(email: set between arrival and me 3)

Garrus-

I miss you. Though having hot food and soft bed is nice. Not as nice as you.

How is the Kiddo? Hope you two are not having too much fun without me. And remember no thresher maw coming of age party without me.

This siting around is killing me. I should be out there with you. Not locked up here.

It's not bad It's only 'house arrest'. I even get a chance to work out. There's always a guard when I leave the room.

I know it's been 2 month already... I worry about the others that turned them self in. Joker especially.

I think about you every night...every day...the dreams are getting worse. The shrink keeps trying to get me to talk about them... yeah that went as well as you imagine.

When I wake up and can't sleep I think of the vacation we took. I feel bit bad at times that we took those few months to go do all that stuff.

But then I realize how stressed I am and how relaxed I get with I think about it and realize that it was a good thing. That you talked me in to the trip.

Take care and I miss you

Love,

Jane

*deleted*

Garrus,

How have-

*deleted*

Vakarian,

*deleted*

Garrus,

Damn it all...let them rot in hell!

-Shepard

*deleted*

Garrus,

It's

*deleted*

Garrus,

Not sure what to say. sorry about how long this took to send... not sure what will be censored. So I will simply say...

Try not to added to your collection of scars. Take care of the Kiddo.

-Shep

*sent*

(klutz me3)

"Lieutenant Cortez?" Shepard walked up Lucius trying his best to hide behind her. Cortez straightened up and turned to Shepard. One eyebrow raised slightly.

"Ma'am you don't have to do this. You can just-"

"Kid if you tell me one more time that I can just drop you off anywhere I will bust you down to cleaning duty so fast that your head will spin." Shepard smiled at Cortez but wiped it off before turning to face Lucius. She poked a finger in Lucius' chest. "No matter what you might think, you are a part of this crew. You kept the Hammerhead and shuttles running. And they way Garrus tells it you saved his life." She turned back to Cortez.

"This is Lucius Oraka. Lucius this is Cortez. He is in charge of the flight deck. And acquaintance the kodiak." She turned to Lucius "Sorry kiddo the hammerhead is gone."

She turned back to Cortez "Lucius is a excellent mechanic. I would greatly appreciated it if you could show him how the alliance runs this area, and show him the in's and out's of the kodiak."

Lucius ducked his head and shuffled back a bit in embarrassment. His foot caught a box of tools and dumped them over with a clatter.

"Sorry." he dropped down quickly scattering them even more. Shepard placed her hand over her eyes, and added softly to Cortez.

"And a bit of a klutz, but he's a good kid." She dropped her hand as Cortez replied back.

"Don't worry ma'am I'll take him under my wing."

"Thanks." Shepard started to walk off as Cortez dropped down to help pick up the tools.

"So you saved Garrus?" Cortez asked

"I didn't mean to!" came the almost wail from the teenager. "Wait...I mean I didn't want him to die. I just did not mean for that to happen that way!"

Shepard held onto her laughter till she the elevator doors shut.

She knew that Lucius would be good for Cortez, would give him something to think about besides the past. And Cortez would be a steadying, not larger then life role-model for Lucius to learn from.

(catalyst me3)

Shepard rolled out of bed as quietly as she could managed not wanting to wake Garrus. It did not work.

"...Ok?" he mumble reaching out a hand for her. She caught it and tucked it back under the covers.

"Fine, go back to sleep. Just going to walk the ship." Shepard replied. Garrus mumbled something else that Shepard could not make out as he rolled over and fell back asleep. Shepard smiled and went to make her round of the night crew. Shepard stopped in front of Liara's door something niggling the back of her brain about the dream that woke her up.

"Edi, is Liara awake?" Shepard asked turning her head up to ask Edi.

"Yes Shepard."

"Thank you." Shepard replied knocking Liara's door. It slid open Liara looked up from data pad to face Shepard a small smile on her face. Shepard glanced over at the monitor and froze. Starring not at the normal nebula light show but images of the relays. From all angles. Shepard snapped back when Liara called her name.

"Shepard, are you alright?" Liara asked worriedly. Shepard let a smile spread slowly on her face...

"I know what the Catalyst is." Shepard replayed with a sing song tone.

Liara froze, "You do?"

"Yes." Shepard points at the image on the monitor. "Actually it would be the Citadel. When the reapers use it to come 'into' the galaxy." Liara's eyes widened.

"So the Crucible allows us to... reverse the citadel? To go to the Reapers home?" Liara turned to her computer excitedly talking about it.

"I guess so... Liara, let not tell anyone yet...till it time to activated the Crucible." Shepard replied as she settled in a chair in the corner. Closing her eyes she let Liara excited chatter wash over her like a balm.

For the first time since she saw the vision from the beacon on Eden Prime, she felt that they actually had a chance of wining this thing.

"Shepard, you know anything about this 'avatar' that keeps popping up in the records? Says something like only the avatar of tenacious and the hand picked crew can make it thru."

"Hell if I know Liara." Shepard smiled slightly curling up in the chair.

"This word might not be tenacious...relentless? no... implacable..."

(ME3- Priority: Rannoch)

"I'm going to have to go in first." Shepard said stepping down on to the damaged docking tube. She slowly made her way to the other end. Her boots vibrating silently in the vacuum of space. The only sound she heard was her ragged breath.
"Shepard, your vitals are starting to red line. Do we need to send in the rest of the team?" Edi's voice startled Shepard.
"No, there is no hostiles, and this tube is in pretty bad shape." Shepard voice was not as steady as she would have like. She glanced around her eyes caught the planet, she froze. Finally a voice called her from her stupor.
"...then Vega tried to tell me that he had drank a krogan under the table." Garrus snorted, Shepard felt her breath starting to slow down, "So then I told him I once head butted a krogan so hard that he woke up the next week."
"Funny I though that was me." Shepard replied, tearing her eyes away from the planet. Getting her body moving.
"Glad you could join us again Shep." His voice was lighthearted, but she could hear the worry in the tone. She continued on, her breath still harsh.

She saw the door. Then felt the tubing shift, her boots losing there grip, she felt her self start to float away. Her breath defeating in her hearing. But she did not black out, though the edges where getting a bit gray. She still heard Garrus voice calmly telling her about the hanar prostitute he once had to arrest. Shepard looked around her, noticing a piece of the tubing, she used it to pull herself down. Her boot relocked to the tube. She quickly made the last few feet to the door. After she stepped into the ship she looked back at the broken tube floating away.
"We're not going to be able to use that one again. Find a new entrance way." Shepard barked, years of command help to steady her voice.
"All ready on it commander. Just past the hole in the ship and to the port there is a door that lead to the the next docking tube." Tali voice sounded worried.
"Good job Tali. Joker bring them around." Shepard replied quickly made her way to the next air lock. Normally she would have made a comment about the hole size, perhaps tease Tali a bit. But Shepard didn't think her voice would stay steady enough for that.

The tube door opened and Tali rushed passed Shepard she took a position at the corner. Garrus stopped and placed a hand on Shepard's shoulder, his voice low enough for her to hear he asked but no one else, "You ok?"

"Better now thanks." Shepard replied her breath still a little ragged.
"Glad to know I'm more than a pretty face." Garrus laughed as he pulled out his rifle. Shepard smiled and pulled out her assault rifle.
"All right boys and girls we've got a reaper signal to shut down." She walked toward the hall way her confidence restored.

A/N:

slight cannon changes. Besides the obvious of my 'ending' is different. (since Shepard is blinded and damaged not flat out killed.) got a few ideas, as seen in Catalyst.

Ok timing... me1 takes about 3 months or so. And the Normandy shot down about 2 months after Sovereign destruction.

ME 2 starts about 2 years after Sovereign destructing. It takes her about 6 months to destroy the collector. Then they have about 3 months of 'vacation' before the DLC arrival. With the next 3months ish they spend trying to get info on Reapers and rally support. Then she turns her self in. I know canon says she is custody for about 6 months, I am dropping that down to about 4 months. Then the reapers attack...

2nd A/N: THANK YOU for all the favs. And following even after all this time. I have been a bit blah. Still been writing stuff. But I need to do a major overhaul of my files and figure out which ones I've posted and which ones have not been posted. And as usual if you see any spelling or grammar errors please feel free to PM me I will fix it. I still do not have a Beta :S

and final A/N the third: Pleas check out Myetel's 'Spirit of' series. I stole the Hanar Prostituted from her story. His name is ' Gives Solace to the Body of Many'