'm gonna kill his dumbass!

2.) The meaning of life is awesome… that's all there is too it.

3.) Well, I am a master at confidence. The first step is to realize that you are more awesome then everyone else. You have to remember that and you should be just fine.

~Gilbert

Dear Gilbert,

Thank you! I asked him out, and it worked! He said yes! But then another problem arose. He asked me if I wanted to go on a date on Saturday, and I said yes. He's coming to pick me up atmy house, but um... where should we go?

Thanks for the awesome help! Edie out.

Edie,

My awesome advice does not fail! That's always a good sign. Well, go somewhere awesome. Movies are awesome. Beaches can be awesome if you aren't amazingly pale. So are parks. As are restaurants sometimes. A movie seems to work pretty well for a first date though.

~Gilbert

Dear Gilbert,

Thanks for the advice! It'll be awesome help, once we actually find the idiot...long story. Ah, here's an odd question. I want to create my own country, but I don't know how to go about it. Any suggestions? Also, how do you feel about a foursome between you, Canada, the Netherlands, and Denmark? (Curiosity compels me to ask.)

Give Canada a hug for me, and let him know he's one of my all-time favorite countries! Even though I'm American and live in one of the stupidest countries (sorry Al, love you but you can be stupid...), I'll always remember him and you even though you're technically not a nation! (Seriously, Prussia should be put back on the map, that'd be awesome!)

~Ayla Pazza

Ayla Pazza,

I hope you find him then….

Anyway, creating a country isn't really that hard. You have to be awesome and find some awesome people to help you out. Then, you build an army to fight off other countries and scare them with your awesome might. That sounds like it would work.

Mattie will get a hug from you! Alfred is stupid… I know because he hates the awesome me and you have to be stupid to hate me.

~Gilbert

Greetings Your Awesomeness!

I've been having some issues and thus thought I would seek the most-awesome advice of the most awesome being in the universe! I've been hanging out with the same group for years and now that we're nearing the end of high school I'm growing apart from them. The reason for this is our different views on work. They're mostly concerned with the future and I feel like they can't see the forest because there are so many trees in the way. Is there a way for us to still get along? I don't want to loose them as friends but I feel it happening, and I will tell you that it is very unawesome.

Oh, and give Mattie a hug and tell him I know how he feels about no one remembering him. My teacher used my name and the kid BEHIND me said, "Who's that?"

-Sadistic Kunoichi-13

Sadistic Kunoichi-13

I'm glad that you truly recognize my awesome. That is always something that makes me happy and makes you awesome. Anyway, you could always tell them how you feel about that. Losing friends sucks and is not awesome and no one ever likes it. Basically, talking to them should work and make sure to tell them that you really don't want to lose the awesome friendship.

Mattie appreciates that quite a bit. He enjoys knowing that people relate to him for some reason. He's not forgotten by everyone though. I could never forget birdie if my life depended on it.

~Gilbert

Hey Gilbert,

Soo, sweete. Glad to find your "advice column". I need an advice regarding my roommate. She's not drinking. Not with me nor with anyone else. Seriously, one time (baah, and only) we wanted to go to a party, soo before I drank two beers and she just, uh, 1/3 of an non-alcoholic one (so I guess I can just forget about vodka). And while at party, she couldn't relax and get in mood. But the band playing was really good. So, how do I get her to drink with me? Or just chill out and actually go out of that damn flat? And make her not to go sleep before 12? C'mon, we're students! We should have some fun, don't we?

By the way, You know, I'm actually in Culmerland, Thorn. And it's full of yours buildings! Shame, the castle is all ruins now. Do you still remember beeing here?

Love,

Cheshire Cat.

Cheshire Cat,

I hate those unawesome people that get all bad when it comes to drinking and shit. I know plenty of people that are like that and they really suck. One good way to get them to have fun and drink would be just find a way to get one drink in them and hope they loosen up because one is normally enough to get that done. Or you could convince her that fun is good for her and get her to have fun.

Find out what kind of music and shit she likes and use that to get her to stay up and hang out.

I really do remember that place, fond memories….

~Gilbert

Hey Herr Awesome!

I'M SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS! Especially since I could you really use some awesome advice from the very eptomime of awesomeness himself. I have this ex-friend who really gets on my nerves-we have completely different views on religion, religious tolerances, sexuality, morals. I didn't want to have to deal with someone so close-minded anymore. A mutual friend chose her over me, and everyone else that I was friends with through her is sick of her contolling attitude

too, and it is way unawesome. They can't get away from her! And two days ago she crossed the line by yelling at a friend while the two of us were messing around. Do you have any advice for us?

Wishing I was feeling as awesome as you

are,

LunaDiscord

P.S. Give Mattie a hug for me!

LunaDiscord,

Well, I am glad that you recognize my awesome… that is a good sign that awesome does not escape you so you have potential to be awesome. Not as awesome as me because the only person that can ever come close is Mattie.

Anyway, that person sounds incredibly unawesome. Unawesome is not a good thing in my book. If said person can't accept that others have different views then they are not worth any time whatsoever because your awesome time should not be wasted on the unawesome. Basically, ignoring those people will get you very far. If not, just tell her that she's unawesome and needs to go away and get over herself because you're all done dealing with her.

Mattie will get hugs from many people apparently… I wonder why no one ever says have sex with Mattie for me…. That is something I can do and would be more than happy to do.

~Gilbert

Heeeeey Gil...

Uh, yeah.

There's this... /thing/ staring up at me into my window. I'm 50% sure it's my neighbor's pet, 50% guessing it might be Belarus in disguise? Might you be willing to lend me some of your weapons or something like that? (Mattie with a hockey stick would be nice too.)

Speaking of which, say hi to him for me. Mattie, I mean.

~Ophiouchos

Ophiouchos,

I think you may need the services of Mattie with a hockey stick. Especially if it is Belarus because she scares even the awesome me at times. She doesn't need to know that and I hope she never reads this because I will deny it and say that Mattie wrote. Yeah… I'll send Mattie over to check that for you.

~Gilbert

Dear Gilbert,

I need to use your 'Awesomeness' to help me get my friend to like me. We've been living together for... a long time. I don't know when, but over that time I've developed... feelings for her. We are very close; she looks up to me like a brother. But every time I hear her say 'Bruder this' and 'Bruder that' it ticks me off to no end! It's just so frustrating! Please, can you help me?

~AnonymousGunslingerChocoholic

P.S. [to FrenchFry] I love your writing. It is very, very good!

AnonymousGunslingerChocoholic,

So… my awesomeness can do things like that you know. You need to assert the fact that you are not her bruder but, rather, that you want to be much more than that. You need to tell her how you feel and hope it goes well from there. That is the best thing to do in those cases is just to say it outright rather than what others do and just let things go as they will. So take it into your own hands and tell her.

~Gilbert

YAY… thanks for that! (Gil gave me a tiny bit of space to say that)

~FrenchFry

Hey you stupid German brother stealer,

I have a problem that I could use plenty of advice on because I've tried to fix it myself and haven't gotten anywhere with it. You see, my brother is dating a perverted, albino, German, idiot that is wrong for him in every way imaginable. I hate him more than anything because he's just going to hurt my twin brother and I would kill him if that happened.

I don't know how to handle the fucking freak. He's so arrogant and sure of himself and wrong for my brother in every way. I'm debating whether I should just hurt him now and be done with it or if I should wait until something happens. I've tried to convince my brother of these facts and he won't listen to me.

I wonder why my brother won't believe me. I'm the hero so I must be right.

Alfred out.

Annoying American Moron,

Stop trying to kill the awesome me… it will never work.

I am not going to give you advice on how to get back at me for dating Mattie… that just won't happen. I have no idea why you think my awesome is so terrible but, it's not cool so get over yourself and leave me the hell alone.

You can't kill me because I'm too awesome. I will not hurt my birdie and I am not just a perverted freak. Me and Mattie are right for each other in every way and I stand by that. Just get over yourself and stop harassing us because it pisses Matthew off. He just wants his brother to accept his choice.

Stop being so damn annoying and full of yourself. You are not a hero.

~Gilbert.

So that's all of the responses for this one. That's all the advice I got for you guys this week. Please feel free to ask again because I don't mind repeat costumers because my advice is just plain awesome.

Expect a letter from… well shit… Romano next time.

~TheAwesomeGil

AN: YAY for another chapter in Gilbo's advice! These chapters are quite long. I hope that I got everyone that reviewed the last chapter… if I didn't get it just review one the next one and let me know.

This is a lot of fun for me to write. I love writing as Gil and this is just fun as hell.

I loved writing the back and forth between America and Gilbert. That was awesome and fun! I love writing fights between them because we all know Gil would win in the end!

Well, review!