Justin's POV:
I saw Pattie coming in from the balcony, she had been on the phone and obviously didn't want me to hear her talking. "Did Scooter change his mind? Does he want me to work?" I asked her. "No, no, sweetie, I told you, you need time to recover. But you were right it was Scooter. He has news about Ryan, from the hospital." Her expression darkened and suddenly fear started creeping into my head.
"Is… is he… is he alright?" I stuttered. I'd been avoiding to think about him since I woke up in hospital. Every time he came into my mind I felt sick and wanted to vomit. I'm not sure if it was because of the possibility of him being dead or me blaming myself for the fight we'd had.
"Justin." She said with a familiar tone in her voice and her facial expression matching it. It was the 'Justin I'm sorry and it's going to be okay'-look.
"No, NO! He's DEAD?" I screamed feeling my face getting red and my eyes watering until they couldn't hold it anymore. The tears started flowing out of my eyes tear by tear, drop by drop.
"No, Justin. Love, he's… he's only… God, please Justin come here!" She pulled me close to her and I sobbed onto her shoulder. I felt the warm embrace and it helped me fight the pain and worries in my head.
"Wh-what's with him then?" I asked. "He's not waking up, Justin." I knew it. He was gone. I suddenly felt anger and I pushed myself off her. I felt a sudden surge of energy flow through me and I punched into the wall I was standing beside. But no matter how hard I hit it. I didn't feel better, so I slumped down against the wall and buried my face in my hands.
I felt warm arms around my shoulders and I felt Pattie pull me back into her embrace.
"Shh, Justin. It's gonna be okay." I heard her whisper. I knew it really wasn't going to be alright. Why did this happen to us? I didn't want to face life anymore, but I knew I was going to pull through. On the inside I am a fighter. I knew what she meant. She didn't lie, but the way people express themselves can be misleading sometimes. She meant 'It's gonna be okay.' as in 'Life goes on, there are good and bad moments and this is just another bad moment we have to live through.'
"Ryan would want us to continue." I thought to myself. "Or would he?" Or would he? After all he never had the chance to tell me what he thought. What if he hated me?
I calmed down only a short while after my dramatic outburst of emotions. "Hey mum, can we go visit him?" – "Of course, sweetheart. But not today, you have to rest." I gave her a look, but she didn't change her mind.
So I spent the rest of the day trying to relax and trying to have fun with my mum. I mean she's my mum after all, but it turns out she can gossip on almost everyone on television.