A/N: Hey, back already! Two updates in two days, it's crazy! But I feel bad about the long break before last chapter and I was feeling really inspired with this one so I kept going. I think it's mostly that I can't stand leaving Brittana in all that turmoil. It's got to get a little worse before it gets better, but they'll be better off for it in the end. :-)
Thanks so much again for all the reviews/alerts/favorites. They really make me want to keep going with this! As always, hope you guys enjoy!
"Santana, we're going out to the sushi place down the block to grab dinner, do you want to come?" Rachel asked, sitting on the love seat next to the couch where Santana had taken up permanent residence over the past day.
"No thanks." she said unaffectedly, as she flicked channels.
"It's a beautiful day out. It's going to start getting colder this week, you should get out." she said gently and Santana turned to snap at her on instinct but something made her think twice.
"I need to talk to Brittany when she gets in." Santana, said turning to the TV. "Assuming she decides to come home today."
"She texted us all and said she'd be at her friend's, I think she just didn't want to say something she'd regret after she'd been drinking." Santana nodded uninterestedly.
"Guess so."
"Santana, do you want to talk about it?" Rachel said. "Because we can...talk." she offered.
"Remember how I told you to leave it alone Berry?" Rachel nodded. ".alone."
"Well the offer is always open." she said, getting up and heading towards her room. "Do you want us to bring you back something?" she asked, putting her coat on as Finn joined her and put on his own.
"Nah, I'm good." she said. "Not hungry."
"Okay, we'll be back in an hour or so." Santana just shrugged at the information and continued to not really watch the TV that was on in front of her.
After an hour or so it was 7:30 and Santana was still home alone and starting to get angry. Maybe Brittany really didn't plan on coming home again and here she was sitting on the couch. She was starting to feel like a fool. As she pondered that she looked over when she heard the click of the locks on the front door and heard the laughter of Finn, Rachel, and her missing girlfriend as they entered the apartment.
"Hey." Rachel smiled politely, suddenly feeling uncomfortable.
"Hey." Santana said, before looking down. Brittany focused on her before kicking softly at the ground and staring at her own feet.
"Finn, let's go watch a movie inside." Rachel said, shoving him in the direction of their room and Brittany looked at her with thankful eyes.
"But we were going to watch TV on the couch and eat popcorn." he said obliviously with a pout, before she elbowed him and motioned towards Santana with her eyes. "Ow! Oh, right yeah...I forgot...that...movie...right..." She sighed, ushering him into their room, but leaving the door open just a crack, unable to tame her curious nature.
"Hi." Brittany said, dropping her bags as she headed over to the couch and sat facing Santana.
"Nice to see you still live here." Santana said, flicking through channels as she pretended not to care.
"Santana," Brittany started and grabbed her hand.
"Don't." Santana warned, shrugging her off. Brittany responded by grabbing the remote and turning off the TV in one swift motion. "What the hell?" she said with anger.
"We need to talk."
"Oh," Santana said, voice dripping with sarcasm, "I get it. Now we need to talk. Now that you want to talk, it's finally time to talk."
"It's not like that." Brittany said.
"Funny, that's what it feels like. I'm the one who always gets told that I shut you out and run away from problems, yet you did exactly the same thing for the past day and a half."
"You were gone before I even woke up yesterday." Brittany defended.
"I had to study." Brittany looked at her with clearly disbelieving eyes. "Whatever, don't believe me. I don't care."
"About what?" Brittany challenged.
"Anything. Do whatever you want." she shrugged indifferently. "I mean it's clear you don't care anymore, so why the hell should I?"
"So that's it, you're just going to ignore it and let our relationship completely fall apart."
"No, I'm just not going to bend to your every desire from now on. Right now, I don't want to talk. Maybe I did an hour ago, you know, when you were supposed to be home. You clearly decided that hanging out with Finn and Rachel was more important than solving our problems. It's really great that you have your priorities straight. From now on I will too."
"I was walking home from work and I saw them at the sushi place. They had just sat down and asked if I wanted to eat. I was starving." she said evenly.
"And I was sitting here waiting for you. Like an idiot. And you just did whatever you wanted once again."
"What's so wrong with doing what I want?" Santana shook her head.
"What about us?"
"I didn't think 45 minutes was going to make or break this discussion."
"Yeah, well maybe you thought wrong."
"You're being so childish right now." Santana just laughed and shook her head.
"Because you running away yesterday was a stunning example of maturity."
"I needed some time to clear my head. In all of my time being with you – friends or girlfriends – I've never, ever been as angry with you as I was on Friday night. What were you even thinking?"
"I'm not even going to answer that question, because you know what I was thinking. And you knew exactly how I'd react to what was happening. Yet you fed right into that situation."
"First of all, I was obviously mistaken because I thought that you could handle sitting with me at work and accept that while people may hit on me, I'm not remotely interested in them."
"You flirt right back."
"How many times do we have to go over this? It's like a broken CD."
"Record."
"Whatever. I'm not flirting. I'm not doing anything to show that I'm actually interested. You know why? Because I'm not." she said firmly. "I'm being polite, smiling, and pretending that I don't think they're total assholes. I give them drinks, take their money and if they give me any trouble, call over Rick and have him deal with it."
"You've always been a flirt Brittany. And with your history-" Brittany's eyes widened.
"Don't you dare go there Santana. Don't even try." Santana shrunk back a little, feeling guilty. "That's really low. I have never and would never cheat on you." she said her voice full of hurt.
"Where were you last night?"
"After we went to the club I crashed at Stacey's place." she shrugged. "I told you that."
"You just not coming home? I'm not okay with that. I don't know Stacey. I don't know any of your friends. How do you think I feel about you suddenly spending the night with them? How do I know she's not trying to get you in bed too." Brittany laughed. "You think that's funny?"
"I think it's funny because she's the straightest girl I've ever met and she has been with her boyfriend for 2 years." Santana shrugged her off once more. "Whatever, give me a little credit Santana. I deserve it. I can't do this with you if you're not going to trust me. I can't live here with you and go to school, have a job and friends if you're going to question every single thing I do." she said, frustration growing.
"Since you started school I don't even know who you are Brittany." Santana said. "For the past two weeks I've spent more one on one time with Berry or Hudson than you. I've spent more time alone than all of that combined. How do you think that makes me feel? Have you stopped for one minute to consider my feelings at all? Or are you just content to move on and build a life around things I'm not involved in."
"You won't let yourself be involved!" Brittany yelled. "I invited you out with my friends – you weren't interested. I asked you to come sit with me at work – you got kicked out for fighting with some jerkoffs who we'll probably never see again. Then you run away and take off to drink alone and you're gone the next morning before I even wake up!"
"Like you would have wanted to talk anyway."
"It's not the point! You need to grow up Santana, because I'm not going to spend my entire life in your little world of self pity."
"Excuse me?"
"All you do is sit here and feel sorry for yourself. You want me to spend my entire life making every decision for you. Not for me, for you. It's not fair. I'm 18 years old and living in one of the biggest cities in the world. I want to experience things. I want to make new friends and have fun and most of all I want to do all of that with you. Because I love you. But you just want to pretend we're still in high school and have it be me and you against everyone."
"Because that's how it's supposed to be."
"That's not how it needs to be! Not anymore!" Brittany said. "You've been in school for two weeks and you haven't made one friend. Not once have you mentioned anyone you've even gotten a cup of coffee with. You're depending on me for everything and your angry that I'm moving forward and the stress of it is absolutely exhausting!" She said, standing.
"I can't believe how selfish you sound right now!" Santana said, standing up to meet her.
"How selfish I sound? Me?" Brittany scoffed. "You're kidding, right? How selfish do you sound? You want me to put my life on hold to sit here and babysit you."
"You moved here with me. We moved here together, to be with each other. I put up with an unholy amount of shit from my parents to make this happen. We were in this to be with each other and the first second you got a taste of something else you left me behind without a second glance. How do you think that makes me feel?" Brittany just shook her head and let out a breath.
"I'm not leaving you behind. We live together. We see each other all the time."
"Don't even start with that bullshit line. We sleep in the same bed, but in the past two weeks, we've barely spent any quality time together." Santana said and Brittany rolled her eyes.
"It's two weeks. School and work just started, you're overreacting."
"I'm happy you made friends and that you're happy with your job and with school. But I'm sorry, right now?" She shrugged. "I'm miserable."
"Why are you so stubborn? Why can't you just see that this is something I need right now? It has nothing to do with us."
"That's exactly the problem. What does have to do with us anymore? Where are we?"
"I can't." Brittany said, gripping her head in frustration. "You are the most frustrating person to talk to – ever! I feel like Lord Tubbington when he chases his tail in circles. You don't understand anything I'm trying to say."
"Oh trust me, I get it. Neither do you." Santana shook her head.
"I can't believe we haven't even been here for a month and we're already fighting."
"Yeah well, clearly we had no idea what we were getting into." Santana shot.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Dating in high school and trying to live together in the real world are clearly totally different things and maybe we were really good at one, but we're clearly a failure at the other." She said with venom in her voice.
"You don't mean that." Brittany said, swallowing.
"Don't tell me what I mean." Santana said, walking past her to the kitchen.
"What are you saying?" Brittany followed her, raising her voice.
"I'm saying that right now, you're not someone I want to be around, so I'm not to happy I'm stuck in a confined space with you!" she snapped, shocking even herself. Brittany just nodded.
"So you don't want to talk about this? To fix this?"
"Right now I don't even know what there is to fix." she shrugged.
"Right, well if that's how you feel." Brittany said softly. "I'm going to go study for tomorrow. You have a good night." she said, before turning and walking into the bedroom, shutting the door behind her. Santana just sighed and dropped her head into her hands on the counter.
"Fuck!" she cursed to herself as she sighed, a tear falling down her cheek. "Why can't you ever bite your fucking tongue?" she chastised.
Brittany settled herself into her bedroom in tears, poured down her face the minute she closed the door. She laid down in the bed, clutching the pillow to herself as she let herself fall asleep.
"This is bad." Finn said, sitting on the bed, where him and Rachel had heard the better part of the conversation.
"Really bad."
"This doesn't have the same feel without Santana and Brittany." Rachel said, shuffling through the avenue on Finn's arm. "I mean the idea was for all 4 of us to have a date night once a week."
"Well, at least we get a date night out of it. And some time out of that house." he sighed. "The last few days have been a nightmare."
"Yes, the cold war between Brittany and Santana is quite uncomfortable. Plust the fact that Santana has taken up residence in the living room is quite challenging as well."
"Yeah..."
"The apartment looks like a disaster and they won't even look at each other when they're in the same room, let alone speak to each other. They're acting like total children. I thought maybe date night would be an opportunity to ease tension."
"Rachel, no offense, but no way in hell do I want to be a on a double date with Brittany and Santana right now." she frowned.
"True." she sighed. "I can't take living like this anymore. And honestly, I hate seeing them both so miserable. As much as neither will admit it, they both clearly can't stand not being on good terms with each other." she stopped walking and turned to Finn. "What if we fix it?" He furrowed his brow and looked skeptical.
"Don't you think maybe it's not our place to be involved?" he said gently. "I mean it's none of our business."
"None of our business? Finn! We live with them, it's most definitely our business." she said. "If I have to hear one more time about Santana stealing Brittany's food or sit in the living room in silence while they pretend not to sneak glances at each other I'm going to completely lose my mind!" He sighed.
"Well what do you want to do?"
"I don't know." she said, continuing to walk as she surveyed their options. "Maybe we should split up and talk to them separately. We can try and convince them to talk to each other and work things out. Maybe we can try and get one of them to apologize first."
"I guess." he said. "I mean I want them to help, I just don't want onto overstep, but you're right. We can team up and try to talk to them." I can stop by the bar tomorrow night and talk to Brittany."
"Wait, what?"
"I said tomorrow after work, I'll stop by and see Brittany at the bar."
"No, no. I'm going to talk to Brittany."
"What? No way! Brittany and I have become kinda friends since we moved here. I'm taking Brittany, you take Santana."
"I will absolutely not take Santana. She despises me. You two play video games together. You should talk to her."
"That was like twice!" he said. "I can't talk to Santana! She's clearly in a deep depression and she's totally full of rage. Her mood swings are out of control. The other day I was getting a snack and I saw her playing xbox and cursed someone out on the mic after she shot them and then burst into tears about it."
"All the more reason I should not talk to her. She is capable of snapping at any moment. She might just finally lose it and kill me."
"No way Rachel. I'm down with your plan, but not this part. She's in a fragile place. She needs another girl to talk to. I'm not handling Santana."
"That's extremely sexist Finn. There is no reason why you aren't just as capable of speaking to Santana. In fact, you're selling yourself short. You're a sensitive guy and you've helped me through many issues throughout the years. What are you saying, that you don't know how to talk to girls?"
"What? No! That's not what I said. I just...I said I couldn't talk to Santana because she clearly needs to discuss emotional issues."
"So you're saying you're incapable of handling emotion."
"No! Wait, what?"
"You're telling me that you're unable to hold emotional conversations with women. Maybe you're not ready to be in a serious relationship after all Finn. I thought you'd grown up. Clearly you're still an emotionally stunted high school boy who is afraid of the women in his life."
"I am not! I'm totally capable of having a conversation with women. In fact, I'm extremely sensitive and in touch with my emotions."
"Which is precisely why you should be the one to talk to Santana!" she siad with exasperation.
"Right!"
"Right! Great, it's settled then! I'll talk to Brittany, you talk to Santana." she said with a smile. "Come on, we're here!" she said taking off towards the box office of the movie theater and leaving Finn to ponder what just happened.
"Wait...what?" he said. "Damnit! How does this always happen to me?"
Finn walked into the house on Thursday evening and shrugged off his coat. He was glad to see Santana sitting on the couch in her pajamas, since he and Rachel had agreed to take this opportunity to split up and talk to the girls separately.
"Hey Santana." He said, standing against the back of the love seat. "How are you?" he said and she looked up at him with an expression he couldn't quite place. He swallowed hard, half expecting for her to lunge across the couch and attack him. "I...sorry to..." he started but soon saw her face contort as she burst into uncontrollable tears. "Oh God." he said.
"How could he even do it?" she wailed, throwing her hands in the air and speaking incoherently.
"Wha-...I...um" he said rocking on his feet awkwardly, not knowing exactly how he should proceed. "Um..." he said sitting on the opposite end of the sofa and reaching over to pat her back awkwardly. "It's going to be okay."
"But it's not! He's known then forever Finn! Forever! He's spent his whole life and childhood with them and he's just going to leave them behind without even a second thought." Finn furrowed his brown in confusion and looked around, unsure of what she was talking about.
"Um...who?" he asked carefully.
"Andy!" she screamed as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. She motioned towards the TV where the credits to Toy Story 3 rolled. "He doesn't care about all the memories and all the time he spent with them, he's just ready to move on, go to college, and dump all of the toys that he used to care so much about. In a couple weeks he'll be out partying with his new special dancer friends and he won't even remember Woody ever existed!" she said, collapsing into him in tears. "He won't even remember when Woody was his entire world!"
"I-" Finn started, unsure of where to start. "I don't think Andy has new dancer friends." he said slowly.
"You should watch out too Finn. Pretty soon she won't need the T-Rex or the midget little green alien either." she said, lifting her head up and sniffling. "I mean if Woody isn't safe, no one is." He thought for a moment putting all of the pieces together.
"Santana...I don't think that Brittany is going to toss you out like a toy." he said carefully, still patting her back awkwardly.
"What the fuck do you know?" she said popping up in anger, swiping at her tears.
"Uh-oh."
"You think you know anything about my relationship Lurch? You have no idea – absolutely no idea about what Brittany and I have."
"I just...but"
"But nothing! You and the leprechaun barely held it together through high school so excuse me if I don't want to take relationship advice from a failure like you!" she yelled and he frowned, about to respond before he saw that she looked like she was going to break into tears again.
"Whoa! Wait, Santana, just...maybe...do you wanna play some Call of Duty?" he offered cautiously, doing his best to diffuse the situation before he was in even bigger trouble. She considered for a moment.
"Okay." she said with a whimper. "I'll go grab us some beers." she said with a sniffle as she walked towards the kitchen and he fell back against the couch sighing heavily.
"I'm a total failure." he muttered. "Why can I never win with women? Why do the always own me?" he said, shaking his head before getting up to turn the game on.
"Rach, we talk and we don't get anywhere." Brittany said, refilling the diet soda in Rachel's glass. "It's like we are both speaking different languages...except we're both speaking English...I think." Brittany trailed.
"Brittany, I get it." Rachel said, quickly, before Brittany could get lost in her own thoughts. "Trust me, no one knows better than me how difficult relationships can be, but you and Santana, you guys are like each others other halves. You can't just give up."
"I am not giving up." Brittany said pointedly.
"Well you certainly have a funny way of showing it."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means that you're pulling away and doing exactly what you get mad about Santana doing all the time. You're not trying. For the past few days you have done nothing but ignore each other and play silly games."
"I am not playing silly games. I'm not the one stealing food and deleting everything that she records on the DVR." Rachel sighed.
"That's not the point Brittany. The point is, you've made no effort to talk to her. Put yourself in her shoes for a minute. We've talked about this before. You know how insecure she can be. She's scared and she's using her normal defense mechanism and I get that it's tiring, but you're not being fair either."
"How so?"
"You know how you've been wrong. You're just trying to take the Santana approach yourself. She's stubborn Brittany and she's not going to come around and you're going to end up letting your relationship falling apart over something that if you both discussed reasonably and came to a compromise on wouldn't even be an issue." Rachel said. Brittany sighed.
"You're both in pain Brittany." she said. "And it's painful to watch. She's a shell of herself. She sits on that couch and watches TV and plays video games and cries and yells at people. She's a mess and I'm pretty sure that you're not really much better, but you just have a room with a door and do a better job of hiding it." she said sternly. "I don't mean to be harsh, but I think it's time for you to be the bigger person and realize that you made a lot of mistakes here too. Her mistakes may be more glaring, but yours exist as well. And I think if you talked again you'd find she's willing to admit hers, but she won't be the first to do so."
"Rach, sometimes it just feels like I always have to be the bigger person." she said. "I just wish for once she could be the bigger person."
"I know and I get that, trust me. But Brittany, she's not ready to do that, not yet. I'm sure one day she will. Santana's showed a lot of maturity since the move, but with this, I don't think she's there yet. For now, if you want to make your relationship work, you're going to have to do this, at least one more time. You know you haven't been fair to her either." Rachel said, eying her and Brittany averted her eyes. "It's great you have new friends and a job but you need to remember to keep a balance."
"I guess I did get a little wrapped up." Brittany admitted, fiddling with a rag as Rachel put a hand over hers and squeezed, causing her to look up.
"It's okay Brittany, it happens to everyone. But instead of worrying about who apologizes first, focus on fixing the issue, because in the end that's just being petty." Brittany furrowed her brow.
"What's wrong with looking good?"
"What?" Rachel asked confused.
"You said that's being pretty."
"Petty, I said petty...you know worrying about silly things."
"Oh!" Brittany smiled. "Right." she sighed in resignation. "She's the most frustrating woman on the planet sometimes."
"But..." Rachel asked with a smile.
"But I love her." Brittany said with a roll of her eyes and a silly smile. "If I talk to someone about switching shifts tomorrow can you guys like...maybe give us some privacy?" she asked hopefully.
"We'd love to." Rachel said happily.
"Awesome." she laughed. "Where's Finn now?" Rachel giggled and looked guilty.
"He's having the same conversation with Santana." Brittany looked at her and burst out laughing. "What?"
"And you're not concerned for his safety?" Rachel frowned as she stood.
"I better go check on that."
Santana turned the key in the door cursing Rachel for the fact that it was 6:30 and Rachel had kept her out shopping for over 2 hours.
"Didn't even buy anything, damn pain in my ass." she muttered as she opened the door and tossed her keys on the table, freezing when she saw that the living room was spotless, all of her things apparently put away and the room lit softly by candles and dim lights, soft music playing in the background. "Hudson I swear if you let me walk into some romantic trap you set for Ber-" she said freezing when Brittany appeared from the kitchen. She looked around and swallowed. "Hey."
"Hey." Brittany said softly with a small smile. "I hope you don't mind, I cleaned up a bit. It was getting crazy in here." she said, motioning towards the living room.
"It's fine." Santana said dismissively and furrowed her brow. "Aren't you heading to work?"
"Actually, I swapped shifts with someone for Sunday night."
"Do you have plans or something?"
"I was hoping maybe we could talk." she said tentatively.
"About what?" she asked, feigning obliviousness but Brittany looked at her knowingly.
"San..." Santana just sighed.
"You really took off from your big important bartending job just to talk to me?" she asked and Brittany nodded.
"Yeah." she said, taking a step forward and looking her straight in the eye. "I miss you. A lot." she said, grabbing her hand. Santana swallowed back a tear and nodded.
"I miss you too." she said quietly.
"Come on." she said, nodding towards the sofa and pulling her so they could sit facing each other.
"Santana, I'm sorry." Brittany said immediately. "The last few weeks, last week especially have been horrible and a lot of it is my fault. I'm really sorry that I tried to push all of the blame on you. I got really mad at you the other night. What happened at the bar-"
"What happened at the bar was a disaster." Santana said. "I lost control. I let everything that was bothering me for the past couple of weeks get to me and I totally lost it."
"It wasn't cool." Brittany said.
"I know that. And I swear I will never lose it about something like that again. I completely overreacted." she said honestly. "I'm sorry I almost cost you your job. I know you really like working there and even though I have my issues with it, I need to come to terms with them and learn how to handle myself better. I have to learn how to trust you better."
"It was really embarrassing for me." she shrugged. "I wasn't even there a week and I had no idea what was going to happen. Plus, Santana, more important than anything, you could have gotten hurt. Those were 3 big guys you took on. I know you like to think you can beat the crap out of like an entire football team, but that was scary and I can't have you putting yourself in danger like that."
"I was protecting you." Santana said with a sigh of frustration. "I...I couldn't just stand there and hear them talk shit about you. And I know I shouldn't have started getting physical, but Brittany, I love you and I couldn't just sit there and let you be disrespected." Brittany smiled and grabbed her hand, squeezing it.
"I get it San, and I love you for that." she said. "But those guys? They don't even matter. They're nothing in our life. They don't have anything to do with us. Let them say whatever they want. The only thing I care about is what you have to say, okay? People are always going to talk...let them talk, it means nothing. Don't put yourself in danger because of it, because if you got hurt, I would be...devastated."
"Yeah?"
"Of course. Santana?" she asked in disbelief. "I'd go crazy if anything happened to you." She shook her head. "Look the fight sucked, but let's be honest. It's not the real problem."
"You and I, we're just...we're not on the same page right now and it's troubling because we're always on the same page." Santana said.
"San, I don't know what to say. I'm not trying to be on a different page form you I just...I'm trying to experience college life and the city...trying to have fun."
"Fun that I'm not a part of."
"I invited you out with us on Saturday."
"That's not my place."
"How is it not your place when you're going with me?" Brittany asked with frustration. "Maybe you'll like them too. Maybe we can all be friends. How will you ever know if you don't even try?"
"Britt."
"You're so closed minded!" she said with exasperation. "It's like the most frustrating thing to handle!"
"I'm not closed minded I just...meeting new people is hard for me. And I don't feel like I need new people. I just...I just need you." Brittany sighed.
"Santana when it comes down to what I actually need, I just need you too. But when it comes to what I want? I want to make friends and go out and try new places and new things. I want you to be part of all of those things. And I'm really sorry if I did anything in all of this to make you feel like you weren't."
"That's not it...it's just...Brittany I feel like you're going to go out and see all of these new things and meet all of these new people and you're going to realize that you can do so much better than some bitchy girl from Lima." she said with tears in her eyes.
"San...are you kidding me?" she asked in disbelief, pulling her closer and swiping at a her tears with her thumbs. "You know that I totally adore you. I could never in a million years do better than you, because you are the greatest, most awesome, perfect person I've ever met and I love you more than anything. You're smart and hot and funny and you know how to do everything to make me happy. No one makes me happier than you." she said. "Did I mention your hot?" she asked with a smile and Santana couldn't help but laugh through her tears.
"Sometimes I think you underestimate how amazing you are. You're in this huge city will millions of people and there are going to be so many of them that want you and-"
"Santana stop." Brittany laughed. "It doesn't matter. Let them, because you know all I want? You." Brittany frowned. "I'm really sorry that I ever made you feel differently, because that means I'm not doing a good job being your girlfriend."
"You do a great job...but you're right...I guess I don't know how to share." Brittany laughed.
"Listen, we have to figure this out, okay? I don't really think it's that hard, which is good because if we can't figure this out, I'm going to lose my mind. I don't think I can sleep in that bed one more night in that bed without you. You're PJs are not enough." Santana laughed out loud and sighed in relief.
"I was really scared that you didn't want to fix it."
"Me? You're the one who said you thought this might be a mistake." Santana closed her eyes.
"I didn't mean that...I get so mad and...I really have to learn to control what I say when I lose my temper."
"I'm telling you, count to 10." Santana sighed. "Listen, when school is on this schedule is crazy. It's harder than I thought. Let's just promise to make us time okay?" Santana nodded.
"That sounds good."
"I got a little carried away with my new friends." she rolled her eyes. "I guess that happens, but I'm sorry. You're first, and I don't ever want to make you think that's not true again. I just get wrapped up in things and lost and you know...I let us fall behind. That will never happen again."
"Promise?"
"Promise." Brittany smiled. "But I need you to make some too, okay?" she asked and Santana sighed.
"San." she whined.
"I know, I know. Look, I promise I'll come meet your friends okay? And I won't be all...Santana moody. I swear." Brittany smiled. "I'm sure they're great."
"I actually think you could really like them if you gave them a try."
"Well if you like them they can't be that bad I guess."
"But one more thing San."
"I know, I promise that I'll apologize to everyone at the bar and I'll never pull a stunt like that again. Ever." Brittany laughed.
"Not that, but good, because you need to do all that too."
"Then what?" Santana asked confused.
"There are going to be times now and then where maybe I hang out with my friends and you don't want to come or I'm stuck at work and you're sitting home. I want you to promise you'll try and find something too. I want you to find something – a job, friends, a hobby, whatever. Can you try? For me?" Santana looked unsure.
"I'm not good at that shit Britt, you know that."
"Listen, I'm not saying you need to go crazy but, just don't be so put off by every opportunity. Let it come to you naturally. Just stop pushing everything and everyone away all the time." she said. "Don't be grumpy Santana who hates new people and new things all the time." she laughed.
"I'll try." Santana said, nodding and Brittany smiled wide.
"I love you." she said. "I love you so much. Let's try and not let that happen again okay?"
"Yeah." Santana smiled. "I'd be totally down with never doing any of that again. Plus this couch? Not as comfortable as it looks to sleep on." she said and Brittany laughed. "I love you too."
"It's been like," Brittany said looking up and pretending to think hard, "way too many days since I kissed you."
"We should fix that." Santana said, leaning forward to capture Brittany's lips with her own. What started out soft and sweet and soon turned heated and after about ten minutes Santana sprung from the couch a few minutes later when the bell rang. "What the fuck?" she yelled and Brittany laughed.
"Oh yeah, I ordered dinner from your favorite place!" she said, throwing Santana her t-shirt and bra. "I thought we could just chill out and have dinner and some wine and catch up and stuff?" she buzzed the bell and tossed her own shirt back over her head.
"That sounds perfect." Santana smiled and pulled her close kissing her once more and forgetting all about the food until there was knocking on the door. "Ugh," she kissed her quickly, "I'll go get the plates, you go get the food."
"San." she said pulling her back.
"Yeah?"
"I'm really glad we talked and stuff. I mean, I know we probably still have some details to work out and we're not totally in the clear, but I'm just glad we're back." she smiled.
"Me too, baby." she said, pulling her into a tight hug. "I'm relieved. I thought I lost you for a while there." Brittany shook her head hard.
"Never." she said, kissing her once more as there was pounding on the door once more.
"Damnit," she groaned, "more later. Lots and lots more. But for now, you get the door." Santana laughed as she headed off towards the kitchen.