Questions!
Tosh picked up the first wedding magazine from the pile she had set up on the kitchen table. They had arrived that morning from her long-time girlfriend Samantha. When Samantha had asked for her help and said she would send up some magazine she wasn't expecting a box of twenty. They were filled with post-it notes with questions which made it clear confusion reigned. It was surprising because normally her stalwart friend knew her own mind. Samantha was one of those lucky people who, when faced with a choice just could make her mind up in an instant. She never had doubts. Getting married however seemed to have unhinged this part of her personality. There was so much choice she couldn't choose. Should she wear white? Have a carriage? Limo? How many bridesmaids? Groomsmen? Should she have a theme? If so, what sort? Colours, flowers, cake; who to invite? Sit down meal or buffet? Doves, photographs, venues, traditional, more laid back...the list was endless. Tosh turned the page.
A half hour had passed when Tosh heard Ianto enter the room. She looked up and saw a look of serious purpose on his face. Tosh recognised the look; it was a particular glint in Ianto's eye and was accompanied by a set look to his jaw. Tosh knew what it meant and her stomach twisted as she heard the words, "I want to do some cooking."
Ianto loved to cook, but she wondered if he had always been such a disaster in the kitchen. When they were at Torchwood together he was renowned for his wonderful coffee but she noted he always brought in food already prepared. She recalled Jack had made a few comments about Ianto's non-existent cooking ability. At the time she had thought it was good-natured ribbing. As she thought about it now Jack had always managed to divert offers of a home cooked at Ianto's into a restaurant meal.
Ianto did try and he could help prepare, peeling carrots, or a make hot drinks, sandwiches and mashed potatoes. It was the basics and he loved helping in any way he could. However anything complicated, and even with supervision, things went wrong.
"And what were you thinking?" Tosh asked cautiously hoping he wasn't going to say the dreaded word.
Ianto clapped his hands together. "I want to make a cake."
Tosh felt a lump of dread settle in her stomach because no matter how much effort or care Ianto put in he had the hand of death when it came to cooking cakes. His failures were legendary. Jack had joked just the day before that they should just throw the ingredients in the bin at least that way they save on the power. Even Marigold had turned up her nose at his last effort. It had taken a week of rain before it had finally dissolved into the ground. It was so heavy Tosh was convinced the birds wouldn't eat it because they knew flight would be impossible if they did. "What sort of cake?"
"A fruit cake!" he declared. "Billy loves dried fruit and we are going out tomorrow afternoon to my first 'Ferret Club' meeting I was thinking I could make one for all the ferrets."
"That's very thoughtful." Her mind went over the list of ferret products Ianto had, hoping there was one for severe indigestion.
Ianto pulled open one of the kitchen drawers, took out a large recipe book and handed it to her. She looked up the index, to see if there was a recipe that Ianto couldn't ruin.
"What about this one?" She pointed out a recipe they hadn't tried before.
"Boiled fruit cake," he read out the title, thought for a moment then nodded. "I think Billy will really like that because he loves raisins. And if Billy likes raisins then the other ferrets will like them too and by bringing a cake all the other ferrets will be his friend." He took breath and looked at Tosh. "It's very important because this is his very first real play day where he will meet other ferrets. I would really like it if he had a friend and if I take a cake we might get to go again."
With care they went down the list of ingredients and started to lay them out on the bench.
"There is something I always wanted to ask you." Tosh directed Ianto to add all the dried fruit they had measured out into a saucepan. "Why does he have such a fancy name?"
"Billy?"
"No. 'Sir Henry Bilbo Baggins the Third'?"
Ianto became dreamy. "When I was looking though the paper and I saw his picture, words came in my head. They said, 'love me, feed me, protect me', and then when I saw him for real I knew his name was 'Sir Henry Bilbo Baggins the Third'. "
"It's a very fancy name," Tosh said as she got Ianto to carefully measure out the sugar.
"That's because he deserves a fancy name so no one can ever forget him."
"Trust me Ianto; no one who ever met Billy could ever forget him."
Ianto added the sugar along with butter and juice to join the other ingredients in the saucepan. "I love him very much and he loves me. We play and chase each other. He hides things and he makes me laugh every day."
"Now we need to turn the heat to low," Tosh instructed and watched as Ianto carefully turned the knob to a low heat.
"We had better be careful because last time the cake came out real bad, and I want this one to be extra special good," Ianto told her.
"Well, you stand there and watch it come to the boil and give it a quick stir." She handed him a wooden spoon.
Ianto immediately attacked the mixture with vigour, almost causing some of the contents to spill. "Gently," she demonstrated.
With Ianto settled she tided the kitchen and returned to her magazines.
"That's a looks interesting Tosh, it's got loads of people all dressed up," Ianto said looking over her shoulder and stirred the contents of the saucepan gently.
"They're wedding magazines," Tosh said not paying any attention as she read the first post-it note which had one word on it: 'HELP!'
"What's a wedding?"
"It's where two people who love each other very much get together and have a big party. First they say special words that tell everyone how much they love each other," she explained. She was about say more when the magazine was lifted out of her hands.
"Everyone is dressed up real fancy. I don't think I've seen clothes like that before," Ianto said showing her the picture. Tosh stood and went to stand next to him
"They are wearing special wedding clothes. Everyone dresses up because it's such a huge moment in someone's life." She pointed at each person in term. "She's the bride; her dress is all in white. This is the groom. It's the bride and groom who are getting married. Bridesmaids, they help the bride; groomsmen, they help the groom."
She heard the saucepan boil over and moved over to rescue it. As she left the saucepan to cool Ianto sat down at the table examining each picture in-depth, totally absorbed. Tosh joined him and picked up the next magazine on the pile and turned to the next post-it note.
An hour had passed before they realised it. Tosh stood to check the contents of the saucepan had cooled enough to add the eggs and flour. Ianto came to join her and she managed to divert his attention by getting him to grease and paper the tin. She got him to stir the mixture a couple of times, trying to temper his enthusiasm for giving it a thorough thrashing. Scraping the bowl they tipped the contents into the tin. Carefully Ianto placed it in the oven and Tosh set the timer.
Washing up Tosh could see that Ianto was deep in thought, biting his lower lip. "How do you know when to make a wedding?" Ianto asked slowly.
"That's a good question. Normally when two people have been dating, hopefully they fall in love. They then decide that they want everyone to know how much they love each other. It's like a big coming out party where you tell everyone how serious they are about each other. It means they want spend your whole lives together as a couple."
"What's a couple?"
"It sort of an unofficial togetherness. When people are in love they start doing things together. The start sharing each other's lives very closely …"
Ianto interrupted. "What sort of things do they share?"
"Sometimes it can be sharing what they do. For example one person might like running so the other person might join in or just cheer the other person on but other times..." she stopped as thought about how to explain this. "It's sort of the next stage on from dating."
Ianto eyes widened." I asked Jack out on a date and we went to the café. He said yes because he thinks I'm handsome. We got all dressed up. Jack drove so we could keep all our clothes nice because it had rained and there was a lot of puddles in the lane. We held hands, and later we kissed loads in the car." He stopped. "So is being a couple the next stage on from dating?"
"Yes. You move in together, live in the same house and share a bedroom. They care and support each other."
"I live here with Jack. Jack said this is my house. I don't really understand what that means but he said it belongs to both him and me. He showed me a massive load of papers with big words. I got confused but Jack read some them and showed me mine and Jack's name. He said it means this is my house I own it along with him. Does that make us a couple?" He looked at her.
"Yes, and you are also lovers. I mean you share a bed and practice," she nudged him and Ianto smiled.
"Yes we do! And we have loads of cuddles." Ianto turned back to the magazine and slowly turned a page. "So two people date, then fall in love and become a couple where they move in, and are lovers. They do loads of practice," he said more to himself as if confirming the sequence of how this worked. "How does everyone in these books," Ianto turned to the page where people had sent in typical group pictures of family and friends at a wedding," know when to have a wedding?
"They just do," Tosh said.
"So everyone decides when two people fall in love, date and becomes a couple, there should have a wedding."
"Not quite. It's the couple in love that decide they want to make their feelings known to everyone. It's called commitment."
"That's a big word."
"It means they are choosing to spend your whole lives together. Part of that is wanting to share it with all your family and friends. It's a declaration to the whole world how much they mean to each other." Tosh turned a page.
"So it's a big huge love thing?"
"Oh yes very much so. It's the ultimate expression of love. You love each other so much that you want to spend your lives together and you are joining with each other so that you become one."
"Have you ever had a wedding?" Ianto asked.
Tosh shook her head. "I would love to but so far I've not been very lucky."
"That's sad Tosh. I think you should fall in love and have a wedding."
"Well first I need to meet someone and go out on a date."
"You like Owen maybe you should ask him." Ianto told her.
"Well once I get back to Cardiff…"
"You should ask him next time he comes. Go to the café. If you ask nicely Maureen will put maple syrup on your ice cream."
"I will keep that in mind," Tosh added.
"What does ultimate mean?"
"In the case of weddings it means the one biggest, most perfect thing."
"So if you love someone the best in the whole world you get all dressed up and have a huge party then tell everyone how you love each other," Ianto reflected back his understanding.
"Yes."
"But how do you get to a wedding? How does that work? I mean does everyone just decide and say you should have a wedding?"
"Well sometimes the couple, the two people in love, decide together. Normally one or the other asks the other to marry them."
Ianto went still and looked at her. "How?"
"There are lots of ways. Normally the one doing the asking set up a romantic evening and then ask them."
"Like how?"
"Well it doesn't have to be a romantic evening but a special time where the other person asks. They set it up to be special," she struggled to explain.
"But what do you say?"
"Well you say, 'Will you marry me?' and then you offer your lover a token, normally a ring."
"A ring?"
Tosh lifted up her hand for Ianto to examine the one small ring she wore. "You buy a special ring called an engagement ring. It means you are engaged. Then you organise a wedding."
"Who wears the ring?"
"Normally it's the person who says yes," Tosh replied.
"How do you get a ring?"
"Normally it's from a jeweller's." She saw Ianto's look of confusion. "It's a shop you buy rings and jewellery." Tosh opened the magazine to find a picture filled with rings.
"So if you love someone very much and you want to spend your life with them and want them to know how much you love them you ask them to marry you. You give them a ring as a kind of promise that it will happen. And if they love you back they will say yes and wear the ring," Ianto summed up and Tosh nodded.
"So what happens at a wedding?" Ianto asked after several moments passed.
"Well it depends on what kind of wedding you want," Tosh began. "That's why my friend Samantha sent all these up because there are so many things that you can do for a wedding. What's important is the couple getting married have the kind of wedding they want. Everyone makes it special just for them. Sort of mix and match." She could see Ianto working this through.
Later that afternoon Ianto sat cross legged out on the floor, the magazines spread around him. He had been silent for a considerable time for which Tosh was very grateful. She had never known Ianto to ask so many consecutive questions in one go. She rubbed her forehead to ease the pain.
She saw the TARDIS materialise. Standing she moved to open the French doors as Jack reached them.
"Good session?" She moved as Jack passed then collapsed on the sofa in an exaggerated heap.
"Heavy, but productive," he replied and looked around the room, his gaze settling on Ianto. "What have you been up to?"
"Nothing I'm just helping Tosh," Ianto answered very quickly bringing all the magazines together and pushing them behind himself.
"And we made a cake," Tosh told him and she saw Jack flinch and look at her, alarmed.
"It turned out well," she assured him and Jack sank back.
"It's for tomorrow. I wanted to make a fruit cake for Billy's first play date. I really want him to make friends so we can go back another time," Ianto said and he moved to next to Jack on the sofa. "Are you really okay? I always get a bit worried when you go in the TARDIS," Ianto asked and put his arms around Jack.
"Yes I am. It all went well." Jack looked towards the garden kissing the top of Ianto's head.
"And you made a cake?"
"Yes it's a boiled fruit cake but I got busy with something and Tosh had to finish it off." Ianto looked across as Tosh gave him the thumbs up and he smuggled into Jack.
"Busy?"
"Very," Ianto replied.
Hearing the toot of a horn Tosh opened the door to see Ianto cradling Billy who was stretched out fast asleep along his forearm. There was the sound of a horn behind him and he waved his hand. "Did you have a good time?"
"Yes we did. Billy made loads of friends. Ferrets make friends very quickly. There was Whiskey, and Bobby, George and Tusken; those were just the boys. There was Rascal, Beauty, and Dasher; those were the girls. I was a bit worried at first in case the other ferrets didn't like him. I put him down and after a lot of sniffing each other's bums they then started playing. I found out that they sniff their bums then they lick each other's necks and try to sort each other out." He laughed. "It was so funny; Billy was trying to walk with Whiskey, Bobby and Tusken on top of him. Then Billy and the others did the same to Whiskey. He played so much he's all tuckered out. He fell asleep ages ago," he said gently easing him onto his hammock
"How did they like the cake?" she asked as Ianto tucked a small blanket around him.
"Oh they loved it!" he declared. "It was big hit, I put the cake down on the floor and they went right for it." He started laughing as he tried to speak. "They made such a mess. There was cake everywhere; it was all over the floor, along the hall. Whiskey had a right dig at it. It was hilarious they hid bits all over the place. That's why I'm a bit late I stayed to help clean up," he told her.
"So did you meet lots of nice people?"
"Yes I did. They are all as mad as I am. We talked and talked and talked. I told them all about how naughty Billy was and what he gets up to and how much he love Jack's socks. And they told me all about how naughty their ferrets were. We talked about what food was good, and treats and oils. It was so interesting."
"So are you going to join the club?"
"Oh yes I am. I handed over my ten pounds." He took out his wallet and showed her the receipt. "I get sent a newsletter every two months and a card with my name and a number on it. I am member 138. It will have a special plastic cover. It will come in the mail. I've even made a special place for it." He opened his wallet to show her the slot. "Next time we're meant to meet at Gary's house. But he has to ask his mum first. I also got given a list with everyone's names and telephone numbers so we can ring and talk to each other." He took a deep breath and pointed to himself proudly. "And I am now on that list."
"It sounds like you had a wonderful time," Tosh smiled as Ianto now unpacked his backpack.
"Is Jack upstairs asleep?" he asked quietly looking around to make sure they were alone. "I have something to ask you and I didn't want Jack to know what I am asking." Ianto looked serious and closed the hall door.
"It's about weddings." Tosh braced herself. She had hoped he had finally run out of questions. He had been relentless and had just had the equivalent of the most intense breakdown of romantic love, weddings and all that it entailed in less the 24 hours. "When I was looking through all the magazines all the wedding things was between ladies and men. Does that mean only ladies and men can get married?"
Tosh blinked and thought fast on her feet. "No, love is love. If two people love each other and they want to they get married. It can be same sex couples, like two men or two women or like my friend Samantha, who is a lady, is marrying a man." Tosh saw him take a deep breath. "The magazines have mostly men and women because there are not as many men who marry each other but there are many websites we could go to that deal just with two men getting married or two ladies."
Ianto looked visibly relieved at her words." I was a bit worried that maybe only ladies and men could get married, because there was nothing in the magazines that had two men. Because that wouldn't be fair if two men loved each other and wanted to get married and everyone else could."
Opening the door he double-checked they were alone closing he looked serious. "Do you think Jack will say yes if I asked him to marry me?"
Tosh stared at him for a moment then gave herself a mental smack on the head as she realised every question Ianto had asked had been leading to this. Her thoughts went to how Jack had held Ianto in his arms almost continually for nine months. Filled his life with the love and constancy he so desperately needed and even put up with having his socks stolen out of his deep and abiding love of this man. "Yes I think he will."
Ianto relaxed. "I think so too but I thought I had better check." Ianto went over to his desk and pulled out a pad of paper. She could see it was filled with list that filled every line. Ianto smoothed out the top sheet. "First I have to choose a ring. I don't want it to be girly so I drew this," He flipped over the page and showed her a drawing of a flat band of gold with a small indented heart with a diamond in it.
"I want to organise a spring wedding in the garden. I want it to be spring because Jack said he would be a bit better then and spring means new beginnings. And the garden is very special. Billy is going to be the ring bearer. I'm going to ask Mac to give me away. I want to invite all my friends like Morag, Marigold and Mr and Mrs Morgan, you and Owen even the Doctor can come and loads of other people I have on my list. And I want to tell everyone I love Jack with all my heart so everyone knows and I am going to love him forever and ever."
A tear trickled down Tosh's face. "I think that will be beautiful," she burst out and hugged him.
"Have I made you sad?" Ianto hugged her back, confused.
"No, it's that people cry lots at weddings because they are so happy." She took out a tissue and blew her nose.
"I had better add tissues to my list," Ianto said.
"Hey if there's a group hug I want in," Jack said walking into the room.
"Is everything okay?" he asked seeing Tosh looked flushed and appeared to be crying.
"Jack, everything is the most wonderful it is possible to be," she dabbed her eyes with a handkerchief, "with more wonderful to come,"
"I like that," Jack said putting his arms around them. "More wonderful to come."
"Extra special exciting wonderful to come," Ianto agreed.
Jack became cautious. "We're not talking more ferrets here are we?"
Ianto shook his head. "No, something even better," he kissed Jack's cheek.
"That's alright then," Jack agreed as he gave Ianto a huge hug.