Phox: Yay! Chapter Six brought to you by~ -darknessangel13, Ditkata, HidanAndKakuzusGirl, TenshiBabe, MidnightHyuga, & Yokon-
Hidan: Can't believe you.
Phox: I can believe you.
Hidan: What?
Phox: And now~ On with warnings:
Yaoi
Language
OOC & OC
MPREG
Fem!Hidan, Fem!Deidara, & Fem!Sasori
Read! At! Own! Risk!
Pairing(s) : Kakuzu X Hidan & Sasori X Deidara
–Let us begin...
By nightfall the six Akatsuki had reached the rendezvous place. It was an inn at a somewhat rundown village which is what they had expected given Kakuzu's obsession with money. At least the miser had allotted two rooms. Sadly, Phox insisted the 'girls' separate from the 'boys'. So, in one room the females (Hidan, Deidara, and Sasori) sat surrounding a red cat (Phox) while Kakuzu was left in the other room alone with Zetsu as he droned about human flesh and which age was ripest.
"Alright girls," Phox ignored the death glares from the three 'men', "once Kakuzu meets his client tomorrow afternoon, you'll act accordingly without poisoning, maiming, or blowing up said client."
Deidara rose his hand then added, "Can I blow him, un?"
"If you blow him I'll have two new puppets to add to my collection, brat." Sasori threatened.
"I was just joking, Danna." Deidara pouted, glaring at Hidan as he rolled on the floor laughing.
"Enough. Act more lady-like." Phox hissed then added, "Well... like prostitutes."
"Tch, but we don't know how, stupid bitch. In case you've forgotten, we're guys." Hidan panted, sitting back up.
"Hm, I guess we'll have to practice then."
They didn't have to wonder how for long. Phox had already changed into a man form.
"You've got to be fucking kidding." Hidan drawled.
"Now, is that anyway for a lady to talk?" Phox replied with a drawl of her own, "Punishment is stripping. Now."
"What?"
–
"Wake up, Kuzu~"
"Ngh, fuck off, Hidan." Kakuzu grumbled, burying his head in the pillow.
"I can't do that myself, silly." Hidan practically purred as Phox had taught him.
Kakuzu blinked, suddenly more awake. Hidan sounded different... He slowly sat up and turned to glance at his partner. His jaw dropped a bit from the sight. Hidan did not have too many changes to his hair, only it was a bit longer and lighter. Kakuzu also took note of more curves especially when his eyes reached Hidan's bust. He stood to get a closer look, peering into her -his- large pink eyes.
"... Hidan... why are your eyes pink?" was all he could manage.
"Ask the bi- I mean Phox. Apparently pink eyes would be more appealing then my magenta eyes." Hidan paused then gave a pout, looking uncertain, "Do you think I look cute?" He even bat his eyelashes for effect.
"Uh... er... y-yeah. Of course..." Kakuzu spoke while repeatedly thinking, 'Cute! You're a chick! We're gay... Not cute, you're hot!'
"Oh... that's good then." Hidan smirked, twirling around to leave.
His hair whipped Kakuzu's face on the way out. He blinked then ran to the bathroom. Meanwhile Hidan hurried down to the lobby to meet the artists. He paused on the way to fiddle with his crimson kimono. Sasori saw him arrive first, sidestepping Deidara as he lashed out to slap him.
"What took you so long? Don't tell me he ravished your body." Sasori smirked having seen him arranging his clothes.
"No, he just takes forever to wake up." Hidan snapped, stomping his foot in a tantrum-throwing manor.
"Sure..." Sasori rolled his chocolate colored eyes which had also been changed accordingly.
"Why was Dei-chan going to slap you anyways?" Hidan asked, relaxing.
"He made fun of my breasts, un." Deidara pouted, joining them.
"I didn't make fun of them, brat! I gave you a compliment! They're huge!" To emphasize his point, he poked one through the blue kimono.
"At least he has some." Hidan sneered after Deidara slapped the redhead's hand away.
"I have boobs too! They're just smaller then your guys'." Sasori frowned.
"Enough with your booby envy, girls. The client is due any moment now." Zetsu rolled his eyes, in his disguise.
"Where's Kakuzu?" Phox hissed quietly from Zetsu shoulder, also in her disguise.
"How the hell should we know?" Hidan scoffed.
"You are his girlfriend, Hisako." Phox replied.
"So you gave them false names already. What are they?" Kakuzu finally arrived, dressed as always only he wore an all black cloak as opposed to the Akatsuki's.
"Hidan is Hisako, Deidara is Aoi, and Sasori is Akane." Zetsu listed.
"... Good enough."
–
By the time their target arrived, everyone was in place, sitting at a booth in the inn's dark dining area. Kakuzu sat between the artists with Hidan on his lap and waved the newcomer over. Hidan looked over his shoulder, his face leaving the comfort of his seme's neck. He hurried to hide his face once more after getting a good look at the guy. Their client was horrible with slightly chubby and whatever hair he had was graying not to mention the smell.
"You'll have to forgive her, Gomi-san, she's shy." Kakuzu rumbled, tugging Hidan's hair when Gomi looked to the other two.
"That's alright, old friend. I don't mind a shy one." He sat on the booth across from Kakuzu.
"Kakuzu-danna... you know this man, hm?" Deidara said although 'man' wasn't what ran through his head.
"Hush girl. I suppose a change would be nice, Gomi-san." Kakuzu dismissed Deidara with a wave of his hand.
"So, who are they then?" Gomi questioned, eying the blonde or more particularly his bosom.
"The blonde is Aoi and the redhead is Akane." He didn't want to mention Hidan if it could be helped.
"Your stock is poor for a change, Kazuhiro-san." Gomi looked from Hidan to Sasori with mild distaste.
"I'm afraid your usuals were taken for the night. The only outgoing slut here is Aoi here." Kakuzu replied coolly.
"I must say though, it is odd to see you back in business. When I heard the rumors I simply had to come." Gomi sneered, placing a briefcase on the table. "How much for the trio?"
"Hm. Aoi is 67$ and Akane is 49$."
"What about the third you have failed to name?"
"Her name is Hisako and 56$ for her." He winced when Hidan's teeth dug into his skin.
"As expected you ask a hefty amount but I'll take the lot of them for the night." He pulled out the proper amount and Kakuzu removed his hand from Hidan's hair to accept it. "I'll collect them in a moment but for now I must excuse myself."
Kakuzu watched the man leave in silence then went to pocket the money once he had left. Hidan stopped him though, digging his nails into his wrist. Kakuzu growled and glared at Hidan whom had pulled away from his neck.
"Why the fuck is blondie worth more than me, bastard?" he spat.
"Because my rack is better, un."
"And he's a better lay." Sasori added, reaching across Hidan's back to grope a breast.
"Hands off, Danna, un!" SLAP.
"Bullshit he's a better lay!" Hidan snapped, trying to wriggle his way off Kakuzu's lap.
"Hidan, calm down. He'll be back from the bathroom any minute." Kakuzu whispered, pocketing his earnings while restraining his hotheaded lover with his free arm wrapped around his waist.
"Let me go! Why didn't you tell me you worked as a fucking whore-seller?" Hidan hissed, still struggling.
"I don't see why that should matter now." Kakuzu replied, keeping Hidan at his side.
"Piss off." Hidan grumbled, "And no sex for a fucking month!"
"Don't be unreasonable, love!" Kakuzu pleaded.
"Kakuzu," Phox hissed from somewhere in Deidara's kimono, "deal with this later, your regular's back."
"Regular!" Hidan fumed but was silenced by Sasori's hand.
"Have fun tonight, Gomi." Kakuzu dipped his head as Sasori pulled Hidan away while Deidara climbed over his lap to join them.
"Don't I always, Kazuhiro-san?"
I have chapter seven finished, btw. Just need reviews. xD
-
Aoi - Blue
Akane - Brilliant Red
Hisako - Long-Lived Child
Kazuhiro - Prosperous One
Gomi - Trash