Author's Note: So, so, tired… 2 midterms and 1 assignment this week, haven't slept more than 5 hours for this whole week… just got back from class. Uploading this chapter then sleep.
Excuse any typos. Edited through only once
6 more reviews to 600 reviews! Woot!
Here's more news: I'm going to China on August 12th… and last time I went back to China the story was put on Hiatus for about a year and a bit… hopefully that won't happen again… n.n;
)BiskElle( - Well, it's not really the lack of reviews that's making me scratching my head but just I keep getting messages of favs or watches and views yet no reviews… so… meh. Yupp that's kind of how I imagined it to be… even though we understand Eriol would choose Tomoyo, for Syaoran, Eri's suppose to be his one and only true friend…
)Vivace( - Actuuuaallyy, more of Love this chapter! ;) And thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it—it was nice to write… I like writing conclusive, bittersweet endings.
)HappyHam( - Ummm nope, Ilonka wasn't meant to live (oops)… Well, I guess try to see it from the King's point of view? His best friend from birth was basically taken away from him by a girl.
)theladytsubasax( - if you'd like me to send you an email for the update please leave me your EMAIL!
)Ree-Vance( - Yupp a lot of problems to work out… which will all be worked out in… the SEQUEL! n.n; just no way to fit everything in one story D:
Please take your time to review – thanks!
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Chapter Thirty-Two
Compromise
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Weeks passed since the conclusion to the Fai Ilonka trial. Her story was briefly jotted down on parchment and stored on a dusty shelf somewhere; her life story closed the same way her mother's life was concluded.
For a while, all was quiet and calm around the castle. For those who knew Ilonka, they mourned her death; for those who didn't, they continued with their lives.
On a particularly bright and warm morning, the King woke with the sun shining on his face. As he got up, he stared outside at the blue sky, and green landscape. Perhaps it was because the weather was just so kind, and probably because enough time has passed for the weight of Ilonka's death to lift from his heart. But whatever the reason, he suddenly felt like the dark cloud over the past few days had parted, and he no longer wanted to grieve. As much as mourning for Ilonka was needed, it's time to move on. And he wanted to see Sakura. He wanted things between them to be okay. He wanted things between them to be as they were before this tragic incident.
The thought of seeing her again after so long woke him up completely, as he ran a hand through his thick and messy hair. He called for his maids as they came in to groom him.
"Good morning, your Majesty." They greeted politely. "What would you like for breakfast today?"
"Breakfast? Who has time for that? Quickly, make me presentable, and I shall be on my way to see my Lady Sakura."
The maids giggled amongst themselves. Finally, it appeared things were looking up, and the dark days had passed.
—
Half an hour later found King Syaoran in front of Sakura's door. Eagerly, he knocked, and he knocked.
But nobody answered.
Curious, as well as impatient, he opened the door and entered.
Being greeted by an empty room lowered his good mood, but he decided he wasn't going to leave until he saw her. "It's been more than a month since we last saw each other… a few more minutes won't matter." And so he closed the door behind him, and tried to make himself comfortable on her bed.
But minutes turned into hours, and still there was no sight of Sakura. Little did the King know, the death of Ilonka had taken such a toll on the girls they've recently been living together in Tomoyo's dorm, comforting one another, with scattered visits from Eriol and Arwin during the day time.
With the state of depression Tomoyo is in, Eriol hadn't had the heart to break the news of what the King had said to him, to her. He simply couldn't have her in a worse state than she already was. More than that, seeing as she stayed after all these weeks, he had secretly hoped that perhaps what the King said was out of anger in that moment, and that he has forgotten all about it. In that case, why worry his lady?
"I wonder where she went…" the King muttered, yawning. The warm sunlight was making him sleepy. "I wonder where her roommate went too…" he considered searching the castle for her, but that would be like trying to find a needle in a haystack. He then considered sending all his guards out throughout the castle to find her, but this was something personal and he wanted to keep it that way. And so he decided to continue waiting, however long it would take.
His stomach growled. "What to do…" he muttered, looking around the room for any source of entertainment.
And that's when he noticed that all too familiar booklet on Sakura's bed stand. Grudgingly, he reached over and picked it up. "Hmm." He pondered looking at the film of dust that covered it. "She must not have read this book in a long time… Which is odd, considering how much she loved it." But Syaoran didn't think too hard on it, as he flipped through the pages. "Now where did I leave off…" and so he began to read. He read about Lilia returning to the King, he read about Lilia having a fight with her husband, and he read about Lilia sleeping with King Reyn in a night of drunken desire. Somehow, something inside him felt uncomfortable. Like… déjà vu. But he's never read anything like this before… right? So he dismissed the thought, and continued to read.
When King Reyn awoke the next morning, he found Lilia still deep in sleep next to him. The sight of her and memories of the night previous brought a loving smile to his lips. He laid by her side, stroked her hair gently, thanking the Gods to have given him another chance—and this time he was going to keep her no matter what it took.
All morning, Lilia slept. Some time around noon she stirred just the slightest and mumbled something about a headache, before drifting back sleep. The small motion made King Reyn chuckle. But he stayed on the bed next to her, his weight supported by his elbow, while his free hand continued stroking her silky hair.
However, when she still didn't wake up by the afternoon, the King began to feel slightly concerned. He did not wish to wake her for he knew she must be so very tired, but at the same time he did not wish to linger at this place any longer—he would be able to take care of her much better if they were somewhere better equipped.
Calling the brothers Marcus and Miles to him, he ordered for them to prepare the carriage for travelling, and to bring some food and water for the trip.
With the utmost care, King Reyn wrapped Lilia in warm blankets and scooped her up into his arms, carrying her to the carriage. As Miles helped him settle in more comfortably in the carriage, King Reyn kept his eyes on Lilia the entire time. Miles suggested to lay Lilia down in the seats across from the King, but he refused, and continued holding her in his arms, as if afraid to let go. "Travel slowly—I do not wish for anything to disturb my Lilia's sleep."
They travelled through the night, and only arrived at the castle by early dawn of the following morning. Gently, King Reyn personally settled Queen Lilia into their grand bed, pulling the covers up to her chin. As much as he wanted to stay and lie next to her, he had been gone from the castle for a while had matters to attend to. Giving her a quick kiss on her forehead, he left the room.
—
Queen Lilia woke just before noon. She yawned, stretched, and wondered why she felt like she's been sleeping for days. And why she had such a splitting headache. And why she couldn't seem to remember anything. And most of all, why was the bed so comfortable? "Where am I…?" She mumbled, rubbing at her eyes as she sat up in bed. Looks… familiar. She thought, absent-mindedly. Very familiar…
"Your Majesty!" A young girl rushed in and curtseyed quickly. "You're awake! Please tell me what I can do for you to make you more comfortable? Would you like a bath? To be dressed? To have brunch? Please, your wishes are our command!"
"Oh dear… why are there servants here…" And Lilia's eyes snapped open as she sat up abruptly. "Oh!" A gasp left her lips. There's only one place in the world that she would be referred to as 'Your Majesty'. "I-I'm… I'm in King Reyn's castle!"
"Y-Yes…" the maid replied uncertainly, confused by Lilia's reaction. "A-And you're His Grace's Queen…"
Lilia touched her hand to her forehead. How did this happen? She questioned in wonderment. How could I have ended up here? Did I travel all this way? Yet, I have no recollection of anything… except… except…
Something flashed in her mind. Jayx. A slap. Tears. Slut. Her head was starting to hurt. Lilia pulled at her hair as the memories slowly flooded back. "Oh God… Jayx… he hates me…" she whispered.
"Y-Your Majesty? You look pained… please, let me do something to help you!"
Lilia looked up and forced a smile; she did not wish for this poor girl to worry. "Well, I am feeling rather famished, please bring me something to eat and drink, my dear… dear…?"
"Lamian Gillian, Your Majesty."
"Thank you, Gillian."
"No thanks are ever need, my Queen." The young girl bowed happily at how polite and considerate Lilia was, and left the room.
Brunch was delicious. But Lilia could not fully enjoy the food as her mind was elsewhere. She wondered what she should do now. Perhaps she ended up here because her body came here on instinct for it knew this was home? That Reyn is her one true love? Or perhaps she was just escaping from her responsibilities and knew Reyn would comfort her. But sadly she didn't know which it was.
After the warm meal the King has yet to return, and so Lilia requested for a bath. As she indulged herself in the rose scent and soothing hot water, she let herself go and cleared her mind of all the problems she didn't want to think about.
Lilia didn't know how much time had passed, but by the time she got out of the tub, pulled on a clean, silk night gown, and re-entered the bedroom, she was engulfed within the King's embrace. "Lilia." He breathed against her neck, inhaling her scent.
And Lilia felt a warmth surging from her heart to each of her nerves, tingling her body. "R-Reyn…" she muttered, hugging him tightly in return.
"How are you feeling?" he asked tenderly as he pulled back just enough to allow his hand to brush her cheek delicately.
"Much better now." She replied with a smile. "You're always here for me, Reyn… always…"
"Of course, my love… and I always will be…"
"I can just imagine your expression though…" she giggled.
"My expression?"
"Of course! What a surprise it must have been for you when I simply showed up at the castle in Goodness knows what condition—I mean I must have been in pretty bad shape for me to not even remember travelling all this way!"
Something clicked in King Reyn's mind. But he didn't want to believe it. "When you… travelled here?"
"Well, yes… the last thing I remember was… well, something to do with Jayx… and the next thing I knew was waking up here. Maybe my heart just knew this was home, and took my body here…" she replied gently, an oblivious smile on her face.
"Oh my God…" King Reyn muttered in disbelief.
"What's wrong?" Lilia asked with worry.
And as Reyn stared into her innocent eyes, he knew she was not lying and in fact did not remember anything. And it broke his heart horribly. But he didn't have the heart to tell her, perhaps afraid she would regret it, and hate herself for what happened. I convinced her once to be with me, I can do it again, this time with her sober. He thought to himself. We have time now; there is no need to burden her with this knowledge. And so, with a smile, he replied. "Nothing, sweetheart, nothing at all. I'm just wondering how difficult a trip it must've been to walk so far." He led her to their bed, where they sat down. "Tell me Lilia, tell me what happened to you that caused you to… escape here—not that I mind, of course."
Lilia looked down, and wondered what Reyn would think if he knew all the dirty things Jayx had called her. The thought of it made her nervous, and she began to fidget. But Reyn laid his large hand above hers, as he caught her eyes and poured warmth and trust into them. Staring into those eyes, Lilia felt her nerves calming, as she turned her hand, so that she could intertwine his fingers with hers. "It's… Jayx."
"Yes…?"
"Jayx and I… had… a fight…"
Reyn could feel his pulse quickening from joy, but tried to keep it from showing. "I'm so sorry…"
"He… accused me of things… then he called me… very hurtful names… and locked me out of the house, and said he never wanted to see me again." She finished softly.
Asshole. Reyn thought angrily. What an unappreciative bastard. Does he know just exactly what he's giving up? He was mad at her? He should feel blessed she even looks at him! But he kept all his emotions deep within. "What did you guys fight about, if I may ask?"
Lilia was silent for a bit, before her grip on Reyn's hand tightened slightly. "We fought about… us…"
"And what happened between you two?"
"No, not Jayx and I us… you and I, Reyn…"
Reyn's eyes widened slightly. "How would he even know about us?" But deep inside he had a little smirk of pride.
"I…I don't know… I-I told him, each time I came to visit you, that I was visiting friends and family… but somehow, he found out. I don't know how he did as our conversation didn't last very long. But all these years, he knew I was visiting you. And all those years he questioned me over and over again, hoping I would be honest with him…" A strand of hair fell down, covering a part of Lilia's face, but she didn't brush it back for she was so ashamed of herself. "But I never was… and he had the last straw… he asked me one last time who I was visiting, and when I replied 'Friends', he was just… so angry. He thought we did unspeakable things, and that I was cheating on him with you for your wealth! It was absurd, but he knew what he knew, and would not let me explain myself. We fought, he yelled, and eventually shut the door in my face… and… that's the last thing I remember."
King Reyn tilted her chin upwards. "Do you miss him?"
Lilia looked so confused. "I-I don't know… H-He's my husband…"
"I'm your husband also. Now look at me, and tell me. Right now, in this moment, who do you want to be with?"
And as Lilia stared into those warm eyes, a single perfect tear of happiness slid down the side of her face. "You, of course Reyn… for the last few years now, it's always been you, I just couldn't admit it because I couldn't abandon Jayx! But each time I saw you, it was so difficult to leave you. It made me wish I was less responsible and more selfish so that I could just stay here with you like I wanted, and not worry about Jayx."
Reyn smiled. "And I want to be with you. You. It's always been you. And it will always be you. Only you."
"Reyn…"
And King Reyn kissed her on the lips, tasting her tears in the kiss. He has waited far too long to hear those words from her, but it's all been worth it. As he ran his hand through her hair, and felt her submitting guiltlessly and absolutely to his touch and kiss, he swore he would never let her go, never mistreat her like that idiot Jayx dared to do. This was the woman he loved above all else; for this life and any that would follow.
When they broke apart, they were both panting slightly. Lilia studied his features carefully as she brought her hand up to touch his eyes, his nose, and finally they lingered on his lips. Without breaking eye contact, he kissed them lightly. "Reyn… I… I don't want you to think I'm only here because things aren't working between Jayx and I. Truthfully I—"
"Shhh… I know, my love. You're an honourable woman and I know you would never do that."
"I'm touched by your trust in me… but please, let me finish." She took a deep breath. "My sole reason for leaving was because of that misunderstanding we had… and back then when I thought you pitied me, I felt like such a fool for falling in love with a man who felt nothing for me, I couldn't face you without feeling humiliated. And I never believed you when you denied it, because I was so afraid of making myself believe you love me… for deep inside I've always loved you, and if I give myself—heart and soul—completely to you, I would be vulnerable… I was so afraid of it that it was always just easier to believe you never loved me, and that we would never work out. But after all these years, I could deny it no longer. What's between Jayx and I was a fleeting moment of passion and lust. I needed him for I was so hurt by you, while he just needed a woman in his life—not even a woman, just a person. But it's always been you in my heart…"
"I know, Lilia… I know… we tortured ourselves enough with that one misunderstanding… but after this long trip we're at where we're suppose to be—with each other."
"I love you, my Reyn…" Lilia said, pouring all her feelings into that sentence. She fell into his embrace and buried herself in his arms, inhaling his scent. She's wanted to do this since she visited him the first time, all those years ago. But guilt always weighed her down—but no more. She felt so relieved to finally being able to be completely honest with herself.
"And you know I love you more than the sun, the earth, and the stars…" Reyn replied, stroking her back. "I love you so, so much…"
—
For a while it seemed all was right with the world. The entire castle seemed to have felt the love their King and Queen had for one another, and in turn the place seemed brighter, the people chirpier.
King Reyn and Queen Lilia were deeply in love, as if all those years of suffering had never happened. And being back on her throne, alongside her King wasn't something Lilia had to readjust to—in fact, it made her feel like she was finally back where she belonged.
Each morning neither wanted to get up from bed, and at every official meeting they could barely drag their attention away from one another to the matter at hand. They would steal glances and smiles at one another, and while most Lords smiled at their love, some were noticeably irritated but could say nothing.
And everything was simply perfect.
But like all things in this world, nothing is meant to last forever.
It began with Lilia's health.
A few weeks after living with Reyn, Lilia began to throw up occasionally in the morning. And it seemed she was beginning to develop an allergy to certain types of food. A taste of certain things would make her stomach queasy; sometimes just catching a waft of the wrong scent would send her running to the lady's room.
The cooks checked and checked the ingredients, but insisted the food was of top quality.
Reyn sent in doctors for her once, after which the doctor explained something rather hastily to him and left. But Reyn assured her that everything was okay… but perhaps she should stay in bed more and try to move around less.
Reyn, of course, knew what happened. This was the result of that one night of passion they had, which she had no memories of. He was ecstatic by the fact they were going to have a baby together, but was concerned how he was going to break the news to her without her reacting badly. So he pondered daily on the best way to tell her of their night together, while just telling her to relax, stay in bed, and not worry.
Lilia on the hand, began to grow more and more anxious as the days went by. Why did Reyn constantly tell her everything is okay, and that she didn't need to see a doctor again? Why did it feel like everyone around the castle was giving her strange glances, as if they knew something she did not? After long nights of thinking, Lilia wondered if she was dying. She wondered if Reyn didn't have the heart to break the news to her, and so simply told her to live her days comfortably, while keeping the servants quiet about the news.
As more days went by, Lilia became more and more certain of her theory. The servants were taking extra good care of her, and Reyn was so gentle and sweet to her it was almost becoming unbearable. And every time she asked him about her sickness, he would become tense, mutter something incoherent, and find an excuse to leave. It didn't help she was beginning to feel swollen, and her vomiting seemed to get steadily worse, especially in the mornings.
Convinced her days on earth was numbered, Lilia became depressed, and began to think over life, if there was anything she regretted doing, and if there was anything she wanted to do before she passed away.
And she realized there was one thing she did that perhaps she had done out of impulse, without fully considering the consequences.
While she never lied about her feelings towards Reyn, she started to feel as though she acted too quickly on them. True, her and Jayx had a huge fight. But it was still just a fight. Neither mentioned officially that things were over between them, and it made Lilia feel unsettled. And if this issue is never resolved, she fears that the relationship between her and Reyn will face its problems in the future because of it.
In addition to Jayx, Lilia began to wonder about that girl she met many years ago; Mirandin.
From her memories Mirandin was a sweet, righteous young woman who loved the King with all her heart. She is at the perfect age for bearing children for the King, and would probably make a wonderful Queen loved by all the people. Briefly Lilia wondered if Mirandin was still trapped in this castle, foolishly waiting for the King's love.
And so, Lilia tried to subtly bring the topic of Jayx and Mirandin into her conversation with Reyn. But as expected, if the conversation ever so much as begin to drift in the direction of Jayx, the King would conveniently either avoid the conversation altogether, or change topic. While Lilia can understand Reyn's avoidance when it came to Jayx, it was still frustrating. When she tried bringing up Mirandin, he seemed to have no recollection of her at all, and would instead brush the topic off absent-mindedly.
As the days went by, the frustration and guilt only built up inside Lilia, until she began to hate herself and could barely have the dignity to get out of bed each day. Meanwhile King Reyn was so desperate to hold onto what they had he was afraid of admitting the downhill turn their life had taken. So he pretended nothing happened and only continued to show love to his Queen, while still avoiding the sensitive topics she so wanted to talk to him about.
But enough is enough. Lilia was running out of patience, and most of all, time. One night when King Reyn had to attend a meeting, Lilia thought over everything, and made a decision on her own.
Under the belief her days on earth was numbered, all Lilia wants now is redemption. She didn't want to leave the world without settling things with Jayx, and there was no point to marrying Reyn if within a few months he would have to look for a new wife. It's time to stop being selfish and do what she wants to, and instead, do the responsible, mature thing…
King Reyn finished the meeting late at night. He walked quickly back to his Grand bedroom as he knew his Queen always waited for him to come to bed each night before lying down in his arms and fall asleep. Up to the point his hand touched the door handle to the room, the smile on his face remained intact. But as he pushed open the door, he realized the room was pitch black, and it began to worry him.
"Lilia?" He called out softly as he stepped forward. Just as he nearly reached the bed, a candle was lit, and it brightened Lilia's solemn expression. "Lilia?" The King asked once more, this time more carefully as his steps slowed down.
"Reyn…" she responded. "For many a nights now I wanted to speak to you about what I'm feeling. I understand Jayx is a sensitive topic. But it is also a topic I needed someone to hear me out. Yet you continue to avoid it, until it begins eating me alive inside. And not just Jayx… also Mirandin… why do you also refuse to talk about her?"
King Reyn frowned. "Mirandin…? I keep telling you, I don't kno—"
Before he could finish his sentence, the candles on the chandelier in the room was suddenly lit, and he saw, to Lilia's right, was a young woman with puffy red eyes and tear-stained face, staring at him with hurt and betrayal. And it clicked. Mirandin.
He hadn't meant to forget her… but he did… with Lilia finally back in his life how could his mind possibly have room to contain another woman? "Mirandin…"
"Y-Your Majesty…" she hiccupped and attempted to kneel. But Lilia stopped her.
"Reyn… how could you do this to her?" Lilia asked, a deep frown on her face. "Mirandin, tell him what you told me."
"I-I don't think, think I-I s-should—"
"Tell him…" she insisted gently.
Mirandin shifted her eyes to the ground and sniffled. "Y-Your Majesty…" she squeaked. "Y-You know I l-love you with all my heart… a-and, and for a while, I dared to imagine… what with me being the only woman left in this castle from your competition, th-that you would take me as your Queen… b-but instead… just recently, you left the c-castle for a few, f-few days, and when you came back, no-nothing was ever heard from you again… a-and I s-shouldn't be complaining, b-but it's, it's so lonely… and I really do love you, and I w-want to be your wife… not for your position or the riches, b-but…" at this, she paused, and finally brought her tear-filled eyes up to stared at him in the eyes. "But for you, my King! I do love you so… every thought of you makes it hard for me to breath, and just the thought of being in the same room as you brings me joy…"
King Reyn closed his eyes. "Mirandin…" he said softly. She was a kind young woman. She didn't deserve this. "Mirandin, I'm sorry for having left you for so long. But I should tell you now, I have already decided that Lilia here—"
"Reyn!" Lilia said sharply, silencing him. "Don't say anything you will regret."
King Reyn frowned. "Regret? Regret? How could I regret this? I have but waited for this day for ten years and you think I will regret it? I plan to announce to all the lands very soon what does it matter Mirandin knows a few days before everyone else?"
Lilia closed her eyes. "Mirandin, sweetie… please leave."
She frowned and looked back and forth between Lilia and Reyn. "Wh-What's going on here? Y-Your Majesty? W-Why is she giving or-orders…? W-Who is she…? Wasn't she just another woman in your competition that I thought had left long ago? Why is she here giving out orders?" Mirandin was starting to hyperventilate, anxiety written clearly all over her face.
"Mirandin. Do as she says… please leave." King Reyn said.
"B-But!"
"Mirandin. Leave. Now."
Mirandin took one more look at Lilia, before bursting into tears and running out the room.
The King ran his hand through his hair in agitation as he walked over and sat on their bed, facing Lilia who was seated against the windows. "Was that necessary?" He asked. "Had you let me tell her I've chosen you as my Queen, this would've gone down much easier."
Lilia stayed silent. Something about the way her eyes looked reminded Reyn of something… something unpleasant.
"Lilia… what's going on…" there was a hint of caution in his voice.
"Reyn…" she finally said after a few minutes of silence. "I tried talking to you about this so many time but you would not… and so I had to make this decision on my own."
"Lilia…"
"Reyn… the way I ended things with Jayx… it wasn't fair. It was just me being immature and avoiding problems. He is still my husband and I must go back to him."
Reyn felt his heart freezing over at her words. He couldn't believe it. For a moment his mind went blank. No… Not again! For God sakes, why couldn't that man just die?
"I'm sorry Reyn, I do love you so much, but being with you is me being childish and irresponsible… and I cannot continue this anymore without feeling remorseful and ashamed of myself! I was worried where that would leave you… but no more… Reyn, let's pretend this never happened… I will be forever grateful to you for your unconditional love towards me, and how you've always been there for me whenever I needed someone… but I realize now that even after all these years, I've never truly separated myself from you… in a way we never truly separated… and it's about time we did. I blame Jayx not, for all his accusations were true. But I'm about to make a commitment to my husband; a real, complete commitment. I-I… I love him. Or at least I should love him. And I will. I've decided on that. I love him and he is my sweetie, my darling, my life.
"Reyn… you will be fine. Mirandin is an amazing girl who loves you—"
Reyn stood up. "No, no, NO! Don't you go there. I don't want Mirandin, I want you Lilia, just YOU!"
Lilia closed her eyes tightly, biting her lower lip. But no matter what she did, the tears began to fall. She wanted this to be quick and painless but it seems she could never leave Reyn with a clean break. "I-I'm sorry, t-this is not up for discussion…"
And that's when Reyn noticed something. He didn't know how he could've not noticed this before… Lilia was out of her fancy dress and was instead in a simple, peasant dress and a coat. And next to her feet was a sack. Full of things. "Y-You… You…"
Lilia closed her eyes and quickly stood, grabbing the bag next to her legs. "I-I'm leaving tonight."
For a moment Reyn could not comprehend. He stood and stared at her, trying to convince himself this was a nightmare. No words could form.
Lilia stared at his face, trying to remember each of his features. "I'm sorry Reyn… I'm so sorry…" when he didn't say anything and simply continued to stare without blinking, without expression, she wiped at her eyes and ran past him heading for the door.
And that's when Reyn's senses returned. "GODDAMMIT LILIA IS THIS SOME KIND OF A JOKE TO YOU?" He pounded at the bed, before running after her. "STOP! I COMMAND YOU STOP!"
But Lilia would not. She ran and she ran, through the corridors heading for the castle gates. "No Reyn, go find Mirandin before she loses all hope!"
"NO! DON'T YOU EVER TELL ME WHAT TO DO! HOW DARE YOU—HOW DARE YOU! DO YOU FIND THIS FUNNY? CONSTANTLY HURTING ME LIKE THIS?"
"Of course not! I'm not trying to hurt you!"
"YOU ACCUSED ME TO NEVER LOVING YOU BUT ALL ALONG DO YOU SEE NOW? IT'S ALWAYS BEEN YOU THAT'S HURT ME! BUT DO I COMPLAIN? NO I STILL LOVE YOU UNCONDITIONALLY! GET THE HELL BACK HERE!"
But Lilia continued to run. She couldn't stop now. If she stopped now, she would be too weak and she could never get out…
And so it continued. King Reyn shouting after her, more angry than she had ever seen him. But she did not blame him; this was the umpteenth time she's left him, and broke his heart… he had every right to be upset with her… she wished he would even call her obscene names, if it would ease his pains even a little.
But he would not. Even in his moment of anger he could never call her anything other than what she is—and that is the perfect woman for him.
As they got closer and closer to the castle entrance, his anger faded bit by bit, and was instead replaced by fear and panic and despair.
Finally, as she finally burst through the castle gates and into the empty field, Reyn let out a heart-wrenching sob. "No! Lilia!"
Something about the way he said her name… Still a good three meters away from him, she stopped in her tracks. Her tears fell down continuously as she thought about the once powerful and majestic man known as Reyn Lin III, who after her many tortures and heartbreaks has been reduced to this powerless and dejected man before her right now.
His shoulders were slumped, each of his step slow and unstable.
"No! Lilia, please, you can't go, you just can't!"
Queen Lilia turned back as a tear traced down her face. "It was a mistake for me to come back… the argument with Jayx was all my fault, and you are the last person I should've came to. I must get going now… it was nothing more than an argument…" it sounded as though she was trying to convince herself. "Stay with Mirandin. She loves you."
"I love you."
Queen Lilia shook her head violent as she continued her way forward. "I have to be getting home soon, if my dear knew I came here, perhaps I would never be able to redeem myself for what I've done to him. I must go back to him before he finds me anywhere near this castle."
King Reyn took a few bold steps and grabbed her hand. "You are home, Lilia, you are my wife." Seeing her unwavering eyes, though she was deeply pained inside, he knew he would have to break the news to her. "Lilia, my Queen, I have done something beyond resentment to you, something so filthy if you choose not to forgive me this crime will stain me no matter how many times I reincarnate."
"What is it?" Her voice was alert.
"Queen Lilia… that night when you were so hurt, you were drunk with sorrow, you needed me, I know. But I needed you too, Lilia, in many ways, and I have not realized how much I truly missed you until the day you returned."
"What have you done?" She demanded. "What night was I drunk? No, wait, don't tell me… it's that night isn't it? Oh dear lord, it has to be… that night, which I seem to have no—
"What the bloody hell, this is how it ends?" Syaoran growled in frustrated. It was getting so intense! "I can't believe this…" he mumbled. Never would he have imagined that he'd regret the day he insulted this book and slapped it out of Sakura's hand. Now the last page is missing and it's driving him mad. "Ridiculous…" he mumbled, tossing the book back onto the bed stand, hoping not to think about it.
Briefly, the King glanced outside, and realized that the sun had already set. He was extremely hungry and wanted nothing more than a nice meal and shower, but he had said he wouldn't leave this room until he saw Sakura, and so he decided he should and will keep that promise to prove to the Gods his determination and sincerity.
However, more hours passed, and neither Sakura nor Meiling returned. Soon, though unwillingly, the King fell asleep.
—
Perhaps the higher beings had recognized his earnestness, and took pity on him, because that night, Sakura decided she needed to return to her dorm.
As the sun set and the moon rose, the men bid the ladies goodnight, as the ladies changed into their sleeping gowns to get ready for bed.
But as Sakura fidgeted with her garment, something occurred to her. "Girls… I… I think I should return to my dorm tonight."
Tomoyo and Meiling looked at her strangely. "Sakura…? Is everything alright?"
"I-It's fine… I mean, it's not alright, but I think… I think it's going to be soon. Or, at least it should be soon. I love you girls so much, and I loved Ilonka so much, but… maybe we shouldn't be putting our lives on hold anymore."
"Where… is this coming from?"
"Don't take this the wrong way, please, but I just think maybe a night alone would do me some good. We've been comforting one another all these weeks, but also feeding off of each other's sadness. I'm terrified of spending the night alone—just the thought of it scares me, but I think it's something that needs to be done eventually… and tonight seems as good of a night as any… so… I think I'm going to return to my dorm."
Tomoyo frowned, but eventually sighed and allowed a tiny smile on her lips. "Perhaps there is some sense in what you're saying… if it's what you wish, I won't take offense to it."
"Thank you, Tomoyo. I promise to come see you tomorrow."
"Do you want me to come back with you?" Meiling asked.
"No, I'll be alright… stay with Tomoyo; you've been more of Tomoyo's roommate than mine anyway, even before the… trial." Sakura smiled as she gave both her friends a hug. "Have a goodnight, and I will come by tomorrow morning before breakfast."
"Same to you. And if it becomes too difficult, feel free to come back."
"I will, I will." And Sakura took a deep breath, and stepped out of Tomoyo's room for the first time in weeks.
Even as Sakura walked in the silent halls, she could feel her heart beating rapidly. And more than once she wanted to turn around and return to the comfort of Tomoyo's room, where her friends were. But she knew she could not. This was something that had to done, and she didn't want to become someone that would deny the world and hide in an isolated room for the rest of her life.
Fortunately for her she had been down this path so many times it mattered not that the only lighting was from the moon. She felt her way around the stony hallway, and eventually fumbled her way to her room.
As she opened the door and stepped into that once familiar room known as her room, she felt herself letting out a deep breath she hadn't been aware she was holding in.
"Well, that was harder than it needed to be…" she mumbled walking over to her bed, sitting down.
"Oh!" she let out a little yelp as she felt something on her bed. "What the…" she mumbled tracing her hand along the object. It felt like cloth. Cloth covering something. But what is it? What is this… is this… is this… skin? And what are these?
The object in her hand twitched.
These are… these are… Sakura frozen. Oh my gosh… are they… are they toes? There is a person on my bed! Horrified, Sakura jumped up and threw herself against the furthest wall, starring wide-eyed at her bed, trying to make out as much as she could from the moonlight.
And then the figured turned, and she saw a face.
"!" She screamed.
The person on her bed jumped up half dazed from her loud cry. "Whathewho?" he slurred, blinking his eyes rapidly trying to adjust. "Sakura? Sakura… Sakura! My goodness… Sakura, it's me!" The King said, taking large strides towards her, and attempting to cover her mouth.
"GET AWAY FROM ME!" She shrilled. Oh this is perfect! The one night she decides to leave her friends to be brave and this is what happens? That's it—never leaving Tomoyo's room!
"SAKURA IT'S ME!"
"STOP IT YOU CAN'T—" The voice, it sounded familiar… so familiar… "You can't… you can't…" So, very, familiar… it can't be, could it…?
And two hands cupped her cheeks and he put his face directly in front of her, staring into her eyes. "Sakura, it's me. Look at me, it is me. Syaoran."
Sakura's eyes widened. It's been so long since she'd seen him, and the last few times she had seen him the images of him were so blurry from all the tears. The last few times she saw him she remembered hating him. But in that moment, all was forgotten and she could only feel joy filling her heart. "K-King Syaoran?"
And he smiled. "Yes, Sakura, it's me."
For a while, Sakura could barely believe it was actually happening, and all she wanted to do was melt in his arms and stare into those eyes that she had so missed… they've once again retained the warmth and kindness that she loved. But after some time when reality sunk in, she quickly composed herself and pulled away from him, standing a good three feet away from him. "W-What… are you doing here, Your Majesty?"
The King frowned slightly. "To see you, of course."
Sakura felt her heart skip a beat. But forced it not to show in her voice. "See me? Whatever would you need to see me for?"
"I think we need to talk. There are things I believe we need to discuss, and clear between us."
And Sakura knew exactly what he was talking about. For a moment there she wanted to tell him that she didn't want to talk about Ilonka, because she didn't know if she could do so with him without becoming upset with him. For a moment she wanted to suggest that maybe, just maybe they can pretend it never happened; at least just between them. But even as the thought was forming in her mind she realized how childish and irresponsible that idea was. And so she said, "Perhaps…"
The King smiled gently. "Good, I will send someone to escort you to my room tomorrow morning. It is late, I bid you good night, Lady Sakura." Hesitantly, he kissed her quickly on the cheek, before turning around to leave.
As Sakura watched his retreating figure, a deep longing filled her heart, and she couldn't help but to cry out, "Wait! Your Grace, please wait!"
"Yes?" He asked, facing her.
Sakura took a few steps forward, closer to him. "Perhaps… we could talk now…" Perhaps, she just didn't want him to leave.
The King stared into her eyes for the longest time, as if searching for something. But at last, he smiled. "I appreciate your suggestion, but it's late, and we both need our rest. It's best to save this talk to tomorrow, when we're both more clear-headed." As much as he didn't want to leave, this was the responsible thing.
And Sakura nodded slowly, and watched him leave. As the door closed behind him, she suddenly felt very alone.
Just one more night…
—
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Author's Note: so I realized the 'ending' to 'Love' is kinda different than what was written in chapter 2… but I couldn't make it fit otherwise so… I'll be changing chapter 2 soon to fit it. Bahh.
Almost done! Love is basically done since we can't find the last page… ;) and Syao and Sakura is finally getting somewhere… so yea, still a filler-ish chapter, but hope you guys enjoyed it!
Admittedly when I was rereading It I was kinda like OMG Lilia wtf you're doing this AGAIN? Make up your freakin' mind lady but it's necessary to the plot I swear!
8,505 words.