Hi to everyone who is still reading/reviewing! I managed to update fast again. Yeah! Maybe I bore you a little with all the "Phoebe-chapters" and flashback with Rebecca but I really want to show how Phoebe feels and that it's not easy to cope with loosing someone you love so much! I promise that there'll be more Sam-Brooke scenes! I did not forget Sam or any other character and I always appreciate if you tell me what you miss in a chapter or did (not) like!I wrote a longer update again (tell me if it's annoying to read too long ones!)
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may92: I am sorry to say it but I am happy that I made you cry ;). Yeah, I really wanted to show how fragile Phoebe is and I am glad you saw that. Phoebe finally has the family that cares for her and can start being a real kid and dealing with all her emotional pain.
A.R2914: I am happy that you loved it!
Othangles: I promise to write some Brooke-Sam interaction!I did not forget any character it was just a little hard adding scenes before Rebecca's date of death. But you'll see scenes soon, so please keep on reading! Thanks for your review!
Ace5492: You are wonderful my dear that you let me know that you thought of my chapter as wonderful ;)!
katie: I hope you are healthy again!If not: Get well soon!
forever-alwaysB-Davis: I hope you feel good and wish you a great sunday!
JustLikeBrookeDavis: I hope you still like this story!
xxxxxxxYour CaseyJr.
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Phoebe and Julian were healthy again but the next days were very hard for Phoebe and the others. Although Phoebe did not want to cry because of anything, she could not hold back her tears. Brooke and Julian had decided to take her to a therapist. It was hard seeing her suffering that much and they knew that a professional help would support them. At first Phoebe hated the idea of going to a therapist but after her third session, she found it okay and did not have a tantrum before each session.
Ben decided to stay for another three weeks and all of them were happy to hear that; especially to have him with them when Rebecca's day of death would come, was a good thing. But the time before Rebecca's death was horrible. Although Phoebe had opened up a little it was like now she was closing up totally again. She did not come at night into anybody's bed, nor did she want to be hugged and had an outburst about anything. They got to see a version of her that was definitely hard to deal with. Everybody knew the reason why she was like that and they talked to the therapist who told them that Phoebe was still blaming herself for her sister's death and had a huge aggression inside.
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One night Brooke cried in her room in Julian's arms, "I don't know how to deal with her Julian. I mean, she does not want anyone to touch her any more. She screams at us and…and I feel too much pity to punish her with anything. She went through so much that I don't want to add pain."
Julian could understand it perfectly. Since they knew about her past they somehow had problems punishing her and almost let her got through with anything. Whether it was staying up as long as Ben and Sam or something else. The therapist was worried about Phoebe's behavior and wanted to meet all of them the next day.
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"It is nice to meet you all.", Mrs. Benzo was sitting in front of them while everyone was on the couch. Phoebe still tried to calm down from a tantrum with tears in her eyes. Mrs. Benzo just let her be and started the talking.
"So this is your family Phoebe?", Mrs. Benzo asked nicely. Phoebe looked mad at her and rolled her eyes while the tears were still coming out of them because of her fury.
"No I brought a family that I've found on the streets. Of course it is! You already know that and don't ask me such dumb questions.", Mrs. Benzo had lot of those session with Phoebe where she was getting defensive and almost yelled at her.
"Can you tell me why you are so mad right now?", Brooke, Julian and Sam were holding hands and just listened while Sam wanted to hold Phoebe's hand too but she took it away. Sometimes no one could understand Phoebe and it was like she could change so fast.
"Because you made us all come today.", Phoebe said back and looked very furiously at her. If looks could kill, Mrs. Benzo would be dead right now.
"Do you know why I wanted them to come?", Mrs. Benzo was really nice and just wanted Phoebe to open up again. But it was not easy with Phoebe. Her feelings of guilt lay that deep inside her soul that telling her that it was not her fault, did not change anything.
"I don't really care.", Phoebe looked to the window and pretended not to be interested in anything.
Mrs. Benzo addressed Sam, Brooke and Julian with a smile and let her be, "It's really good to finally meet you all in one place. Phoebe told me a lot about you and I am happy that you could make it. I wanted you to come because I am worried about Phoebe." Phoebe rolled her eyes and went to another chair and just looked out of the window. It was sad that she was acting this way and pushing everyone far away from her but she could not handle her grief in any other way and it was the first time that people really tried helping her, which was good but also meant that she had to deal with Rebecca's death every day.
Mrs Benzo continued, "I heard that she acts differently lately and I would like you to tell me how exactly."
Brooke looked at Phoebe who had her back to them and just stared into they sky, "Well, she does not want us to hug her any more and she has many outbursts and destroys her own stuff or yells at us."
"How do you feel when she does it?"
"We feel helpless and we don't know what to do. We can feel that she is sad and feels alone but she won't let us help her any more and that makes us really sad as well.", Julian added.
"And yesterday she told me that everyone would be better without her and that she…she hates herself and Phoebe that is not true.", Sam said and had to suppress her tears, "I love you very much Phoebe and you are my little sister and I want you to know that I am there too to help you." Brooke squeezed Sam's hand. She was so proud of the young woman that was her daughter and sitting besides her.
"Could you come over to us Phoebe please?", Phoebe did not turn around but shook her head. The tears were already streaming down her face and she tried to wipe them with her hand. She missed Rebecca so much that she did not know what to do. It was not like she wanted to act the way she did lately but she could not stop her outbursts. She was just so mad that things like death happened to people and especially to Rebecca.
"Does Phoebe talk a lot about Rebecca lately?", Mrs. Benzo knew that this was a little fast but she needed Phoebe to open up a little.
"No. She told us about her but lately she does not really mention her. We are afraid that we will hurt her if we talk about her and…"
"Talking about her won't make her alive. So why don't you just take me to the orphanage and start having a happy, happy life. I don't even want to be happy so you might as well leave me alone.", she sat on a chair that was far away from everyone and crossed her arms in front of her.
Brooke, Sam and Julian were having tears in their eyes right now. They knew that Phoebe did not mean what she was saying but nevertheless those words hurt.
"Do you want to live in the orphanage Phoebe?"
"I don't care."
"Do you like it at home with them?", she pointed at Brooke, Julian and Sam. Phoebe did not answer and looked away.
"Would you give her to the orphanage?"
Julian immediately answered, "Never. We love you Phoebe. And you too Sam.", he took Sam's hand, who nodded. "No matter what; you are our daughters and all we want is you to be happy and…", he could not hold back his tears any more and stopped talking.
"Phoebe it breaks our hearts to see you suffering like that. All we want is to help you but…but if you push us away I don't know what we can do to help you.", Brooke answered and saw that Phoebe was crying as well. She did not make a sound but nevertheless her tears were coming out of her eyes.
"Could you please come to us Phoebe because I have a task for you all." Phoebe shook her head, "If you have already given up on your family Phoebe and you want to live in the orphanage, then there is nothing I can do for you. It makes me sad if you decide like this but it's your life and no one can force you to live with people you don't like."
Mrs. Benzo needed to be that hard now and could see that Phoebe looked shocked at her, "I see three people that care for you and obviously love you very much. It's okay if you don't love them. Nobody forces you to do so. I cannot look into your head. Maybe you've already decided that you don't want to live them because they care about you and want to know more about Rebecca and love you.", Phoebe sat still on the chair with a very fast heartbeat.
"I am sorry but we need to end this session.", they looked shocked at her but of course Mrs. Benzo knew Phoebe and how she would get through her, "I think Phoebe has already decided that it's better if all people leave her alone and I know that I cannot change her mind."
Brooke, Julian and Sam stood up and wanted to walk to the door but Phoebe jumped up and held it closed. Of course they knew that Phoebe would react this way and it broke their hearts to see her in so much emotional pain.
"No…no…don't go. I don't want to leave you…I…", she cried and fell to the floor but nevertheless she did not want to be touched.
Mrs. Benzo told them to sit down again and just let her be while she cried heavily on the floor. She went over to her and looked down at the broken girl, "Phoebe we need to know what is inside here.", she pointed at Phoebe's heart, "I can see that your whole family suffers because they feel helpless. They want to help you but if you don't let them help you, there is nothing they can do for you."
Phoebe had her head between her knees and tried to calm down but listened carefully to Mrs. Benzo. "You don't have to be alone with your thoughts. I know that there was no adult that was there for you in the past and that took care of you and I am very proud of you how you managed everything. I see strength in you that I would like to have too. And I know that you already let all those people, who are sitting here on the couch, into your heart. And do you know why they sit here? They sit here because they love you and want you to feel good."
Phoebe did not dare to look up but heard every word. "I am so proud of you because although you are a child you looked after yourself very well but now it's time that somebody else does it for you. And I know that you already allowed that but now it is time to really say "Yes, I want and I need my parents and sister."
Brooke, Julian and Sam listened carefully to every word and hoped that Phoebe would open up.
"Okay Phoebe here is the deal. If you want and think that you need parents, then nod. And if you think that those people who are sitting over there on the couch are the perfect ones; the ones you want and that have the strength to deal with you and Sam but more important if you want these people to help you and you want to feel happy again, then sit down on the couch with them and let them know that you need them. You don't have to say anything, just sit down over there.", Mrs. Benzo stood up again and sat down in front of the others.
Phoebe hesitated a moment but then went to the couch and sat down on the edge with a sad face. She could not look at them because she heard their sobbing and it was too painful.
"Okay Phoebe I have some questions for you. You can just nod. Do you like how you feel lately?"
Phoebe shook her head.
"Do you want to feel better?", Phoebe thought about Becca and guilt immediately consumed her mind but then she nodded.
"Do you know how to feel better?"
Phoebe shook her head again.
"Do you think that these people can help you to feel better?"
She nodded after a while.
"Do you trust them?"
She nodded again and Mrs. Benzo smiled."Okay, I want you to describe each other in just one word. Write one positive thing on this side and one negative at the other without using many words. Don't comment it. Just watch it. I need to get to know you all a little better."
She gave a card to each one.
"We start with Julian's negative sides."
Brooke held up "mother's boy." And smiled softly but could not look away from Phoebe who was hugging a stuffed animal tightly.
Sam held up "Does not trust me with boys"
And Phoebe held up a question mark.
Mrs. Benzo then asked what Julian had written, "Oh, I did not know that I should write one for me too."
Julian then held up his card for him and it said, "Worrying all the time."
"Okay, now Brooke's negative ones"
Julian's card said, "Always feeling guilty."
Sam's card said, "Doubts about being a good mother."
Phoebe's had a question mark again and Brooke's card said "short-tempered."
"Okay, thank you. Now Sam's negative sides."
Julian: "Hiding at times"
Brooke: "Pretends to be grown-up (sometimes)"
Phoebe: "?"
Sam: "Sometimes acts without thinking."
"Great. Now Phoebe's negative ones."
They all stopped a moment and did not know how this would affect Phoebe but then started writing.
Julian: "Short-tempered"
Brooke: "lone fighter."
Sam: "unpredictable"
They all thought that Phoebe had written another question mark but she did not.
Phoebe's sign showed, "Small"
Mrs. Benzo was glad that Phoebe had written anything and continued.
"Now Julian's good sides."
Brooke held up her card and it showed "Lovable."
Sam's showed "Interested" and Phoebe's showed "Not hitting." Julian's said "Caring"
Then it was time for his Brooke's positive side.
Julian: "Warm-hearted"
Sam: "Reliable"
Phoebe: "Motherly"
Brooke: "Caring"
Sam's positive sides came next:
Julian: "altruistic"
Brooke: "strong-minded"
Phoebe: "Cool"
Sam: "Cares about others"
Now it was time for Phoebe's positive ones.
Julian: "lovable"
Brooke: "caring"
Sam: "admirable"
Phoebe: "?"
"Well that went well. Now I got to know you all a bit better. But Phoebe you did not play along. I want you to fill in the question marks you had." Phoebe shook her head, she really did not want to talk right now.
"Do you think you can do this?", Mrs. Benzo asked nicely and Phoebe whispered a "yes" after a while.
"Okay, so tell me what you don't like about Julian."
Phoebe thought a moment but then shrugged her shoulders.
"So you are telling me that this guy over there is the most perfect man on the whole world?", Mrs. Benzo smiled at her and pointed at Julian, "So you tell me you never fight with any of them because they are too perfect?"
Phoebe looked at her and rested her head on the back of the couch and shook her head again.
"So you do fight with them?", Phoebe nodded her head. Of course she did.
"But you would not fight with people who are perfect, right? So tell me his bad side Phoebe. C'mon. Don't leave me hanging.", Phoebe smiled a little when Mrs. Benzo pleaded and then wrote a word on the card and showed it.
"Snores at night." The others had to laugh a little and were glad that Phoebe played along.
For Brooke it said, "Stopped drawing."
Sam's sign said, "gets to do more"
"Well that was not so hard, was it?", Mrs. Benzo asked and Phoebe shook her head.
"And now one positive for you."
Phoebe looked at the sign and really did not know what to write and her eyes got wet again because all the attention was on her and she could only think of Rebecca. That it had been her fault and how her father had told her that she would make everybody's life worse and that she was the devil in person. All of them could see her hesitation and it hurt them that Phoebe could not mention one positive side of her. There were so many and all of them could easily name them.
"Maybe it's easier you just pick one of the other's which you think suits you the best."
Mrs. Benzo held up the cards and Phoebe looked at them. Lovable, caring or admirable. She did not characterize herself with any of those, so she wrote one down and held it up.
It said "Intelligent."
Brooke and Julian realized what low self-esteem Phoebe obviously had and smiled at her but she did not look at them.
"Phoebe. Do you see what Sam, Brooke and Julian are doing at the moment?"
Phoebe looked to them and nodded, "They are holding hands."
"Don't you want that too?"
"I don't know."
"How about you just try it and if you don't like it, you can go back to your seat? How does that sound?", Phoebe looked at the three of them. All of them had a soft smile on their faces but nevertheless she hesitated.
"You told me that you liked cuddling with them, could you tell me why it changed?"
"I don't know.", Phoebe said honestly. She could not comprehend her own behavior at times.
"Okay, how about you really, really let adults choose what is best for you? Just try it and if you realize that you don't like it then no one will force you. How about you just sit down on Brooke's lap and look how it feels?"
Phoebe looked at Brooke and shook her head, "I know how it feels."
"Oh, sorry. I did not know that. Then how does it feel?"
"Okay.", Phoebe finally whispered.
"So if it feels okay, then why are you still sitting there alone?", Phoebe had trouble letting the tears in her eyes. Whenever she was happy she felt guilty that Rebecca would never have that.
"Is it because of Rebecca?", Mrs. Benzo already knew the answer but she needed her to open up. Phoebe's tears fell down her cheek and she had to look away. She had managed so well in the past to suppress all those feelings but suddenly they came back at once.
"Phoebe you told me that Rebecca knew everything about you and that you could tell each other's thoughts. And you also told me that Rebecca believed in angels and that you sometimes feel like she is still there. How do you think Rebecca would feel if she sees you that unhappy?"
Phoebe looked shocked at her and stayed mute for a while, "She would…she would…be unhappy too and…and want me to smile again but I don't know how.", she cried into her small hands and leaned back against the couch. The constantly crying exhausted her very much.
"It's okay not to know how Phoebe. And all of us can understand that you are sad but how about you just try. You don't have to do anything more than trying and trusting the people you love. I know that this is hard but you already managed so well lately, it would make us all sad if you give up now."
"But…but…what if I forget Rebecca if I am happy?", Phoebe whispered.
"You would never forget her Phoebe…you…"
"Yes I do. I don't know her smell any more and…I…", Phoebe cried into her hands again and kicked a chair in front of her that immediately fell to the ground.
"But you know what. If you think that you will forget her there is only one thing you can do.", Mrs. Benzo said again and gave Phoebe a paper and a pencil. Phoebe took it and did not understand what she wanted.
"You won't forget her if you start telling us about her. Tell us how she looked like, tell us what you loved about her, how you fought and everything that made her the person you love so much."
Phoebe looked shocked at Mrs. Benzo and then started drawing. No one had expected her to draw this good. It looked like a photo of Rebecca and showed every detail. Mrs. Benzo took the picture and was astonished how perfect it was.
"Phoebe. You have drawn so many details. I don't think that you have forgotten anything about that beautiful young girl. Phoebe I've heard that you are so lovable with Lisa. Can you tell me why?"
Phoebe did not understand her change of topic and mumbled, "Cause I like her and she is sweet and still so small."
"So you think that bigger people should help smaller ones?"
"Yes."
"You described yourself as small. Why don't you let anyone help you that is bigger than you are?", Phoebe looked a little mad at her.
"Lisa is small and young. When I said small as a negative side of me I meant my height. Nothing more.", of course she meant more.
"Okay. Come here and stand on the table.", Phoebe crossed her arms and did as she was told to although it annoyed her. She was shutting out everyone again and did not show her tears.
"Brooke, could you please stand up.", Brooke nodded and stood in front of Phoebe and looked up into those sad and empty eyes. It broke her heart to see her suffering like this.
"So now you're big Phoebe and Brooke is small. I know you always try to help smaller ones and it's a really good characteristic." Phoebe did not know what Mrs. Benzo wanted and just listened a little with her arms crossed.
"Brooke. Are you happy right now?"
Brooke hesitated a moment but then shook her head, "No, because I see my daughter in so much pain."
"What would make you happy?", Julian and Sam listened to every word and watched Brooke and Phoebe interacting.
"Um…if I could help Phoebe to get better."
"I really want to know what would make you happy not her. She is big and she knows how to take care of herself but you are smaller and maybe you need her. Do you need her?"
"Of course I do.", Brooke immediately answered and looked up at Phoebe, "I love her and I love having her in my arms or just seeing her."
"So a hug would help you?"
Brooke realized where this was going but it felt like she would push Phoebe and that was the last she wanted, "Um…yes, but she does not…"
"Would you fell better with a hug or not?", Brooke looked shocked at Mrs. Benzo and then nodded.
"So when Phoebe lies in your arms it's not only good for her but good for you too?", Brooke nodded again.
"Okay Phoebe. So you help smaller ones, right? Then I think you should know what you should do right now.", Mrs Benzo smiled up at her and Phoebe looked down at her with an open mouth.
"But she is not smaller than I am in reality.", Phoebe got mad and kicked down a pencil. Mrs. Benzo just ignored this behavior.
"I thought it's only about your height Phoebe. You are bigger than she is right now."
"But I am standing on a fucking table. That does not make me big.", Phoebe screamed back and hated that Mrs. Benzo could stay that calm.
"Okay. You just heard Brooke saying that she feels sad and would feel better if you hug her and you told me that it would feel okay. So could you stop arguing and just make her a little happier?"
Phoebe hesitated a moment, "Fine.", she slung her arms around Brooke and at first it felt like she was really forced but then her sobs started. Brooke could feel how suddenly all of her weight was on her body and how Phoebe hid her face in her shoulders.
"You can let go of her now.", Mrs. Benzo said and pulled her away but Phoebe held Brooke tight and started to cry heavily.
"Okay Phoebe. Do you want to let go of her now?", Phoebe shook her head and slung her legs around her waist and Brooke was glad to see her looking for comfort again. She sat down on the couch with her and caressed her back softly.
"Can you tell us why you are crying right now Phoebe?", Mrs. Benzo asked after half an hour when she was still on Brooke's lap and hiding her face.
"I miss Rebecca so much.", Phoebe whispered.
"Could you please look at me one moment?", Phoebe turned around and looked sadly at Mrs. Benzo. "Does it feel a little, only a tiny tiny bit better to share that sadness and letting someone hold you tight?", Phoebe hesitated but then nodded and hid in Brooke's chest again and let the tears fall down.
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Sam, Brooke and Julian were in the car and drove home. It had been a very hard day for all of them and when they came back home Ben looked a little shocked at their red eyes and wet faces. He then saw Phoebe still in Brooke's arms and was glad that Phoebe let someone touch her again. He went over to Sam and hugged her and both of them went outside to talk a little. Phoebe did not let go of Brooke for one second this day. She had to have her on her side the whole time.
"Can I stay up a little longer?", Phoebe asked this evening but Julian and Brooke knew that they were told to stay consistent even if they felt pity with her.
"No Phoebe. You have your bedtime."
"Please. It is really, really important.", Phoebe whispered and somehow they could feel that it was not a lie.
"How much longer?", Julian asked and Phoebe smiled a little, "Two hours."
"Make it one and it's okay. But just today."
Phoebe nodded and hugged him tightly, "Thanks", she went into her room and closed the door.
They did not know what she was doing but she forbid them to come inside. Sam and Ben knocked on the door a little later and opened it. They saw Phoebe lying on the floor sleeping with paint on her face and fingers. Then they looked at the big picture she had drawn. She had written "My Family."on it. The picture showed the five of them. Ben and Sam were holding hands and looked at each other. Hearts were painted around their heads. Brooke and Julian were standing besides them and holding hands as well while Phoebe was on Julian's shoulders with a smile as well but tears coming out of her eyes and she held up one of her hand into the sky. Her finger was touching an angel's finger that was sitting on a cloud and laughing happily besides a dog with wings. They looked exactly like Doodle and Rebecca and Rebecca was smiling with tears as well. There were other angels on some other clouds that looked like her grandpa and grandma. There were so many details in that picture and Ben and Sam were amazed by her talent. No one would ever believe that this picture was drawn by an eleven year old girl.
Ben shook Phoebe a little, "Hey pumpkin.", she opened her eyes and yawned and then looked at the picture very tired.
"That's amazing Phoebe. I love it.", Sam said honestly and Phoebe smiled a little and went closer towards Sam. She needed her and sometimes was afraid to loose her as well. Sam took her arms around Phoebe and just held her tight. Brooke and Julian came inside her room and were equally amazed.
"Could we frame it and hang it into the living room?", Julian asked and Phoebe nodded happily. He immediately took the picture and all of them stood in front of it and smiled.
"I love it.", Brooke had her hands on Phoebe's shoulder who yawned all the time. It was 11pm and way over her bedtime.
"I think it is time to go to bed.", Julian finally went through Phoebe's hair who shook her head and looked up at him with her puppy look. A puppy look that looked exactly like Brooke's.
"Please, just a little longer. I wanna..."
"No. It's too late.", Julian took her hand and pulled her to the bathroom. Brooke had to laugh when she heard the two of them arguing. She looked at the picture again and took her arm around Sam. She knew that in the end everything would be okay. She hugged Sam from behind and held her tight to herself. She was so proud of Sam. Sam had definitely grown in the last years.
"But I am not even tired.", they heard Phoebe complaining and went into her room. They saw how Julian took her over his shoulder and walked over to her bed and tucked her in. "Oh c'mon. Why am I always the one who has to go to bed first? Sam and Ben are up too.", she whined and crossed her arms. Sam, Ben and Brooke jumped into her bed and just stayed there and almost gave her no room to breath and pinned her under them.
"But I don't want to…", Phoebe continued and tried to get free but all of them answered her, "Sleep Phoebe!" The five of them stayed like this for a while until all of them were asleep but one person. She climbed out of the bed and looked at the picture again. It was sad looking at it but in the meantime it felt good. She looked up when she felt a hand on her shoulder.
"Becca would be very proud of you now.", he said and remembered the times when the two little girls sat in his room and asked him about anything.
"I love you Becca.", she said and turned around and let him carry her back to her room.
Both of them stayed outside for a while and just looked into it. Sam, Brooke and Julian were sleeping peacefully. Phoebe had her head on his shoulder and looked with a smile at them.
"They love you so much Phoebe.", Ben whispered. Phoebe just looked at them and found it cute how they all slept in her bed.
"How about shaking time?", Ben suggested and Phoebe looked smiling at him and nodded. Becca and Phoebe had always loved the shaking time at their house. They had danced with them for hours to funny music. Ben took Phoebe into Sam's room and closed the door. He turned on the music and started dancing funnily. "Hey, don't laugh at me. Dance with me pumpkin.", she jumped into his arms and both of them smiled happily and remembered the good old times. Brooke, Julian and Sam peeked into the room and watched the cute scene. After a while Ben and Phoebe went to the window and looked up to the stars. He had his arms around her and was amazed by the stars' beauty.
"What do you think they are Ben?"
"The stars?", Ben asked and Phoebe nodded.
"Well, you know what the books tell you. They are energy far far away from us. And although one star may not exist any more, we still see its light."
Phoebe listened to him carefully. Ben was always the one Becca and her had asked when it came to questions they had not been able to answer.
"But in my mind stars are sleeping angels."
Phoebe nodded and went a little closer to him, "Sleep tight Becca.", she whispered into the night and closed her eyes as well. They stayed like this for a while and even when Phoebe fell asleep he just held her in his arms and looked up as well. A tear fell down his cheek, "Don't worry Becca. I take care of your silly one."
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Twelve year old Ben walked to his laughing cousins. They were lying in the grass with lipstick on their mouths and told each other how their prince would look one day. "Hey Ben.", Rebecca jumped up and hugged him tight. She was such a sweet girl. Always caring for others and trying to help.
"Ben look. We are fine women.", Phoebe pointed at her mouth and Ben laughed.
"I can see that.", he sat down in the grass as well and threw a stone into the sea.
"I wonder who you will marry one day Ben.", Becca looked at Ben who rolled his eyes.
"Are you talking about your princes again?"
"Well Becca will marry someone who is very nice and pretty and has horses and I will marry you."
"You cannot marry me Phoebe.", Ben said and looked at her blue eye. He hated that his uncle was always that aggressive towards her and that there was nothing he could do about it.
"Why not?", she asked a little sad.
"Cousins don't marry.", he went through her hair with his hands.
"But I don't want anybody else to marry you.", Phoebe whined.
"Maybe Ben will find a princess you like Phoebe.", Becca suggested but Phoebe shook her head.
"Nooo. I don't want him to have any princess."
"Right, you must always take care of us Ben.", Becca said and kissed his cheek and smiled when she saw the lipstick on his cheek.
"I don't need anyone to take care of me.", Phoebe protested and threw a stone as well, "I can take care of myself."
"But I take care of you Phoebe.", Rebecca protested this time.
Phoebe rolled her eyes and let herself fall on top of Rebecca, "That's different. You are my Becca and we are sisters forever."
Rebecca pushed her down and whispered something into his ears.
"Hey, no fair.", Phoebe tried to understand what they were saying.
He whispered back, "Don't worry Becca. I'll take care of your silly one forever as well."
Becca nodded and looked up to her sister with a wide smile.
"I hate when you do that. What did you tell him?"
"Oh just that he should take care of you too when I am not there.", Rebecca never lied to Phoebe and Phoebe rolled her eyes.
"You are always there."
"Nope. Sometimes I am at school or at the dentist."
"I won't cry if you're away for some hours, as long as you come back. I am not a baby Becca."
"Yeah but you look so tiny, tiny, tiny.", she tackled her to the ground and tickled her merciless.
"I may be tiny but I am not the one who is afraid of everything."
"I am noooot.", Becca whined and crossed her arms while Ben had to laugh. It was the cutest thing when the two of them were arguing.
"Yes you are and that's why you need me. Cause I am the brave Phoebe that can save you from anything. Boom. Boom.", she played gangster again and Becca smiled.
"Okay fine. You are tiny but brave."
"Yup. And you are big but a coward."
"I am not a coward."
"Sure. My favorite coward on the whole wide world.", Phoebe hugged her from behind and tickled her as well.
"Phoebe! There is a spider in your face.", Ben joked. Phoebe immediately jumped up screaming, "Get it off of me. Get it off."
Becca and Ben just laughed at her and finally she looked mad at them. "I was not afraid…I…"
"Yeah, yeah. Whatever pumpkin. Just admit it. You need me to save you too.", Becca smiled and Phoebe slumped down to the ground.
"Fine. I need you too to save me. But you need me more because I am braver than you are."
"I think both of you are cowards.", Ben looked at the shocked faces and grinned. "Cause neither of you can get away from the big, big tickling monster."
"Nooooo Ben.", Becca pointed at him and jumped up and ran away. Phoebe did the same but as usual Ben was faster. He took Phoebe over his shoulder and ran after Becca. Phoebe was not heavy so it was easy to run with her after Becca. He caught her and finally pinned down both girls under him and started to tickle them merciless.
"Noooo.", they laughed and tried to get free but their cousin was way stronger and loved to tease them.
"Say it.", he grinned down at them.
"Nope.", Phoebe said first and he tickled them again and said it again.
"Say it"
Becca was the first one to say it, "You are our superhero."
"Very good, now you Phoebe.", Phoebe laughed and shook her head. He immediately tickled her neck again and did not let go of her.
"Say it."
"You are our superhero", she finally said and jumped up and screamed, "Noooooot."
He ran after them again. They did not need to tell him that they admired him but he loved teasing them and spending time with those two giggly girls.
xxxxx
"You - you alone will have the stars as no one else has them...In one of the stars I shall be living. In one of them I shall be laughing. And so it will be as if all the stars were laughing, when you look at the sky at night...You - only you - will have stars that can laugh."
-Antoine de Saint-Exupery in The Little Prince