Phox: Yay! Chapter Twelve brought to you by~ -Ditkata, HidanAndKakuzusGirl, & FanGirlMania- (You three are epic as is HaloGabieter)

Hidan: Where's your pussy?

Phox: *glares*

Hidan: I meant cat! I meant cat!

Phox: And now~ On with warnings:

Yaoi

Language

OOC & OC

MPREG

Read! At! Own! Risk!

Pairing(s) : Kakuzu X Hidan

"Tch. So you and Orochimaru were involved." Hidan grumbled as he followed Kabuto further into a cave very close to his and Kakuzu's.

"You seemed an easy choice and we were right." Kabuto smirked, stopping at a door.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Hidan snapped as the door slid open.

It was nice, to Hidan's surprise. Almost like an actual hospital room. Hidan allowed Kabuto to lead him to the lain back chair at the center of the room. His magenta eyes kept darting around the room, looking for Orochimaru.

"You and I will be the only ones allowed in here until further notice. I will act as a sort of... midwife." Kabuto put his hand to Hidan's naked belly. "There won't be much for me to see, but I can at least confirm things."

"Aren't you gonna ask me shit about my family or something?" Hidan asked.

He had watched a few movies with Phox, Itachi, and Deidara when they got together. Hidan scowled thinking of this. No doubt it was all her plan.

"Phox already gathered necessary research with Zetsu. They're very good spies after all." His hand began to glow with chakra and he quietly began to examine the womb.

–

Kakuzu sat on his bed, scowling at the wall. Perhaps he had overreacted but he's been deprived! He flopped back on the bed and now scowled to the ceiling. The nightmares he had been having turned into erotic dreams at some point. His eye twitched when one came to mind.

"What the hell is going on...?" He sighed, rolling over to lie on his stomach.

–

"So far, so good. You are indeed pregnant." Kabuto sat in a chair near where Hidan was lying. "Any questions? Feel free to ask now because I won't be seeing you for about two weeks."

"... Can I still have sex?" Hidan mumbled, barely audible.

"Come again?"

"Kakuzu's been really fuckin' horny and..." Hidan trailed as he felt his face heat.

"Oh, oh!" Kabuto laughed, "You should be fine... then again..." Kabuto rolled his chair to a desk to grab a file.

"What? What is it?"

"There is a very high chance of you having a miscarriage at the moment." He muttered, flipping through papers.

"Miscarriage? Is that when you lose the baby?" Hidan sat up, looking to Kabuto in curiosity.

"Yes. It can be quite sudden too sometimes. You'll have to avoid any and all types and amounts of alcohol throughout your pregnancy. As for your horny partner... I advise you try and talk with him."

"Out of the question." Hidan interrupted.
"... Fine. If you ever feel up to it, go ahead. In the meantime..." Kabuto smirked, "May I recommend hand jobs for your seme to ease him?"

"... Why did Phox have to choose you of all people?"

–

Phox and Kisame started to head for Hidan and Kakuzu's base to check on the latter. They arrived and found him lying on his back for a change (he rolled over). Kisame gave a silent chuckle when he moaned out Hidan's name.

"Wet dreams, really?" He smirked at Phox.

"The snake venom was special. It mentally links Kakuzu to Hidan." She explained quietly, retreating back to the living room.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, Hidan seems reluctant to tell Kakuzu about his pregnancy due to his reaction, right?" She continued when he nodded, "He's been dreaming about what it would be like to be a father."

"Warming him up to the idea."

"Exactly." She took a deep breath, "The wet dreams are because, when pregnant, the woman might have such dreams and fantasies. It's a side effect to the venom that he experiences a few mental symptoms Hidan will be having."

"Is it safe to assume you'll keep the others far away from them?"

"Oh yeah."

–

Once Kabuto had escorted Hidan home, Hidan headed straight for the kitchen. He hurriedly made himself a simple sandwich with water. After he finished, he went to the bathroom but paused as he was about to take a shower. As his thoughts wandered to Kakuzu, his body soon following.

"Kakuzu?"

He received a snore then bit back a laugh before sitting on the side of the bed. He was lying on his back and wore only his pants. Hidan studied his flushed face in confusion then let his eyes make their way south. He placed a hand on Kakuzu's neck and let it glide across his broad chest, relishing the feel of the multiple hearts beating and lungs softly working. Without thinking about it, his hand hovered over his partner's crotch.

"Mn... Hidan..."

Hidan gulped, his face dark red. Kakuzu felt warm down there and as his hand lowered he felt a dampness through the cloth. Hidan inhaled before getting on top of Kakuzu, legs gently straddling his rib cage with his face pointing south. He froze when the other shifted but then slid his hand under the fabric as Kakuzu eased, snoring lightly. Ever so gently, Hidan pulled Kakuzu's member from his pants and leaned towards it.

"Guh... you're lucky I fucking love you, bastard."

He rubbed the moist tip with a finger, pausing when another moan met his ears. He then brought his lips to it and placed a chaste kiss before slowly taking it in. His fingers made their way up and down the shaft, barely touching the skin. It was amusing how hard Kakuzu was from a simple dream.

"Hidan..." Kakuzu yawned just as his head met the back of Hidan's throat.

"Mnf?" Hidan's eyes widened; he was caught.

"What are you doing?"

Hidan rolled his eyes and pulled his mouth off to shoot Kakuzu a glare over his shoulder. However he did not answer before he started to tug and pull at his partner's erection. Kakuzu was panting by now having been without for five days, he was already so close to his orgasm.

"What's gotten into you all of a sudden?" Kakuzu asked, running his hands along his uke's sides.

"N-nothing!" Hidan stuttered; aside from a baby, nothing has gotten into him.

"Hmn. I'm sorry." Kakuzu inhaled sharply as Hidan returned to licking him.

"For what?"

"Yelling at you earlier." Kakuzu managed, removing his hands when he noticed them trailing along Hidan's stomach.

"Mn. I don't mind. I know how you fucking feel." Hidan shrugged before licking his scrotum.

Kakuzu did not reply. Instead he laid back and focused on the feel of Hidan's talented tongue and hands. As soon as Hidan's mouth was back around his aching member, he released within and moaned, returning his hands to Hidan's hips. He was startled when Hidan crawled off and ran to the bathroom to spit out the load. He usually swallowed it.

"... You want a turn now?" Kakuzu asked as his partner returned, wiping his mouth before covering up.

"Ugh, no. Now fuck off and let me sleep." Hidan grumbled, curling up a bit, arms wrapped around his stomach.

"... I don't want to fuck off alone though..." Kakuzu pouted when he heard Hidan snore.

He sighed though and soon wrapped his own arms around Hidan. He fell asleep soon with his face buried in Hidan's silver locks.

My mom needs to stop forcing my kitty (which she forced to get declawed) to be an outdoor kitty. Especially when I'm asleep and can't bring him in. Stupid bitch. He's wandered off and I have no idea how long he's been out. :( I don't want to lose another kitty because of her!