As this story begins to wind down, I'd like to thank everyone who has followed it and especially reviewed to help me keep going! There are still several chapters to come, including plenty of fluff to help heal the hearts I stomped on. Believe me, it gets better for Evelyn! OK, maybe not this chapter. But SOON!

June 19, 1945

The days continued to pass, but Evelyn wasn't sure if that was really true. It seemed the days stood still, not allowing the soldiers to move forward to the pacific. Even Father Time didn't want them to go.

Even after a daily swim and continued comfort from Liebgott, the pain in her stomach and the hard tingle in her spine wasn't waning this time. She felt on edge all hours of the day, as if waiting for something. She didn't sleep often. When she did, she became dead to the world, her body catching up, but mostly she remained in her bunk, chewing on her lip, worrying the skin away.

The men seemed to be taking their training for war better than she was. Granted, they had field exercises to keep them busy. At night, they turned to card games and alcohol, with the odd adventure thrown in every now and then.

It was because of an adventure that Luz ended up in her aid station.

Evelyn saw red and Luz winced when he saw her nostrils flare in anger. The pain in his dislocated shoulder was nothing compared to the pain she was about to evoke on him, but he couldn't really run away, not yet. Roe hadn't set the joint yet.

"Ev, sweetheart, light of my life…"

Her chest heaved as she stared him down, her fists clenched at her sides. The three of them were alone in the aid station, but she couldn't see the mass of men behind her, peeking around the doorway from the foyer. If he could, Luz would flip them off, but he didn't want to risk any sudden movements near her at the moment.

"You're looking exceptionally pretty today," he added, his eyes widening by the second. "Did I mention that?"

Roe was silent. He grinned softly, but immediately tried to hide it. He didn't want to piss her off anymore than she already was. He moved the torn sheet around Luz's shoulder, getting ready to set it. Evelyn caught the movement. "Don't, Eugene," she murmured, deathly quiet. "I'll do it."

Luz's heart stopped with fear. "Actually, I think I prefer Doc just this once."

"Leave us," she continued. "I need to have a little talk with Luz."

Both men winced and Roe gave him a commiserating look, but he left them. Joining the others in the hall, he turned to watch the murder that was about to take place.

"Doc," whispered Malarkey. "What color are her eyes?"

Roe sighed and shook his head. "If they could be red, they would. But they are black, sergeant. Coal black."

A shiver went through the men. It had been awhile since any of them had done something stupid enough to warrant the look Luz was getting from her at that moment, but it wasn't easily forgotten.

Liebgott lit a cigarette happily. "I know that color all too well."

Martin snorted. "You're the reason her eyes usually look like that, Lieb. How does it feel when it's directed at someone else?"

"Like I just won the right to bring Hitler back to life only to kill him again myself. Damn, this feels good."

Luz wasn't sure if he was breathing. "Remember you love me."

Evelyn took a step forward. If Luz could back up, he would. She barred her teeth. "And why exactly do you think I am so goddamn angry right now, Luz?"

He thought quickly. "Because I got hurt?"

She shook her head minutely and took another step forward. "No."

He tried to look anywhere but her. "Because I'm stupid?"

"Warmer." Another step.

"Because I stole a motorcycle and slipped a little?"

His pathetic answer was the last straw. She leaned in closer to him. "It's because I love you," she answered softly.

A wave of pain crossed his face unrelated to his shoulder. "Ev, I -"

The gates of Hell opened. Luz was pretty sure he needed to sic a priest fast to rid her of the devil possessing her. "Is this any way to treat your goddamn best friend, Luz?" He reared back, the heat of her anger causing him to try and find shelter. The men winced.

Evelyn's heart pounded and Luz swore he saw a vein pop out on her temple as she continued to scream at him. "After everything we have gone through, after everyone we have lost, after Shifty is taken away to recover for months in a hospital - you decide to take a joyride around the countryside! What the hell were you thinking? Have you ever even driven a goddamn motorcycle before? I think I know the answer and it isn't in your favor!"

Luz knew she wasn't looking for an answer at that point. He also knew she wasn't done.

Angry tears burned her eyes and his heart pumped painfully at the sight of them. "What do you think would happen if you had been killed? Do you honestly think I could have gone on without you?"

"Ev, I -"

"You shut the fuck up! I am not done!"

Luz winced again, bowing his head. She pulled at her hair in exasperation. Her voice became low and the tears spilled over. "If you died under my hands, I wouldn't be able to live with myself, George." His head snapped up at her soft voice and his face grimaced in pain again. "Nothing would have been able to clean your blood off my skin."

He swallowed hard before trying to hug her but remembered his shoulder. He took her hand instead, and he was encouraged when she didn't pull away. "I'm sorry, Ev. It was a bad decision. Please don't cry, sweetheart."

Evelyn squeezed his fingers before pulling them back to wipe her eyes and nose. She cleared her throat and moved to fix his shoulder. "You're not forgiven yet."

"Just tell me what I gotta do, and it's done."

She smiled soflty when she spotted the men in the corner of her eye. "For one, it's time to give the other guys a show. I think they deserve it, don't you?"

Luz's eyes widened. "A show? What do you…sweetheart, can't we get Doc back for this? I am not questioning your medical skills, absolutely not, but do you think you're in the right mind…why are you holdin' out a belt for me to bite? WHY IS THERE A BELT FOR ME TO BITE?"

Evelyn didn't say anything, but what happened to Luz shook her. She knew in her heart that what happened with Shifty and then him were accidents and could easily happen back in the States. But they weren't home. They were at a standstill in a foreign country, biding their time until they got their orders.

Luz walked on eggshells around her for a day, but after he gave her his apple at breakfast and he received a kiss on the cheek in return, he sighed in relief and they fell back into their normal routine.

Liebgott was often busy manning the checkpoint with their German counterparts. He rotated with Webster and Janovec, who also spoke the language. At first Evelyn was worried that his emotions from the war wouldn't allow Liebgott to work well with their old enemy, but it seemed his hatred was held solely for the SS and those that worked the concentration camps. He was at peace with the German soldiers stationed in town.

Both Liebgott and Evelyn were enjoying some alone time together in an alleyway nearby the aid station. Luck would have it that their shifts ended about the same time.

Liebgott grazed a hand over her trousers on her hip until he moved lower and cupped her ass, pulling her hips against his own. "Do you feel what you do to me, Cassidy?" he murmured against her lips.

Evelyn's arms were wrapped around his neck, fingers combing through his hair, and moaned when she felt him. "Christ," she whispered. "Where can we go?"

Just as he was going to reply to hell with finding somewhere to go, a horn of a jeep sounded repeatedly, the plea from it evident. They broke apart and stared at one another until the horn sounded again. Evelyn ran towards it, Liebgott on her heels.

The jeep stopped abruptly, tires sliding on the dirt. Webster was driving and an injured Janovec was slumped in the back seat.

"What happened?" she cried, running to the wounded private.

Webster ran a hand through his hair. "Jeep accident. The driver was dead instantly, but last time I checked, Janovec was still breathing."

"Joe," she called. "Go get me a stretcher!" Liebgott left immediately. "David, I need you to…" Her fingers felt Janovec's throat. There was no pulse. "Shit," she murmured.

Webster's eyes widened when she slumped against the side of the jeep, no longer looking at Janovec. "No!" he cried, running to his side. "He was breathing when I got him in the jeep! Check him again!"

Obediently and with a grimace, Evelyn checked Janovec's pulse point, but it was still. To help Webster accept that the private was gone, she laid her ear against his chest but heard and felt nothing. She looked up just as Liebgott returned with the stretcher. "I'm sorry, David."

Liebgott stopped short. "Shit."

He must have alerted the surgeon, because Kent came hustling out next and an ambulance wasn't far behind. Between the men, they laid Janovec onto the stretcher, just as Welsh, Speirs and Winters arrived.

"75 points," murmured Webster.

Welsh looked up. "What?"

Webster's face remained white. "He had 75 points. Needed ten more."

Evelyn met Liebgott's eyes and sighed. Ten too little.

June 29, 1945

Evelyn was in her tent, alone, staring at her hands. Although not covered in blood, they felt dirty. After scrubbing for several minutes, they still didn't feel clean. They shook in front of her eyes.

How many more? How many more men will I watch die? How many more would get to me already gone? Or body pieces missing? Crying for their mothers?

When the dead first visited her, it spooked her, but she didn't think anything of it. She couldn't be alone in this, remembering those they lost. Back then, it was only a few and their visits were far between.

And then Bastogne happened. Their faces plagued her, but also their voices, the feel of their cold, dead skin. The warmth of the blood that was no longer theirs.

They've stuck with her since, exploding when Adrianna died. Since her rant on VE Day, she hoped it was over, that they'd leave her alone, but then the threat of another war happened and they reappeared. Now they had a new friend in Janovec. How many more?

Evelyn began to rely heavily on swimming in the lake. Before it was a daily exercise she enjoyed in twilight, when everyone was finishing up for the day. But now she visited the water at least twice a day, three times if she could manage it. The men heckled her relentlessly, claiming she must have found an Austrian lover because she was absent so frequently; her blush in response didn't help squash the theory. But she let them think that. She needed her time to herself before she went mad.

The night was dark and still. The moon was hidden behind some clouds, but she relished the darkness. It swallowed her whole in the water, and it was a long time before she finally stepped from it.

Clad only in her PT shorts and tshirt, she walked barefoot back to her tent, toweling her hair dry. She hummed a tune to herself, trying to stick with the distraction and thought longingly of her bunk. She had been able to squeeze in three swims today around her shift at the aid station. Exhaustion overwhelmed her.

Just when she was about to come across the main road, she heard a shout to her left and then the unmistakable sound of a gun firing.

With her eyes wide, Evelyn ran towards the sound. Up ahead, she could see a few vehicles strewn about. Before she arrived to the scene, a jeep whizzed by her, swerving, almost taking her out. She watched it go, mouth agape, before moving quickly towards the others in front of her.

There were several soldiers on the ground, not moving. She turned to two young replacements in the jeep to her right. "Tell me what happened!"

One pointed to the ground. "He shot Sergeant Grant!"

Evelyn ran to where he gestured. Grant laid on his side, his back to her. Sliding in beside him, she cursed when she saw he was bleeding from the head. "I need bandages! Check the glove compartment!"

The other replacement came running, hands full of white fabric. Wincing, Evelyn placed the bandage hard on his skull, but she didn't miss the sight of grey, wriggly muscle underneath. "Was he only hit once?"

The young man nodded. "Yes, ma'am."

Evelyn nodded to herself. "OK, we need to get him back to the aid station. Help me with him."

Together and along with the other soldier, the three of them were able to get Grant into the back of the jeep. Evelyn sat with him, pressing the increasingly wet bandage to his head. She murmured to him constantly. "It's going to be OK, Chuck. You're going to be OK."

It felt like a lifetime before they finally arrived back in town, but it was probably only minutes. They peeled into the lane in front of the building. Together, they carried Grant in as Evelyn shouted at the top of her lungs. "Captain Speirs! Lieutenant Welsh! Captain Nixon! Major Winters!" She yelled for anyone she could think of. "Bull! Johnny! Tab!"

Finally, Talbert ran into the room. His eyes widened. "Jesus Christ, what happened?"

She turned to him. "Go find the regimental surgeon. Major Kent. You know where he's stationed, yes?" Talbert didn't move, his eyes still on Grant. "Talbert!" He startled. "Go find Kent!" He nodded finally and ran from the room. Evelyn turned to the replacements. "Someone go find Speirs. The other find Winters. He needs to know what happened."

At last, she was alone with Grant. Now that he was on the table, she squatted down to sit on her heels before changing the bandage with a clean one. She whispered in his ear. "You're going to live, Chuck. Do you hear me? You're going to live." You have to.

Kent and Speirs slid into the room with Talbert and one of the replacements. As soon as Kent had his hand on the bandage, Evelyn stepped away to give him some room. "Gunshot wound to the head, sir. I think the bullet grazed, but the skull is fractured." She paused. "I saw grey matter."

Kent nodded but didn't answer. He continued in his examination. She turned to Speirs. "Sir, there's an armed soldier on the loose. I believe him to be drunk. There were several bodies in the road."

Speirs nodded, his blue eyes icy. "So I've heard," he murmured. He moved forward until he got to Grant. Surprising them all, he took Grant's hand in his, and waited for the surgeon. Talbert followed. Roe then jogged into the room.

"Evie," he wheezed. "I heard what happened. Is Grant…"

They all watched as Kent straightened up and lit a cigarette. He shook his head. "There's nothing I can do. I'm not a brain surgeon. That's his only chance."

They all got quiet, knowing what that meant. The silence became suffocating. Slowly, Evelyn backed out of the room, the floor spinning below her.

"Evie…"

She ignored Roe and exited the room. She met a crowd of men in the foyer who had begun to hear what happened.

"Evie, how's Chuck?"

"Is he gonna be OK?"

"Tab said he was shot in the head."

"Evie."

"Where is the son of a bitch that shot him?"

"Evie."

"Evie."

"Evie!"

The room swam in front of her, and she couldn't see any of their faces. Before she got sick or screamed, she ran from the building and got outside.

She didn't stop when she felt the night air. Her lungs didn't want to cooperate, but they obeyed the exercise, burning red hot as she ran from the town. Her legs took her away, and she didn't care where. Only away. The farther the better.

Finally, she couldn't run any farther. Not only did her body protest, her bare feet throbbing, but she hit the waterline of the lake. Unless she turned or began to swim away, she could go no farther. She bent at the waist, trying to catch her breath.

Footsteps thudded behind her. "Cass," wheezed Liebgott.

She cut him off. "I'm not going back there, Joe," she cried, shaking her head violently. "So don't even try!"

"You don't have to go back. Just tell me that you're OK."

Evelyn paced back and forth near the edge of the water. Her breathing was ragged and her hands flew in every direction as she tried to put into words what she was going through her mind.

"Do you know...do you have any idea what it feels like knowing you can't do anything?" she cried. Her feet were beginning to wear a trail into the dirt. She didn't notice the cuts and scrapes on her skin where blood began to form. "That no matter how hard you try and no matter how much training you have, that it won't be enough? It's never fucking enough!" Her voice echoed across the water.

Liebgott watched her silently until he knew she was done. "Yeah, I do," he said quietly.

She stopped pacing then and turned to him. Her eyes flashed even under the shine of the tears there. "What do you do?" He was silent. Her face twisted as she charged at him. "Tell me what you fucking do then, Joe! Do you sit and watch from the sidelines and hope they don't die? Or do you blame yourself? Or maybe, just maybe, you wish you could take their place?" When he still didn't say anything, she turned back towards the water, and screamed with everything left, "Fuck you!"

Evelyn collapsed to her knees, her head lolling into her hands as sobs racked her body. "Fuck you," she choked out. "Fuck all you. I'm done."

Liebgott slowly began to unfreeze, her outburst unlike anything he had ever witnessed from her. To his knowledge, no one had ever seen her break down before.

Kneeling in front of her, he tentatively scooted closer and brought his arms around her shaking body. At first, she fought him. "No! I'm done!" she cried, pushing against him. "I'm done with this war. I'm done with all of you! I can't do it again. I won't do it again!"

He pulled her closer until her head laid onto his chest, her knees between his. Finally, she forgot her trepidation and collapsed against him, crying earnestly now. Her hands grasped the fabric of his shirt tightly. Liebgott only shushed her, rubbing his hands up and down her back, trying to bring her comfort.

She continued to sob, but the fight was out of her. "I'm leaving. They can shoot me all they want for desertion. I don't care. I don't care anymore."

Liebgott pressed his cheek into her hair. "You do care. That's why it hurts so much."

Evelyn shook her head quickly against him, protesting. "You're wrong. I don't." Another sob racked through her and her voice cracked. "I can't." A broken cry before she whispered, "It's killing me."

He held her for a long time as she slowly quieted. Hours may have passed for all they knew. When he felt it was safe, he said, "It's going to be OK, Cass. Everything is going to be OK."

Evelyn hiccuped against him, trying to catch her breath. Her voice was hoarse. "How do you know?"

He pulled back to give her a smirk. Although the expression seemed to be etched on his face permanently, she could see the compassion behind it. "Because some know-it-all medic told me that once, and, let me tell ya, you don't want to piss her off. It's better to take her word for it."

Evelyn giggled and sniffled, before pulling back from him. She attempted to give him a smile. "Sounds like she knows what she's talking about."

Liebgott helped her stand and his smirk deepened. "I wouldn't go that far. This broad is crazy."

She pinched his side, causing him to yelp. Wrangling an arm around her neck, he started ruffling her hair hard, but in the end, as they walked, his fingers gently brushed through it instead.

When they got back into town, no one said anything about Liebgott's arm around Evelyn's shoulders. She didn't care if they thought anything was amiss. His touch was the only thing keeping her standing up at this point.

Luz walked forward when he saw them. The others in the foyer all looked disgruntled and upset, but many of them had bloody and bruised knuckles. She put two and two together, remembering bits and pieces of their hunger to find the perpetrator, but she honestly couldn't think of the soldier that shot Grant. She didn't have room for another man. She sighed as Luz engulfed her in a hug.

"Ev," he said into her hair. "Chuck's going to make it."

When he pulled away, she shook her head. "Major Kent said that…"

"Speirs got a kraut brain surgeon."

Both Liebgott's and Evelyn's eyes flew to him. "What did you say?"

Luz smiled wide. "You heard me, sweetheart. Kraut surgeon said he's gonna make it."

Evelyn's jaw dropped and she immediately began to cry again to the horror of the men. "Don't tease me, George," she croaked.

He hugged her again and she saw Martin over his shoulder. He nodded. "It's true, Evie."

After pulling away from Luz again, she turned towards the aid station. "Is he still here? I need to see him. I'll fix you all up after, but let me see Chuck."

Without a word from the men to state otherwise, Evelyn made her way inside. Grant laid on the examination table, unconscious and a huge white bandage wrapped around his head. An IV was sticking out from his arm. She walked towards his one free ear.

Kneeling on the ground, she took his hand. Tears streamed down her face and the pressure filled her chest again. It could only be alleviated one way. "I'm so sorry, Chuck. I'm sorry I gave up on you. Please forgive me." Her body shook again as she laid her forehead down by his arm. "God, please forgive me."

She stayed like that a long time, murmuring to him and pleading. Well beyond the sun rising against the mountains, she remained.