"I hate dolphins." Automne said with a soft sigh, his chin perched tiredly in his hand like a fat rooster. "I just think dolphins are terrible people. Like, first of all everyone loves them. They're all like 'Oh look at the dolphin it's so cuuuute'." He mocked in a high pitched voice, slapping his hands over his cheeks for added effect. "But what do they do? They're just- just big, rubbery jerks."

Automne snapped his fingers, a serious look in his eyes. "And they're rapists! I'm serious, the males get in like these small groups and then they just chase down female dolphins until they're too tired to fight back. Then once she's tired out they start having sex with it; they're insane." Automne slouched back in his chair, making the leather give an almost rapturous crinkling sound as he gave a heavy sigh. "So, yeah that's, uh-that's why I don't like dolphins."

Petunia stared at him from across the table with an indescribably stunned look. "Dude… What the hell?!"

"What?" Automne said blankly.

"All I said was 'your move'." Petunia snapped as she gestured to a board of checkers sitting between them on the lounge table. "Where the hell did that come from?"

"Oh… I was just- kinda… Thinking out loud…" Automne looked down at the board shamefully and mindlessly moved one of his pieces.

"You have issues."

"Dolphins are assholes, you can't deny that."

"Oh, hell yeah they're assholes, but I'm just saying you have issues." Petunia casually retorted as she jumped one of his pieces and lifted it off the board.

As Automne tried to come up with some kind of response, one that didn't divulge his dark secrets, a familiar warmth flowed up his back. A small smile followed shortly after as Automne promptly turned his head and saw Eve enter the lounge.

"Hello," Eve said happily as she walked up to the table, her gentle positivity falling against them like down feathers.

Petunia gave a small wave, barely looking up from the board. "Yo,"

"Hey, Eve," Automne said as he lifted another piece across the board. "What's going on?"

"You guys will never believe what I just got us tickets to?" Eve said cheerfully, delving a hand into her jacket.

"Is it that show where those guys juggle chainsaws? I heard the show was a cut above the rest." Automne said with a large, stupid smile.

Petunia gave a disgusted groan. "Dude, do us all a favor and kill yourself." Her statement followed by the capture of two more of Automne's pieces.

"I thought your joke was funny." Eve said quietly as she stopped mid-way through pulling something out of her jacket to give Automne a reassuring smile.

"Thank you, Eve, for not being a colossal bitch." Automne said with a smile to Eve as he slowly slid one of his pieces across the board with his middle finger.

"Bite me," Petunia snapped, holding up her own middle finger.

"Sleep with me."

"Eww, no."

"Well then, that's my response."

"Whatever," Petunia said disinterestedly as she moved her piece over onto the far side of the board. "King me, bitch."

"Please don't fight, guys." Eve whimpered as she looked back and forth between the two.

"Oh, Eve, we're not fighting, we're bickering."

"Dude, I said king me." Petunia growled as she glared at Automne.

"Hold on for five seconds, you sentient rainbow." Automne snapped before turning to Eve with a polite smile. "So, Eve, what did you get tickets to?"

"Oh, umm, right, I got us all tickets to swimming with the dolphins." Eve said nervously as she pulled out four blue and dolphin-colored tickets.

Petunia gave a groan and hung her head. "Dust, damn it."

"What's wrong?" Eve said cluelessly as she stared down at the tickets. "Are you not a good swimmer, because you don't have to worry about that; there's a lifeguard that will be there at all times and the dolphin can help-"

"Eve, it's not that." Automne said after a heavy sigh. "Okay well, it's partially that because I've never been in water deeper than a puddle, but the thing is I don't trust dolphins."

"Why, dolphins are adorable." Eve said with a weakened smile. Her optimism trying to shine out onto Automne like sunlight through grimy glass.

"Eve, dolphins are horrible; they rape other dolphins."

"That's just a myth, though."

"That's what the media wants you to believe." Automne said with narrowed eyes as he glared at the tickets as if they were going to jump on top of him. "The point is I'm not going in the water. I'll pay you back for my ticket though."

Eve gave a sad sigh, "I was hoping this could be something we could all do together."

"Wait, you wanted all of us to swim with large aquatic mammals together?" Petunia said with a perplexed grimace.

"Don't worry, Eve, I'll come along with you guys." Automne consoled with a sincere smile, completely ignoring Petunia. "And if the dolphins get too frisky, or murdery I'll jump in and stab 'em for you."

Eve gave a gasp and gave Automne a stern frown. "Automne, you are not going to stab the dolphins."

"I will stab the dolphins!"

"Ugh, this is my tenth birthday party all over again." Petunia groaned as she folded her arms on the table and buried her face in them.

"There you are!" Ty called out as he ran into the lounge and up to their table.

Automne glanced him up and down hastily. Sweat had beaded up on his forehead and his glasses were slightly askew on his pale, square face. "Hey, dude, what's-"

"Guys, I have bad news." Ty said through pants, placing his hands down on the table for support and dramatic effect.

Automne stared at him flatly for a couple seconds before giving a simple, "What's up?"

"I was checking the team e-mail-

"We have a team e-mail?" Automne interrupted with a skeptical, yet nonchalant, eyebrow raise.

"-And we still haven't received the script for this chapter."

The three gave a gasp in unison while Ty took the time to try and catch his breath.

"What do you mean we have no script?" Eve whined as she clutched her tickets tightly.

"I mean, we have no script." Ty repeated with more than a fair amount of emphasis put on the phrase this time. "I have no idea what we're supposed to be doing in this chapter!" Ty shouted.

"But that makes no sense we were already doing our own thing." Automne tried to reason while trying to hide the fact that he was starting to hyperventilate.

"It doesn't matter now that I've called attention to it. Your pointless antics are just filler that has no impact on the overall story!" Ty barked, causing the few other people in the lounge to stare at them and begin whispering. "In fact, I don't even know why you two would even be playing checkers."

"You're right," Petunia said in awe, clarity bursting forth in her mind like someone hurled a monkey-wrench through a car windshield. "I don't even like checkers!" She shouted before grabbing the board and throwing it across the room, which coincidentally caused the whispers around them to become slightly more panicked.

"Dude, what're we gonna do?" Automne moaned as he got to his feet.

"C-could we go see the dolphins?" Eve asked uncertainly as she held out her tickets.

"Eww, no." Ty responded, recoiling at the very sight of the pieces of paper. "Dolphins are jerks."

"Oh," Eve said miserably as she hung her head.

"Hey, it's okay, Eve. The two of us can go and do whatever you want to do after we fix this." Automne said with a pleasant smile as he draped his arm over her shoulder.

"Really?" Eve said with a small smile as she cuddled up next to Automne.

"Automne, Eve" Ty started, "What are you doing?!"

Eve gave a gasp and pushed Automne away. "Oh no, I thought we were a couple. The story is losing continuity!"

"God damn it, stupid lazy-ass author and his stupid writing habits!" Petunia shouted as she banged her fist down onto the table.

"Petunia," Ty called out as he ran a hand through his hair. "You just said 'God', we say 'Dust' in this story!"

"Oh God- ehm shit- I mean Dust!" Petunia screamed.

"The story is falling apart!" Automne yelled as he fell to his knees. "What are we going to do?!"

"I'll tell you what we're going to do." Ty said boldly as he jumped atop the table. "We're going to write this chapter ourselves."

There was a fairly awkward silence as Automne, Petunia and Eve all stared up at Ty who was standing on the table looking off into the distance.

Ty gave a tired sigh. "Usually that's- that's where the author would put a line break so I would look epic."

"Oh," Automne said in surprise as he looked around the lounge, people staring at them nervously. "Well… How do we-"

"And then there was a line break!"

"Hey, it worked." Petunia said happily as the members of Team Taupe looked around their dorm room, which they were now standing in the center of… for unexplained reasons.

"Huh, I wonder how much control we have over the story." Automne inquired as he looked up at the line break.

"That doesn't matter now." Ty said dismissively as he walked over to Petunia's bed and pulled her laptop out from under her pillow. "What we need to focus on is coming up with an idea for this chapter. Now, does anyone have any suggestions?"

Automne paused and placed a hand on his chin. "Maybe we could do a chapter where I trick all of you into taking drugs, but in the end I reveal I was lying from the get go and there were no drugs."

"That's stupid and lame, next."

"Can we make a musical? That sounds like it could be fun." Eve proposed with a hopeful smile.

"Eve, this is a fanfic. How are we supposed to make a musical in a fanfic?" Ty said dismissively. "Alright, next idea."

"How about a chapter where Eve and I hang out and at the end I finger her in the closet." Petunia suggested with a broad grin.

"Can I vote against that idea?" Eve asked as she gradually side-stepped away from Petunia.

"I don't think that'll work either." Ty said doubtfully, but not doubtfully enough to insinuate it wasn't a possibility. "Automne's the main character; he has to be in it."

"Hold on a second, I'm the main character?" Automne glanced around quickly with a large smile. "Sweet!"

"I honestly don't know why." Ty said flatly as he began to type on the laptop. "Petunia and Eve both have more personality than you."

"Well, I have twice as much personality than you so that makes me the most relatable person on the team." Automne snidely brushed him off… like the emotionally insecure virgin he was.

Automne stopped and looked straight up. "What did that say?"

"What are you talking about? I didn't see anything." Ty mocked as he continued to type… his devilishly handsome jawline and his positively rippling muscles-

"Stop blowing yourself!" Automne shouted as he ran up and tried to yank Petunia's laptop from Ty's hands.

"Never!"

"Idiots!" Petunia hollered as she ran up, kicked Automne in the crotch, and slapped Ty across the face. Yanking her laptop from Ty's hands with a scowl she pressed it against her chest. "You're going to hurt my baby. Now, how about you two shut up, because I have an awesome idea for a chapter."

"Well, fire away." Ty said as he rubbed the side of his face.

"Alright, but you guys have to hear me out on this one." She said hesitantly as she stepped over to her bed and placed her laptop down.

"Just say it already." Automne croaked in pain.

Petunia turned and clapped her hands together. "Let's make a porno!"

"I'm in." Ty responded with a casual hand raise.

"Me too." A completely invigorated Automne responded as he tried to straighten himself out.

"No," Eve shouted with a stomp of her foot. "We are not making pornography!"

Petunia gave an exacerbated sigh and slinked her way over to the dark haired girl. "Come on, Eve, you're going to be the star."

"Whoa, hold up, Eve is not going to be in the video." Automne tried to assert with the crossing of his arms.

"Umm, yeah she is." Petunia said condescendingly, Eve writhing uncomfortably under her arm. "Dude, do you know how much people would pay to see her deflowering?"

"No one is going to deflower me!" Eve whined as she tried to push Petunia away.

"You're right, Eve. It's not going to be one person; we're going to have a three-way!" Petunia said with an audacious smile as she pulled Eve in closer. "It's just going to be you, me, and Ty."

Automne shot Petunia a scowl. "Hey, what about me?"

"Who do you think's gonna work the camera?"

Automne gave a heavy sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose. Quietly he made his way over to Petunia's bed and picked up her laptop.

"I hate you people." Automne murmured to himself as he opened the laptop and began to type.

"Hey, what're you-" Ty stopped as his Scroll vibrated loudly. He curiously lifted it off his belt and swiped his finger across the screen a few times. "Hey, guys, the new chapter just came in."

"Gee, Ty, what's it say, old buddy of mine?" Automne asked sarcastically as he set Petunia's laptop down on her bed.

"It says we're going to 'Watch Friends together on the lounge couch while wearing… Snuggies?'" Ty looked off into the distance, confused as an average Joe looking at a fur-suiter for the first time. "What the hell's a 'Snuggie'?"

"Oh, it's like a blanket with sleeves. I got about a dozen of 'em." Petunia said coolly removing her arm from around Eve and pointing over to one of her suitcases. "Come on, I'll show you."

Automne gave a half-smile and sat himself on Petunia's bed as her and Ty made their way across the room.

"Automne," Eve said softly as she sat down next to him on the bed. "How did you do that?"

"Easy," Automne said tiredly as he passed Eve the laptop. "I just wrote in a line where the author sends Ty the new 'chapter'."

"Oh," Eve said in surprise as she ran her finger across the completely unresponsive trackpad.

"Trackpads don't work if you're wearing gloves, Eve." Automne mumbled as he tried to nestle himself into Petunia's bedsheets.

Eve gave a small disappointed sigh. "It works sometimes… Hey, Automne."

"Yep,"

"Thank you,"

"For what?" Automne slurred as he mustered up the strength pry an eye open.

"For not letting them violate me." She responded with an almost unsettlingly familiar tone, as if it were some sort of common phrase.

Automne gave a small chortle. "You don't have to thank me for that, Eve."

"Oh... Well, thanks anyway." Eve said graciously, holding her fist out for a fist bump.

Automne gave her an amused smile and gave her fist a light bump. "No prob, Bob."

"Alright, who's ready to go watch 'Friends'?" Petunia boomed ecstatically as she walked up wearing an orange Snuggie.

"I've never actually seen 'Friends'." Eve said happily as she got to her feet.

"Well then, prepare to be mildly surprised." Ty quipped as he tossed Eve a zebra print Snuggie two sizes too large for her. "Automne, dude, do you want brown or plaid?"

"Give me a minute, I'm still trying to determine whether this chapter is canon or not." Automne grumbled tiredly as he wriggled on top of Petunia's comforter.

"Well, we didn't do jack and all we really learned is that you hate dolphins and Eve has never seen 'Friends'. So, who gives a shit?"

Automne paused for a moment. "Eh, that's good enough for me." He said with a shrug, sitting up with a large smirk. "Ty, toss me the brown one."

"Sure, you don't want plaid?"

"Do I look like a hipster to you?" Automne said with a raised eyebrow.

"No, but you look like a bitch."

"Burn," Petunia snapped with a large smile as she grabbed her laptop, her Snuggie hanging off her loosely.

Automne gave a heavy sigh and rolled off Petunia's bed. "Let's just get this show on the road."

"Wait, is the show about a road-trip?" Eve said curiously from somewhere inside her Snuggie, which she was absolutely drowning in.

Automne gave a sigh of defeat as he reluctantly embraced the trials and tribulations of friendship. Which, secretly, he didn't mind too much.