Papa's strength

Inuyasha was quiet when they returned to the Palace and after he had gone to bed, Izayoi and Makoto were called in to discuss what had been said. Makoto did not hesitate to repeat his mother's dying words to Inuyasha, and Izayoi said that Inuyasha had been upset by them and also by the family's reactions at first. She also told Inu no Taishou what she had said to Inuyasha and he was pleased that she still had no fear of her eldest child.

In the morning, Inuyasha was called into his father and the older youkai looked deeply into the boy's eyes. He could see a sullen expression and also fear, but he wasn't going to force Inuyasha's confidence in him, not yet. Gently he pulled Inuyasha onto his lap and wrapped him tightly in his loving arms, letting the boy feel surrounded in his father's strength and youki. Inuyasha was at first overwhelmed and alarmed by the sheer power of his father; his fear spiked and Inu no Taishou smiled at him before he reined the youki back to comfortable levels.

"Did I frighten you, My Little Inuyasha?"

"A bit, Papa."

"I am immensely strong My Pup; do you know that I could break your neck with just two of my fingers?"

"Could you?"

"Easily, I'll tell you a secret shall I? I could do the same to Sesshoumaru as well." Inu no Taishou smiled as Inuyasha giggled in delighted astonishment. "Are you afraid that I will do that one day?"

"No. You wouldn't hurt Shu...or me."

"But you do agree that I could?"

"Yes, you are very strong...but you make me feel safe when you hold me. Like when Shu holds me."

"Good, that is how it should be, your youkai needs to feel safe and you need to know your place in the pack, that is why those in your pack more powerful than you, make your youkai safe and loved. You respond that way because you have youki like me and like Shu and your Aunt. But because humans do not have our ability to feel the safety of pack, they can only fear the strength we have, because we could hurt them.

"That fear can frighten them so much that they do not see we are not going to hurt them and like Makoto's mother, it can make them say and do things that hurt us. Not usually physically, but our feelings can get very upset. That happened to you didn't it?"

"I didn't cry though." Inuyasha asserted proudly; but it made his father sad, Inuyasha was only a little pup.

"You were very brave and you showed you were not a monster because you didn't hurt anyone when they were nasty to you. But you could have cried if you wanted to."

"No. I didn't want them to know...and I'm glad she's dead the horrid bitch."

"Inuyasha that is not the way to talk about anyone and you got into trouble for calling her that before didn't you?" He was pleased at the pup's returning fire and amused at his tone, but couldn't let it pass without reproof. But now he had to check that his son understood what he had been saying, and after accepting Inuyasha's apology even with the sheepish grin, he continued;

"To youkai our youki is strength and reassurance, our power, and like all power it can be used wrongly, many youkai do use their strength against those weaker than them which is often humans. It is a form of bullying, but they can and do kill. I can kill and have done in times of war, but I am under control. My youki is under my power not the other way round. Do you understand My Pup?

"Makoto's mother was afraid of your youki because you are my son and are very strong. Of course you could kill humans, just as I or Shu could do so. But what she didn't want to realise is that we are not savages or animals that kill for pleasure. Humans can also kill and fight one another; they are far from immune from seeking power or wealth and often commit heinous, that means awful, crimes against others especially those weaker like women or children.

"Makoto was injured and the family attacked by humans not youkai, a fact his mother forgot when she was talking to you. What I am saying is that youki is natural to us, it is part of what we are; but to those without it, it seems monstrous. However like any sentient creature, those that can think that means; we learn control as we grow up. Any child should learn its boundaries or it runs riot, no matter the species; and that is why you learn what you can or can't do or say and why you will be punished if you forget or ignore them."

"I understand Papa."

"Perhaps you do Inuyasha, and we can talk about it again if you are unsure. But I want you to be prepared in case you think you have frightened your brothers and sisters. They are younger than you and only one has youki herself. They all love you, but just like I frightened you earlier, sometimes you might frighten them; but that can also happen with only humans. Inuyasha you have to be taught to control your strength, just as your human brothers have to learn when they find out they are stronger than your sister."

Inuyasha didn't understand fully all that his father had said, but he got the gist; he felt better and relaxed. Inu no Taishou wanted to do one final demonstration to get his point across and asked the pup if he wanted to feel a lot more of his father's youki strength to help him see why humans would get afraid. Of course Inuyasha said yes and Inu no Taishou held him tightly and let out his youki; at first Inuyasha was thrilled and excited now that he understood, but his father raised the level until the boy was scared and burst into tears.

Then it stopped and it was just Papa holding him warm and safe again. Inuyasha understood, he had youki and was afraid, how much more humans without youki would be scared. Inu no Taishou saw the understanding in Inuyasha's wet eyes and cuddled him, thankful that the lesson had been learned and would not be forgotten or at least he would be able to be reminded. He told Inuyasha that he had done that to Sesshoumaru too with the same result, when Shu had been arrogant once and had bullied one of the servants.

Once again Inuyasha felt safe and part of his family, not some freak; he belonged to two worlds and life was not going to be easy especially in the physically weaker one, but he was happier about what had happened and understood. It was a far more contented Inuyasha who went back to his mother than had left her; and when he went back to school, he was his usual quiet, but strong self. A quick explanation to schoolmates that he had to see his step grandmother before she died covered all that needed to be said to them.

"What is food to one, is to others bitter poison." – Lucretius