So, Chapter Five is nigh.
This is the shortest chapter yet and possibly the shortest of them all so I'll try to get chapter six up quickly!
Anyhow...
Turns out that it was midday when I ran from the house the other day, and I got back at half past seven to Bella and Charlie, both sitting on the couch, ready to yell at me about how angry they were and how worried they were. Whatever. But, neither of them yelled, they both shot up and hugged me. I don't know why they hugged me, but they did. Maybe it was my blood covered knuckles from where I'd decided to take my anger out on a tree, maybe it was my tear stained face, or maybe it was that I practically broke down in their arms.
Whatever their reasons, I'm thankful.
Paul called, but I ignored my cell, staying in bed for the rest of the day. I slept the entire night and all through the next day. I wanted to ask if Jacob had called, but after how I treated him, I knew he wouldn't have.
Bella sat with me all night when I began to cry, and she told me that Jacob had still been there when they got back, and that he told them about my mom doing drugs, and how I haven't been in school for five years, and everything else that I'd trusted him with, so when I'd finally left my room to make a sandwich, Charlie exclaimed that he was confused, raising his hand. I flinched, and then they both suddenly understood why, so they sat with me while I told them about my step father's heavy handed approach on discipline.
This morning Bella and Charlie woke, still in my room. Bella was laid across the bottom of my bed while Charlie was in an old armcahir that looked literally over one hundred years old. I said nothing to either of them. I flinched when Bella touched my shoulder, panicking for no reason.
Charlie cancelled his plans to go to Seth's birthday party, apologising to Billy and Harry over the phone and telling them both that he had to stay here. I heard him mention that I wasn't doing well, and that he'd seen evidence of self harm, so I covered my wrist and pulled a hoodie on to cover the scar on my neck.
For the first time in my life, I couldn't care less about my mother. If someone rang me today and told me that she'd died, I don't think I'd react at all.
Half an hour ago there was a knock on the door, one which Bella answered while Charlie went up for a shower. And ten minutes ago in walked Paul Lahote, sweaty, wet from the rain, and shirtless. I didn't look at him, but I knew it was him from his scent and the glance of him I got in my peripheral vision.
"I don't know what's wrong with her." Bella whispers.
Paul snorts and crouches beside my bed, trying to get me to look at him. He smiles sweetly when I finally meet his gaze. "You were unresponsive for over six months, Swan, and you're telling me you don't know what's wrong with her." He replies, reaching slowly to brush a stray strand of hair from my cheek. "Her heart's broken." He mutters softly, his tone so warm and destroyed.
I screw my eyes shut, tears leak out though anyway. I flinch as his fingertips brush my jawbone, but I don't try to get away.
"You said she takes pills, what kind?" He asks her, though he's still looking at me, I can feel his gaze.
Somehow, I find my voice, surprising them both. "Anti depressants, anti anxeity, Ritalin for my ADHD, and sleeping pills at night."
"Anti depressants, they the good ones?" Paul asks me in reply, telling Bella to get them. She finds my bag, gasping at the cigarettes, but Paul merely snaps that they don't matter, that my pills do. She hands him all of the bottles since none of them have labels. I tell him that the blue ones are anti depressants, and no they're not the good ones. "Well, thay're a start. A crappy start, but a start nontheless. How many?"
I reply that I have two, so he takes three out, telling me that he knows about these and I'll be fine. I don't care if I'll be fine or not, so I take them anyway, sniffling and opening my eyes.
"Now, I've had my fair share of shitty parents, wanna swap stories?" Paul asks me, shifting me so that he can lie in the remaining room on my bed.
I don't object as he lies me on my side, putting a large muscular arm under my head and gently placing my head on his chest, my hands clasped together on his abdomen. "When I was ten," He starts, and he tells me about the first time that his father struck him. So in reply, I tell him about the first time that my step father beat me unconscious. He tenses and literally growls as I tell him each painful detail of how many bones were broken and stuff like that.
"I know you don't want to eat, but you have to." Paul tells me an hour or so later.
For some reason, I let him help me stand, and I let him keep his arm around my shoulder, securing me to ensure I don't fall. He sits me at the table, asking Bella what we've got. She asks me if I'd like some curry since I didn't get any the other night. "She doesn't want anything, she just needs to eat. If she likes it then that's what she's having." Paul tells her, seeming like he's been through this before.
Was my mom right, am I actually sinking into depression? No, this is bullshit. I'm just having a few shitty days, and when I get back to San Francisco everything will go back to normal.
Bella sticks some rice and sauce into the microwave, telling Paul to take it out after three minutes, check if it's done, then put it back in for another four before she retreats upstairs.
"Now then, little bird," Paul says, grabbing my attention. "I don't think you're depressed, I think that everything seems to have caught up to you all at once, so you're going to eat this without complaint, then me and you are going to do something to raise your adrenaline levels, like cliff diving or something."
He follows Bella's instructions, swearing like a trooper when he burns himself on the plate. I'm up in a flash, taking it from him before placing it down on the table and taking his hands into my own. He seems shocked by my actions, but it's in my nature to help people when they're hurt.
Paul tries to yank his hands away from me, but I clutch them tighter as I watch the red blisters fade before my eyes.
I look him in the eyes, he looks mad. "You're like me," I breathe out, amazed.
His angry gaze falters, giving way to confusion.
I can't help it. I laugh.
"Holy shit, I thought it was just me!" I exclaim, stepping away from him and sitting down.
"Eat." He says, taking a seat next to me. "Eat and we'll talk after."
I eat. I feel as if I'm going to be sick, and everything tastes bland, but I eat.
Paul gives me enough time to brush my teeth before he's ushering me out of the house, telling Bella that he knows how to make me better. Once we're the other side of the door I tell him that I know it's bullshit and that he wants to know what I know.
We get into his car, and ten minutes later, I don't feel so chipper anymore. I'm always like this the day after the change and for a week or so after, but this is worse than before. He drives through the woods for a while until we come to a house, much like Jacob's in the sense that it's a wood cabin, tucked away in the wilderness.
"Sam!" Paul booms the second he's out of the car, I make to get out but he stops me, telling me to sit tight for a second.
A second later, Sam and another guy come out of his house, followed by Sam's girlfriend from the bonfire. All eyes instantly lock onto me and Paul starts talking to them in a hushed whisper, too quiet for even my ears. I wait a few minutes before Paul looks at me, nodding for me to get out. I do as he tells me and walk over to them.
"What did you mean when you said that I'm like you?" Paul asks me, four pairs of eyes awaiting an answer.
I shrug. "You healed really fast, like I did." I reply, not wanting to give anythng away if they aren't like me.
"How fast do you heal?" Sam asks me, his gaze not as soft as before.
"Well, I healed fully from the car accident the night after the full moon." I tell them, but what do they want, a formula?
Sam nods. "So, you're like us, but how? You're female."
I snort. "Gender doesn't matter. You get bitten and you turn, simple as." I reply.
"Bitten?" Paul asks, raising a brow.
"Yeah," I reply, moving my hair to show the bit scar on the right side of my neck. "Oh, are you guys pure bloods?" I ask, only ever having heard about pure bloods, never having actually met one.
"Pure blood whats?"
"Wait, what are you guys?" I ask, taking a step away. "Something tells me we're all on a different page."
Sam, Paul and the other guy share a look before Sam steps forwards, I take another step back in response. "Don't freak out." Paul says as Sam kicks off his shorts, revealing- fuck, revealing everything!
I put my hand up to cover my eyes. "The fuck's wrong with you?" I snarl, but then there's a sound, a wooshing sound of sorts.
"Look again." The other guy says.
"He's put his junk away?" I ask.
"Don't worry." Sam's girlfriend says, a slight laughter to her tone.
I see why when I pull my hand away. "Dude, I thought pure bloods were scary, not overgrown dogs!" I exclaim, unable to hold in the laughter that bubble within me. "I'm so damn proud to be a half-blood right now!"
"We showed you ours, now you show us yours." Paul says, smirking at my reaction.
"Can't." I tell them, my laughter stopping. "Nothing here to trigger it. I mean, I could half turn, but that's boring, I mean, you guys probably do th-"
"What's a half turn?" The other guys asks. "I'm Jared, by the way."
"Hey, Jared, I'm River." I reply. "You guys don't know what a half turn is?" I ask as Sam turns back, I cover my eyes again until I'm told it's safe and he's got his shorts back on. "Any of you got a lighter? It's so I can show you the half turn." I say, waiting and thanking Jared as he supplies one from his pocket. I feel dumb for saying half turn so many times. It's making it lame before it's even happened. I feel like I should rename it to something cooler. Christ, half phase just sounds really bad. Like, really fucking bad.
I catch it as he throws it to me and flick the lid open, striking the clicker. The flame is large, so I hold my left hand over it, lowering my hand until the flame curls around the sides of my palm. I hiss and snarl as it burns me, falling to my knees as my other side pushes against me. Pain radiates through me and my breathing becomes ragged as my fangs force their way into my mouth and as my nails elongate into claws.
When I finally slow my breathing, I stand again, throwing Jared his lighter back. "You've never been like this before?" I question, knowing that my eyes will be black by now.
The five of us talk for hours and hours until we've compared every aspect of our other sides, I tell them that no one else can know what I am, not even others of their kind, and so they all swear not to tell anyone. Paul drives me back to Bella's and Charlie's place -minus the claws, fangs and weird black eyes- just in time for dinner, by which time I'm feeling a little better. But, as soon as my mind drifts to Jacob, all I feel is pain once more. "Stay out of trouble, little bird." Paul tells me as I climb out of his car and head towards the house. He calls me that because of my tattoo.
I nod with a small smile as he goes. My smile is so fake that it practically hurts.
I know this one's really short, but the next few are going to be kind of small in preperation for a large one -over ten thousand words, is that large? Well it is for me. Anyhow, just bare with me.
Also, I'm asking now because I haven't written one yet, but does anyone think that they'll want an epilogue? I'm only asking because the rest of this fic is already written and I'm just reading through it so with the advance I might be able to write it up and post it fairly shortly after the final chapter.