Salvage

"Oh god what have I done?" Geoff said under his breath.

"Geoff," Tosh said sharply.

Geoff stood rubbing his forehead trying to piece together the past few moments.

"Geoff explain," Tosh demanded trying to keep her voice calm, forcibly manhandling him into the kitchen "You said mental collapse; what do you mean?"

"I can't because I don't know myself," he snapped back as he now pulled her to the far side of the kitchen.

"Well you had better," she warned him.

"There's deep trauma here for Jack. It happened when I asked him to tell Ianto who he was," he replied his voice shaking along with his hands.

Tosh glared at him. "I figured that out for myself," she spat out." Ianto needs Jack; he's the only person who can reach him. How long before Jack comes out of this?" Her eyes flicked to where Jack lay crumpled next to Ianto.

Geoff shook his head. "An hour? A day? Days? Months? Never?"

Her eyes widened as the implications became clear. "I'm calling Owen," she said, flipping open her mobile.

"What can he do?"

"We're Torchwood!" she retorted as she scowled at him.

"We have to get him here, must I remind….oh of course" Geoff retorted and then slapped himself on the side of his head as he realised Owen could be here within minutes.

Tosh pressed speed dial then handed the phone to Geoff, then going to sit down next to Ianto, and wrapped her arms around him.

"I think we should place him into the recovery position," Owen indicated as he checked Jack's vitals.

"Where's the 'you-know-what' parked?" Tosh asked, her arms around Ianto as he leaned into her sniffing and his bottom lip wobbling.

"Doctor's scarpered. He just dropped me off. He's on standby if needed."

"Owen, I've hurt Jack haven't I," Ianto said, distraught, speaking for the first time since Jack had fallen towards him.

"No you haven't Ianto; Jack's just had a bad day. Things have gotten on top of him and he's so tired he's fallen asleep."

"I need Jack to wake up, to tell me if this is real," he said.

"We know Ianto; we're trying to get him back for you." He pulled out a tourniquet and a butterfly cannula, and raising a vein he inserted it with skill into the back of Jack's hand. "I prepared this in the TARDIS. It's a combination of drugs one of which I've been working on to assist the brain though different levels of consciousness. We trialed it during the Maddock House incident with the phones, remember?"

"If I remember rightly Owen, it didn't work. It was only the removal of the alien from the phone network that caused people to come out of the trance they were in," she pointed out

"I know but I've made some adjustments and I've added a stimulant… a powerful one, in fact the most powerful one we have."

"Powerful, how powerful?" Tosh asked.

"Remember that Judoon that fell through the Rift?"

"Owen! It's too strong," Tosh looked at him as if he had gone mad.

"What the worst that can happen? Jack carks it, right?"

"Owen...time and place," she hissed through her teeth inclining her head towards Ianto. "I can think of far worse scenario's that that!"

"Look I'm sick of this argument…"he stopped and took a breath as if to catch himself. "Hopefully this will work," he paused as if he wanted to say more but just pointed the syringe upwards." I'm not completely stupid. I've checked over the formula with Martha Jones, and the Doctor has added a compound so hopefully this will work." He pulled off the needle cap with his teeth and injected the smoky liquid slowly into Jack's vein.

"And if it doesn't?" she queried raising her eyebrows.

"Then we move to plan 'B'. A scenario that will require the removal of certain persons to the 'you-know-what', and all manner of ructions I don't want to even begin contemplating because trust me I know from bitter experience we don't want ever want to enact plan B." Owen said exhaustion slurring his voice as he felt for Jack's pulse. He let out a sigh and pursed his lips as he concentrated.

A few agonising moments passed and Jack's eyes fluttered open.

"Welcome back," Owen said. Ianto burst into tears and he threw himself at Jack and wrapped himself around him.

Flipping his phone open he pressed speed dial and spoke two words, "It worked." Then snapped it shut.

Standing, Owen pulled Geoff to the far end of the kitchen where he was joined by Tosh.

"What the fuck did you do?"

"I'll tell you what I did, Doctor Harper: I fucked up," Geoff replied honestly. Owen took a breath and took a step back and saw the haunted look on Geoff's face. "This fiasco is entirely down to me. There is deep psychological trauma which can only be described as a mine field for both men here and I walked them right into it. If you want me to be even more blunt I can be but I assure you once this is over I'm going to give myself the biggest kicking of my life because I pushed two very emotionally fragile people over the edge. God knows what damage I have done." Tosh placed her hand on his arm and could feel he was shaking. "I don't need to spell out the possible consequences but I suspect I have put Jack's progress back weeks; god knows how he is ever going to trust me again. And Ianto..." he paused as Tosh and Owen exchanged glances.

"You made a mistake," Owen interjected, his own anger dissipating as he listened to the man berate himself.

"Well, you didn't almost destroy two people," he snapped back

"Where do we go from here?" Tosh said sadly.

"Right now I am going to walk back in there and give Jack all and any support I can, but before then I just need a moment. If you would please excuse me," Geoff pushed passed them and went and stood watching the drama being played out in the lounge, his head bowed, hands to his face.

"There was no plan B was there?" Tosh asked quietly as she filled up the kettle with water.

"We pulled out all the stops here Tosh."

She looked at him curiously then she turned and picked up the kettle and began to fill it. "This wasn't just some formula was it?"

Owen shook his head. "Let's just say it was a group effort between me, Martha Jones, and the Doctor."

"And if it hadn't worked?" she asked pulling out fresh mugs.

"I don't want to go there Tosh. What I could do with is a coffee because I'm bloody knackered," he stretched.

"Long day?"

"Long months," he said quietly under his breath.

She handed him a mug and raised an eyebrow. "A month!" she said mishearing him.

"As I said Tosh we pulled out all the stops."

Standing back, Tosh, Geoff and Owen watched as Jack comforted Ianto. It was touch and go. He oscillated between guilt and the loss of Jack. It became clear Ianto believed that this comfort was something he had created in his mind because he wanted Jack so much.

After some persuasion that this was real, that he was a good man and using a combination of cuddles, kisses, and constant reassurance he calmed down enough to accept Myfanwy. This was a major step because Jack knew once Ianto allowed himself the comfort of her he had taken a first step back on the path to equilibrium.

Finally Jack was able to get him to take some maple syrup, the ultimate reward for good behaviour. Jack felt the band across his chest ease as he slowly encouraged him to take sips of the hot chocolate, now reheated. This was followed with porridge laced with syrup which Jack gently fed him a spoon full at a time.

As things calmed down, Jack promised him that he had been so good that tomorrow he could eat pancakes and maple syrup all day if he wanted. He was heartened that the corners of Ianto's mouth twitched.

"The drug you used; how long can I use it for?" Jack asked Owen bluntly as he lifted the mug to encourage Ianto take another sip of hot chocolate.

"I won't recommend using it for more than an emergency; a one off like we just did," Owen told him equally bluntly.

"The next few days are going to be critical. Ianto will have good moments and not so good moments. I need to be able to function and to do that I must be awake."

"I think that's doable," Owen admitted.

"How much energy will it return?" Jack asked him.

"About as much as now. You won't sleep as much but your ability to move around will be restricted. How long will you need?" Owen asked, pulling out a pen as Tosh handed him a pad of paper and started to work out some calculations.

"What Ianto needs is for me spend time with him on my own, just the two of us, so he can reconnect with me and see this as real. Right now I am not convinced he does, so I need to help him work through his emotions. It means I have to be able to get up and direct him."

"I can boost the dosage," Owen advised as he scribbled furiously then looked up "Three days," Owen replied, "you can use this three day max but there will be a price."

"There's always a price," Jack said grimly as he tried to stand but found it was impossible. Before he attempted to stand again Owen and Geoff pulled him up.

"Tomorrow, Ianto is allowed as much maple syrup as he wants. However try and encourage him to eat the syrup with something, but there are no restrictions." He now handed the mug to Tosh "Ben can deliver if you run out. Morag's number is on the wall," he added as Owen stood aside and Ianto now stood and put his arm around Jack.

"There is a security system built into this house which means it can be put it into complete lockdown. For peace of mind, I suggest we do that. Tosh, you will find the codes in a small blue book in my top right hand desk draw."

With slow deliberate steps they made their way upstairs.

Still dazed Ianto felt himself being undressed. Jack took him for a piss, but he felt so uncoordinated Jack had to help, to make sure he hit the pan. He felt embarrassed because he didn't want to have an accident and make a big mess but felt useless that he couldn't do this for himself. Jack pulled back the covers and Ianto got into bed. As he did he tucked the duvet around him then drew the curtains and turned off the main light, leaving on the bed side lights, filling the room with a soft glow.

As he slid next to him Ianto broke down again. Jack held him speaking in soothing tones as he stroked his face.

"How do I know this is real?" Ianto asked him still trembling. "Because I saw the blue box."

He took Ianto's hand and kissed the palm. "Feel me Ianto, I'm here." He put Ianto's hand on his face, then his chest.

"I'm scared I made this all up, I made a big fuss and got everyone scared and hurt you, but then I'm scared that the box really did come and took you away and this is all a dream because I need you so bad," he sniffed

Jack cupped his hands around Ianto's face. "What you saw was real. The blue box came but I didn't go in it. See I am right here," he reassured him but his words had no effect

Ianto clung onto him desperately, crying intermittently. He decided to take a new tactic.

"Look at me," he stated but Ianto just buried his face deeper into Jack's shoulder so he placed his hand under his chin.

"Look at me," he repeated more strongly and pulled his face up, all red and snotty from crying. Reaching out Jack pulled out some tissues and cleaned up his face. "You've had a tough day; you saw the blue box and thought I had run away from you. You got so scared you wanted to throw yourself off the cliff. You then had a mess of feelings that were very hard to understand," he reflected as Ianto scanned his face. "Then you felt disconnected like it was all a dream; like something you made up because you love me so much you don't want to live with the idea I might be gone. Something happened to me and Owen turned up then I woke up. Then we had a big cuddle, you had something to eat, and now we are in bed." He saw Ianto nod.

"I think you've had enough to deal with today. I want you to focus on me." He stroked Ianto's face. "This is my hand touching your face." He traced his thumb over his lips then kissed him. Then with tenderness he mapped out Ianto's body. After a while Ianto began to do the same with Jack. "Just you and me, here and now. Focus on that, we are in our bedroom, in our bed. I am touching you and you, me. I am real; I am here." He saw tears track down Ianto's face and kissed them away.

"I got so scared," he shuddered.

"I know you did Ianto, but no more scared now. We are here, this is me," he continued speaking softly gently caressing him.

Ianto took a deep sniff. "It is you. You have your smell, so this must be real because in my dreams there is no smell."

Almost choking with relief Jack just kept repeating his words as he pulled him into a massive hug. "I love you Ianto, there will always be a you and me," Jack told him gently as Ianto now settled on his chest to listen to his heartbeat. Stroking his hair and his face he noted when Ianto drifted into sleep. As he did Jack now broke down in too deep sobs and held him as close as he could.