The very large door opens, and we can see the other chariots going by. We'll go last, as district 12 is the very last one. Katniss is paying very close attention to the way the other tributes are dressed. I'm guessing she feels the way I do, she doesn't want to make too much of a first impression, because that basically puts a sign on your back that says, "Take me out first", to the other tributes.
I am having a hard time paying attention to them, however. She looks so much different now, and it's hard to stop staring, but she gets suspicious every now and then, so I turn my head quickly to pretend I'm watching the chariots. I'm not.
Finally, our turn arrives. Our chariot leaves the solitary comfort of the Remake Center, and begins its twenty minute presentation down to the City Circle. Cinna and Portia light our fire just before the horses begin to walk. "It works," he says.
He shouts something else to us, but she doesn't hear. Honestly, I don't either, but by the way his lips were moving, I think he wanted us to be presented as one, to hold hands.
"I think he wants us to hold hands." She shrugs, and indifferently holds out her hand, which I then take in mine. Instantly, I feel a weird sensation in my hand. I can only explain it like, it felt like electricity was going through the blood in my hands. I just shake it off, thinking that it's probably due to the excitement of the night. When we come into view, the crowd goes silent.
I look up at the televised screen, and I notice that we actually look like we are on fire! The budget for the Hunger Games costumes must be extraordinarily high. I am very impressed with the outfit, and I can tell that Katniss is too. Then, the crowd begins to roar with cheers. I hold my head up high, but I can't compete with Katniss on this one. She smiles, and holds her head high, and actually blows kisses to the audience. Then, someone throws a rose up, which she catches with her spare hand, and then blows a kiss back to the general area it came from.
People begin to chant our names, but mine is drowned out, with so many more people chanting her name. I notice the grip on my hand getting tighter, and I realize that even though she is doing incredibly well for the public, inside, she is just as scared as I am. I don't let go of her hand, even when she tries to pull it away. I'm hoping my grasp will give her comfort, so I lie, and say, "No, don't let go of me. Please, I might fall out of this thing."
Actually, I have incredible balance, and more confidence than I let on, but I didn't want to let go. She bought it, and said, "Okay." But then she seems to question something, and looks in Cinna's direction.
Our chariot then comes to a halt, next to the others, surrounding the circle. The anthem of Panem plays, and then President Snow gives his official welcome address. Even I can tell he's speaking more to the citizens of the Capitol. We are less than dirt to him.
After he speaks, the anthem plays yet again, and all chariots begin to form a single file line, and parade back where we came from, ending in the Training Center. I keep waving, but I keep my eyes on the screens, watching the girl on fire.
When we get to the Training Center and the doors close, our stylists are applauding our performance. They extinguish the flames, even though they are synthetic, and then they climb down and motion for us to follow; But first, I tell Katniss, "Thanks for keeping hold of me, I was getting a little shaky there."
She comforts me, by saying, "It didn't show. I'm sure no one noticed."
Of course they didn't, I wasn't really shaking; But it actually does give me comfort that she says that. I decide to give her a boost of confidence back. I tell her, "I'm sure they didn't notice anything but you. You should wear flames more often. They suit you." I smile at her, completely meaning everything I said, and she smiles back. For a minute, I'm thinking, My God, maybe she'll actually take that compliment. Wrong. Her smile turns to a frown as she looks like she is really thinking something over. I can tell by the look in her eyes that she still doesn't trust me. I still don't blame her.
She thinks I'm going to try to win the games. I want to just come clean and tell her that I have no intention of killing her, but Haymitch says that's a very bad idea. She needs to think I'm not on her side. Why? I don't know. But I promised Haymitch I'd listen to him. But I still haven't figured Katniss out; Because even though her smile turned to a frown, and she clearly doesn't trust me, she then stood on her tiptoes and kissed my cheek, before climbing down and flitting off. Why did she do that?
I met up with her again in the elevator. She seems impressed with the elevator, and I am too, but neither of us mention it. Our floor is floor 12, because that's our district.
Meanwhile, Effie won't quit talking about the ceremony. She is obviously very impressed with not only our performance, but our outfits. She keeps showering us with compliments, regardless of whether we are listening or not. I have a little more respect for Effie. While at first I thought she was just another heartless Capitol citizen, I now realize that Effie was raised this way. She was taught from an early age that this was standard- this was okay. It doesn't excuse it, but it's not as bad as what President Snow is doing, and I can tell Effie has a heart. I actually feel kind of sorry for her for her ignorance; she's been fed Capitol bullshit all her life.
My room is more luxurious than the one on the train. It looks relatively the same, same materials and all that, but there are even more buttons on the shower, and even some on the bed. There is a remote next to my bed, that will move the upper part up or down, it will heat it to a certain temperature, just like the water from the train. There are plenty more gadgets in the room, but I am tired and don't feel like exploring everything tonight. I want to go to sleep, but my eyes are only shut for about thirty minutes when Effie taps on the door, announcing dinner. I rub my eyes and head towards the door.
There is a balcony just off of our dining room that overlooks the city, and I am immediately drawn to it. Cinna and Portia join me out there, and point out some buildings for me. Then Katniss and Haymitch arrive, and we all sit down. We're offered wine, and I gladly take some. Wine is a delicacy we don't have much at home, but I've always really enjoyed it. Haymitch, of course, accepts a glass of wine, but at least he is actually sober tonight, and to my surprise, Katniss has a glass herself. Then another, then another one after that. Her cheeks are flushed, and she keeps rubbing her eyes as if her eyes are foggy. I know the feeling, I've been drunk a few times before. I want to tell her to slow down, but I feel it isn't any of my business. Still, when she turns her fourth glass down and switches to water, I am relieved, then I do the same.
Her judgement is still somewhat inhibited when a girl that we both recognize walks into the room. She's an Avox. I've heard of them. They are troublemakers who are caught by the Capitol, have their tongues cut out, and then are forced to be servants. I was hoping she wouldn't say anything, but like I said, her judgement was inhibited. Quite loudly, she told the girl she knew her. Effie was immediately startled and dismissed the possibility, but she became more suspicious the more Katniss went on.
So, I have to intervene at this point. The poor girl is getting scared. I quickly come up with something. "Delly Cartwright!" I say, and snap my fingers. Katniss gives me a puzzled look. This Avox looks absolutely nothing like Delly. Yet, Katniss then picks up on what I am doing, and she plays along.
"Of course, that's who I'm thinking of. It must be the hair." She's not the best liar, but Effie looks like she buys it or just doesn't care because her suspicion seems to have subsided completely. To throw off Cinna and Portia now, I say, "Something about the eyes too." Cinna then says, "Oh, well if that's all it is," then begins to describe why our cake is on fire. Katniss is paying close attention, but cakes being on fire isn't anything I particularly care about.
On the way back to our rooms, Haymitch addresses the two of us. "Tomorrow morning is the first training session. Meet me for breakfast and I'll tell you exactly how I want you to play it. Now go get some sleep while the grown-ups talk."
The two of us act more grown up than you do. I think to myself. Still, I nod and stay silent. When Haymitch is gone, I walk with Katniss down the hall, and bring up the fake Delly Cartwright. She doesn't say anything. Maybe she's afraid I'll say something? Maybe she thinks I don't already know who the girl is? I'd seen her on television after being arrested. Most people did. I wonder if Katniss knew her from somewhere else? I realize she isn't going to say anything, but I don't want to say good night yet. So, I change the subject.
"Have you been to the roof yet?" I ask her. She shakes her head.
"Cinna showed me. You can practically see the whole city. The wind is a little loud, though."
"Can we just go up?" I'm surprised she actually suggested that.
"Sure, come on."
The view is better when being shared with someone you care about. I lead her to the railing at the edge of the roof. She looks straight down at the street, and we are both silent for awhile. Then, I tell her, "I asked Cinna why they let us up here. Weren't they worried that some of the tributes might decide to jump right off over the side?"
She asks me why.
"You can't." I hold my hand out, and show her my hand being shocked by an invisible force field, and tell her it doesn't let you, it throws you back if you try. She says, sarcastically, "Always worrying about our safety."
It's quiet for awhile again, as she seems to still be taking in the view.
"Do you think they're watching us now?" She asks me. I don't think so, but I don't want her to say anything incriminating, just in case, so I just tell her that I don't know and ask to show her the garden, to which she agrees.
In the garden, I look to her. She kneels down by a plant, pretending to be observing it, and I do the same. Then she tells me quietly how she knows the Avox girl. Halfway through the story, she is shivering. I take off my jacket to put it around her shoulders. My father raised me to give up my jacket for a girl, even if I am cold, because it's the proper thing to do. But even if it weren't customary, I'd rather be cold than see her shiver. I'd have given it to her anyway.
She hesitates, and I have to admit, it's a little painful just how much she doesn't trust me. Eventually, though, she accepts the jacket, and goes on. I don't mention that I know who she is either. It doesn't seem important. Then she told me that the Avox girl and the boy she was with, they were leaving, where to, she didn't know. She stopped talking, and I felt a need to fill the silence.
"I'd leave here." I probably said that a little louder than I should have, but I don't care.
"I'd go home right now, but you have to admit, the food is prime." She has a crooked smile, and I know she definitely agrees. I notice that she is shivering again, and then I notice the goosebumps on my bare skin. "It's getting colder, we should go inside," I tell her.
On the way back in, we get close to her room, and I haven't yet asked what I've been wanting to ask for a very, very long time. Finally, I realize my chance may come and go, so I just come right out with it. "Your friend Gale, he's the one who took your sister away at the reaping?"
I was afraid she may think this was too personal a question, and slam the door in my face, but she stops, turns around, and answers me. "Yes. Do you know him?"
I want to tell her I know him because I watch her with him in the Hob, but apparently she doesn't remember seeing me there, so I just go with, "Not really, I hear the other girls talk about him a lot. I thought he was your cousin or something."
By answering this way, I was hoping to get either, "No, he's my friend," (preferably), or "No, he's my boyfriend," but all I got was, "No, we're not related."
I just nod. I don't want to flat out ask, I know that is overstepping a boundary. "Did he come to say goodbye to you?" I ask her. Now she is trying to read me. She is wondering why I am asking these questions about Gale. I try as hard as I can to be vague. She answers, but carefully.
"Yes. So did your father, he brought me cookies."
Ah, so that's where he was before he came to say goodbye to me.
"Really? Well he likes you and your sister. I think sometimes he wishes he had a daughter instead of a house full of boys." She looks to be getting uncomfortable, so I try to fix it.
"He knew your mother when they were kids." She relaxes a bit.
"Oh, yes, she grew up in town." Then she gives me my jacket, and I realize we're at the end of our conversation, and though I loved talking to her, I didn't get any answers I'd hoped to get. I take my jacket and tell her good night. "See you in the morning, then." She told me.
"See you," I said, as I walked down the hall.
I think talking to Katniss did me some good. For the first time in a few days, I slept really well. I was actually the last one down to breakfast the next morning, alongside Haymitch. I quickly filled my plate and sat down. I tell her good morning, and she says it back, but she looks frustrated about something. She looks at Haymitch and Cinna, but says nothing else. After Haymitch has a few helpings, he addresses us. "So, let's get down to business. Training. First off, if you like, I'll coach you separately. Decide now." I don't really know. I want to spend as much time getting to know her as I can before the arena, on the other hand, I need to discuss how to protect her in the arena with Haymitch in private. I'm conflicted, so I'm relieved when she makes the decision, not me.
"Why would you coach us separately?"
"Say, if you had a secret skill you might not want the other to know about." She looks at me, and I say, "Well, I don't have any secret skills."
This is true, I don't. "And I already know what yours is, right?" I ask her. "I mean, I've eaten enough of your squirrels."
She quickly turns her attention to Haymitch. "You can coach us together."
I nod. "All right," Haymitch begins, "So give me some idea of what you can do."
Immediately, I say, "I can't do anything. Unless you count baking bread." No one laughed at that joke. "Sorry, I don't."
Haymitch tells me before looking back to Katniss. "I already know you're handy with a knife."
She replies, "Not really, but I can hunt. With a bow and arrow."
"And you're good?" He asks her.
"I'm all right." Alright? There's no way she thinks she is just alright. I will fix this.
"She's excellent," I tell him. She doesn't seem to want my help, but too bad. "My father buys her squirrels. He always comments on how the arrows never pierce the body. She hits every one in the eye. It's the same with the rabbits she sells the butcher. She can even bring down deer."
She looks surprised at first, then, that "I don't trust you" look grazes her face. "What are you doing?" She asks me.
I decide to give her the same look back. "What are you doing? If he's going to help you, he has to know what you're capable of. Don't underrate yourself."
My comment got under her skin. Uh oh. Here we go. "What about you? I've seen you in the market, you can lift hundred pound bags of flour," she snaps. I kind of like it. I have no clue why.
"Tell him that. That's not nothing."
I decide to keep playing this game. It's fun, so I reply, "Yes, and I'm sure the arena will be full of bags of flour for me to chuck at people. It's not like being able to use a weapon. You know it isn't."
I stare her directly in the eyes. She is determined not to lose though, she tells Haymitch, "He can wrestle. He came in second at our school competition last year, only after his brother."
"What use is that? How many times have you seen someone wrestle someone to death?"
Haymitch tuned out a long time ago.
"There's always hand to hand combat. All you need is to come up with a knife, and you'll at least stand a chance. If I get jumped, I'm dead!" I won't let you get jumped.
"But you won't, you'll be up in some tree eating raw squirrels and picking off people with arrows. You know what my mother said to me when she came to say bye? As if to cheer me up, she says maybe District 12 will have a winner. Then I realized, she didn't mean me, she meant you!"
Katniss finally doesn't have a comeback, so she just repeats what I said. "Oh, I'm sure she meant you."
"She said, 'she's a survivor, that one.' She is."
Okay, so she didn't actually say that, but it's true. And then the unexpected happens. She brings up that day five years ago, the day I tossed her the bread.
"But only because someone helped me." And again, I see the same grateful look in her eyes, and I fall silent. She wins. I tell her that she'll have plenty of sponsors to help her, then look at Haymitch and roll my eyes. "She has no idea, the affect she can have," I tell him.
Haymitch smiles at me. I do not look back at Katniss. I want her to figure out exactly what I mean by that. But I don't think she does, because she starts talking about snares.
Haymitch tells me that I really shouldn't underrate my strength, it's helpful. Haymitch tells us to brush up on skills we don't already have in the arena, particularly, survival skills. He also says we aren't to leave each other's side. Then we are told to meet Effie at the elevator at ten, to begin our training.
Katniss is pissed. I don't know what's gotten into her. Maybe she's upset that I didn't let her underrate herself? I don't know. But when she gets to her room she slams her door, Haymitch jumps.
"Are you sure you could handle that?" I smile.
"If given the opportunity, yeah." Haymitch shakes his head and pulls out a flask.
"That's why I'm married to this here liquor." He tells me, tipping the flask up to get every last drop. I laugh.
We do as instructed and meet at the elevator at ten. We are dressed alike, and we see that we are the only ones dressed that way when we enter the training center. We are given a brief introduction. The training coordinator shows us each station, and what we can learn from it. When we are released, I nudge Katniss. "Where would you like to start?"
"Suppose we tie some knots."