Phox: Yay! Chapter Three brought to you by~ -Ditkata, HidanAndKakuzusGirl, Leo, and my good friend, Sammi-
Hidan: … Please tell me you don't have that planned for me...
Phox: *eyes glint mischievously in his direction*
Hidan: … Phox?
Phox: And now~ On with warnings:
Yaoi -duh
Language -duh
OOC & OC
Read! At! Own! Risk!
Pairing(s) : Kakuzu X Hidan
–Let us begin...
They stopped at a cave for the meeting. Kakuzu dropped Hidan before they got to far. This resulted in a massive tantrum from Hidan.
"You fucking prick! Don't just fucking drop me! At least give me some damned warning!" He seethed on their way into the cave.
"Shut up, weakling." Kakuzu returned the Jashinist's glare.
Inside, the arriving members were surprised to find Sasori and Deidara there in the flesh. Sasori spotted Kakuzu and waved him over. Hidan, meanwhile, invited Deidara to him. Zetsu and Phox headed to the center of the cavern to wait patiently for Pein to show.
"Hey, Hidan, is it true you went to the lair of Sasori-danna's former partner, hm?" Deidara asked him in a hushed voice.
"Yeah. That bastard is fucking weird." Hidan scoffed in reply.
"He didn't try anything on you, hm?" Deidara pressed, walking with him to where Phox and Zetsu stood.
"Like what?" Hidan blinked.
"Y'know, un. Touch you? Experiment on you, hm?" Deidara glanced at his partner whom was in deep conversation with Kakuzu.
"Umm... He ejected something in my ass." Hidan frowned, "I think he took a fucking blood sample too, after testing my immortality.
"HE EJACULATED IN YOUR ASS, HM!" Deidara misheard.
This caused everyone's head to turn. Hidan slapped his face when he felt their eyes bare down on him. Kakuzu's eyes narrowed in fury. He flinched at that. He slapped a hand to Deidara's mouth then pulled him into the nearest hallway.
"Shut the fuck up, you stupid blonde bitch." Hidan hissed.
"Sorry... I misunderstood, hm." Deidara sighed.
"You're damn right you misunderstood, bitch." Hidan sighed this time, running a hand through his hair.
"Oi, bimbos, get your asses over here." The two addressed scowled, marching back over to the meeting room at Kakuzu and Sasori's simultaneous call.
"Piss off, cock suckers." Hidan shot back, joining the circle between Deidara and Phox.
There was a familiar sound and soon the remaining Akatsuki members appeared as static apparitions. Itachi and Kisame appeared first, the latter sending a smirk when he spotted Hidan. Then Pein and Konan signaled the last of the Akatsuki and the discussion began.
"Alright, Zetsu, what have you learned?" Pein demanded.
"We have a name and a location. He's Gaara of the Sand Village." Zetsu informed.
"Is that all?" Pein's Rinnegan flashed in Phox's direction as she stepped up.
"Sir, may we please wait a bit yet. I think it best I learn more of this Gaara then discuss a plan with our other resident artists." she suggested in a strong voice.
"Hm. How long?" He said, opening the eyes he had closed in thought.
"About a year and a half." Phox replied right as he had finished the last word.
There was a tense silence. Phox stepped back into place, her face devoid of all emotion.
"... And what makes you think I'll let you waste that much time?" The atmosphere remained tense.
"Well," Phox began, crossing her arms, "You still need time to set up and the Akatsuki fundings are still pretty low. Plus, I think that everyone should have some time to prepare. We've been relaxing for awhile now, waiting for the time to strike... almost too much relaxing if you ask me."
"... I shall consider it. For now, you have three months." Pein concluded, leaving the meeting.
"Watch yourself Phox; Leader might not go with your plan for long." Itachi spoke at last.
"What do you mean 'Akatsuki fundings are still pretty low'?" Kakuzu grumbled, "Ever since I've been put in charge of funds, the Akatsuki has had just enough."
"You won't be thinking that in a few months." Kisame laughed before phasing out with Itachi.
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Kakuzu scoffed, exchanging a questioning look with his partner.
"'Let the dead bury the dead.'" Phox quoted.
"They're immortal, un." Deidara blinked.
"Whatever. Come on now, my fellow artists, time to train." Phox laughed, pulling them from the room.
Zetsu followed after. This left the Immortal Duo alone. Kakuzu, upon realizing this, shot Hidan a smirk. Hidan returned it before the pair headed for a separate hallway. Kakuzu led the way to their temporary quarters, pulling Hidan by the wrist. They made their way to the single bed; Kakuzu being to cheap to buy everybody individual bed and Hidan complaining of uncomfortable cots.
"K-Kakuzu... as much as I'd love to um... well... after what happened earlier- AH!" Hidan was cut off as his partner threw him to the mattress.
"Mn. I missed out last night, Hidan. No way I'm missing another night." Kakuzu whispered, placing his lips to his partner's.
Hidan returned it at first. However he felt the ache return. As Kakuzu's hand made its way south, Hidan winced. That's when he recalled something...
–
– Flashback –
–
Orochimaru had said something quite strange.
"Once you are free you must refrain from sex for about a day. After that, you must have intercourse before the third day."
–
– End Short Flashback –
–
Hidan began to squirm more. Kakuzu frowned at his uke's protests. He heaved a sigh then sat on his knees. Hidan gave a sigh of relief as the pain diminished. His relief didn't last long at seeing Kakuzu's expectant glare.
"I fucking told you; it hurts!" Hidan pouted, turning on his side, facing away from Kakuzu.
Kakuzu scoffed at his no-longer-masochistic masochist. However he lay down behind him, wrapping an arm around his midsection.
–
– Meanwhile... –
–
Phox had left Sasori and Deidara at their temporary quarters before leaving the base with Zetsu for their own hangout. She waited for the door to his room to close before she snuck back out. There she met Itachi, Kisame, and Kabuto. She dipped her head in greeting before leading the three into the surrounding woods.
"Phox-sama, what are you going to do if Kakuzu and Hidan don't accept the gift you're forcing upon them?" Itachi stated once they had stopped a good distance away from the hideout.
"He's got a point, Phox-sama... they don't seem very... family-friendly if you catch my drift." Kisame laughed nervously.
"We'll deal with that when it crosses our paths." Phox replied calmly.
"Yes, there is still a chance that Kakuzu won't ejaculate in Hidan soon enough." Kabuto stated calmly.
The three gave him an, 'Are you an idiot?' look.
"Of course Kakuzu will. They screw each other every night." Kisame snorted.
"Hm... well, even so; the chance of the embryo surviving is slim." Kabuto gave a shrug, pushing his glasses up.
"Have you seen the potential fathers in action? They're not named the Immortal Duo for nothing." Phox responded calmly.
"Very well, we shall see." Itachi sighed.
–To Be Continued...
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