"Uh..."

"We both knew this would happen, Undyne. I'm to blame as well."

The spear in Aofil's hand fades away, and their hand drops down on the grass. They fill their other hand with Undyne's outstretched one, and she helps Aofil up from the grass.

"Sorry about your pants..."

"It's," Aofil notices that it actually is something, "nothing," they still say. They shake their leg and the ripped up strip falls off, exposing their leg from the knee down, "Doesn't look like you hit my skin though. So that's good."

"Should I," Undyne summons a slim spear and rolls it in her hand, "cut the other?" she asks with a reserved finger pointing to Aofil's fully covered leg, "Even it out?"

Aofil looks down at their pants. They blow their lips trying to decide, "I mean..." but can't come to a conclusion.

"It's sunny," Undyne tries to convince, "I can't see any clouds. So you won't be cold or anything."

Aofil taps their finger against their chin, "It gets a bit chilly after dark."

"True."

"But might as well, I guess?" Aofil shrugs, "If the weather allows for it. It's just for lunch. I can probably a new pair while we're in the city."

"So, shall I?" Undyne angles her spear towards Aofil's leg.

Aofil nods.

Undyne sheepishly returns the nod, "So, yeah," and takes a hesitant step forward, "stand still."

She pokes a hole in Aofil's other pant leg with her spear, and then neatly shuffles around Aofil, "Lift your other leg," she asks. Aofil bends their already shortified leg up, and Undyne completes the circle. She slices the tube of jeans in half before snipping it off. She picks it and the other piece up and balls them in her hand.

"You want me to do the same with your arms?"

Absolutely freaking not!

"No," Aofil summons a smile, "it's fine."

Undyne acknowledges with another disbelieving nod, "Right. Good."

The sound of the front door closing, and the subsequent voice of it informing that it is now alarmed, "Have a nice out of the house experience, Alphys!" follows the yellow lizard meandering down the pathway.

Aofil shrugs a hand towards her, and Undyne nods. They both join Alphys halfway down the pathway.

"So," Undyne pockets the torn pieces of fabric, "where to, Aofil? Remember, it's gonna have to make up for all these years, whelp!"

Alphys catches Aofil's eyes, and with a series of very impressive lettering with her hand, she spells out the name of…

"MTT..."

"No!" Undyne cuts Aofil off, "Not that one."

"Why not?"

"Oh yeah," Alphys remembers, "Last time we..."

Undyne puts her hand over Alphys' mouth, "Not important," Undyne deflects, "And there are so many others. Pick another!"

Alphys spells out another restaurant.

"I know!" Undyne exclaims before Aofil has time to piece together what Alphys signed for them, "Let's go to Muffet's!"

Alphys complains from behind Undyne's hand. She removes it, "But her prices," Alphys repeats, "I don't think she'll lower them, even for us."

Undyne leans in none too subtle to Alphys, "Aofil's paying though," she whispers none too more subtle. Alphys looks up to Aofil, who shrugs. Can't be that expensive?

Oh, it is.

"For just one doughnut?" Aofil heart almost falls out of their toes as they see the price written on the chalkboard outside Muffet's shop.

Undyne shakes her head, "Nah."

Phew.

"Spider doughnut, not just a doughnut," she corrects Aofil.

Aofil catches the sweat they dried off and puts it right back on their forehead. This must be a joke, right? Muffet did have a similar price when Aofil met her, but that must've been sarcastic, right? All she wanted then was their soul. Oh yeah, hopefully she's at least dropped that pretence.

A spider with a piece of chalk skitters out from underneath the door and walks up to the board. It jumps up and adds a zero after the Spider cider underneath the doughnut.

Guess not, then…

"You absolutely sure we have to eat here?" Aofil asks Undyne with their arms crossed. Undyne flashes a smile back.

"Should've thought about that before you left us, human!" she laughs.

The spider stops adding zeros to the other item on the menu. It leaps up to the top of the chalkboard and stands there for a couple of seconds before swinging down to the ground. It goes through Alphys' legs and stops underneath Aofil who bends their head down with a pair of raised and uncertain eyebrows.

They flinch as a string is shot up towards their head. The spider hauls itself up and hangs just in front of Aofil's face. Just as Aofil manages to wrestle their eyes into focusing on the spider it jumps off and scurries into the store. Aofil rubs their eyes as the drastic shift in focus hurts their head.

"Why did it do that?" Undyne ponders with her fingers scratching her lobe.

"You're the monster," Aofil reminds, "you tell me."

Before Undyne can snark back the door bursts open, and an enormous spider charges out. It throws itself onto Aofil who stumbles backward with it in their arms. The spider reaches for Aofil's face with its mouth and Aofil instinctively throws it away from them.

The spider lands on its feet and charges Aofil again. The stiff hairs on its body swipes Aofil's exposed legs, stinging them, but not breaking through the skin. With a grumble the spider prepares another charge, but Undyne tackles it before it can flank back towards Aofil.

"Ngah! I thought she had this eight legged mistake under control!" Undyne grunts as she struggles to keep the sporadic spider under control, "It never attacked us before!"

"M-maybe," Alphys thinks out loud, "b-because Aofil is a..."

"Human!"

Again Aofil stumbles, but this time forwards, as they're wrapped up in string and dragged into the shop. An even larger spider wraps itself around them with all of her arms. The bow tie on her head is caught in Aofil's mouth.

"You finally came! Ahuhuhu!" Muffet giggles eagerly, "I know one day you would!"

A circle of normal sized, to Aofil's enormous relief, spiders rappel down from the ceiling and twirl around Aofil and Muffet.

"Yes," Aofil agrees while simultaneously trying to wiggle as carefully as they can out of the webbing holding them up, "I'm here!"

A monster that Aofil has never seen before stands up from a chair next to them. The monster mouths a quiet thanks before running out of the shop with a whimper.

After what seems like an eternity Muffet finally let's go of Aofil, but with only one pair of arms, "I'm gonna make a special batch just for you, human," she teases with a poke on Aofil's nose. After another eternity a spider whispers something in her ear, "Oh," she realizes, and let's the rest of her arms off Aofil before heading back into her bakery.

She leaves the webbing on them though, which Aofil is having a bit of trouble getting out of.

"Muffin!" Muffet calls from the bakery, "I need your help!"

Aofil sidesteps the large spider dragging a sputtering Undyne through the front door. She looses grip when her toes hook on the doorstep, and the spider scurries past the remaining customers, who all jolt back at the sight of it.

"One day," Undyne mutters, "One day I'll punt that ball of drool back into the Underground."

Oh yeah, that's when Aofil met Muffet. Back when they first went trough the Underground. Although, that was before the reset.

Oh wait...

Shit, Muffet remembers!

Didn't seem to hurt her though, so maybe Aofil's lucky? But still, damn. Aofil thought that was done and behind them.

Like they thought the monsters were too…

"Aofil, y-you alright?"

Aofil shakes the thoughts away, "Yeah, I'm just," and tries to take a step. The webbing around their legs almost has them falling over, "Huh."

"I can...," Undyne looks down and realizes that she's still face down on the floor. She jumps up back on her feet, almost hitting Alphys with her hair, "I can cut you loose. If you want, that is."

"Yes? Is that even a question?"

Undyne winks towards the humming spider inside the bakery, "She hugged you."

"S-she did?" Alphys voice cracks from the sheer force question, and she taps her claws, "I mean, s-she did?"

"Oh yeah, she did! Which gives me an idea, Alphee."

"I'm still here," Aofil reminds, but to no effect, "Still wrapped inside this webbing."

Undyne puts her hand on Aofil's shoulder, "And for my plan to work Aofil needs to stay like this."

"So that offer about cutting me loose?" Aofil reminds while trying, and failing, not to sound sarcastic.

"We can order everything on the menu, and not pay a single piece! All you have to do, Aofil, is to..." Undyne pauses for dramatic effect while she leans in towards Aofil with a smile that stretches over her entire face.

"No," Aofil replies before Undyne can finish.

She retorts with a nod.

"No," Aofil repeats.

"Spider smooches," Undyne hangs on every syllable, dragging the words out until they're as stretched out as her smile, "All of the spider smooches, Aofil."

"Let me think it over," Aofil doesn't, "No!"

"Come on," Undyne sloshes around dramatically, "Would you rather pay what she's priced her stuff? Look!" Undyne points to another spider with a piece of chalk making its way outside, "She's raising them again!"

"Alphys," Aofil sighs, "Please help me."

"U-Undyne, why don't we just eat somewhere else? I can talk to Mettaton and have him lift our ban."

"Go outside and call him then," Undyne suggests, "but when the waste of steel eventually says no, we'll continue with my plan."

"Oh," Alphys wasn't prepared for that answer, "alright," she whips out her phone from her pocket and steps out of the store.

"Even if Alphee manages," Undyne's face sinks into a tired frown, "I still don't want to eat there. It always leaves a plastic taste in my mouth. Most likely because he actually serves plastic!"

"That may be so, but you know what would leave an even worse taste? Kissing a spider just so that you can eat for free, Undyne!"

Undyne lifts a finger to reply, but she's interrupted by a metallic crash from the bakery. Her face freezes, and when Aofil turns around to see what might've caused it, theirs freezes too.

Six hands quiver in the doorway to the kitchen. Five eyes stare stunned at the wrapped up human. Four cups fall of their plates, and smash against the floor. Three fingers lose strength, allowing the kettle in them to follow the cups. Two lips shake as they try to form words.

And one quiet sob fills the shop.

With her head hanging low, and her arms swinging like cooked and tired spaghetti, Muffet returns back into her bakery. A small army of smaller spiders emerge from the woodwork to carry the broken porcelain and bent kettle after her.

The shop is quiet, and the rest of the customers takes the opportunity to sneak out as quietly as possible. They all thank Aofil and Undyne on the way out.

"Oh, goosebumps," Alphys notices as she returns into the store, "I've read about these. They aren't hurting, right, Aofil? They're all over your legs, so hopefully that isn't the case. It isn't that cold in here though. Compared to outside, yes, but you didn't leave? I would've noticed if you did. Why did the rest of the customers leave though?"

"Alphys," Undyne whispers.

"Hm?" Alphys manages to tear her eyes off Aofil's legs, "Ah, yes. Mettaton promised to lift the ban, b-but," she wrings her hands together, "y-you have to h-help him with endorsing h-his new fashion line."

"Yeah, sure," Undyne answers without hearing what Alphys said. She summons a small spear and cuts Aofil loose, "We should go."

Aofil rolls their stiff shoulders out now that they can, "I feel like I should apologize to her."

"And risk her pet biting your freaking face off?"

Aofil glances back at the bakery. Failed attempts to hold back sobs echo from out of it. There's also a low and angry growling next to it.

Aofil decides that a face saved is better than a saved face, and follows Undyne out the shop.

"Now that that plan's gone," Undyne starts after a sigh once they're all out of charging spider distance, "Alphys, did you manage to convince that squeaky vacuum to let us in again, Alphys?"

"Y-yes."

"Great!," Undyne exclaims. Her face immediately turns into a frown as she wonders if it really is that great.

Aofil snaps Undyne out of her thinking with a snap of their fingers, "Is the restaurant far away from here?" they ask Alphys after snapping once again to challenge Undyne's dare for them to try it one more time.

"H-he said to not worry about walking."

Aofil wrestles their head out of Undyne's lock around it, "Is it that close?" Undyne catches it back with a playful chuckle.

"No, it's on the other side of the c-city."

"So how do we get there?" Undyne taps on Aofil's skull with her finger, "Any great ideas in here, Aofil? Besides not listening to my warnings? Ngah!"

Her footsteps halt in place as a screeching sound flies around the corner. She lets go of Aofil and pushes her palms against her forehead while almost throwing her back out as she lunges her head up towards the sky, "Anything but that!"

Before Aofil has time to ask a bright pink and matte black limousine screeches, but this time to a halt, right next to them. Aofil trusts their instincts and takes a step back from the door. A second after it is kicked open by a pink metallic boot. It whirs back into the limousine.

An equally extended hand stops Alphys from taking another step forward towards the car, "The human first," informs a voice from inside. The hand retracts as well, leaving room for Aofil to get inside.

"You must be Aofil," Mettaton greets, "I've heard quite a bit about you, human."

Aofil scoots in a bit so that Alphys and Undyne can get in as well. Undyne closes the door so hard that the handle comes off. She shows it to Mettaton with an innocent smile, "Whoops, my mistake."

"Mistake alright," Mettaton mumbles and subsequently ignoring the stare from Undyne. He knocks carefully on the tinted window towards the driver, "To the restaurant, dear."

"You got it," comes a muffled response before the limousine takes off in a haste.

"So, human," Mettaton starts by crossing his legs, "what's your agent's number?"

Aofil's face contorts in confusion, "Agent?"

"Oh," Mettaton produces a pen from his finger, and a stack of papers from the seat in front of him, "even better."

"I'm not signing it."

"Human, darling, don't be so rash now. It's just a formality."

Aofil runs their finger through the mountain of papers, "A formality that killed a tree. I'm not signing it, or anything else, for that matter."

Mettaton puts his arm over Aofil, "My dearest human."

Sparks crackle next to Aofil's ear as Undyne drives a spear through Mettaton's arm, "You might need to tinker a bit with Mettaton's hearing, Alphee. Apparently he can't hear when someone says no. Remove his entire head while you're at it!"

"Oh my," Mettaton fakes dread, "The head of the Royal Guard has once again gone off and attacked an undeserving form of a human," and returns his crackling arm back to himself, "She's learned to do it to one in her own size though."

The spear grows in width, and separates Mettaton's arm in two, "Good luck pointing fingers at me now," Undyne growls. She evaporates her spear and sinks down into her seat with her arms crossed.

"U-Undy?" Alphys stammers in fear.

"It's nothing, Alphee," she replies while battling her face to stay unfazed. She shoots a glaring look at Mettaton, who's too busy taking Aofil's measurement without them noticing, "This toaster has as much impact on me as his acting careers has successes."

"The only lip I want from you, Undyne love, is them taut in a smile while you're presenting my new MTT branded fashion line. It doesn't have to be genuine, but it has to be there if I'm to go through with lifting your ban. If we compare monetary value this is but a drop in the money bucket, dear. I'm extending my hand to you, even though you cut it off."

Aofil finally realizes the measuring tape around their waist, "Hey!" but Mettaton's already finished.

"Fashion line? Like hell that I want to wear anything made by you!" Undyne spits out, "I'm pretty sure it would catch fire just like the camera you gave us."

Mettaton cocks his head in genuine bewilderment, "Then why did you get in the car, dearie? I told Alphee that was my one condition."

Undyne cocks her head in equal confusion, "When did you say that, Alphee?"

Alphys' claws tap together nonrhythmically, "I-I did say that to you, U-Undyne. You said y-yes."

"I did? When?"

"A-after I called Mettaton."

"You do have to do it more often, Alphee," Mettaton intersects, "There's ever so much I want to discuss with you, sweetie."

"I was busy preparing for Muffet or her pet to lunge out at us! I've never seen her that upset before, who knew what she would've done? She jumps into Aofil's arms, and then she overhears them saying that she's disgusting."

"It's not what I said," Aofil corrects.

"It's what she heard, Aofil!" Undyne shouts over Alphys' head, "And trust me, I've had to deal with her for far less than that."

"Muffet?" Mettaton asks with a curios knuckle under his chin, "How is that adorable arachnid doing? I really must try and get some of her confectionery for my restaurant," his head moves robotically to Aofil, "You said she jumped into Aofil's arms?"

"Judging by the last time you hired Muffet…," Undyne mumbles with clenched teeth.

"You want to fill her in on that, Alphee?" Mettaton asks with a plastered smile.

A speaker mounted on the roof informs with a muffled voice, "We'll be arriving in a short while, M."

"For as much as I love to bring up old memories, Undyne, I'd love more an answer."

"No, I'm not gonna get within a spear length of you or your fashion!"

Mettaton sighs dramatically, "What a shame," as the car stops. The door Undyne's leaning on is opened, and she falls out onto a red carpet. Mettaton opens his door and basks in the camera flashes firing off in rapid succession.

"My dears! My darlings! My everythings!" he greets the crowd outside, "Thank you all so much for joining me this day for this marvelous event! The new collection of MTT fashion is within your grasps, and to show how much like me you will, maybe, be, I have with me the one and only," Mettaton knocks on the top of the car and it speeds away, "Undyne!"

Aofil and Alphys can only watch through the back window as Undyne stands up with a spear forming in her hand. Mettaton leans in quick to her, and after a second the spear in Undyne's hand disappears.

"Oh n-no!" Alphys grips her tail and holds it tight. She looks to Aofil for an answer, but they know just as much as she does.

After a minute or so the car eventually slows down. Aofil tries to open the door, but it's locked. They knock on the window to the driver, "The doors?"

They hear the driver door open and the lock on their own door disengaging.

"Yoooo!"

Aofil narrows their eyes, "MK?"

Standing in a suit, with his chin on the top of the door, MK's smile widens until it almost tears his cheeks apart, "Teacher! Wow!"

"Wow, indeed," Aofil agrees while helping Alphys out of the car. MK closes the door behind her and almost bounces up in the air with glee.

"And Alphys! Wow! I've been driving you two?"

"Yeah, apparently you have. Listen, what's Mettaton's plan with Undyne?"

MK's eyes expand until they almost knock over his hat, "Undyne too? Where is she?"

"You dropped her off a minute or so ago," Aofil points up the road, "She and Mettaton."

MK pauses for a minute to think. His protruding scales tenses the fabric at the basis of them while he thinks with his head lowered. He shoots up after a couple of seconds, "Is she gonna be modeling? Maybe I should ask if Radentim could persuade an autograph from Undyne."

His head lowers back into thinking, "But then, why are you two here?"

"Um, you tell us?" Aofil asks, very much eager to hear the answer.

MK nods to a door, "That one leads to backstage, as M likes to call it. I'm guessing because you two are also gonna be modeling? He told me to drop off his guests here."

"M-modeling?" Alphys repeats with a squeal of fear. She looks down at herself, and her tail again finds her hands.

The door opens and a monster with a clipboard halfheartedly waves Aofil and Alphys in, "Radentim session with Undyne, come on."

MK taps on Aofil's shoulder with his tail, "Yoo, teacher. It's good to see you again. Are you gonna move here from your city?"

"I'm thinking about it."

"Cool! I still know the cloud trick, by the way!"

"Really? That's nice of you."

MK is forced to abandon it halfway as a voice starts talking in his ear, "Again? Even quicker? Yes, M. I'm on my way, M," he responds, "Sorry, boss called," he apologizes and jumps back into the car. With a slick three point turn he flies back up the alley he came from.

Aofil nods. That's some impressive driving.

Wait… No! Damn it!

Aofil forgot to ask how MK can drive!

"Hey! We're on a schedule here!" shouts the impatient monster from the doorway, "Let's go! M will have my paycheck if you're not there in time!"

"A-Aofil..." Alphys begs.

Maybe next time Aofil will remember to ask…

"Yeah, we're on our way..."

The corridor the monster takes Aofil and Alphys through is filled with commotion. Clothes are flung from room to room, and Aofil is bumped on more than one occasion. The monster leading the way pays it no mind. His clipboard seems to be his only focus. He doesn't even look up from it as he opens a door for Aofil and Alphys, "In here," and closes it behind them.

On a chair in front of a mirror sits Undyne, her one hand squeezing the leather on the chair, and the other holding a crumpled photograph. Obscenities flow from her mouth like a ferocious river through her gritted teeth.

Alphys approaches her slowly.

"A-are you alright?" she asks carefully.

"I knew that camera he gave us was rigged. I knew it!"

Alphys catches a glimpse of the photograph in Undyne's hand. She puts her hands up to her face, and turn to Aofil with it blossoming bright red. Aofil catches a glimpse of it as well, and their face blossoms as well as they see what it's from.

The adult anime the three of them stumbled upon.

"Yeah," Undyne says, destroying the photograph in her hand in a fizzle of magic, "I'm gonna smash it when we get home, Alphee. I don't care if it's just ash. I'm gonna find a way!"

Aofil decides not to let on that they saw it. They wonder how in the world Undyne managed to get into that small of a dress though.

Maybe it's not too bad to ask?

They don't have time too, as Mettaton opens the door beaming with joy and energy, "Darlings! So glad to have you all here! Radentim should be with you shortly, but first I'd like to introduce to you your fourth model."

He steps aside, and with his hand and head bowed he welcomes in…

"Human!"

Oh god no.

"Yes, Muffet," Mettaton reaffirms, "that is indeed the human. Like I said, Aofil is really hurtful over their actions and words. So much so that they want to reconcile with you. Isn't that right, Aofil? Show us what's in your back pocket."

Back pocket?

Aofil pats it, and feels that there's something in it. They pull out a pink and black ticket. They almost immediately drop it as Muffet's gasp startles them.

"Human? For me?" she asks before leaping into Aofil's arms again, "Thank you!"

Aofil struggles their arm out so that they can read the card.

"A romantic date for two as payment?" Mettaton asks, "Oh, Aofil darling, how sweet of you. And here I thought that you convincing me to call Muffet to make a buffet was so that I could get a good price for an order. Darling, you're such a tease."

His smug self congratulation fills the room like a thick blanket, but Mettaton marches through with no regards or care about it.

"Aofil also told me that you would want to look your best, and that they would too, and I happily agreed. You'll both be dining in the latest of MTT fashion overlooking the show."

"We just need to sign..." Aofil starts.

"You just need to sign these papers," Mettaton interrupts, presenting once again the stack of papers to Aofil, "It's just a non disclosure agreement, or in layman terms," he clicks the pen dragged out from his finger, "just a formality."