Peridot had messed up. She had fucked up.
She was sure of it. Her memory was fuzzy, and that was not a good sign. There was a slight pounding in her head, but nothing painkillers couldn't fix. Once it had subsided, she tried to remember how she'd made it home. The empty box in the trash helped jog her thoughts Peridot looked around for her phone, finding it still in her pocket. There weren't any new messages, but she opened the most recent receipt: Jasper.
Her eyes went wide as she saw the recent string of messages. "Oh, SHIT!"
The last message was her address, but before that, half a dozen photos of herself in naughty positions and various states of undress. She remembered taking those, a couple weeks ago after she'd first met Jasper. Even if nothing came of the two of them, she still thought they might come in handy, somehow. But this was not how she had expected to share them with her new girlfriend. They hadn't even had sex yet! How could she have sent unsolicited nudes? She didn't do this stuff! She'd never sent anyone naked photos of herself in her life. What the hell was wrong with her?!
Peridot: I'm sorry.
She quickly typed out the message and sent it. Peridot sat down at her kitchen table, trying to think. A simple "sorry" wasn't going to be good enough. She'd fucked up. She'd fucked everything up! It was only their second date and already it was over.
Peridot: I shouldn't have sent those.
It wasn't that she regretted sending them. She would have loved for Jasper to see her in the nude. But sending those pictures was really really forward of her, and blasted things off to a relationship level they hadn't reached yet. Not to mention all of her flirting and her lewd comments. Sitting at the table reminded Peridot that she'd seen Jasper in her bra last night. She groaned.
Peridot really liked Jasper. Sure, physical attraction was a factor, but underneath her buff, intimidating, curvaceous, attractive figure, was someone with real feelings and emotions. The fact that she was even going on dates with Peridot showed that she had an interest in maintaining a serious relationship. She wasn't just into banging girls for conquest, despite how she might appear. She was someone who was just looking for love like everybody else. And Peridot had turned the tables right around and made it seem like she was only interested in a sexual relationship with the larger woman. Sure, she couldn't deny that that would be a nice perk once they got to that point, but she'd totally jumped the gun on such a step.
Peridot: I don't just think of you as a sex object.
Peridot: I know there's much more to you than that.
Peridot: I'm sorry I sent those pictures.
She'd really messed up. A few tears pricked at the corners of her eyes. The second date should have been a nice, simple dinner. Instead, she'd used alcohol to cover up her nervousness and sent those photos of herself. Sure, she looked great, but she had been trying to take things slow and get a feel for the relationship and not just run right into it. Good going, inebriated Peridot. Just how drunk had she gotten? Not enough, because she still remembered every detail, and her memories were growing increasingly more clear as she became more awake.
Peridot: I shouldn't have gotten so drunk.
Peridot: Thank you for getting me home.
Peridot: I hope you slept well.
"I hope you slept well?!" Peridot re-read the message she'd just sent. Why the fuck should Jasper care if she gave a shit how she slept? She set down the phone and anxiously went to find some cereal for breakfast. 5 minutes went by with no response. Peridot debated sending another message. Against her better judgement, her fingers hit the keyboard.
Peridot: I don't normally do that sort of thing.
Peridot: You're actually the first person I've ever sent photos like that to.
Peridot: I had a lot of fun last night. I hope you did too.
Jasper was probably just busy, and here she was spamming her phone. Peridot decided to send one last message, and then drop the whole thing. If Jasper didn't respond, she'd know it was over.
Peridot: I'm sorry I fucked things up.
Peridot sighed heavily. Unfortunately, she still had a whole day until she had to be back to work, which she could use to wallow in her shame. Maybe a shower would help clear her head. Help wash away the memories of last night.
As she stepped from the shower several minutes later, her phone on the counter buzzed. Peridot quickly picked up the device, nervously scanning the notifications to see a new text message. She took a deep breath, then set the phone down. She needed to work up the courage to read the latest contact from Jasper. To prepare herself for what might come, and run through a dozen scenarios in her head of what she might have said.
It wasn't until she'd dried and dressed herself that she finally slumped down on her couch to face the inevitable. She squinted down at the two word reply, which didn't seem to acknowledge she'd said.
Jasper: Morning sleepy.
Peridot scrolled back through her messages. They looked like they'd all sent. Jasper hadn't said anything in between. What the hell?
Peridot: Uhh… morning.
Jasper: Did you have fun last night?
Peridot: Did you?
Jasper: Just being with you is fun, so yes.
Okay, so… things weren't over? In fact, Jasper didn't seem to care! She didn't care that she had to drag her drunken ass home and practically force feed her, and that was after she'd made a complete fool of herself at the restaurant. At least she'd remembered that she promised to pay the bill.
Peridot briefly considered asking for Jasper to send some nudes back. She wouldn't really mind having them, and it would make them even. Considering what little she knew of Jasper's relationship, or at least sexual, history, she would probably be game. She imagined what that gorgeous, curvacious body might look like, and heat rose into her cheeks. A buzz in her hands brought her out of the daydream.
Jasper: Did you want me to look at those photos you sent?
Her mouth dropped open in shock. Jasper hadn't even looked at them?! What did that mean? Did Jasper not want to see her naked? Jasper had mentioned she'd had sexual exploits in the past, so it was obviously something she was into, or at least okay with. Did Jasper not think she was attractive? Or at least, not attractive enough?
Peridot: You didn't already?!
The phone sat in her hand, the last message still opened. Maybe she should feel happier about the whole thing. She had sent the photos by mistake, and had had second thoughts the morning after. Sure, she deserved to have Jasper look at them, as a consequence to her actions. But honestly her girlfriend, assuming that's what she still was, was actually showing massive respect by not taking advantage of the readily available photos. Maybe it didn't have anything to do with her appearance.
Jasper: Do you regret sending them?
Peridot: No. Not to you, anyway.
Jasper: I know you didn't mean to send them. I kind of saw one when I went to check for your address, but I didn't mean to.
The conversation lulled. Peridot hadn't been expected to be faced with the choice to allow Jasper to see the pictures or not. She'd expected a compliment, or perhaps a critique, or even something lewd. All the possible scenarios she'd imagined didn't align at all with what was happening. How could Jasper look so intimidating, yet be so nice? It was jarring, no doubt.
Jasper: I'd much rather see it in person.
She stared down at the phone. There was the saucy, flirty woman she'd seen bubble up at the restaurant last night. The one she'd told to behave, only to have herself get out of control. Jasper was being so nice and yet, ever since Peridot had thought of asking for nudes back, all she could thinking of was being fucked senseless by the broad shouldered woman. The thought of her naked, laid out before her, wouldn't leave her head. She should text something back.
Peridot: Maybe you will sometime.
Peridot: For now, feel free to check out the photos and have a taste of what you're missing.
This could work. It was a bit of a bigger step in the relationship that Peridot hadn't counted on, but Jasper didn't seem to mind, and she didn't regret it. Somehow, everything had worked out. Based on their initial meeting in the office, Peridot had assumed that Jasper would be more of a jerk. But she was actually surprisingly sweet. The more Peridot thought about it- how she had chosen both of their date spots so far, demanded that Jasper behave, and then her behavior after reprimanding her date at the restaurant- the more it seemed like she might be the jerk here.
Jasper: Definitely saving these.
But if she really was the jerk, that didn't seem to bother Jasper. Shit, maybe this chick was too good for her. Despite Peridot trying to put on airs and pick a fancy dining place and pretend like she was refined, she'd really blown the whole night. It was within Jasper's right to say goodbye right then and there outside of the restaurant, and leave Peridot to hopefully stumble her way home or possible pass out on a park bench somewhere. She could have potentially been robbed or taken advantage of by someone else, if Jasper had just left her there. She had even gone the extra mile to make sure her hangover would be minimal. Huh. It really was more than Peridot deserved based on her actions thus far. And yet Jasper was still game to continue this girlfriend thing.
Peridot: You know, it'd be only fair if you sent one back.
Since the events of the previous evening hadn't completely ruined everything, Peridot seemed to regain her confidence. So much for learning a lesson about being a jerk. Maybe Jasper liked when she was bossy. She didn't protest, and she had listened so far. Interesting to consider. Such information might come in handy later.
"Oh my stars!" Peridot's last message was bumped from the screen, replaced with a nude and flexing Jasper. She could only gape at the image for a solid minute, until a dollop of drool fell onto her phone screen, bringing her out of the trance.
It was one thing to view Jasper's bosom through the confines of shirt. It was another to have them prominently displayed right in front of her. Jasper certainly was… large. The curves of her breasts and the jut of her hips and the bulge of her muscles was a lot to take in. What Peridot wouldn't give to run her hands all over her.
Jasper: Not what you were expecting?
She must have taken the lack of reply as disapproval. Seriously, how could anyone not like what she was seeing? Tall, beautiful, ripped. She was gorgeous. She was amazing! Peridot struggled to formulate a reply while her brain was elsewhere. Jasper had indicated that many of her relationships were the "hit it and quit it" type. Previously, though Peridot had had the occasional wandering thought, she had succeeded in stemming her desire to become more intimate with her girlfriend. But with pictures of them both out on the table, the temptation to move the relationship into more sexual territory was nearly overwhelming. Peridot wondering if Jasper felt the same way.
Peridot: Definitely not.
Peridot: Definitely much better.
The conversation turned to what their next date might be. In between messages, Peridot scrolled up to look at the photo again more times than she could count. She wondered if Jasper was doing the same. She considered suggesting a movie at her place, as a cover for her real intentions. But she was still concerned about rushing things. Maybe, instead, they might head to one of their places afterward their next date for a more private time with just the two of them.
Peridot decided to let Jasper choose the place this time. Her partner picked a sandwich shop not far from work. Darn. She was kind of hoping that Jasper would suggest the movie idea without any prompting. Regardless, their next date was set. Even if Peridot was a bit disappointed, at least things had turned out better than she'd expected when she'd awoken.
After one last glance at her phone and the picture from Jasper, Peridot decided that she really needed to take care of some personal business.